Expert Reveals How To Handle And Prevent Trust Issues

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“You know how it feels when you trust someone; you take a person at their word, you expect them to follow through and they don’t. You feel hurt, angry or betrayed. At the least you feel disappointed and let down? I bet you have a discussion with yourself. Am I right?

Welcome to Part 20 of The Secret To Success And Happiness Few Know And Won’t Tell You. The series continues. Hope you are enjoying it. Feel free to comment. Part 21 tomorrow. Let’s go!

You blame that person. Perhaps, you vow to never again give your trust away. Right? Perhaps. It is hard to trust and be let down. It does nothing to improve relationships. A promise is broken no matter how big or small and people and relationships are affected by that.

Trust Is Like An Eraser It Gets Smaller After Every Mistake

Trust is defined simply as able to be relied upon, honest, truthful, dependable. We want people we trust to be these things and more. In return we may give our faith, our hopes, our respect. We may depend on them to carry through. We put great value on trust.

There are two people we need to be able to trust. The first is ourself. We need to keep our commitments or promises to ourself. We need to follow through on what we say to ourself and others. It we plan to clean our home or office then we should be sure to do it.

We have a relationship with ourself in a similar way that we have relationships to others. We are a person, we are important. We should love and respect ourselves. Too many don’t love themselves enough, sadly, while some others do, perhaps, too much.

How Can Anyone See How Awesome You Are If You Can’t See It

We should have a loving, kind, wonderful relationship on the inside. We should feel good about who we are. We should know we are a good person and worthy of good things. We ought to have a loving relationship with ourself and our self esteem should be high.

Our self image is important, as is our self talk. If you let yourself down, break your promises to yourself you are not treating yourself well. Why should you cause you to suffer a hit to your self image or self esteem? Why be disappointed in you? Stop. Don’t. Love, instead.

You feel better when you follow through. When you make a resolution keep it. Make a point to keep it. All day long we say to ourselves things we need or want to do. THEN do them. If it is realistic, possible, do-able and needs to be done – DO IT!

Trust = Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Keep your word to you! Don’t make excuses or blame. Don’t try to con yourself just keep your word if you give your word. Don’t play this game either. I knew children, when little, who would say this, ‘Uh huh, it doesn’t count. I didn’t say I promise in front of it.’ Stop!

If you say you will do something to or for yourself or another THAT IS THE SAME as saying you promise. If you say,’ I’ll get milk on the way home for you.’ Then do it! It is a promise. Someone is expecting you to follow through. Please understand this.

Whenever you don’t act according to your word you let someone down. Either yourself, others or both. Let your word be golden. It will improve your life, your relationship with you and with others. It will. You will learn and benefit in so many ways.

You Lose Credibility When You Don’t Keep Your Word

Commitment and the will to do is one of the great powers you have available to you. Some never tap into this power because they never leave their comfort zone, they aren’t too greatly challenged, they don’t keep their word or for a variety of other reasons.

Claim your power to follow through and you will find your life transforming. You get more done, will be more productive and learn how to get your goals and dreams. You benefit from being able to self start, or initiate and follow through. You complete!

When you are able to look back and check things off your list it feels good. You have an inner reward. When you keep your word and complete your tasks it feels good! Seek to reward yourself this way and your abilities and good feelings will increase greatly.

Silly Me – I Thought You Were Going To Do What You Said 

Make follow through a habit and personal change will get easier. Whatever you want to do with ease you must first do with diligence. You want to feel your best most of the time. This is another way to insure you do. Keep your promises to you and to others.

The other trust is with others. They need to be able to trust you and you them. I like to keep things simple. Trust is earned and given. To be considered trustworthy one must behave in a consistent manner and keep one’s word. Be sure you are always trustworthy.

Is it possible others will let you down? Of course. No matter how many times one has faithfully proven themselves it is possible. Should this happen you need to gather information at that time, to communicate effectively and discover why.

We Improve Relationships By Encouraging Not Criticizing

Make whatever relationship considerations there are at that time. It is likely, if they have consistently demonstrated trustworthiness, to have some extenuating circumstances and good reasons for the let down but again that needs to be clarified.

Discuss what happened and why. We can’t expect someone  to ALWAYS  act consistently, can we? People are people and anything is possible. Make certain we aren’t placing people in impossibly difficult positions to maintain. This includes ourselves.

There will always be disappointments, get over it. Find the positive and focus on the 98% that has been good and will continue to be. Get over the small amount that never may. Most of what we experience, good or bad, is due to our attitude in the first place.

The One Thing You Can Give And Still Keep Is Your Word

Anything is possible, don’t be gullible. At the same time, mistakes happen, someone is bound to screw up or let you down at some point so don’t get bent our of shape over it. Have you ever let someone down?  Suck it, life happens. Stop being a whiner!

If you want trust. Go first. Be an exemplar role model. EVEN THEN you may not get it 100% of the time from others?  Celebrate the relationships you have and encourage the behaviors you desire. Nurture more of what you want in you and in others.

Encourage what you want to be repeated. Remain open, positive and expect good results. Don’t get out of whack when things happen to disappoint. Pick up and keep going. Your relationship with yourself and others are important. Care well for each. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Today is your day!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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