” How do you stay present? For most of us we are in the past or in the future. We are rarely right here, right now. What can we do when we think a negative thought, feel bad, have a craving, someone injures us verbally, or the world dumps problems on us? What to do?
The best approach is to learn to respond instead of react. Most of use knee jerk react. Someone hurts our feelings and we get mad, sad or try to get revenge. We react instantly to the offense. We are victims because we don’t think we have choice BUT we actually do.
The knack one must learn is to delay the reaction. Similar to delayed gratification. When you want that cookie NOW, delay getting it. Consider having it later. Stop rushing into it. You may wonder how to do this because you haven’t yet been able to. Practice delaying!
You Go Where Your Thoughts Take You – Let Go – Witness – Relax
When you feel bad, have a craving or someone says something that is an affront to you SIT with it. Stop judging it or anything just sit with it. Notice it. Be aware that it occurred. You need to train yourself that it is okay to just be and let it go. Yes, you feel it.
Sit with it. Some suggest sitting for a half an hour. Don’t judge it. Don’t judge yourself. Label nothing. Just feel it and sit with it. Do not indulge it just observe it. Yes, this takes practice if you never have done it but YOU can master it if you will only practice it regularly.
Sit with it for 30 minutes. Why 30? To allow it to dissipate. Simply watch. Slow down the internal feelings and internal self talk. SLOW down. Watch, witness observe. Don’t rush. Take time. After 30 minutes change it. Affirm something else. Do something else.
Skill Comes From Doing – It Gets Easier The More You Do It
Seek the positive. Shift from sitting with it to becoming positive. I am not saying you have to be happy for it but change it from being a problem. Learn to manage your thoughts and emotions and get truly present. You sat with it in the moment. NOW change it productively.
Put off you cravings. Don’t rush. It takes will power but you need to learn how to use your will power. Anything you want to learn to do well may seem impossible at first but with regular correct practice you can master this. It may take 30, 60, 90 days or more but do it.
Negative thoughts and feelings are a part of life. Everyone has them. BUT not everyone is hooked into them. Some have learned how to manage them better. Some learn how to shift from their difficulty to their inner resources. There is nothing wrong with negativity.
Listen And Learn The Lesson – Sit – Wait – Allow – Transform
Negative feelings are alert signals that you are thinking less than glorious thoughts. When you discover this be willing to sit and observe. Sit and transform. Simply recognize the thoughts and feelings for what they are. Don’t judge. Then change them.
Give it to god, the universe or whatever your personal belief is about a higher power. Surrender it. Give it over. Think, ‘thy will be done’. Let it go and let god. Look for the blessing. Look for the lesson. What can you learn that will benefit you and others from this situation.
If you want to be happy, peaceful, successful and live a wonderful life you need to learn to do new things and transform old ways. You take charge and learn to respond instead of react. Stop being Pavlov’s dog and slobbering every time your bell is rung. Get it? Change it!
If You Really Want To Transform Yourself You’ll Find The Way
Find the lesson and apply the lesson. In order to live successful transform yourself. It isn’t about others or circumstances it is about you. Be the change you want to enjoy. Expect the best, know it may be difficult but that YOU can learn to do this. Condition yourself.
Practice gratitude. Be grateful for the opportunity to change. Be grateful for the lesson in the less than glorious situation. Be grateful you have an opportunity to begin to do things in a new way. Be grateful you are learning to get ‘unhooked’.
Stop reacting, and take charge of your life. It is all a blessing! Delay gratification. Sit with the negative feelings. Stop judging. Let go. Change it at 30 minutes. Do anything else that makes you feel positive and is good for you and others.
If You Don’t Want To Transform Yourself You’ll Find Excuses
Seek to uplift not to harm. Count all as a blessing, a learning and opportunity. Recognize the good about you and your life. Love yourself. Accept yourself. You don’t have to be perfect. Stop being a perfectionist. Live, love, laugh. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes
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