“My recent blog was, what you can do if you shock or disappoint yourself? This one, examines what you can do if someone else, perhaps a loved one or friend, shocks or disappoints you. Guess what? What you do is really not that much different.
Stop. Take a deep breath. Let go. Sit with it. I know there is a tendency to blame the other person. It is a normal part of our prior conditioning to examine and complain about their behavior. We want to put it on them. Stop. This is an old habit pattern.
It is part of your brain’s ability to look for what is wrong. It looks for matches in our experience and finds what is wrong. Just stop. It won’t be easy. Shift away from blame and complaining to neutral. Take a deep breath. As long as you blame, you continue in the habit.
Accept What Is Let Go Of What Was Have Faith In What Will Be
In order to get free, explore what happens in you. What were you expecting? What did you hope and want? This is an opportunity for you to stop reacting and learn how to respond instead. Obviously, there is some trigger, some anchor in you that went off.
Whatever the catalyst, you reacted. Wouldn’t it be much nicer if regardless of the stimulus, you didn’t suck into it? The other does whatever they do and you remain centered, the eye of the hurricane. Examine this instead. What do they do that is a reflection of you?
Their behavior is a mirror of some aspect of you. Something you can let go of and change. Don’t blame yourself. Attempt to be open, available and don’t judge. Don’t judge or label them, what they do, yourself or, what you do as bad or wrong. It just is what it is.
Learn To Accept People For Who The Are – Let Go Stop Judging
Get it? You don’t want to over analyze this, either. You want to examine why you might react as you do. Whatever you find, let it go. Imagine how you can be free and how you would prefer to behave positively in the future. How could you respond differently?
How could you act more productively? How might you be more loving; compassionate? How might you be non-plussed and remain balanced? These thoughts help you to create a more wonderful future. Focus on what you want, not on the issues you have or had.
We’ll continue more the next blog. Meanwhile, find the blessings in your life and in your relationships. Delight in these. Accentuate the goodness. Focus on these blessings. Allow yourself to let gratitude well up inside you. Feel thankful. Celebrate everything!”Rex Sikes
Be easy on yourself today!
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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.
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