Category Archives: Habits

How To Make The Changes You Haven’t Been Getting

“Life not going the way you hoped? You think you are doing everything right, everything you can do, but things turn sour. What is going on with that? Can you get what you want without all the drama and upheavals?  Responsibility is most likely the issue.

In today’s age, few people seem to want to take responsibility for anything. Blaming and accusing others while making excuses for ourselves seems to rule. ‘I wasn’t late. It was the traffic!’ ‘It isn’t my fault. My parents never taught me.’ ‘Damn corporations!’ Get it?

We have a tendency to shift the responsibility away from ourselves. We don’t hold ourselves accountable. If we really want to change and create the best life ever, this is an important area to begin to make some changes in. Each of us needs to live to a higher standard.

Distance Yourself From Negativity And Beautiful Things Happen 

IF things aren’t going the way you hope, then the responsible thing to do is to accept 100% responsibility for any, and all, results you are getting, or not getting. When things go bad it is time to reflect on our thoughts and behaviors, not accuse and blame others. Reflect!

If things aren’t going the way that you hope, or the way that you would like them to, STOP and look at what you were vibrating. What are you thinking and feeling? What are your predominant thoughts in or outside of your awareness? Analyze your thoughts and feelings.

Look to yourself so you can change yourself, and your thoughts and your feelings. Stop blaming outer circumstances and others. Change your thoughts, your feelings and your actions. Accept responsibility and become accountable for what you do, or don’t do. Get it?

Either You Run The Day Or The Day Runs You

It is all on you. By deciding to be accountable you put yourself in the driver’s seat. You take charge. Your circumstance isn’t up to, or on, anyone or anything else. It is all completely up to you. Whether you do it, or not. Whether you make it happen, or not. It is all your doing.

Yes, many people don’t want to accept that. They haven’t lived that way, so making this change seems difficult. That’s right, it SEEMS difficult. Once you begin the process, it gets easier and easier. It is mental conditioning. Like anything else, it gets easier as you do it.

Consider this: for years and years and years you have lived habitual, chronic, less than glorious, limited thinking and beliefs, feelings and actions. Then you discover the Law Of Attraction and positive thinking and think everything will magically change. You wish it.

All Things Are Difficult Before They Are Easy 

You hope that spending 10 minutes, or so, each day thinking positive about what you want, will change everything. You do it for awhile but at the first speed bump, if you are like many, throw in the towel. They give up. They blame it and claim it didn’t work. Get it? Do you?

That is wishful thinking. The TRUTH is, it requires a reconditioning of your thinking. How quickly things change is up to you. It could happen almost instantaneously. Usually, it requires more time. Just as planting a seed takes time to develop and grow and blossom.

The promise of the Law Of Attraction is that the PREDOMINANT thought in your mind, is what you will make happen. It is what you are thinking about most often that you become, do and have. You become what you think about most frequently. Get it? Do you?

What You Think About Most Often You Become

What are your most often thoughts? What do you spend most of your time attending to? Is what you want a burning desire? Is it an obsession? Are you mostly concentrating on the good you desire and imagining how good it feels to have that right now, or not?

IF, most of the time, you’re thinking distractions, petty annoyances; the traffic, weather, gossip, blaming government, others. the media, and the weather, THEN you are spending your time with less than glorious elements, negative and wasted thoughts. Its your time!

If you are noticing the distance between where you are and what you want, you are focused on the lack, and on not having it. You are concentrated on how you don’t have what you wanted; how far a distance it is, until you get there. So that’s what continue to create. 

Feelings Are The Driver – You Choose What To Feel – Feel Great

Get it? It is all up to you, not the environment or others, to make happen what you want to make happen. I’ll share more next blog but for now get used to the idea of taking 100% responsibility for everything in your life, good or bad. That decision is life changing!

Everything can instantly change the moment you make a powerful decision to take charge. I don’t mean suddenly rainbows and fairy dust appear. I mean you assume control of your life and from that starting point you are ABLE to make changes you weren’t before.

When you get that it is you doing it, everything becomes different. As long as others do it to you, you are a victim. You are tossed around like a rudderless, and powerless, boat on the sea. You need to operate from your own strength and power. When you do, everything does begin to change! Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

You Are Governed By What You Don’t Know!

“Not everything is the same. Some things matter far more than other things. ‘Well, yes’, you say, ‘that’s obvious.’ BUT is it? Some things that are truly important, and run the show, are those things we aren’t aware of. We are governed by what we don’t know.

Not all thoughts are equal. Some are random thoughts that come and go. It is the ongoing, chronic thoughts inside, and outside, of your awareness that have the power. What are you thinking that you are not aware of? What do you repeatedly think day in and day out?

It is these thoughts that make the difference. Since, at least, the early 90’s I have pointed out that we think about 65,000 thoughts a day. Upwards of 90%, some estimate between 95-99%, of those thoughts are the same today as we thought yesterday. Imagine that.

We First Make Our Habits – Then Our Habits Make Us

There’s not much in the way of new thinking in us, is there?  You can’t track 65,000 thoughts. Most operate unconsciously, subconsciously outside of your awareness but happen reliably, automatically just the same. These are habitual thoughts. Chronically negative, too.

Habitual thoughts determine our reality. Right this instant we are right where our thoughts have brought us. Tomorrow, we’ll be where our thoughts take us. If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got. You will be the same tomorrow.

Unless you change your thinking!  If, on a scale of 1-10 your life is a ten, then you should keep doing what you are doing. However, if you are off by any number, you might want to change some things and change your life for the better. It is the only way to change!

What Unconsciously Consumes Your Mind Controls You Life

Why the photo above? The water looks lovely. In the water are countless living organisms we can’t see. They are there, living, but we don’t know. There is lots of other stuff hidden in the depths of the water. The water is teeming with things unknown and unseen.

Your habits govern you. Subconscious, chronic limited thinking keeps you limited. You must uncover, release and let go your negative thinking. You must shift your conscious, and unconscious thinking, to be mostly positive and powerful. Can’t stay the same.

You need positive, supportive thought habits. If you aren’t living the life you want, I want to help you create your best life, ever. That is why I write this blog and conduct seminars, workshops and training. You must learn to control and manage your thoughts and feelings.

You Can’t Control Behaviors If You Can’t Control Your Thoughts

When calamity, or bad situation, occurs it triggers old memories, associations, and negative neural-net habits of thought, feeling and action. You must change these to be better. You want triggers to release good, positive, powerful thoughts instead of the bad.

Gratitude is a wonderful place to begin. Become thankful for everything. Focus on gratitude. Increase it. Be thankful. Express it. Speak it and write it. Think about it and delight. Join me in deciding to make your life the best life ever. Start now. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

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Celebrate yourself and others today!

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Photo by me.   Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch

How To Be A Failure

For centuries, leaders have been trying to teach how to be a success. I decided to show you what leads to failure so that maybe, just maybe, you will stop doing that and change! Unsuccessful people, failures, do things differently than people who are successful.

They think crappy thoughts. Do you think negative; think like a loser? Don’t believe you can. Excuse, whine, accuse, blame others and the world around you for your situation. Crappy thoughts lead to crappy feelings. You feel bad then think more crappy thoughts.

It is a cycle. Crappy feelings don’t make you feel like doing anything. You are unmotivated so you take no constructive actions. No actions leads to no results or bad results. Bad results lead to more crappy thoughts and more crappy feelings and doing even less. It’s a cycle.

What Consumes Your Mind Controls Your Life

Bad thoughts lead to bad feelings, lead to bad actions, lead to bad results, lead to bad thoughts. The cycle perpetuates itself. IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT? If the answer is ‘no’ then you must start by changing your thinking. That IS the very FIRST step.

If you want your life to change you must change things in your life. You cannot continue doing the same things repeatedly and expect it to be different. That is crappy thinking. Your habits of thought, feeling and action define you. Your reality is created by you.

If you want to change, you change your thinking. Positive thoughts lead to positive feelings, which lead to positive actions, which lead to positive results. The cycle perpetuates itself. You have a choice. You have a decision to make each moment. Which cycle do you prefer?

You Become What You Think About Most Of The Time

Which one is your present reality? If it isn’t what you want decide to change it today. Begin reading and listening to positive, inspiring, motivational material. Recite affirmations. Visualize. Take an active approach to changing your thoughts. Take charge of your thinking.

Shift from the negative. Don’t repeat negative thoughts out loud. Stop telling stories to family and friends how things suck. Begin to think differently. Start thinking and saying, ‘I am not sure, yet, how it is going to work out but it will all work out for the best.’ It will!

DO things that make you feel good. Get a massage. Go for a walk, a swim, a movie. Enjoy a nice meal. HANG OUT with positive, inspiring, motivating, encouraging people. Take a seminar or workshop. Express your gratitude. All of this makes a difference.

What You Say Is What You Get – Change Your Self Talk And Story

If you keep doing what you always have you will continue to create what you already have. If it isn’t what you want that is a shame. There is no one who is doing it to you, but you. Right now you can change that. Start today. Be grateful! You can. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

ENJOY!

Make today marvelous!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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Why Pain May Persist: What To Do About It

“Some of you know I have been healing from nerve pain in my back and legs. A friend stated that it seemed like a long time to be dealing with this injury and wondered if I shouldn’t choose a quicker option, such as surgery. I answered him this way.

I had wanted to get back in better shape for some time. Still, I put it off. I’d work on the computer instead of exercising or going to the gym. It was convenient, easier, less disruptive to just continue than to add more exercise in. I put it off for quite some time.

I got injured. The pain is tremendous. The only way out is through. My chiropractor said, ‘you need to get your back, back in shape’. I understood that. It was clear. Yes, I must. AND it hurts!! It meant pushing through discomfort. It mean accepting the hurt.

First Step Toward Change Awareness Second Step Is Acceptance

I have written about this in previous blog posts. The point I want to make today is, having this pain persist and having to work at feeling better, gives me the time needed to establish new routines and habit. If the pain went away immediately, I might not continue.

If it were miraculously resolved I might very well have gone back to the old, routine of working, instead of exercising. The continuation of pain is motivation to get better. Now daily, I see the chiropractor, I do PT in the pool and I walk around the block frequently.

It has been 3 almost 4 weeks now. I am into the habit of taking better care of myself again. I am grateful for this experience and for the duration of the pain. It is truly a blessing even if it seems not to be, or that it hurts. The pain is doing its job. It is awesome!

Time Doesn’t Heal Everything – Acceptance Will Heal Everything

I am proactive about my health again. Eventually the pain will subside. By then, I will have grow accustomed to working out. I do actually look forward to it now, each day, as I did when I was quite fit. I am building good habits, again, and I am pleased about that.

Pain is a signal and a means for me accomplishing some important work on myself. Does the pain know this? Is it ordained by anyone or anything? I haven’t a clue. It may be only a useful reframe, but useful it is. Perception is everything. It really is!

If I state the pain persists to get me off my ass so I take an active role in being in better shape, so be it. It works for me. It truly does, in that I do get relief when I do the PT. So the pain will be around for as long as necessary. Then no longer. All is good. It IS as it is!

Whatever The Present Moment Is – Act As If You Had Chosen It

What we think and how we think about things is important. As I began to celebrate the pain, and consider it a blessing, it began to change and diminish. Sadly, many people don’t consider the benefit or value of pain physical or emotional. We try to avoid it.

Embracing it is a whole new freedom. Things do shift. It allows for much new insight and evolution. While I don’t wish this on anyone I can say, learn to be grateful, it makes a difference. Acceptance moves you through it quicker than resistance. It is all perfect.

It is what it is. I also focus on where, what part of my body feels the best. Which sensations do I enjoy the most? I focus on the water, how wonderful that feels. I emphasize the movements I can make easily. I shift from what hurts to what feels great. It is about focus.

Work With It Not Against It – What You Resist Persists – Accept

So the pain serves many useful purposes. I get to workout and control my attention to things. I focus on the good feelings not the bad ones. Anyone can do this. Anyone can learn. The more we focus on what we want and the good stuff, the more we get back.

So celebrate and enjoy! Find all the good, groovy, cool stuff to marvel in. Find the silver linings. Get to the gold beneath all the dirt. When digging for gold you look for the gold you don’t care about the dirt. Get it? Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

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ENJOY!

How much delight can you stand to have today?

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Why You Keep Having The Same Problems Over Again And What To Do About It!

“Why do you keep having the same problem again and again? Believe it or not, it’s because the universe supports you. It keeps giving you the lesson over and over and over and over again until you learn the lesson. Universe or subconscious, it is the same thing.

Your story keeps you doing it over and over again because what you say is what you get. You keep repeating to yourself or others the same old chronic conditioning. You keep living out of your conditioned mind and habitual thoughts and beliefs. It’s the same!

It doesn’t change from day to day. Unless, you actually take responsibility to change it. You aren’t responsible for getting conditioned at an early age. It isn’t your fault. You are responsible for changing it as an adult. As you become aware of it, you can change it.

The First Step In Changing Is Becoming Aware

Some ancients would consider this play the wheel of karma. You repeat it until you get it right. You live out your drama trauma until you say, ‘enough already!’  Then you act to change it. That is what it takes. You have to begin by changing your thoughts and beliefs.

You have to change your story and what you think and say to yourself and others. You have to re-write your history and write a fulfilling future. You need to take charge as the author of your life story and write it as you want it to play out. YOU must do this.

But you say, you have done affirmations. Okay, but what is the preponderance of your thinking like? Is it mostly positive or mostly negative? You must shift the balance. You must tip the scale to mostly positive thoughts and energy. That begins the changes.

Become Aware Of What You Are Thinking And Feeling And …

You can affirm positively. You can affirm negatively. Either way you are still affirming. IS your focus MOSTLY on what you want and what you want to be, do and have? Because if it has been mostly on what you do not want you are affirming that and creating that result.

You need understand this. Then stop and take 100% responsibility for creating everything in your life. The good and the bad is all your doing. Some people balk at this thought. They don’t want to believe that they are accountable for everything. I understand that.

I didn’t want to believe it, either. Who does? Think of it as a mental template to organize your thoughts and beliefs, your feelings and actions, and nothing more than that. It doesn’t have to be true or not true to be effective. Think of it as a useful reframe to guide you.

… Recognize The Law Between Your Mood And Circumstances

Focus on what you want. Find or create a way to make it happen. In doing this you’ll be learning how to manifest those things that you desire and eliminate those you don’t. Let the things you don’t want go. Drop them. Stop affirming them. Stop speaking about them.

Write a different story. Speak a different story. Live a different story. Act as if you are the person you want to be, living the life you want to live. Play that out in your mind. Enhance the positive. Accentuate it. Leave the less than glorious behind. Let that stuff go. Drop it! Drop!!

You don’t have to force the negative to leave. You don’t have to quit them. You don’t have to resist them. You just drop them. Withdraw your attention. Focus on what you want. Ignore what you don’t. Leave the old behind. Move forward with the new. AND be patient.

Everything Shows Up In Your Life To Teach You Something

Just as when you plant a seed it takes time to grow and produce fruit. In the meantime, until you get it, until you learn the lessons, you may keep getting the lessons, the  same circumstances, the same people, continue to show up in your life. It is all a blessing for you.

It is a mirror for you. It is the universe or your subconscious, or god or whatever attempting to get you to know who you are beyond your conditioning.  It will show you your conditioning repeatedly, so you become aware of it so you can drop it. Do you understand this?

It is to help you move into your higher self. To live from a new domain. One that is there PRIOR to your conditioning. Your conditioning, my conditioning, masks who we really are. So it is a pretty good deal when you think about it. It is for our GOOD!

Negative Breeds Negative Thoughts – Positive Breeds Positive

You have infinite intelligence, the entire universe, god or whatever you want to call it, working on your behalf. The goal is to recognize who you truly are! Recognize you are a magnificent creator and attractor. You are the one behind the thoughts. You are behind the thinking  and the feelings. You are the source! Accept it. Live it. Embrace it. Celebrated it. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

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ENJOY!

Celebrate yourself and those around you today!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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A Few Important Ideas To Keep In Mind!

horizons i-lose-myself-phil-koch

‘If you want to be happy set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy and inspires your hopes.’ Andrew Carnegie

‘Remember, no more effort is required to aim high in life, to demand abundance and prosperity, than is required to accept misery and poverty.’ Napoleon Hill

‘If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall in place.’ Lao-Tzu

The Universe Desires You To Have Everything You Want To Have

‘Happiness does not depend on what you have or who you are; it solely relies on what you think.’ Buddha

‘Any idea, plan or purpose may be placed in the mind through repetition of thought.’ Napoleon Hill

‘You become what you think about.’ Earl Nightengale

Have a fantastic day!

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Unless You Do This You Are Bound To Fail!

horizons wind-point-phil-koch

“For nearly 40 years I have asked this question in articles, presentations and seminars near and far, ‘What is it that stops most people?’ What is it that prevents people from being happy, having the career they want, a great relationship and living their dreams?

Some answer fear. Some say doubt. Others answer procrastination. Apathy some say. Others chime in struggle, it’s too hard. Failure, they give up. I get many similar answers. What is the bottom line? What are all these made of? What is common among these?

Thoughts. A thought. A mental packet of elctro-chemical energy is what stops most people. People think they are afraid. They have thoughts of doubt; they think it is too hard. They tried and are convinced they can’t succeed. They think, ‘I’ll do it later.’

Who You Think You Are Or Are Not Can Hold You Back

This is why I have been a champion for gaining control of what goes on in your head, between your ears, and in your body. People allow themselves to lose out, miss out, not have what they want and don’t even try because of what they think repeatedly day in and day out.

The truth is this! ALL IT IS IS A HABIT! You think it otherwise? Of course, you do AND that IS the point. People have learned lines of thinking that they repeat blindly throughout the years that determine the course of their lives and they do not change it.

They think the same thing over and over and wonder why life doesn’t change. IT WON’T either unless people change what they learned to do so well. In order to change one needs to know a changes is necessary. One needs to become aware. Awareness!

Discipline Is Your Friend Not Your Enemy – Create Good Habits

Then one needs to know what to change and change it. If you are engaged in a non-supportive or destructive habit then you must first realize it is the habit causing the problems and replace the habit with a better, supportive productive one. Get it? You must do something.

If you do nothing everything remains the same. Some people try many things, they change jobs, they try to diet, they change partners, they move to different locations BUT their thinking remains the same. That is why they marry the same person again and again.

That is why they find themselves repeating the same mistakes in different places. Their thinking remained the same. Take charge of your thinking and you can begin to change everything for the better. You can make improve your life. You can improve everything.

The Only Difference Between A Good And Bad Day Is Attitude

After all it is only a thought. Thoughts can be changed. The thoughts you think are the basis for your feelings and your actions. What you think and believe create your reality, your present and your tomorrow. Your thoughts form your experiences.

Learn to change your thoughts! Learn to manage your thoughts. Learn to take charge of your thinking and you will improve your life! Everything can begin to change when you choose what you think. You win when you tell your brain what to think instead of your brain telling you. Take charge! Choose! Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Surprise yourself!  Do something new today.

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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