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Creating The Future, Learning, Responsibility, Success, Win Win Outcomes

A Great Way To Go From Zero To Multimillionaire!

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Hey There,

Got a moment? How are you doing? New Blog post is coming shortly but I wanted to share this with you. I believe it is very important.

I wanted to share with you this incredible opportunity. I think it is important enough to send as an extra special announcement. I have been a big fan of T. Harv Eker because his programs and materials work.

I have spent lots of money learning from Harv. I am so glad I did. I am also proud to say you can find my work within much of what he teaches too.

I am sending this to you because I believe in it. I believe if you apply what you learn from Harv you can absolutely transform your life and begin to live it on your own terms.

Full disclosure. I get nothing from Harv when you take his free programs or download materials. If you make a purchase I may get a small thank you from his company.

The reason I tell you this is to be completely transparent and so you know I COMPLETELY believe in these programs or I wouldn’t refer them to you.

Click Here To Register For Free Zero To MultiMillionaire Webinar

SO I’ll ask it again? Do you know the difference between someone who is “earning a living” vs. someone who has “created wealth“?

The person who has created wealth is not any smarter, wiser, or born with special talents. Nope, not at all!

They weren’t chosen at birth and they definitely don’t need to be born with money. If  they were all born rich you wouldn’t hear all the amazing “rags to riches” stories.

Again, Nope! Not smarter or born rich. It’s because they know specific principles and strategies that put them in the POSITION to actually create wealth!  What most other people actually do is prevent it.

Which is why T. Harv Eker, #1 New York Times bestselling author, created a brand NEW web class to reveal the 6 specific principles that make the difference between getting rich and staying middle class or broke.

And you can register for FREE by clicking here  and reserve your seat. I did this program and I know you will absolutely benefit from doing it too. In fact, I have spent a lot of money with Harv.

Here are just a few things Harv will uncover during his May 2nd class:

  • The myth of “multiple streams of income” and why it could destroy you vs. help you
  • How to identify and eliminate 3 “success killing” mistakes almost everyone makes
  • His single biggest regret (this cost him 11 years of extra struggle) and how you can avoid it
  • Why the “right” vehicle is not the most important key to creating massive success
  • The reason 80% of businesses fail within the first 3 years and how you can skyrocket your business right from day 1
  • A single strategy that will multiply your wealth by TENFOLD
  • A five letter characteristic you MUST develop in order to be successful
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To Your Success,
Rex

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Celebration, Creating The Future, Getting Over The Past, Learning

REMINDER! YEAR END SALE ENDS SOON!!

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BARE BONES SALE FOR HOLIDAYS!! EXTENDED! ENDS Jan. 2, 2017

ORDER TODAY!

Dear Friends and Readers,

BECAUSE YOU ASKED I decided to extend my offer on some of my time honored, tried and true, proven, personal development products at this time!

Use the the link below. Since my new site is still under construction it will take you to an older page of mine. I decided to make these products available for you at the prices they were back then.

It’s incredible value! The products are excellent! They work when you put them to use.  http://amazingrex.com/order.htm

Because of how former sites were developed and the software used it has been a laborious process attempting to gain access or extract data from the different software.  So this is how I am offering this.

Read on!

Best Wises For A Fabulous Year End And Beginning!

Rex

My Bare Bones Sale For Holidays!! ORDER TODAY

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‘How To Get People To Do What ‘ Home Study Program
This is a must have program if you deal with humans. Listen and Learn. Recorded live during training. Excellent for getting along better with others professionally and personally. Comes with manual and 14 mp3s. A true favorite!

‘Attitude Activator’ mp3 format. Change you attitude and you change what you are capable of. People have loved this audio for many years because of its versatility. If you want to make personal changes this audio program is for you! Comes with instructions and 13 mp3s A best seller!

‘You Can Read Minds Too’ pdf. How to connect with people and understand them better. Develop your intuition. Lot’s of exercises. You will learn how to better communicate, read people and develop your intuition.
– 114 pages of critical information everyone needs on overcoming obstacles, creating rapport, goal setting, affirmations, Directed Questions, visualization, meditation, intuition and so much more!

Get one, two or all three as a bundle. Great for you. Wonderful as gift.

All – bare bones – cut to the chase. No fancy packaging. Just top of the line information and change technology! All digital delivery.

More information is available at this web page – None of the products will ship. These are now digital products. That is an old page that will be updated.

2016 has been astounding! 2017 will be even more incredible!!

For the holidays I am keeping the prices the same as they were when that page was active. The bundle is an absolute steal! Order today.

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Get one, two or all three. Great for you. Wonderful as gift.

There you have it!  All – bare bones – cut to the chase. The products are simple. Mp3s and pdfs.No fancy packaging. Just top of the line information and change technology. All products are digital delivery.

That is it. No heavy marketing. I was going to include testimonials but decided to just leave it simple. Either you want it or you don’t. You can read about these special products at on the web page.

This is my intellectual property (IP) and copyrighted  by me. I ask that you be respectful and not copy, share, duplicate (without expressed written permission) or in any other way pirate these materials.

More information is available at this web page – None of the products will ship. These are all now digital products. Products will be emailed to you. This is an old page that will be updated. Note that the terms and conditions apply as specified on the product page.

For the holidays I am keeping the prices the same as they were when that page was active. Order today. Just Click The Order Link Below.

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Plus, I have a number of new training programs I am offering. I continue to do live events here and possibly where you are. Sponsorship is always an option.

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Plus, personal coaching is available. Email me or leave comment with your email address,

To Order Programs – Click The Order Link Today. Ends 12/23/16

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Act As If, Attitude, Confidence, Creating The Future, Creator, Emotions, Focus, Getting Over The Past, Habit Formation, Happiness, Mental Movie Theater, Neuro Linguistic Programming, NLP, Overcoming Difficulty, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Rehearsal And Practice, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Self Talk, Success, Unlimited Power, Visualization

Use This Powerful Way To Keep From Losing It

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movie-theatre

“Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be able to change a moment of difficulty into a less difficult moment? If you could take a stressful situation and de-stress it would you like to be able to do that? There are ways to alter what is happening so that the outcome you get is positive instead of negative.

In this follow up blog post I’ll share with you a method. If you haven’t read the previous blog post go back and read that first. IF YOU HAVEN’T practiced what I shared with you last time spend some time doing that prior to adding in these steps. You want to build a house on a strong foundation so that it stands.

You want to build your abilities the same way. Before, anything else get used to looking for positive past experiences and re-living them. Hopefully, you have started building a library of positive resources. You have also practiced creating the future by imagining that resourceful you in times when you want to be more resourceful.

If you are a regular reader of my blog you know only a day has gone by.  Keep in mind there is no rush. Practice the first part until you are facile with it. Then you can add this in. This information you read now can wait while you gain experience in the other first, but you will know the direction we are headed.

As I mentioned in the previous blog, read through this a number of times to familiarize yourself with the process. Once you get the idea of it  you can do it while reading through it, or better, as I suggested you can record parts of the process and play them back slowly while you go though it. You will lead yourself through it so be sure to give yourself enough time to do everything thoroughly if you record it.

Build Skills Bit By Bit. Only Move From One Skill On After Getting Good At It

Practice what I share with you in this blog. You can do it easily in the privacy of your own home. In a short while you will notice yourself responding even more productively and positively and your life changing for the better.

Continue to make the positive changes utilizing your Inner Mental Movie Theater. Are you ready and eager to learn more? I’m going to give you some today and then more in subsequent blogs.

Determine How You’d Like To Be And Feel And Behave (Respond) In Difficult Or Less Than Glorious Situations

AT FIRST, pick a mild situation to begin. You can get to the tougher ones later. Start with easier ones while you learn the to go through this process. I mean this! Work your way up from easiest to the toughest in time. Over a period of days or weeks. Get good at the process before trying it on tougher times. Crawl before you walk!

Pick A Mild Situation To Begin With

There are times when you are simply less than glorious. Sometimes you aren’t thinking positively, you’re feeling down or upset, just not optimal.

Choose one to work with. Just one experience at a time. Be specific. Think, ‘I have difficulty when…’  and pick one. It may be in a particular situation, or with a particular person or there is some activity that gives you difficulty.

Find a time and or place where you could use a resource. Said differently, find a time in real life when you could use thinking and behaving more resourcefully.

There are moments in life when things can go any which way but instead of going how we want them to go they end up less than glorious. We loose our cool, we get frustrated or angry, we give in or give up, we cry, we shout, we say things we didn’t mean.

Instead of keeping our cool and being calm or confident we get stressed, harried, fearful or worried.

You most probably have had moments like that in the past. Pick a specific one. Chose a milder one to begin with, remember. Choose an easy one! I mean this! Crawl before you walk! Keep this in mind.

Then go back to my statement above, determine how you’d like to be and feel and behave in this situation instead of how you did in the situation. Consider what would be a more productive, positive way to behave instead of how you used to behave.

Any Resource Is Better Than No Resource

You can pick a specific resource for the situation because you think it would be better. For example, you weren’t confident and you wished you had confidence. That can make it better, yes.

That could be a good resource to have in that situation. Perhaps. A sense of humor might be a good resource to have as well.  Perhaps, having the ability to laugh or be silly at that moment would have made it better. Anything is possible. Any resources can transform.

Maybe being patience, or happy or calm or curious would have been better. Curiosity, can be a great resource! The point is there is the resource we THINK would make it better when, in fact, almost any resource would have made it better. This is what is so cool!

It would not have been the difficulty it was and you would have gotten a different outcome if you’d had any number of resources available. Do you get that? There are numerous possibilities! The only limitations we have are the ones we allow. We are really only limited by what we can’t yet consider an asset or opportunity.

Had you moved into ANY other positive state than the less than glorious one you ended up with, it would led to a different outcome. Right? You understand that, don’t you?  If not think about it a bit. However the situation played out, any positive resource would have made it different and somewhat better. Maybe completely better!

If it is somewhat better, that is better! So any positive new resource is better than no resource. It is NOT a matter of trying to find the ultimate, perfect resource it is a matter of choosing any resource that will lead you to a more productive outcome and get you more positive results. Do you understand this? Again, if not think about it.

Find A Positive Resource 

Be free with your thinking in choosing new opportunities. Don’t be rigid, be relaxed. Open yourself up to infinite possibilities. You are still only going to choose one, or in time, a few, but you have a wide variety to choose from that will make a difference for you. At first, choose ONE to work with.

Learn and practice being more resourceful in a variety of ways. There isn’t a perfect way. There is not only one way. There are a variety of positive possibilities and you can learn and benefit from. Any one of them can lead to more glorious possibilities.

If you want to feel better you want to get feedback on how you can continue to transform your experiences for your benefit. So stay open minded and be willing to playfully explore.

Keep Light And Have Fun With This

Take it slowly and have fun. Be gentle and have fun. Be deliberate and thorough and have fun. Choose mild difficulties at first and have fun. Later move on to more difficult situations and have fun.

When you have learned and practiced and gotten good with the process you move onto larger issues in time. You still have fun because that is what you build into the process. Take it lightly even when dealing with more difficult issues.

There are those times that present us with difficulty. We didn’t behave as we knew we could, or wished we would. We want to take those less than glorious moments and transform them by adding in resources we didn’t utilize or were aware we had at the time.

We want to re-code our memories of the past to be more resourceful so we can choose to use them as resources in the present and  future. That is why we spend time building and continuing to build our library of resourcefulness.

A Most Important Benefit Is You Become What You Think About

The reason why I want you to go and find all your positive times and relive those and catalog those and have experience recreating those is for you to have them available as choices whenever you may need to.

If you spend a large portion of your time devoted to finding resources and living them and creating them it makes you more resourceful. Your life will change for the better.

Utilize Any Of These Resources When Times Get Tough

A second benefit is you can utilize any of these resources more readily when times get rough if you have wired them in and made them automatic and available. What you think about you become. When you become more resourceful you can handle future difficult times better. Do you get how this works? It builds on itself.

There are times when everything goes your way. Maybe you feel on top of the world, or extra joyful. These are resources!

You got some news and you feel very happy. There are times when you simply feel fine, but more than fine. Super fine. YOU feel GOOD but not like a superhero. There are times when you feel confident, capable, certain you can do anything. Other times you feel silly or you have a sense of humor.

Still, at other times you feel relaxed, calm, peaceful or at ease. Sometimes you are concentrated and focused, sometimes playful. At times you are focused on your needs at other times you are attentive and helpful to others. All these constitute useful resources.

Re-live It: Feel Now What You Felt Then

Go back inside your mental movie theater and re-live some of these one at a time. Notice  what you saw at the time, what you heard and felt that made you feel that way.

Get a sense of it as much as possible ! You can even imagine feeling it at 2, or 3 or even 5 times the intensity. You can ramp it up. Re-live it from your point of view.

Build them one by one by revisiting these memories again and again.

Watch It: Feel How Good It Feels To Be This Way (Selfie)

Imagine the other way too. See yourself in the situation (selfie) looking the way you do when you are resourceful in this fashion. How do you look, how do you use your body and move.  What does your voice sound like. You can see that you (in the movie) feels great.

Feel how incredible you would feel to be this way. If everything for your future you was going right, and you were everything you wanted to be, doing what you wanted to be doing and having what you wanted to have. How would you feel? Feel that!

Enjoy these. Do this each day. Build a library of incredible feelings, talents, abilities, and resources. Let’s call them resources states.

Practice each day. Realize that whenever you remember these positive times you can feel the wonderful feelings again and again even stronger if you’d like. Strong or not isn’t the point. The point is taking time to live and feel these resources.

You Can Access or Build Past, Present And Future Resources

In order to change your response in the future you want to have one or more of these resources available when you need it. You are going to use your mental movie theater to imagine when and where and with whom you may need one or more of them.

Pay attention to what and how you behave and feel differently when you add the new resources in. First we will change the past.

Go to your mental movie theater and take up a comfortable seat. Watch this experience on your movie screen in your mind.

You are sitting in a movie theater and the screen is over there. The movie begins and you watch yourself go through the experience over there UP UNTIL the point, but not beyond, when it became a difficult situation.

You Are The Director And Editor Of Your Inner Movies

You chose a mild one because you want to be able to STOP IT from being a difficulty. You want to change the difficult moment so it no longer affects you. You want to be free so you want to stop it easily from being  an issue. You are going to work as a movie editor.

Watch yourself over there on your mental movie screen in a situation leading to a less than glorious outcome. One you actually experienced in your real life past. Watch it up to, but not beyond, when it started going awry. STOP IT prior to when you behaved as you DO NOT WANT to. As it approaches slow it down and stop it.

Cut the film right there! Edit! You snip away the less than glorious reactions you had. As an editor you would throw them in a bin on the computer or let them drop on the cutting room floor. Then insert the new resourceful behavior. Paste it in at the precise point.

Paste it in so that from the critical point on you now watch yourself behaving in the situation the way you WANT TO behave. Watch the movie continue. Look at yourself, listen and notice how you feel differently.

Now you run it again from start to finish making sure you behave as you want to until the end. It begins, you watch.  Watch the situation begin to turn sour but instead of succumbing to what was used to be YOU NOW think, feel and behave in the new positive way? Watch it again and again over and over. Re-live it and love it!

Notice how you look, what you sound like, what and how you say things to yourself in your head, under your breath or out loud. Notice how you move. Imagine it with as much detail as possible.

Adjust As Necessary

Do you like what you see? Do you like how you feel watching this new you? If it isn’t as good as you’d like it improve it. Add in another resource. Change it in positive direction until it is too your liking. Keep it realistic as you do. Intensify the positive feelings.

Adjust it. You want to behave more positively in the future make your inner mental movie a compelling example of you behaving that way. Tweak it. See how wonderful you look. Notice how you positively interact. Listen to the kind things you say to yourself (or others).

When it is how you like it – spend time reviewing it this way. Notice how it is different and more positive. Then realize that is how it can be in the future.

Whenever you watch your inner movie in this way you want to end it completely before you do it over again. So watch it to the end and then when it finishes shake it off (literally shake yourself a bit) or get up, move around, do a jumping jack. Anything that creates a shift.

Go inside and change a few other mildly difficult times this way. Pick 3, 6, 10 however many you wish. Practice recoding them. Review them with the new behaviors and how do you feel? Are you moving in the direction you want to move in? Is feeling good? Feeling great?

You are building and practicing a skill. If you keep at it you will build the habit of looking for resources whenever you encounter the trigger points in less than glorious situations. This is an incredible skill to have. So you want to practice a lot. Don’t believe me build it for yourself!

There is more to this process and we will add on to it. It gives you another powerful alternative way to accomplish the same end. It is a useful approach for you to learn. Practice and practice. You will be amazed at how easily you can make changes. More Next Time!” Rex Sikes

Have a majestic day!

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Act As If, Affirmations, Autosuggestion, Confidence, Decision, Emotions, Energy, Expectations, Focus, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Happiness, Intentional Thinking, Mental Movie Theater, Personal Development, Positive Affirmations, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Self Talk, Success, Visualization

How To Stop Brain From F’ing You Up

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you can become anyone you want to be

“Who do you imagine yourself to be? What do you say about who you are? What do you think and say and imagine about what you have done, can do, and will accomplish? What you think about you bring about! What are you thinking and saying about yourself to yourself and others throughout each day of your life? Whatever it is you can bet you are fulfilling it.

If you want to make permanent, positive changes, easily, then you need to work with the system. What you have been affirming all your life may be the reason you have been stuck. Those limiting ‘I’ statements we say to ourselves and others keep us the same. What you hold in your head you will hold in your hand!

Thanks for joining me for Part 2. Continued From Previous Post: If Your Computer Is Sabotaging You; Fix It!

See Yourself As You Wish To Be ‘As If’ You Already Are

Maltz suggested we spend time each day visualizing ourselves as we wish to be. He had specific recommendations that included imaging our goals as already complete. See ourselves as we would be if we right now had those changes. We should visualize ourselves as having already made the changes we want to make. We should see the end result.

Imagine your life and actions in as much detail as possible, as it would be, if you were precisely the way you hope you will be. Imagine it ‘as if’ the change has already been made and you are living as you hope to. Inside your head, live, think and act as if that future you is right now.

I have shared with you previous blogs why this works. The brain can’t tell the difference between an imagined image and a real one on the outside. I have shared with you the research. It would be well worth it to go back through my blogs and re-read as many as you can. Study these principles and practices daily and you will make your dreams come true!

Spend time imagining what you want each day, morning and night. Imagine it as already accomplished and enjoy the feelings that accompany this. These wonderful, powerful feelings combined with the new imagery informs the unconscious, our subconscious servo mechanism (servant mind,) that THIS is what we want.

Maltz, leaders of the New Thought Movement, ancient philosophers and practitioners also prescribed this. While this may be new to you or some people today, it has been around working forever. The sad truth is that few apply it. I hope you won’t be one to pass up having everything you want in life for the reasons we are discussing here.

Earl NIghtengale referred to it as ‘the strangest secret’ because as he pointed out, it is not secret at all. These working principles are well known but few ever apply them. That secret is: you become what you think about most during your day and night. The secret is hidden in plain view.

Strong, Intense Emotions Run The Show

Visualization, combined with intense positive emotion, repeated again and again brings about the change. You must be consistent and persistent and not waiver or give up. We bring about what we think about. The more passionate, the greater the desire, the more intense the feelings the stronger the message signal.

I have shared how our less than glorious emotions run the show because of their intensity. When we are angry, raging, fearful or sad, when we worry and doubt these bring us more of the same because what we focus on we get back.

Powerful emotions drive the subconscious. Powerful emotions combined with what we focus on, whether we focus intentionally on what we want, or unintentionally on what we don’t want, cause us to get back more of the same. The signal value is high. This is the language the subconscious understand and replicates. The language IS powerful emotions combined with images in our head.

The subconscious only knows to give you more of the same. Whatever you are feeding it the subconscious gives back. Positive or negative. Wanted or unwanted.The key to getting what you want is intention. You intend to get positive results BY focusing on what you want and enhancing your positive thoughts and feelings! The more you feel good as you think about yourself now and in the future the more that is the present and future you get back.

Imagine how you want to be, feel, do and what you want to have as if it has already come true. This is important because if you imagine it in the future, out there, it will stay in the future. Someday never comes. Our subconscious works to make it happen as we imagine it. FEEL IT FULLY! Embrace the positive feelings.

Since we can’t imagine every detail, I like to include a disclaimer that I think and repeat. ‘this or something better’ because I am completely into being happily surprised. By repeating it over and over in your inner movie theater combined with strong positive ‘feel good’ feelings you deliver the message to the subconscious which ultimately receives the signal, the message and acts on it.

Change Your Self Image And You Can Change Your Habits

In this manner you develop the habits and behaviors in alignment with your new self image. The results of intentional visualization combined with strong intense positive feelings repeated over and over is the message, you want, gets through through to the subconscious and we then begin to think, feel and behave consistent with our new self imagine.

As you begin to change the inner image you speak to yourself more positively. Your self-talk becomes nicer and more inspiring. You begin to think in terms of yourself as an ‘I can learn to do anything’ type of person.

You become a ‘can do’ person. You learn you can change anything inside you AND when you change the inner you – you realize you can change anything outside yourself as well. Use your self-talk wisely. Speak only to bless, heal and prosper. Stop blaming and criticizing and making excuses for yourself.

You’ll see new advantages and opportunities you may have missed before. You become alert to them because now you see in new ways. The inside changes first. You make new connections and form new neural pathways. You are evolving your brain and yourself.

Your self image determines what you become. The outer matches the inner.  If your inner world is impoverished your outer world will be too. If your inner world sucks the results you get will suck as well. It takes a wake up call to change.

Sometimes, you just get sick and tired of being sick and tired. Sometimes, it is a large upheaval in a person’s life that causes the individual to snap into ‘I have to change’ mode. Sometimes, it is just a review of what your life has been or is like.

As Above So Below; As Within So Without

If your outer circumstances suck change your inner world! Change what you have been doing and you will begin to notice things in your life changing. Begin from within. Change your inner vision and you will change your world as you see yourself.

As you become a new person within the outer world conforms to your self image of yourself. You fix the outer world by first fixing the inner world.

Self Image and habits go together. Change your Self Image and your behaviors change to be consistent with the new you. As you repeat the new behaviors they become new positive habits. As you develop the new positive habits you become more confident and competent and this reinforces the new positive Self Image. You really do evolve yourself!

If you don’t see yourself happy, wealthy or successful you won’t ever develop those behaviors as long as you don’t see it. However, as you being to see yourself as happy, wealthy and successful and you feel it within and you believe it; and you move through the world with these thoughts and feelings you begin to behave in happier, healthier, wealthier and more successful ways.

You bring about the outer change by having changed the inner. Maltz, Hill, Wattles, and so many others before them, and since them encourage you to make yourself and your life what you want it to be. No one can do it for you. You may have adopted the image of yourself and the beliefs you grew up with from others but you don’t have to keep any you don’t want. Those have brought you to today!

Today, the decision is yours. Only you can improve your own Self Image. Only you can make your mind, your thoughts and your imagination work for you. End the limitations, learn to be free. Enjoy a new day and a new life when you decided to take charge. Update the computer and get it working for you automatically instead of against you!” Rex Sikes

Thrill yourself with all good things!

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Acceptance, Affirmations, Attitude, Blessings, Celebration, Emotions, Focus, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Happiness, Learning, Overcoming Difficulty, Persistence, Positive Thinking, Responsibility

Do This When Frustrated, Angry or Feeling Bad!

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worry takes away today's peace

“How can you tell if you are focused on what you don’t want or what you do want? It is actually easy. Your have a signaling system that you can use. It alerts you when you are on or off track. You only need to learn how to recognize it to use it. It requires is becoming aware.

Your Feelings Are Your Signal System

If you are frustrated it is a signal you are focused on what you do not want. Negative emotion is the signal you are focused on what you don’t want. When you are feeling good and have positive emotions it is a signal you are focused on what you want.

Negative emotion only means you are thinking about what you do not want. Whatever you are thinking about mostly is what you get more of. You create the conditions of your life experience. You manifest more of the same. What you think about you become.

If you are frustrated, angry, depressed, anxious, worried, fearful, blaming and accusing, whining and complaining you are spending time and energy in a less than glorious place. The feelings that cause you to blame or complain are the signal.

If you catch yourself criticizing and speaking poorly about self, others, events and situations that is a signal. A clue you are focused in less than productive ways on what you do not want.

Once you become aware you are feeling negative, feeling frustrated, and you don’t like feeling that way you can do two things. First, you can get more frustrated, and more angry, you can get more intensely negative to the point where you think and say and commit to yourself,  ‘never again!’ You can ramp it up and get to that ‘this is the last straw’ point. From this point you can make changes you need to.

That is one way of dealing with it. It can and does occur naturally for people. They just get to the point where they know they have to change. That intense emotion is fine as long as it serves to take them to a place where they stop focusing on the negative and begin focusing on the positive.

The negative feelings are the signal you are not focusing on what you want. However, if you don’t change your focus to what you do want you won’t have the relief or get the results you hope for. You must wake up, pay attention to the signal and change what you are doing.

You must switch your attention. THAT IS WHAT your feelings have been trying to get you to do. You feelings are trying to GET YOUR ATTENTION enough for you to notice so you can SWITCH!

Remember, if you always do what you always did you always get what you always got. It is an opportunity to be productively different.

Clarify What You Do Want

Use the powerful negative feelings to figure out what it is you do want. Stop focusing on the negative and start focusing on the positive. Commit to staying focused on the positive. Whenever you feel negative there is an adjustment you should make. That IS the signal you are off course.

You have an internal guidance system. You have an internal GPS. You have a system designed to be self correcting. The unwanted thoughts and feelings inform you that you are off course. Don’t fight them, celebrate when you recognize the signal and make the necessary changes. Less than glorious means time to change!

Some people have spent so many years ignoring or fighting and pushing down and repressing their feelings they have difficulty telling when they are feeling good or  less than glorious. Still, you can learn to pay attention and benefit from this internal guidance bit by bit, Awareness is your key! It may be more subtle but you can do it.

Commit to paying attention. Do a self inventory frequently though out the day by asking ‘how am I feeling’ . Take a moment to evaluate and be honest. It is useful  to color chart your feelings using crayon or markers to indicate the changes during the day.

Notice predominant colors and notice how frequently you actually fluctuate. This is a great learning tool Give it a shot and you may surprise yourself.

You can ask someone  to assist you by pointing out when you are acting in certain ways. Just don’t bite their head off when they help. The goal is to become aware when you are feeling less than glorious so you can change direction.

Second, Make Incremental Change

You change from bad to a little bit better. Step by step. The goal is to feel a bit better. Actually, the goal is to feel the best you can most of the time, but if you are intensely down or angry going from that place to joyous is too big a leap.

Going from angry to frustrated is a smaller step and a worthwhile one. You are learning to lessen the anger and move away from it.

People either get frustrated and then angry or they can get angry and cool off to frustrated. It is like a gate that can move in either direction. A swinging door. So when you are really mad the goal is to cool off and begin to think of what you do want.

If you are down you want to get to a bit better place. A place more okay and begin thinking about what you do want. If you are depressed you may want to get frustrated and angry. At least, from angry you can act.

Because it is intense you create more movement. From there you can more readily change. Regardless, one needs to get to a place where ‘enough is enough’ and then make positive productive change.

What you want makes you feel good when you think about it. If when think about what you want you feel bad you aren’ t thinking about what you do want. You probably are thinking about how you don’t have what you do want.

You won’t feel good if you compare where you are to where you want to be unless you are celebrating closing the gap. If as you inch your way forward you are delighted the entire time then it is fine.

Gratitude Helps Make Everything Better

If you celebrate everything you are on the right track and you will feel better more of the time. How can you feel down and out, frustrated, angry or bored when you are thankful and happy and delighted about everything? You can’t!

Find every little thing you can to enjoy, and appreciate. The more you find the better you will feel.

Once you make gratitude and celebration a daily habit you will be thinking and feeling good most of the time. You will be much closer to making your dreams come true as you live this way. Then your head and heart is clear to find more opportunity and advantages each day. You are better equipped to handle obstacles, and disappointment. You are far more resilient and resourceful!

When you live in gratitude and celebration everything is incredible and getting better at the same time. It is one of the wisest and most powerful choices you can make. Celebrate everything, even the tough stuff! Look for the silver lining and emphasize it. Never waste an opportunity to feel grand!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy today!

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Acceptance, Attitude, Focus, Forgiveness, Getting Over The Past, Happiness, Learning, Overcoming Difficulty, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Improvement

You Screwed Up! How To Get Over It!

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your best teacher your last mistake

“You screwed up! Big or small? It doesn’t matter. We all make mistakes. The big question is what to do when you do make a mistake? How do you keep going?

Okay, this won’t be the first time you heard this. You are human. Humans make mistakes. That is what we do. That is how we learn. From our earliest moment we are screwing up and it is informing us and teaching us.

BUT since we went to school we hate messing up. We hated those red marks on our tests. We were told everything we did wrong. SO we developed an aversion to it. We developed a fear for making mistakes.

We responded out of sorts. We don’t like it. We are afraid of it and feel bad when we screw up.

Stop Focusing On Mistakes

If we focus on what we don’t want we get more of what we don’t want. If we spend time worrying about making mistakes it is more likely we will make them.

If we think ‘don’t screw up’ it is not any different than telling a child ‘don’t spill your mill’. You know what happens when we do that.

Focus On What You Do Well

You have to live fearlessly and expect the best. You need to plan for success and not let mistakes bother you so much. You are so much more than your occasional screw up.

You do more things right than you do wrong. Celebrate that! Embrace this! Accept it! You do plenty of things well and quite well.

How We Learn

As a child you learned to roll over, sit up, crawl and eventually walk by making more movements than were necessary. These movements were way off base. They weren’t at all close to what you need to balance or move forward easily.

When you learned to feed yourself you repeatedly missed your mouth with the spoon getting food all over the place and yourself. You made movements way off base.

You never thought to call them mistakes. They were! They were necessary for you to eventually hone your skills and get the food in your mouth. They were necessary for balance, movement, navigation.

These are called Unwanted Parasitic Movements. Name sounds horrible but you needed to learn how to stop doing them in order to get the spoon to your mouth, for you to sit up, crawl and walk.

They were absolutely required. They were larger than necessary, not even closed to the refined movements you learned to make because of them. It is like coloring outside the lines. You went outside the lines while learning to color inside the lines.

You learned to eliminate all that was unnecessary in order to refine and perform these skills. You got rid of these unwanted parasitic movements to smoothly navigate the spoon to your mouth.

It was all done through repetition. It was all learning. It was all ‘not that way but this way’ when it came to aiming your arm and hand to your mouth.

When you watch an infant sit notice how much it moves as it is learning to sit comfortably still. The infant is learning to balance from all these extraneous movements.

Good thing you couldn’t talk or think about it as you do now, you’d have quit after the first or second try, starved to death and would not be reading this blog.

Accept Mistakes As Part Of Being Human

Mistakes are part of evolving, growing, developing. If you deny making them or get caught up in thinking about them, over thinking about them or worrying about them you will only be miserable.

You will stagnate and prevent yourself from learning valuable lessons. You will make it tougher on yourself. Pat yourself on the back when you make a mistake and say to yourself, ‘You did the best you could. Better luck next time’.

Realize we all make them and they are a part of life. Embrace yourself, forgive yourself. Embrace your mistakes, forgive yourself for making them. It is absolutely ok.

Yes, there may be consequences and you may need to make restitution for your mistakes that should be understood. That is part of the process.

Don’t shirk your responsibility when a mistake affects others. Ask forgiveness do what you can to rectify it. Be positive and proactive. Do not let it ruin you. Make good on it and get over it.

Mistakes Make You More Attractive

People like people more who are able to forgive themselves and admit their mistakes. It actually makes them more attractive. There is the story of a popular television entertainer who was supposed to run up a flight of stairs during his TV special.

He stumbled and fell. The producers said, ‘don’t worry we can edit it out’. He said ‘leave it in’. He understood that it would make him more human and that the audience would feel for and pull for him seeing him falter but continue to go on. And he was right!

Happy people know this inside. They know that making a mistake is actually a learning experience and an opportunity. Since we all make them and it is probable we will continue to make them the best approach seems to be relaxed acceptance.

Don’t get bent out of shape. Keep moving forward. The more you can celebrate mistakes the less the sting. When you are able to embrace and accept, acknowledge, learn and move on your life takes on a much more wonderful quality.

When you give yourself permission to screw up or fail it takes the sting out of it. You will find yourself hurting less and feeling better more frequently. Attitude is important. It makes all the difference in the world. Keep on making mistakes and keep on learning and growing!” Rex Sikes

Have a wonderful day!

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Acceptance, Attitude, Curiosity, Decision

How To Stop Being An Ass And Keep An Open Mind

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3d-open-mind-person-28913823

“Keep an open mind. You hear about this frequently. You are told to have it, or acquire it, or maintain it. Some people even think they possess one. Do they? Do you? How can you tell when you are open to new ideas or when you shut down?

Do you jump or rush to conclusions? Do you believe there is a right answer to the problem? Do you believe there is only one correct solution to any given situation? Are things cut and dried, black or white, right or wrong? Do you grab onto the first thing that you hear about, or that enters your mind, and establish it as a fact?

Symptoms Of A Closed Mind

When you have a closed mind it is easy to pass judgement. You tend to lock onto things and argue your points or refuse to let go and see that other possibilities exist. Everyone else is wrong! You know it and you can tell. There ought to be  a law for goodness sakes!

My definition is simply: Contempt for a new idea prior to examination is a sign of a closed mind.

Many people dismiss out of hand an idea without exploring the merits of the idea simply because it does not fit their existing gestalt or mindset. To quickly refuse to even examine another point of view is a sign that the door to the mind is definitely shut.

What To Do About It

Explore! I always say exploration is the doorway to adventure. Be willing to journey elsewhere in your mind to discover what is possible. You can do this without even leaving where you are at. Simply decide to explore an idea or a  concept, and research it. Read about it, examine it while keeping as open minded as possible.

When the tendency to shut down arises, you stop it. When you begin to think this is BS stop it! Hold it in check. Determine to see it all the way through prior to labeling it as bunk. It requires discipline, especially if you are quick to make judgements, but hang in there.

Sometime you habitually shut down so fast it is instantaneous. When you become aware that you are being closed minded and that you have already shut the door, open it back up. It may be difficult but do it anyway. The more you open it back up the better you get.

Awareness is the goal. You want to be able to recognize when you shut down, or are about to shut down so you can do something about it. Be grateful when you become aware that you are closed minded because that is when you can begin to change it.

Ask questions. Become curious

Examine your own judgements and try to determine from where they arise. Do you base your opinions on something you saw or heard, are these from your past? Did you learn them from someone? Who else specifically that you know thinks or believes as you do? Who is it that believes these particular idea to be true?

Ask Yourself Directed Questions™

Direct your mind to positive things you can think about. Wonder in your mind how it might be better. Look for how you might enjoy the different possibilities. Ask questions that lead you into the behaviors you want to acquire or do more reliably.

How delighted will I be to discover I am able to entertain new ideas, that I otherwise might have resisted? In how many different ways am I easily and naturally able to stay open and enjoy new ideas? How soon can will I begin to enjoy the benefits of keeping an open mind and entertaining new view points? How much fun can I have in exploring new ideas and topics?

Challenge Your Own Thoughts

You can boot strap it and challenge your own thoughts. You can ask questions such as Who specifically says this is true? What makes it true? How is that possible? How might it be otherwise?

Who holds other contrary views? What realistic reasons may they have for holding their point of view? What might I be missing? Do I know everything about everything? Who died and left me god?

In other words, be willing to look for and find other authorities who may have very valid reasons for holding these new ideas. By the way, the ideas may be ancient they may only be new to you. OR they may be brand new ideas. Challenge your own infallibility. This is important.

None Of Us Enjoy Being Wrong

We seek to be consistent in our beliefs. We do not like it when ideology conflicts. So we dismiss it before given it the time it is due. You need to ask yourself whether you view point is accurate 100% of the time.

You can ask, ‘Always? In every single circumstance? Is it true for everyone, everywhere in the world through all time?’ OR ‘Never? Has there never been a single example of it being otherwise? Nobody in the entire world for all time never ever felt differently?’

You might ask, What causes you to think this way? What examples, evidence or experiences  do you have for maintaining this point of view? Are their reasons from your past why it is important for you to maintain this position?

What would happen, or be the worst that would happen if you didn’t think this? What would happen if you held the other person’s point of view? How would you, or the world change if you didn’t believe this? Is it possible there are other points of view?

Apply The 100% Test

If something isn’t true 100% of the time why limit yourself? If you don’t have a monopoly on the truth why act as if you do? Let some of these things go. Learn something new. If you aren’t god why act like it? Broaden your horizons. Educate yourself in new ways of thinking and being. Examine things from different perspectives or points of view.

If it isn’t true for all time and all people in all places there are things to learn. Learn about different cultures and practices in different places and times. Expose yourself to new thought and new ways to think and be. Reflect on how it is possible for people to believe and think different things.

Listen

Listen to listen. Listen to undertand. Listen to Learn. Listen without speaking or challenging or arguing. Listen for no reason at all except to better understand and appreciate the speaker and her point of view. Too many of us are only waiting our turn while listening. We are waiting to speak and make our points rather than to reflect on and understand his points.

Ask questions to understand not to counter argue. Ask for clarification. State back in their words what you understand the person to have said and listen to the other person clarify it for you. Determine if you understood what they meant.

Hear it. Pay attention. Seek understanding. This means you are active in the process. You are accepting and open and available and interested in their point of view.

Sometimes when listening this way and they are finished do nothing but accept it. Don’t provide your views. Sit with it. Let them be heard. Appreciate the other person and their point of view without making your points. Silence at times is golden. At other times share and contribute.

Meditation

Mediation is great for helping to keep an open mind. Especially beneficial are those forms of mediation where you watch thoughts come and go without attaching to any of them. When you are able to be quiet and simply witness thoughts arising you can become free of them. You can become open to many new awarenesses.

The Benefits Of An Open Mind

When you are able to view many options simultaneously without closing down an entire new world of possibilities opens up to you. The world becomes more alive and so do you. Everything is more colorful and flavorful.

You have more choices. There are more options. You discover there is more to enjoy than you previously allowed.

You can begin to think outside the box. You become free. You are freed of the weight of thinking you know all the answers. Nothing keeps people back as much as not considering alternatives. When the mind snaps shut you close off to opportunities and advantages that may be beneficial to you.  Literally, you are not able to see them.

You explore new territory and venture further than you could before. You not only think outside the box but you can move beyond old boundaries. Instead of stopping yourself where you used to you now give yourself permission to go further. The further you go the more you are able to see.

You open up to more fun because you are willing to entertain new ideas and try new things. You can play more, experiment and enjoy discovering. Life does become an adventure when you are willing to explore. You may even try new foods, clothes and places to go. Who knows?

When your mind is flexible you are better equipped to examine options and find solutions to problems. After all, there are many ways to bake a cake, cook an egg, make a bed. There are many roads to Rome. Lot’s of ways to dive into a pool…

You don’t get stuck trying the same thing over and over again hoping for a different result. Your thinking expands and your world expands. More flexibility means more options. More options means more solutions. More solutions means greater possibilities!

Change happens. You change! When you are open, exploring and having fun you can change your thoughts to serve you better. Your thoughts and beliefs must change first if you want to change your behaviors and keep the changes. You can think better, feel better and learn to develop positive new habits.

As you change you become filled with more positive energy. You become more alive. More affirming. You become more tolerant and accepting. You include more into your world. We become freer and lighter and have more physical energy when we are not resisting and trying to maintain everything. Your thoughts are positive so is your energy.

You are less negative, more tolerant, having more fun and more fun loving. You can enjoy better health, better relationships with family and friends and associates. You can devote more time to that which is truly important. There is far less to argue about and divide you from others. You may become more loving and have a greater ability to be loved because you let go and accept others for who they are.

When we let go of how others and the world is wrong; when we drop intolerance for positions other than are own; when we are able to embrace new ideas and people and include more in are life incredible things happen. We find more friends and fellowship.

When we get entrenched and spend out energy defending our positions we are wasting energy. It isn’t worth it. Instead, we conserve and direct our energy, we focus it in beneficial ways.

We can all point to someone we think is closed minded. Don’t be just like that person! Be open. Accept and embrace that person and allow that person to be who s/he is.

If that person never comes around to your way of thinking so what? What is the worst that can happen? Can you love and accept that person anyways? Go on give it a try! And while you are at it love, accept and embrace yourself!” Rex Sikes

Imagine how wonderful today can be!

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Act As If, Affirmations, Beliefs, Creating The Future, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Habit Formation, Happiness, Learning, Positive Thinking, Rehearsal And Practice, Self Talk, Success, Unlimited Power, Visualization

Success And Happiness: Are You Doing What Helps Or Hurts?

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your mind is a garden

“Are you predominantly focused on what you want, thereby creating what you want in your life? OR  Are you predominantly focused on what you don’t want, thereby inadvertently, creating what you do not want? Since we get what we focus on this is important to know. What do you imagine when you imagine your dreams and goals?

You have to know what you want

You have to know what you want and not just know what you don’t want IN ORDER for you to get what you DO want. Knowing what you do not want (I don’t want to be poor; I don’t want this illness; I don’t want people who lie to me etc) is important to help clarify what you do want. (I want to be wealthy; I want vibrant health; I want people who are honest and I can trust etc).

The key is to focus on what you do want so that is what you create for yourself. Once you catch yourself focused on what you don’t want (uggg I hate these bills! etc) turn your attention away from what you don’t want and put it on what you do want. Remember, we get what we focus on.

When I first began practicing visualizing as a child I had difficulty seeing myself as I wanted to be inside my head. I could quite easily picture something bad happening (falling off my bicycle, for example) but had difficulty imagining myself riding it safely. That was just what I was used to doing in my head.

Because I didn’t undertake to change this and exercise my mind regularly then, as one would with daily physical exercise, this ‘condition’ persisted until my later teens when finally I decided I needed to do something. By then, I had spent many years practicing visualizing how I did not want to be. It was already my habit from younger years.

How to practice and develop skill

I sat and practiced seeing good things happening. It seemed tough at first. Vague, hazy, unclear, unfocused. Sometimes nothing at all. BUT I could pretty well and pretty clearly see what I didn’t want. That was a well developed skill. I had to continue to practice again and again making pictures of what I wanted. At times it was frustrating, I admit. You have to keep at it. I certainly had to.

To help, I would look at photographs of things I wanted or of people doing things I wanted to be able to do and close my eyes and imagine as best I could myself with those items or in place of the people in the photograph. Just as in building any other skill set I needed regular correct repetition to develop my ability to visualize positively. Slowly at first, bit by bit, I got somewhat better.

All of us. You and I can create the life we want. We can learn to develop any skill or ability we want to add, or enhance any skill and talent we already have by dedicating enough time and practice to do so. Learning how to visualize powerfully and positively is a skill worth having. It is our doorway to making our dreams come true.

There may be no other skill more important that our own ability to focus our mind’s attention on what we want to be, do or have since we become what we predominantly think about. Take time to nurture your ability to visualize and be sure to be focusing on what you want to have more of.

Visualizing positively may be your most powerful resource!

We are already creating our world, if you don’t like what you are getting then you must change what you are doing. I had to. The first step in the process of getting what I wanted was to recognize that I was already great at getting and having what I did not want.

This actually was good news. Life kind of sucked but when I realized I was the one powerfully creating everything I didn’t want, I knew, all I had to do was make a switch. I would keep on creating since that is what we all do, but I would deliberately, consciously with full intention chose to focus on what I wanted instead.

That was liberating! That was the instance everything began to shift. Yes, many times daily I had to re-position my focus from what I habitually, already did, (think about what I didn’t want) TO think about what I did want. Again and again and again I had to shift.

Eventually, in time, it grew easier and easier. Soon it became more of a regular habit. Change becomes easier when you decide you have had enough and want something else.  There are other exercises I will share in future blog posts that will accelerate your abilities.

Correct repeated practice enables you to acquire any skill

You can be, do and have anything you want when you learn how. It is far easier and more readily available than you might even realize it is right now. Practice seeing what you want. Become aware of your thoughts and images. Focus on what you want and your life will become so much better. What we think about we bring about!” Rex Sikes

Live gloriously today!

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Affirmations, Attitude, Autosuggestion, Creating The Future, Expectations, Faith, Habit Formation, Happiness, Learning, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Affirmations, Positive Thinking, Positive Thoughts, Rehearsal And Practice, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Self Talk, Success, Unlimited Power

What Kind Of Abundance Do You Experience PT 1

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you decide every second

“You can have anything you want in abundance. Health, love, success, money, things. Or you can have anything you don’t want in abundance. Illness, broken relationships, failure, poverty, no home or possessions. The critical question is what kind of abundance are you creating and attracting?

You will get whatever your predominate thoughts are about. You will make happen and attract whatever you think about and focus on most of the day all the days of the week. What we concentrate on occupies our mind, our attention and our energy. Our energy goes into whatever we are preoccupied with.

So if troubles; lack of money or mounting debt and bills, discord in relationships, difficult home life, career disappointment or being out of work, are what you think about most day and night you are keeping your troubles alive. Worry is negative goal setting. What you think about you bring about.

Some time ago I was doing okay. Then some bad things happened. One after the other more bad things occurred. I wondered, ‘Why all this bad luck? Everything is going wrong!’ I used a lot stronger language I can assure you. It seemed everywhere I turned it only got worse. I complained, I whined, I tried to fix it desperately but it only continued. At the height of it all, I gave up. I realized at some point I couldn’t change it as I was. I had to change me.

I made it a point to read positive inspiring material every morning first thing. I’d read a page, a chapter whatever I could make work for the day. I would do it no less than thirty days. So I began. I read and listened to inspiring audios whenever I could. Slowly during the month my mindset relaxed and my attitude began to change bit by bit. I cautiously began to apply some of the things I was reading about and learning. I felt grateful I was taking the initiative.

I vowed to stay sane and not get carried away or become one of these ‘pink’ energy bubble people I had spent so much time around and even dated in years past. I wanted solid, practical, applicable skills, thoughts, and behaviors that would transform me without me becoming doe-eyed and hugging trees.

I didn’t want to become a cosmic cosmonaut with my feet six inches off the ground. I wanted to live in the everyday world and get some relief from nagging issues I carried with me, even though I have been a life long student and proponent of personal change and development.

If I had to become a weirdo to be happy then I really wasn’t all that interested. I read things from ancient texts, I read Napoleon Hill again, some more, throughout the years. I read others, anyone and everyone, who seemed to suggest that there was and is a realistic way to make wonderful things happen without relying on mysticism and other ‘beings’ to do it for me.

What can I say. Those thirty days transformed my life. At the conclusion of the thirty I continued the practice. I do to this day. I have learned and grown and have seen and understood so much. I have much to learn and yet to understand. Life though, is so much more incredible than I could have ever imagined. I filled myself with gratitude and joy. I felt confident and successful! I felt happy!

It has nothing to do with things or accumulations it is the depth of the change within me that I value most. I can enjoy possessions in ways I never did before. I am excited and eager and enthused in ways I never was before. I live and love living. Really, about all I can say is ‘WOW’! I feel so blessed and so thankful!

I can trace back to precisely what the first incident was and then the second that made me begin to realize I needed to approach things differently. It was a very difficult time for me as things went from bad to worse. I point this out because it seems this is often the way we come to changing ourselves. Something gets so bad, or we bottom out and we say, ‘stop, no more, never again’ and we move on into new ways of thinking and being.

Every moment of life is amazing EVEN when it appears not to be. I have done some incredible things in my life and I got settled and was coasting. I began to take things for granted. It was easy to complain when things started getting tougher. I even enjoyed complaining. Except when I did complain more and more of the joy and goodness and delight drained from me. I learned to put a guard on my thought and speech.

I AM SO GLAD IT DID!!! Had I kept going as I was going I can only bet it would have sucked even more. Fortunately, some glimmer inside me, told me I had to take the driver’s seat of my own life again. I am so thrilled and happy and pleased with the journey ever since. Did the skies open up and riches rain down on me. Nope, all things take some time. Gradually, bit by bit things got better.” Rex Sikes   More In Next Post!

Have a delightful day!

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Are You Ready? When The Student Is Ready The Teacher Appears!

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old ways won't open new doors

“What makes a student ready? What makes a student? A student is one who takes interest in a particular subject, studies and learns. Then applies what one learns.

When I was a teenager, more than anything, I wanted someone who would show me the ropes in show business. A mentor. One day, by chance, I met a man. He was successful in the movie business, he had many successful proteges, and he saw something in me. He was willing to guide me for free.

He didn’t want anything in return. Truly, nothing, other than the satisfaction of seeing me make something of myself in the business I wanted to succeed in. That alone, terrified me. I was always second guessing his motives but I told him I was willing to do anything, professionally, it took to make it. I said that again and again.

So he told me what to do. He gave me the first step. ‘Oh, you don’t understand’, I’d exclaim, ‘I can’t do that.’ I would proceed to tell him why. He’d nod understandingly and explain that I could do that or do this other thing. ‘Oh no,’ I’d say, ‘I am willing to do anything but not that’. I didn’t want those lessons or could not see the value of pursuing a particular area.

Time and time again he would make suggestions. Most I would negate. Some I would try usually abandoning whatever it was he had me doing. He never complained. He completely accepted me resisting him and never threw up his hands or told me he would not continue. Our relationship lasted a number of years.

I left him eventually to find someone who could help me make it in showbiz. So what is a student? When is the student ready? A student becomes ready when the student is teachable. I was not teachable. I knew what I needed and was willing to do and not do. To say,’Yes, but’ and ‘no, you don’t understand’ and then provide reasons are really nothing but excuses. AND, pay attention here – Excuses ARE excuses and nothing else!!

The questions one has to ask oneself is ‘how teachable am I?’ Many people answer, ‘I am willing to learn anything’, but when the rubber hits the road they actually aren’t. I wasn’t. How teachable are you? How willing are you to change? How willing are you to change what you think and what you are doing to think and do something new?

Instead of being open and flexible of mind to take in NEW information and practices many people merely defend the old. That is what I did. I had all the reasons and defenses ready for why I could not or would not do or try something. If I didn’t think it would work or see the value in it I wouldn’t allow it in. I discarded it before understanding it by experiencing it. Excuses prevent new opportunities from occurring.

You cannot describe the taste of an orange to someone who has never tasted an orange. Nor can you describe the color red to the person who has never seen color. It is the experience of using the information that can be life changing. If one is not willing to apply the knowledge in order to change and get different and better results then one will remain stuck getting the same results they hope to improve. Instead of taking responsibility and becoming aware of their resistance most will simply blame others or circumstances thus insuring they remain the same.

It is the experience of tasting the orange that makes the difference. Information does not transform us. Knowing what to do and not doing it won’t make us a success. Applying what we know IS the difference that makes the difference. In order to learn, understand and apply it we first must be open to taking it in. We must not defend ourselves. We must let go of excuses and stop resisting.

People argue that what they previously learned, understood and know to be true is different from the new information they are being asked to accept. Instead of accepting the information they defend the old. They are not very teachable in that moment. In order to be ready you need to be an open vessel. I claimed to be open but was anything but. It is easy to self-deceive.

There is the story of a Master pouring a potential disciple a cup of tea. The master pours and continues to pour until the tea overflows and continues to overflow. ‘Stop!’ cries the potential student. ‘The cup is full.’ The Master replies, ‘When your cup is full you cannot add anything to it. Your cup must be empty. Go and empty your cup.’

The point should be obvious. The master deems that the student’s mind is too filled with what they already know. It is filled with too many potential objections, beliefs and resistance to be ready to learn. The student is not ready and open so is sent away. When ready the teacher appears. I was not ready. Many times I have not been ready. Just as with gardening the soil needs to be prepared and receptive to the seeds.

We need to recognize when we are listening only to speak and present our view instead of listening to gain understanding about things we don’t know about. We need to recognize when we are closed to new ideas and unable to accept information. We need to see when we resist and stop.

The way to being a good student is to recognize when we are not ready to learn and when we are ready to learn. Awareness is the key. For most of us this is a matter of ongoing management. The door is not always open. It is open and closed and open again. Then closed, and closed, then open. We need to discover when we close the door and open it to be available to new life changing information.

If we only understand the new opportunity, the new knowledge and experience, as an addition to what we already ‘think we know’ then it is just more information. Information alone won’t change us! We have to be willing to apply it. If we don’t use it we don’t know it. I ‘knew’ what to do! I was told what to do but I didn’t apply it so I didn’t get any benefit from ‘knowing’ the right things.

It is life changing when we are open and embrace it and use it. Then information, the lessons, lead us to new ways of thinking and being. Information doesn’t change us. Knowledge doesn’t change us. Only by using the knowledge can we begin to change. It is in the application of the knowledge where we learn the lessons. It’s the experience, the attempts, the defeats, the challenges that we learn from. Experience!

Seek to be open and available without judgement or analysis. You may analyze at another time but while learning it is not the time to evaluate the merit of what you are learning. You cannot fit a square peg into a round hole. The new material won’t fit into an old, already filled, container. You don’t put new wine in old wine sacks.

You can’t defend what you already know and remain open. That is not being open. That is refusing to accept! The mind is full, it is occupied it is busy and the Master cannot add any more to it BECAUSE it IS full. Some things take a very short time to learn; minutes at most but they require an entire lifetime to master. Quick to learn and a lifetime to master is the principle. Mastery comes by successfully applying the information in multiple circumstances over a duration of time. Correct repetition breeds good habits.

Learning to be open and being willing to change can take a long time to master. It is so simple it can be difficult to grasp. Stay open, be willing. We may claim we are open many times when we are not. I certainly have! Awareness is the key to change. Many times we will fall but we need to get back up and try again. Frequently, we will close the door to change while thinking we have left it open. We need to be able to notice when we shut down and resist.

A student is humble not defiant. A student is receptive. When the student is ready the teacher appears. Who is the teacher? It could be anyone and anything. It could be a life experience. It could be a formal teacher, a book or a seminar. The teacher IS whoever presents the lessons when the learner’s mind is open to receive. You can even be your own teacher at times.

No one can provide you life changing information that will make any difference whatsoever in your life until you are open and ready to receive it. They can preach it, teach it and shout it as loud and long as forever but until you are ready to hear it and embrace it the wisdom it falls on deaf ears. You have to be open and willing. You must also be willing to take the time to master the lessons. There is no substitute.

One might as well be yelling at a bunch of insects who are marching into certain destruction. They don’t know what is ahead. They can’t see it. – AND – The insects simply don’t understand the message! They don’t get the necessity of understanding it NOW! They aren’t able yet to understand you OR that you are attempting to help them! Unless you are open and teachable no teacher can teach you. It is more accurate to state a teacher presents IT IS THE LEARNER who learns. YOU either learn or you do not!

It is totally up to each of us. It is totally up to the individual student. The responsibility is 100% the student’s to be a good student. When you are a great responsible student you can learn from any source. The source may be wonderful or hardly adequate but as an incredible learner you can learn anything from anyone!

The questions one should continually ask oneself is, ‘How teachable am I?” and ‘What can I do to remain open and easily learn?’

If you are willing to learn you must be willing to change. You can’t remain the same if you want your life to be transformed. For your life to change you must change things in your life. You must change your thoughts, feelings and behaviors to get different results. If you are not willing to learn and are unwilling to change you won’t! You must also consider, ‘What is my willingness to change?’

Mindset, attitude and beliefs, your thoughts, always precede what you do and determine the results you get. If you are not pleased with the current results you are getting you must be willing to change things for you to get the results you’d prefer to get. Doing the same thing over and over again won’t get you different better results!

It is totally, and completely up to you and no one or anything else. This is the truth each of us must face. The responsibility is 100% ours alone. So, how teachable are you? How willing to change are you? Be honest with yourself. When you are ready the teacher does appear.” Rex Sikes

Have a blessed day!

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