Category Archives: Reframing

You Will Suffer Until You Realize This!

“The timeless principle is, there is cause and effect. You are the cause of the effects. You make things happen. From within so without. Yet, most people have it backwards. They think there are external causes that they are at the effect of. Hence, they suffer.

It is true we think there are outer circumstances and it is accurate that there are influences. However, we react or respond to these through the filters of our brain and mind. We have neurological and perception filters. We see through the filters of what we believe.

We see through the filters of the conclusions we have made about the world and our experience. What we experience in life simply goes to prove us accurate.  What we believe we see. What we don’t believe we don’t experience. Many believe the same things.

People Think It Is If I See It I Will Believe It – That Is Backwards

We grew up in a culture. We were educated by others. Beliefs and perceptions get handed down purposely or otherwise. People get stuck victims of circumstances. Those who succeed and prevail are those who most likely put themselves at cause and make it happen.

Everything happens from within you. This is the great teaching of spiritual masters through the ages. This theme runs through all traditions but it is difficult for most people to get it because it requires one shift away from their conditioning to new thinking.

It requires one take TOTAL RESPONSIBILITY for everything that happens in their life. Most people balk at this notion because they have been preconditioned to think things happen to them. They don’t. They happen because of us. Let’s pretend for a moment.

Your Beliefs Cause You To See What You Do And Don’t – Filters

EVEN if this were not true it would be a useful frame of mind to adopt because instead of whining and complaining about things the person who takes total responsibility would take steps to change what they didn’t want into what they did want. They’d take charge.

They wouldn’t be a victor they’d be a champion. Get it? When you accept responsibility for everything it means you run the show. It puts you in the seat of active power. Wouldn’t you prefer to be a champion than a loser? Mindset rules all of our life.

It determines our feelings and our actions. Hence, mindset determines the results we get or don’t get. ‘If it is to be it is up to  me!’ Is a great saying because it let’s you know WHO IS responsible. You are! I am! Get it? Take responsibility and celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch

The Secret To Preventing And Managing Overwhelm

“Sometimes crap shows up. Sometimes you have so much on your plate, you aren’t sure what to do. You feel physically stressed and mentally overwhelmed. Your spirit may be broken and you are suffering from all of it. What to do? What can you do?

First, you must realize, and recognize, that the feeling of overwhelm, or stress, is a signal that you are denying, or preventing, yourself from co-operating internally and, most probably, externally. When things get tough people tend to negatively accelerate their thoughts.

They get caught in a spin. Things move too fast and feel crummy. You need to create a break space for yourself. You know that already, because you are probably wishing for one. You need to take a break or do something to change yourself so you can feel better.

Let It Go – Life Is Too Short To Get Caught Up In Empty Drama

You hope things will work out but you probably don’t expect them to. Get it? Whenever you feel overwhelmed you need to pause, to stop to breath, and understand you’re communicating something to yourself. You need to relax and co-operate with yourself and others.

You have to recognize you are resisting what is going on, and what you are resisting is persisting and causing you the discomfort. Much of the ill at ease feelings will disappear when you stop putting your energy into resisting what it. You need to look for how to allow.

You need to seek to accept. Seek out what you can let go of. I don’t mean forget about, I mean, let go of. Stop fighting and begin working with it. Find solutions, instead of problems. Find co-operation, instead of pushing. When you push, you get push back. Relax. Allow.

Refuse To Entertain Negativity – Shift – Focus On The Positive

Surrender doesn’t mean giving up, it means releasing the fight to do things in a different way. Let go of the struggle and the negativity and allow the positivity to flow. Turn your attention. Shift your thinking and feeling. You may need to do some physical things.

Walk, exercise, go camping or hiking. Do anything positive to create space for yourself. Get a massage. Meditate. Go to church or temple. Whatever works for you. Create positive space where you can relax. Let it go. Then chunk everything down into manageable bits.

Any large task can be broken down into smaller, easier, manageable pieces you can do more readily. Overwhelm out of control helps no one. Look for how you can better work with others. Seek harmony. When you do, everything can begin to lighten up. Get this?

Chunk It Down – You Eat An Elephant Bite By Bite – Easy Does It

Things remain the same because of our own hold on them. We habitually react and keep perpetuating the same old, same old. In order to have something different we must do something different. Delight, let go, change something. As you change things will change!

Give up the fighting. Become fluid and flexible. At the first sign of overwhelm and stress, change. Divert it. Shift and move and create what you want instead. Don’t be a victim of it. Stop and create what you want. Be grateful. Feel good.  Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

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Without Self Control You Are Stuck And Face Blocks
When You Learn Self Control And You Can Master Anything!


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MENTORING AND COACHING CANDIDATES, and those interested in learning more, come join me now! Send email or leave comments, but reach out NOW! New programs available.

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How To Handle Unexpected Bad Events

What to do when unexpected bad happens? Something comes along, out of the blue, that is less than glorious. How can you best handle it so  you don’t create more problems? How can you begin to create more opportunity and manifest good things for your future?

It is all depends on what you think and what you say to yourself and to others. Keep in mind the notion I frequently promote here. Speak only to bless, heal and prosper. Don’t repeatedly tell, and relive, the ‘negative’ story. Stop doing that! Instead, tell one that supports you.

Say, ‘well I didn’t expect that. Some people might say they had a problem. I have a new opportunity presenting itself to examine and utilize my resources. I don’t know what to do about it, yet, but I know everything always works out well for me in the end.’

Train Yourself To Find The Blessing In Everything – Feel Blessed

‘I also know that in adversity is the seed of opportunity. This situation will help me get clear on what I want. Getting really clear about what I want will help me make it happen.’ Don’t judge or label it bad.  Simply say, it’s something you didn’t expect.

Don’t get negative. Don’t speak in less than glorious terms. Do not ignore it. Don’t lie about it. Don’t say it is ‘all fabulous’ if you don’t feel that. That only creates internal conflict. Don’t create a conflict. Simply, reframe how you think and speak about all of it. Get it?

Simply say, ‘I have a situation and I don’t know how it’s gonna work out. Ultimately, it’s gonna work out for the best. Things always work out for the best. I’m gonna celebrate the learning and all the opportunities that are now before me. This is an opportunity.’

Count Your Blessings Not Your Problems – Think Differently

‘I have an opportunity to think, feel, be, do and act differently than I had planned. All of it is an opportunity. All of it will work out. I just don’t know how, yet, so I’m going to get clear on what I do want. I’m going to work on what I can make happen.’

Things never work out the way you think they will. There’s always twists and turns and surprises, so you might as well get used to that. Accept it. Life is an adventure. You can plan but, almost always, your plans will change. Life is ups and downs. Life provides contrast.

Adversity helps you. Perhaps, you really do need what is occurring in order to get clear and focus intently on what you want. Perhaps, you  have to intensify your pursuit. Use it to your advantage. It is a good and positive thing that happened. Get clear on your goals.

Be Grateful For Small Things Big Things And All In Between

You can never know how things will turn out. Adventures are filled with good times and challenges. All of them are a blessings. Sadly, you and the rest of us, have been previously conditioned to accept some and reject others. You have beliefs about what is good and bad.

Until now, you may not have believed that these events can be blessings. Most of us were conditioned to dislike the unexpected. We whine, blame, excuse. and accuse. So we lose out and we suffer. We suffer because of our chronic, old conditioned mindset.

Now you have opportunity to go beyond your beliefs and evolve as a person. You can go to a higher level. When everything is a blessing your life becomes incredible! You didn’t get the outcome you expected. So what? Celebrate. It is a gift and a blessing! Get it?

Perception Is Everything – Believing Is Seeing – It Is All Up To You

Still, you may not yet believe this. These kind of experiences, these lessons, these opportunities, will happen over and over again until you learn that this IS how it works. Everything is a blessing. Give yourself room to accept this. Until you do, expect the unexpected.

Begin to believe that everything happens for your good even though you may not be able to see what that is right now. Don’t let defeat define you. Don’t succumb to negativity because ‘crap’ hits the fan. What anything IS is whatever you DECIDE it is. It’s all up to you.

Things happen to you. It can all be good. You just haven’t believed that before. Give yourself permission to. Accept and allow it and your life can transform. Find the silver linings. Consider everything an opportunity, a lesson and a blessing. Give yourself permission to shine! Feel grateful. Express your gratitude. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes


Surrender to the moments!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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