What To Do When Everything Sucks

change your direction not your decision

“The goal in life is to feel good right? We should enjoy life, live fully, delight in everything. Celebrate. But what about those times when you just don’t or can’t? What do we do about those moments? It certainly would be useful to know, wouldn’t it?

People who love themselves and appreciate life and all it offers know that sometimes we just get stuck. They understand that there are challenges, upheavals and down times. They know that sometimes you just sit in traffic and don’t seem to make any progress. They understand the burn, frustration, anger and sadness that may accompany these moments. They realize sometimes we just have to fester awhile.

Many take heart in the motto ‘This too will pass’ . They understand that just as there is night and day, dark and light, cold and hot that there is a rhythm to life and that things do change. They ‘get it’ that the waves on the water come in, the tide rises and the waves go out and the tide goes down. They know there are seasons and time frames in which different challenges exist.

People who successfully navigate the tough times know that there are going to be these times and the accept it. They may try to navigate around them when possible but they don’t run from them. There are tough times that may seem to last forever. There are great times that seem to end too soon. There are times when nothing seems to change and we grow bored or weary. All of these occasions are just a part of life.

We need to understand what we can control and what we are not able to control. We may not be able to change the world but we can learn self control or self management or self improvement when we go though tough times. Tough times while not welcome are useful.

You-must-take-personal-responsibility-quotes.-

There is the saying ‘We can’t change the wind but we can adjust our sails’. Most everyone knows, ‘When life gives you lemons make lemonade’.  So it isn’t about controlling, manipulating or changing the outer world to conform to our wishes but it IS about evolving ourselves to meet any challenge. We may not be able to change the world we can change ourselves and our responses!

When these challenges occur it is an opportunity to surrender. We need to learn how to surrender because as much as we might try make the world conform to us or change the circumstances some things in life just don’t happen until they are ready to happen.

Surrender. It is the time to allow and not resist because what we resist persists. So don’t fight it. This may seem difficult but this IS precisely what we need to learn. We need to learn how to navigate these times more productively and not get caught in the ‘trauma drama’. We need to understand sometimes we have to be patient and wait.

We need to learn how to seek feedback. We need to find the seed of opportunity that exists in the challenge. Through all of these experiences we can grow and develop when we understand how to best respond. We can experience great freedom in letting go.

When things change we tend to react out of habit. We do what we have always done previously. If what we always do is less than glorious, brings us or others more pain; if it doesn’t work very well and these habits aren’t serving us then it is time to learn and develop new habits.

repetition is the mother of skill

We always have choice. We really do. We can choose to do something or choose to do nothing but both are choices. Challenges will always be there but we can grow in spite of them. The way of the world is that things just happen. Unexpected things happen. Some expected things loom on the horizon. The choice is ours about what we think and feel and do.

Someone said, ‘Worry is praying for things we don’t want’. We should stop it. Complaining and whining only bring us more less than glorious thoughts and feelings. Gratitude and celebration may be tough at first but will bring us more of the feelings of thankfulness and insight than fretting and being upset will.

Relax, allow, and go with the flow. These will bring us more rest so we can gather our resources. These are times for self-reflection. Self examination and making new positive choices (especially when forced to) can lead to new positive thoughts and behaviors and new habits. Through reflection, during times of struggle, we can find ourselves renewed.  Gratitude and celebration for the challenge will open our eyes to possibilities we might otherwise miss.

Remember, ‘we become what we think about’. We get what we focus on.  Like attracts like, birds of a feather flock together so we need to choose the best, the highest the most glorious thoughts and feelings we can find to fill our minds. When we stick with these we will find more of them. In staying on course we will discover incredible value and can begin to build a positive new habits that serve us better.” Rex Sikes

Have a delightful in your day!

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