The Reason Why 95% Of People Fail To Get What They Want

horizon distant-meadow-phil-koch

“Going after and getting what you want requires tenacity. If getting rich was always easy far more people would be rich. Whether you want success in your career, book more gigs, get an ideal job, have more romance and love in your life, be happier or buy that new home, it requires effort.

Welcome to Part 4 of The Secret To Success And Happiness Few Know And Won’t Tell You. We continue on today. I hope you found the first 3 parts valuable. Ready, let’s go. Part 5 tomorrow.

Success in all areas of your life, health, wealth, love, success, prosperity begins first in your mind. You must have the right mindset, attitude and beliefs. You must know you are capable of having what you want even when you aren’t exactly sure how to go about getting it. The results you are after first begin within you.

This Life Of Yours Is 100% Your Responsibility

You must know what you want. It must be worth it to you. You must be passionate about it and obsessed with getting it. It can’t be merely a passing fancy or you won’t last long in going for it. See it as having already happened in your mind. Affirm your ability to get it. Feel you can do it and perform the positive actions to get it.

Keep on working at it. Revise your plan.  Overcome and learn from obstacles and challenges until you arrive. Never give up if it is something you must have. Keep the faith always. This is the way you get what you want. You do not get it wishing and hoping for things to be different. You make it happen. You bring it about. Effort required.

You are always creating everything in your life. Your success and your failure. Your fun moments and your boredom. You never escape not creating what IS at any moment. Your response and your thoughts determine your feelings and your actions. Your mindset determines whether something is good or not good.

Accept Responsibility For Your Thoughts And Actions

You can’t escape this. I even suggest, if you are willing to, explore how what I just said isn’t true. Everything in your world, whether you enjoy it or not is up to you. Without your conscious participation none of it would exist as you know it. While this notion could be very abstract I simply mean you always determine the quality of your life.

Why do 95% not get what they want? Because they come up with excuses and reasons why they are not responsible for the outcomes and results they get. They will blame the world, god, others, the weather, the financial climate, themselves, their past upbringing, and anything else for why they can’t succeed as they want to.

The will consistently try to use these excuses and the stories they make up and tell again and again to explain why things are against them and it isn’t their fault. They have all the reasons, even great reasons why they should have but couldn’t get ahead. Their mindset isn’t supporting their success. It is inhibiting their success.

Be Accountable For The  Results You Get

You won’t succeed attributing your failures to others or things outside yourself. You must marshall your inner and outer resources and align them to go after, and continue to go after, what you want when the going gets tough. Your thoughts and attitude determine how far you will travel. Attitude is everything!

Your inner world must be rich with reasons why you succeed, why you can succeed and why you will continue to succeed. It must not be filled with junk logic and stories of how the world prevents you from reaching your  goals. EVEN if that WERE true it wouldn’t help you be or do or get what you want. Negativity doesn’t serve you.

Listen to coffee klatch conversation and you will hear the blames, the stories, the excuses, all the reasons why IT didn’t happen. IT never happens YOU make it happen. Listen, don’t try to change the person telling the stories it is up to them to learn and change themselves. Don’t argue with them, allow them to be who they are.

Take Ownership Of Your Mistakes

When we want to change and bring new things about; we want to think more positively or create new habits to replace old ones, when WE are making internal changes, these kind of stories and excuses can come up.  They’re part of our early conditioning. We learned them from others and made them our own.

We grew up being told things; we heard others discussing problems; we had our own experiences which we learned from. We soon realized  we may get in trouble if we don’t present the proper reason or excuse for our actions. We grew up learning to attribute certain things to ourselves and other things to others or the environment.

Much of our self attributions are negative. We blame ourselves for being stupid, weak, incapable and other negative things. We are afraid we won’t amount to anything or aren’t worthy. Perhaps, we feel we always have bad luck. That is the old negative chronic mental conditioning rearing its head when we blame ourselves or others.

Once You Take Responsibility For Everything In Your Life…

We blame ourselves, our parents, our teachers, our education or lack of it, the money we had or didn’t in early life, our home environment. Heck, we blame everything. As long as we blame we won’t accomplish because we are too busy finding all the reasons and excuses why we can’t and why we won’t. This is a given.

This is law. I’m not sure it is written anywhere, or if I just made up that it is law but figure it our for yourself. If all of your mental energies are focused on why something is wrong and can’t happen what is the likelihood it will? If you are preoccupied with YOUR personal story about what sucks what is RIGHT that you will find?

Not much right that is certain. In order to get what you want it helps if you take charge and shoulder that responsibility. If you get it or not own up to it. Then, if you wish to continue after it, you do what else you can do to potentially bring it about. When you take responsibility you put yourself in the position of power and control.

… You Can Transform Anything In Your Life

When you blame and excuse and tell all the reasons why you are unable you are a victim. If not in the real sense, you are in the mental sense. You live and think as a victim does, you have no control, no power, no ability to self-determine your present and future moments. Do you want to live without power or self-control?

Don’t look back on the past to make future changes unless your past supports you in that endeavor. Look to your successes to be more successful and not your failures or reasons why things didn’t work out for you before. Put on a positive, productive and powerful mindset and keep it on. That will help you to succeed.

You are not guaranteed success just by having a positive attitude all by itself. It is the beginning step you must have and must keep all the while in order to succeed. It is almost certainly guaranteed that you will not succeed maintaining a negative attitude. You won’t even begin to take action if you don’t think and feel it is possible.

You Are Responsible For Your Own Happiness

Why do 95% fail to reach their goals and dreams. Because they believe bullshit. They believe lies and stories they have been told and they keep telling for a long time. It is self deception. When we tell others our stories it is an attempt to save face and explain how circumstances, not ourselves, prevented us.

If you want to succeed. Get real. Stop the BS. Own up. Shoulder the responsibility, uncomfortable as it may first seem to be, but do it. Be responsible and accountable for your thoughts, feelings, actions and the results you get. Be honest. Be clear about it. Gear up your mind for success. Take control of it. Then success is much more likely.

When your mindset and attitude is right you feel right. When you feel right you do more of those positive actions that help you in your quest. You continue on despite the difficulty. Why? Because YOU are responsible IF you want to get the results. Others aren’t going to do your work for you. Get it? Own your changes! Own your actions!

Make Changes Or Make Excuses It Is Your Choice

Own the results you get favorable or not! Then you are a leader. You lead yourself. You are a commander. You determine what you want and you go after it. Others, if you are wise, can help in the spirit of friendly co-operation. You can assist others in similar fashion. Being in charge of yourself doesn’t put you in charge of others.

It can make you more attractive to others, Others may wish to help you because you are a person of passion, self determination, and inner strength. You are a positive force that others can recognize and respond to. Birds of a feather flock together. You can find yourself aligning with other powerful people to get things done.

So no more excuses. Find you inner champion. Take responsibility for all of your life. If you want more love be more loving. If you want better health engage in healthy practices. Be the change you want to become. Find the good in you and everywhere else. Find the reasons why it is possible, the solutions, and move forward. Look for all the reasons to be grateful right now and celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Have a great day!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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