Strategies to stop letting others hurt you. I got a request for a blog post on this topic. It is a great topic and a great request. I am happy to address it and give you and idea of some of the positive things you can do to change it from being a problem.
Listen to your own heart. Turn your thoughts and attentions to positive thoughts. Focus on your confidence. Make your Mantras ones of worthiness and self love. See yourself ideal. Visualize.
See your self resilient. Some people mentally put a protective colored bubble around themselves. Others just learn to let it roll off them as water off a duck’s back.
The Mind Is As Strong As It’s Weakest Think
You get what you focus on. If you focus on unwanted comments and let them hurt you they will. If you choose to ignore them and not let them bother you they won’t. The choice is yours.
It never hurts to develop a thicker skin so you don’t take what others say too seriously. When someone calls you a name realize it is really more about them than it is about you.
Understand this and rise above being offended or hurt. Stop being a victim. People project. We all do. What they find wrong about you is most likely more about them than it is about you. Know this!
You Get What You Focus On
Decide to be different. Learn how to let it go. Understand it is other people’s projections even when it is well-intended. Say thanks for sharing and move on.
Criticism from friends or foe is an opportunity to examine ourselves and grow. Say thanks. Examine yourself. If it is accurate apply the appropriate action or remedy to make the changes.
If not, let it go. Put everything into perspective as best you can. Consider the source. Be grateful you have friends. Learn to appreciate what you do have.
Energy Flows Where Attention Goes
If a loved one tells you something you didn’t want to hear, it may be well-meaning even if non-supportive. They don’t intend to hurt you. Understand this. They meant to be helpful. Be grateful.
If an enemy, well, why even bother to let it hurt you. What would you expect from an enemy? Let that one go right away. Don’t give it a second thought. It is an enemy.
Whether from friend of or enemy you might just consider it a gift. Often times friends won’t tell you like it is. Someone who doesn’t like you might. Consider this.
The More We Do The More We Can Do
If someone could tell you something about yourself, you didn’t realize, wouldn’t you want them to? What if everyone knew it but you? Wouldn’t you want some one to be honest enough to say it?
‘Hey you got a booger on your lip’ or ‘Your slip is showing.’ As if this last one mattered today when people where their underwear on the outside. But you get the idea, right?
Sometimes feedback can be useful even from an unwanted source, said in an unwanted way. We should want the feedback that helps us grow even if we don’t like getting it. Be open to valuable input.
When People Hurt You Repeatedly Think Of Them As Sandpaper…
Choose to think differently. Decide to learn not to let other’s opinions bother you. First remember, opinions don’t matter. Everyone has one. So what? Don’t fall apart because of one.
Learn to control your thoughts and direct your mind. When negativity comes your way, recognize it and choose to focus on the positive. Direct your mind elsewhere productive and positive.
Do not be a victim of someone else’s crappy behaviors. Don’t allow yourself to suffer because people are stupid, cruel and unkind. Realize they have more to lose by being the way they are.
… They Scratch You And They Hurt You …
If you are a nice person. If you attempt to live well, respect others and don’t succumb to trading poisonous barbs then rise above it all. Feel sorry for the low life’s who can’t. Pity them and move on.
Develop you confidence and self-esteem. Use affirmations, visualizations and condition yourself. Develop your strengths and accept and let go of your weaknesses. Or develop them too.
If you can change something change it. If you can’t accept that you can’t and change something else that you can. Like your attitude. Change your attitude if you can’t change the other things.
… But Later You’ll Be Shining And Polished
In fact, just develop the attitude of a winner, a champion and a victor and you will be less likely to be susceptible to frivolous attempts to hurt you. You’ll be less like to be overly sensitive to well meaning criticism.
Well, there are a few things you can do. There are more. Perhaps, we’ll discuss them another time too. Meanwhile, gratitude works wonders. If you preoccupy yourself with being grateful for everything you are less likely to get hurt.
You can find the silver lining in the dark clouds. Look for the good behind all things. Miracles can happen when you are thankful. You get back more of what you focus on so focus on the best and let go of the rest. Be grateful, truly appreciative and celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes
Feel positive today. It’s a great day to find your best feelings!
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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.
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