Most People Have It Backwards, Do You? Stop Struggling – Start Succeeding!

horizons blue reeds

“If you are like most people you’d like to make positive changes in your career or in your life but you’re just not sure how to get started. Sadly, most people have it backwards. They put the cart before the horse. They effort, struggle and work their butts off yet still don’t make much progress. They are unable to move forward and they just are not happy.

They may be in debt and can’t seem to ever have enough money. They find themselves in relationships that are not fulfilling. They are overworked and stressed out. Whatever their issues are they stem from a typical mindset or paradigm.

Most of us were brought up believing this is the way it is. It is our paradigm. It is the only way we know. It is the Have, Do, Be mindset. If you are like most people, perhaps, you are struggling or frustrated with where you are in life. Maybe, you want something better but aren’t sure how to begin getting it.

Have, Do, Be Mindset

The majority of people believe that they must first have or acquire the things they want in order to be happy. They are taught that if they want good things, a car, a home, lots of money, the right lover, they need to work hard to get them.

Once they have them they will be able to do whatever they want which will allow them to be the way they want. Then they will be happy. So they work their butts off trying to get enough money, or the right house, or the right partner.

This mindset is the very cause of their problems. It delays happiness and puts it off. It brings about more of the struggle and hard times. It reinforces the current circumstances. For example, people think if they only have enough money it will allow them to do the things that will make them be happy.

The mindset they are living from is that they won’t be happy until they have something first. They are focused on lack. They are focused on not having what they want. What you focus on is what you get. So they remain unhappy and unfulfilled. They actually push happiness and success off and away from themselves.

For some reason others seem to be able to accomplish their dreams without stress and struggle. They seem to be able to arrive at success quite easily. What is the difference between these two groups of people?

Happy and successful people have a different mind set. They have one that works. It allows them to create and attract more happiness, wealth, success, and wonderful things into their life. It is just the opposite of the one described.

Be, Do, Have Mindset

These people know that they must FIRST focus on being. They know you must be (think and feel) happy or successful first. This is the prerequisite before you are able to see any changes in life. Be it first!

Once you are happy then you will naturally do the right things to get the things you want to have. The actions you take will be congruent or in alignment with how you think and feel.

The actions will seem easy, almost effortless, because they stem from the happiness you are already experiencing. The end result is because of who you are, the happy successful person, and the positive actions you are taking. You begin to manifest the things you want to have. Happiness and change starts from within you!

The model, Have, Do, Be means you put off being happy and successful for another day. It comes at another time. You delay it while you attempt to get those things that you think will make you happy. Plus, and this is a big point. The happiness one experiences comes from things outside of themselves.

In the Be, Do Have mindset happiness is immediate. It is in the here and now. It is within you. You are happy because of what you are thinking and feeling. You are in charge. Because you feel happy and successful you are much more able to do what is necessary to create what you want.

Because you are in control, because your power comes from within you, and you are happy and positive you are better able to create and attract and take advantage of favorable circumstances. You don’t have to wait to be fulfilled because you are fulfilled now!

When you operate from this place your ability to change for the better accelerates. If you BE as if you already have what you want you will naturally DO what you need to in order to accomplish your goals or get what you want to HAVE.

Happiness Comes From Within You

Your happiness comes from within you. Your happiness is independent of the world and of anything that occurs in the world. I repeat your happiness comes from within you no matter what the circumstances are.

When happiness and success are delayed and dependent of things or circumstances outside of you, people may get what they think will make them happy, only to discover they still are unhappy. They have stuff but still feel empty.

A multimillionaire told me to my face one evening in his home, “I have all this money. I thought it would make me happy. I was lucky I made the money. At the end of the day, I have this money but I am still me. I am not happy with who I am. I got lots but I am still me’.

This is sad because this gentleman truly is at the top of his game and renown in his field. He had anything that anyone could want to have but still was not pleased. He wanted himself to be better and he needed some help in this area. That is why he sought me out.

Eventually, he adopted the Be, Do, Have paradigm and made some profound personal changes. The fact of the matter IS Being comes first. This is just the way it is. Accept it! You correct yourself first.

You be happy, you be confident, you be loving, you be successful first. Then you can have more. The same is true for the other more useful paradigm. If you are happy first you will bring more of it about. it will expand.

Happiness Is A Choice

Happiness is a choice. You are in control of your thoughts and feelings. You choose to BE happy. So you will add to your happiness. From your happy and successful place you will do those things you love and enjoy and are passionate about.

You will be happy with whatever you have but because you are count your blessings you will have more things to count. This is why it is said, ‘those who have will be given more’, it hardly seems fair but that is how it works. Mindset, thought precedes everything else.

This blog site has page after page, article after article, on how to develop the right mind set. I have shared countless practices, methods and things  you can do on a regular basis to evolve yourself and become who you want to become. Time and time again, I remind you that you can be, do and have anything you want in life. So do it! Focus on BEING first and everything else will follow. Begin today!” Rex Sikes

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch

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2 thoughts on “Most People Have It Backwards, Do You? Stop Struggling – Start Succeeding!”

  1. Thank you for another article that I believe is spot on. It reminds me of what Neville Goddard says in bis book The Power of Awareness…assume the feeling of the wish fulfilled, and its manifestation is inevitable. And even if the wish is still not fulfilled, being happy makes life so much more worthwhile and rewarding:)


    1. Amen! And Thanks! Goddard is great! It makes so much common sense. Be happy then even if you don’t get your goal you are still happy. Who would argue with that? Thanks for commenting and all the best wishes!

      Liked by 1 person

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