Category Archives: Decision

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy: Are You Getting What You Don’t Want?

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“Ever have one of those moments when something happens in your life and you responded wildly by exclaiming, ‘I knew it! I knew it!’ Do you find yourself thinking, ‘Why do these things always happen to me?’ It could have been something marvelous or not so marvelous.

Are you familiar with the notion of self-fulfilling prophecy? Simply defined a self-fulfilling prophecy is a prediction that directly or indirectly causes itself to become true due to positive feedback between belief and behavior.

Put another way, the positive or negative expectations we hold about circumstances, events, or people, affect our behavior towards them in such a way that we unknowingly create situations in which those expectations are fulfilled.

You Go Where Our Thoughts Take You

In other words we cause something to happen by believing it will come true. As an educator and parent I know, the Principle Of Fulfilled Expectations, in the classroom or in life is, that people, students and children, tend to rise to the level of our expectations.

Hence, we should always believe the best about people. When we expect the best of someone they are more likely to do their best. If we expect the worst, then, don’t expect much from them. Our ‘prophecies’ have a way of coming true.

For example, the boss hires a new employee but expects the employee to be unproductive. The boss then treats the employee in a way to elicit that very response. The boss doesn’t do this consciously or on purpose. At some point the boss thinks, ‘I knew this wouldn’t work out’ and it doesn’t.

You Can’t Escape The Results Of Your Thinking

For each of us growing up, the result may be, we become something we were told we would become. For example, if you’re told you’re ignorant or stupid, poor with money and destined to fail you might grow up to be that way because you adopted those beliefs from others and you believed them.

If you don’t believe you are worthy or deserving of happiness or riches you may find that your life is always a struggle. You will prove it to stay congruent with your concept of self-worth. Your brain will do everything to keep you and life consistent with your self-image.

If deep inside, from your childhood experience or from childhood modeling and conditioning, you don’t feel deserving of everything good you will think, feel and behave in a manner consistent with that mental map or belief. Your life will reflect your inner reality.

Believing Is Seeing

Even though you may wish and want to be different you may find yourself reliving the same problems again and again. Our inner turf determines our outer turf much more the most people know or want to admit. We are responsible for everything in our lives.

Some date or marry the same partner repeatedly. It is a common issue for many. They get rid of one for a copy of the same and wonder why. ‘Why do I always date the same person’? Yes, it sucks if you have hidden agendas that hold you back from living a good life.

Consider the Law Of Attraction. You attract what you are. Perhaps, this helps put the LOA into a useful context for you and outside of the realm of airy fairy fantasy. It is scientific at its core. Our thoughts and feelings determine what we get back.

You Get What You Focus On

We live from our self-image or self-concept of our self-worth or deservedness. How could it ever be otherwise? We operate from mental maps, we co-opted as our own, from our early years and have spent our life time traveling those maps. We get good at them.

We have rehearsed them, practiced them, repeated them over and over an over again. We have thought the same negative thoughts and felt the same negative feelings wishing that we wouldn’t. Yet, we keep getting more of the same. We attract the same crap.

The good news is you can do some housecleaning and be free of limiting beliefs. You can change your self-image and self-worth and transform your life in incredible ways. You can free yourself from what has held you back and skyrocket into a fabulous future.

If  You Think You Can Or You Think You Can’t You Are Right

Awareness is the key. Turn the flashlight of your consciousness on your thoughts and verbal statements. Whenever you think or say anything less than glorious stop and change it. Gently notice when you express a limitation and rephrase it into something positive.

Replace the old habitual, chronic, negative beliefs and statements, you originally got from others anyway, when you were too helpless to do anything about it, with positive, powerful new ones. Then continuously reaffirm the new belief. Instead of ‘I can’t’ say ‘I can!’

The key to making permanent positive change is your emotions. Words have an effect but not nearly as much as our feelings. Feelings drive everything. We adopted the beliefs not so much because of the words but because of the feelings at the time.

It Isn’t Whether The Belief Is True Or Not That Is Important

Your parents or peers or teachers were angry or frustrated and you felt the same or scared when these messages were delivered. It was the fear or the frustration you felt that wired in the beliefs not simply the words. The concepts took hold because of how you felt.

When you affirm your new beliefs do them with lots of positive enthusiasm and strong emotion. Shout them, sing them, and say them enthusiastically with strong conviction. Believe them. Chant these mantras throughout the day as often as you.

Why  does repetition work?  A lie repeated enough is frequently substituted for the truth. You grow muscles by repeated exercise. You learned everything you have ever learned by repetition and  in making it habit. When you were little you heard things many times.

What Is Important – Is The Belief Supportive Of You Or Not 

You got messages about the world directly or modeled out for you, about yourself, your place in it, relationships, your worth, work, money, leisure time. Each time these were accompanied with similar emotions. The people expressing them had theirs and you had yours.

You came to believe you either are one of the people for whom anything was possible or part of those for whom it wasn’t. Some people may think good things happen but only to others, not for me. If you do, then it is time for a change. Make your life what you want!

You must be rigorous. There is a price to pay for freedom. You must use your will power and confront the negative demons but when you do you will be a victor as long as you persist. It is simple but not always easy.  Place a guard before your mind and your tongue.

Awareness Is The First Step To Permanent Positive Change

Commit! Watch your thoughts and your words. Speak only to bless heal and prosper. Be rigorous but gentle. Don’t criticize yourself when you discover less than glorious beliefs CELEBRATE you found another one you can change. Life gets better pretty quickly.

You will transform from within. It takes awareness and will power. Once aware of the limitation you must do something in order to be different. Continue to repeat the process again and  again and you will replace your negative thought habit with a new positive one.

Remember habits are reliable and automatic. Be vigilant. Be persistent. You will discover wonderful things beginning to happen when you exchange the old for the new. So get rid of what holds you back, celebrate the exchange, and enjoy the new. Be grateful.

For Life To Be Different You Must Believe And Act Differently

Be happy and hopeful and commit to being different and you will be. Once you have the new beliefs you will still engage in self-fulfilling prophecy. Only now it will be positive. Because you have improved your self-image things will work out better for you. It is so cool!

Your brain will work to keep you consistent with your new positive sense of worth and deserving. You will discover new possibilties. You will think, feel and behave in a way that attracts the right people, events and circumstances to you. That is how it works! Celebrate everything.” Rex Sikes

Have a wonderful today and inspire others!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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Don’t Be Mislead: Accepting What Is And Doing Nothing Are Not The Same!

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“There is a horrible article going around masquerading as a piece to help people. It is a truly sad and disappointing article. I understand the sentiment behind it but it is destructive, not productive.

The author states don’t dream, don’t try to be successful because you might disappoint yourself and then feel worse than if you just accept where you are at. Don’t try to be different. You don’t need to.

Don’t think positive. Don’t try to achieve. Don’t try to improve your life. If I didn’t know better I’d think this was a disguised letter from the castle telling the feudal serfs to enjoy their life as is. Settle!

Acceptance Is Having Faith That All Is Well Despite Circumstances

Accepting what IS doesn’t mean staying the same until you aren’t. Wanting something different and accepting what IS aren’t mutually exclusive. People can accept themselves and make positive changes.

It is sad. This piece that was shared a lot on social media suggests people accept defeat and accept not doing anything to improve their life or make anything better because they may be disappointed.

How disappointed might they be when they get to the end of their lives and they didn’t do anything they wanted? They simply lived as they did. They didn’t make waves and accepted their lot. Hmmmm?

Accept What Is Let Go Of What Was Have Faith In What Will Be

Enlightened acceptance is not what is proffered by this article at all. The author suggested you not read self improvement books or go to education programs that could benefit you. Because?

That is you trying to improve when you should just accept the way you are. Don’t be inspired or motivated by others who tell you you can change or have more of the good things.

It is accurate. She is correct. You don’t have to read another book or go to a seminar. You don’t have to do anything. After all, it is your choice how you spend your time, energy, and money. You decide.

Accept Who You Are Be Happy With What You Find

You have choice to pursue goals or not. You have a choice to enjoy it or not. You shouldn’t have to feel you need to do more but that is not the same thing as accepting what is. You change because you want it.

One can completely accept and appreciate the present while endeavoring to enjoy more of what life has to offer. If you aren’t expanding and increasing you are shrinking and decreasing.

Which do you want to do? You either fill up a balloon with air or let the air out of it. The same with life. You either enjoy it for all it is and  include more or you do not. Life is for living.

Once You Accept Yourself As You Are Then You Can Change

This author suggested rather than running a race and getting to the finish line it is best not to run the race at all because you might lose and then you’d feel bad about yourself. Poor thing. Awe, you lost.

I find this such sorry thinking. I saw people I know re-post the article. Don’t think you can improve because if you don’t you might be disappointed. WOW! Disappointment and discontent are valuable.

Without either, my guess is we wouldn’t have the wheel, chairs, houses, computers, fancy cars, luxury items or any modern conveniences. We wouldn’t have art or commerce.

Beautiful Thoughts Build A Beautiful Soul

We wanted more and better. We wanted innovation because we were dissatisfied. We strive and we strove to improve our lives  and our conditions because we knew we could improve on what is.

We evolve similarly to how we build muscle. We exercise. We break down the tissue and provide it rest and nutrients so it grows. Without challenge muscle would never grow.

Without dissatisfaction we would only always remain the same. Because of it we innovate. We improve. We get better. Without desire and imagination we would be animals not humans.

As A Snake Sheds Its Skin We Must Shed Our Past Repeatedly

Without yearning and dreaming where would we be? Accepting what is and doing nothing IS NOT the same thing. Accepting what is means be grateful for where you are. Appreciate everything, YES!

That doesn’t mean you must remain the same. That doesn’t mean you can’t improve on what you have. It doesn’t mean you have to but it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. It is always your choice! YOU decide.

This author’s view is not an enlightened one. It is a message of give up. Let the rich be rich you are better off where you are at, message. Don’t try to be happy you might only be sad in the end.

Don’t Exist – Live – Get Out There And Explore – Thrive

If you never try, you never grow. You will never improve. If you can’t risk anything ever you will remain the same. Many people are stuck, frozen with fear, worried about the future. It is true.

Some are stuck in the past. Re-living past tragedy and never getting over the old wounds. People are stuck in many ways. Some are stuck in ruts and feel like they can’t get ahead no matter what.

Better not do anything was the author’s message. I suggest you not listen to that message. Don’t stay the same if you don’t want to. Accept who and what you are. Celebrate it, enjoy it and enhance it.

Challenge Yourself – Evolve

If you do want a better life you have to risk not having one. BUT you can also manage the risk, take calculated risks. You can do little things to improve. Take tiny steps if you wish. It is valuable to do so.

You can smile more. You can laugh and move more. You can look around and appreciate all the beauty in the world. You can focus on the good things you find and ignore much of what isn’t.

You can do special things for yourself and others that make you feel good. You can enjoy relationships with family and friends. You can enjoy hobbies and recreation. You can delight in the day.

We Were Not Put On The Earth To Remain Stagnant

We can enjoy life. We ought not to feel as if we have to excel or feel pressured to be a success at the expense of enjoying life but one can have fun, feel good and enjoy pursuing lofty goals at the same time.

You can dream and set goals and go after them. Small or large. If you want to dream big, as many do, that is up to you. But if you never dream big you will never know what might be.

‘Might be’ isn’t a guarantee. Success isn’t handed anyone. You make your own. If you intend to be successful and do what it takes you can be. You may not be the first time you try but you can succeed.

Everything Changes – Change Is A Constant

Realize it is all up to you and take responsibility for your own success. Hey, you also get to define what success means to you. It doesn’t have to be others definition it should be your definition.

It is true you need not live the rat race. You need not live to others expectations to be happy. You should live your expectations and your life as you choose to. You do this by intentionally deciding to.

It won’t happen to you. You won’t luck into it. You make it happen. Do you have to read a book or take a seminar? NO but if those help you get what you want then they are resources. Stepping stones.

Drop By Drop The Tub Gets Filled

You determine the person you want to be and the life you want to have. You make it happen from your thoughts to your actions. You and no one else, really. Even though everything is a collaboration.

Together we all help each other in a variety of ways. We don’t live in isolation. The point is YOU set your course and you sail it. You are the captain  of your ship. Go wherever you want to go.

Don’t get to the end of your life and feel you lost out. Enjoy the relationships that are important to you. Be grateful for the love, and friendship. Be grateful for your fun and leisure. Enjoy it all now.

Treat Yourself As If You Were Your Own Best Friend

Continue to improve if that is important to you. Change, grow, expand and increase. Accept what you can’t change, learn from it and let go. Be gentle and kind with yourself and others.

Aspire to live well. Why not? You may only have this one go around, as far as we know. Don’t spend it struggling always, although are struggles are good for us, spend it thriving too. Live well and enjoy.

Find every reason to delight now and later. You can think positive or negative, you choose. You can be rich or poor, you choose. You can have fun or not, you choose. You can love or not, you choose.

It Never Gets Easier You Just Get Better

It is your choice how you live now and live later. I suggest you learn to live fabulously now so you continue to later. If you wait you will accomplish only one thing. You will wait. You won’t get you will wait.

Live in wonder and joy. Live with appreciation and gratitude. Live with passion and enthusiasm. Live with fun and delight. Include smiles and laughter, health and wealth in all areas. It is your life make it what you want it to be! Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Find whatever you can most delight in today!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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How Your Struggles Can Help You Succeed

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“Times might be tough. Perhaps, you feel like you aren’t making the progress you had hoped. Maybe, you just want to throw in the towel. Have you ever felt this way? Many do. They let their struggles stop them. When hardship continues they want to bail. Do you?

It is normal because that is what most of us learned to do growing up. It’s our habitual, chronic thinking. We lose sight of what we want when it is hard. We had hoped it would be easier. We can’t see the forest through the trees because we become fixated on problems.

We forget that it always works out for the best in the end. We don’t realize that if it hasn’t worked out yet, then it isn’t the end. We aren’t at the finish line just because we have problems. We may think we are but we have no idea where the actual end is.

We humans are silly creatures.

We decide we want something and then we try to figure out how to make it happen. You can’t know the how until after you succeed at what you want to do. You can experiment and try many different things but you don’t know the path until after you walk it.

Our Thoughts Determine Our Outcomes

As Edison did, the Wright Brothers did and many others.  All brilliant minds and inventors attempt many different things. Still, they can only determine what worked after it worked. Do you get this? It is an important principle. You never know how first. So relax.

You what something and don’t know how to make it happen. You learn what worked once you succeed. When you decide on a goal to pursue, that something you really want, you have to trust you will get it, even though you don’t know how it will happen.

You not only trust, but you believe you will get it. You know you will get it. Why? Because you determine to get it! You decide you won’t quit until you do. That is how you make things happen. You don’t wait for it you take action and get it done. YOU, YOU, YOU!

We Learn By Trail And Error

Even if you don’t know what to do you can take tiny steps in the direction of what you want. You don’t have to know how in order to act. You can do anything at all that moves you forward. You can study, research, connect with others and examine the possibilities.

You can go as far as you can see and when you get there you can see further. You learn as you go. Things work and  they don’t work. You learn by trial and error. There may be detours and obstacles along the route but you persist until you arrive at your destination.

After you get there you can describe how you did it for others. This is a concept that is very useful to understand and embrace. You will figure out the how but you don’t have to know the how how to begin. So begin. Don’t wait. Take positive constructive actions.

Mistakes Are Valuable – Learn From Mistakes

Concentrate on what you want and all the positive reasons why you want it and the how will take care of itself. Be clear and be motivated. Stay the course, act and continue to follow through. Never give up and you will eventually reach your goal.

The next major principle to understand is: Everything always works out for the best in the end. It actually does. Many people look back on trying circumstances, even the worst of their life, and at some point note, it ultimately was a positive defining moment.

The very worst becomes the thing most needed once they can look back and examine the events in their life and connect the dots. You can’t connect the dots until you look back. Hindsight is 20/20. That means you could have had  faith going through it in the first place.

Perception Is Everything

Yes, it is a big ordeal but ultimately it will all work out. Some day you will look back and laugh or appreciate every hardship you went through. So why wait. Begin now to appreciate everything. You are learning and growing through trials. The kite rises against the wind.

It always works out for the best in the end. If you are still struggling then realize you aren’t at the end, yet. This is useful concept to get and embrace. It isn’t over yet. Everything will work out. Trust it! Everything WILL work out. Have faith. It will be good in the end.

What is better to believe? It is terrible and all is lost or you always somehow manage to land on your feet? Choose the beliefs that support you because their are only two kinds. Those that support and those that don’t. Neither may be true, so pick what helps you.

You Go Where Your Thoughts Take You

Silly humans always want guarantees first. How would you ever get one? Who can guarantee anything for you? Will it be hard or easy? Who knows until you attempt it? You can’t know first. You can only do whatever it takes to see it through to a successful conclusion.

How do you know when something is over? Life is a process. That is why you can only look back and connect the dots and you can’t do it looking ahead. You can plan and try and yet most people learn that the plan they start with is never the one they finish with. Get it?

Things change. Keep going. If you are struggling it isn’t over yet. You are in the process of bringing about positive change for yourself. You are in the midst of fighting the good fight. You will prevail if you keep going. Keep your eye on the prize and continue with faith.

Skill Comes Of Doing

There are plenty of people who quit before they would have succeeded because they didn’t realize where they were in the process. They throw in the towel. Napoleon Hill pointed out all defeat is temporary with seeds of learning and opportunity.

The only failure is when you stop trying. He recounted the story about the man who stopped digging three feet from a very rich gold vein. In a nutshell, man buys gold mine, digs, hits gold, vein runs dry. He keeps digging and digging nothing. He stops and sells mine.

The individual who bought it consults with experts and strikes a major vein only three feet form where the first owner stopped. Three feet further! That was the difference between rich and poor. The original owner quit thinking it was over. He lost everything.

Learn New Positive Habits That Support You

Because he quit IT was over. For the new owner it was just the beginning of new riches. That could have been the end of the story except the first owner learned from his defeat. He could have done something stupid. Instead he learned from his defeat.

He could have thrown in the towel to never win at anything or try anything again. Instead, he learned a valuable lesson and determined to make it gain, by selling insurance. He vowed never to accept ‘no’ as an answer. He made millions in the insurance business.

He persevered and never gave up. He learned from his first major loss in the gold business. He built an empire because he learned to stay committed. He stated loosing the gold was the best thing that ever happened to him. That is the winner’s attitude!

The More We Do The More We Are Able To Do

You may be tempted to quit because times are tough. If you realize when times are tough that it isn’t over yet, you can keep going if you want to. You can know inside it will all work out in the end. It always does in some way. Have faith, look for the good and the silver linings.

Look for the good and you will find it. Look for problems you will find those too. Condition your mind. Your willingness to abandon your hope and dreams is your old conditioning, your old thought habits. Develop new habits of thought and action that serve you.

Nothing is gospel. Nothing is true. Nothing is written in stone. It is either useful or not. It is either supportive or not. It is either about increase or decrease. It is either positive or negative. YOU are the deciding factor for what YOU determine it to be.

What You Say Is What You Get

Expect things to work out. If you are struggling right now it isn’t over yet. Keep at it. Commit to seeing it through. Obstacles will give way if you trust, believe yourself and take action. If you give up that will who knows what might be? You will look back to know someday.

Persist and you will land on your feet eventually. Regardless. If you throw in the towel you can learn from it you too. You  might do well like the gentleman in Three Feet From Gold. Realize it is YOU who determines your present and you the future.

It is all in your hands. Since you can’t know the outcome in advance you might as well enjoy the the journey. Keep your eye on the prize. Take action and move forward. Keep the faith. Stay positive. Do no harm to self or others.

If You Think You Can Or Think You Can’t You Are Right

Make it a point to enjoy it no matter how difficult. Condition yourself for success. Learn along the way. Look for the good and celebrate everything! Appreciate your trials and your easy times. That is how you prepare yourself to win! Celebrate EVERYTHING!” Rex Sikes

Smile more today just because you can!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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The Secret: How To Stop Being A Crap Magnet

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“Consider this. What you focus on expands. Energy flows where your attention goes. You become what you think about. Keep this in mind. Birds of a feather flock together. Like attracts like. Why do I point this out?

Because when you focus on your problems you get back more problems. Whether you focus on career or job related problems, relationship issues with family or friends, health issues or wealth issues if you focus on the problem you find, attract and or create more problems. When you focus on crap you get crap back.

When you try to solve your problems you only end up with more problems. You think fixing them will make things better but it won’t because your focus is on what is wrong. If you focus on what is wrong you get more of the same. You do this because of habit. You were brought up to try to fix and solve things.

Success Secret: Don’t Fight The Old Focus On Building the New

It is old, chronic, habitual, mental conditioning that does not serve you well. When you look for and find what is wrong you only end up with more of the same. If your present moment is fill with crap how do you expect to live a wonderful life? How do you expect to feel marvelous? I mean really, why would you expect it to be different?

To feel marvelous and live a wonderful life you must look for and find what is good and what is right about this moment. You must accentuate the positive and nurture it. You look for and find anything and everything to feel grateful about and your life will change. Focus on the good in the present moment!

Consider this. You are on the freeway and traffic is moving quite well. No hangups everything is great. Suddenly, someone cuts you off, gives you the finger, slams on the brakes and screws with your driving. It sucks! THEN what do you do. Right then, you probably get hot, call him an ahole, give the finger back, and swear a bit. Or some version of all this.

What You Say Is What You Get – What You See Is What You Get

BUT what really happens. IT ruins your drive. You focus on and recount to others the ahole on the freeway. You have lost sight of the fact that traffic was moving well and all was good. What looms in your mind is the negative moment. YOU do this because of habit. Your brain has been conditioned and wired that way.

You focus on what was wrong and ignore and forget about all the rest. You miss all the good stuff. It doesn’t even exist anymore to your preoccupied mind. Your physiology changed, you got stressed, angry and then you relive it over again doing the same thing to yourself. Don’t forget the good just because bad happens.

This is just an example but realize your focus, your state of being, your emotions, your energy, your thoughts all change around the problem. They will stay that way as long as you focus on it. So what do most people do. They go from problem to problem in life either complaining or complaining and trying to fix them. It doesn’t work!

Whatever You Focus On You Create

Your focus, your state of being, your emotions, your energy, your thoughts will change around what is right and good too. You will get the good thoughts, feelings and chemicals from within. Whatever you focus on you get more of it back. Happy states of being or turbulent states; what do you want for yourself and your life?

This is precisely why gratitude is so powerful. Look for and find all the good in your present. Find what is right! Find all the good from your past. Stop reliving old wounds. Stop surviving hurts and start thriving. You will discover powerful, positive changes occur for you when you let go of the negative and switch to the positive.

You can do this if you think you can. It is simple. Look around your and find the good no matter how tiny or obscure. Put your attention ofYou won’t if you don’t think you can. It is always up to you and only you. Stop trying to fix everything. You never will anyway. If you don’t think you can do this you won’t. The choice is always yours.

What You Think About You Bring About

Stop trying to fix yourself. Stop looking for what is wrong. Start looking for what is right, what is working, what your strengths, talents, abilities and resources are and focus on these. Be grateful and discover your excellent self. Fall in love with you at the deepest level. Enjoy and delight in you. Find all the good things!

Stop criticizing and blaming yourself. Start loving, feeling grateful for you and enjoy yourself. Focus your attention on what what works in your life. Focus on the positive and value it. Truly value yourself and every aspect of your history. Put your energy and attention onto these. Think these thoughts repeatedly.

The quality of your life is determined by what you focus on. The quality of your life is determined by how you focus your attention on what you focus on? Get that? How you look at yourself and your situations past and present determine how you feel. How you feel determines how much you enjoy life. Stop the negative.

Thoughts Become Things

Stop looking at what is wrong, doesn’t work, disappointments and hurts past and present. Start looking at the good, the new, the right, the positive, what does work. STOP and smell the roses! STOP and see the forest through the trees! Want to live a magnificent life? Stop and celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy today!

If you like these posts please subscribe. If you think these posts would help others please share them. Help Spread the word. 

Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

NEW BLOG SITE LAUNCHES SOON – Do you get this blog emailed to you? You will have  to again subscribe to this blog, newsletter. I’d hate for you to miss anything when it switches. Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!

Are You Bigger Or Smaller Than Your Problems?

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“This is an critical question. Are you bigger or are you smaller than your problems? If you have big problems it means you are a smaller person by comparison. Do you think you will solve them at that size?

I have written and shared within these pages that what you think about you get. An immutable law of the universe. Whether positive or negative you manifest what you spend most of your time thinking about.

Your brain doesn’t care whether it is positive or negative, good or bad for you, true or false it just provides you with more of the same. Your Reticular Activating System seeks matches inside and outside of you.

Believing Is Seeing

Nothing has any meaning except the meaning we assign it. The world went on prior to the arrival of humans and no one judged days as good or bad, catastrophic or calm and wonderful. Humans make evaluations.

Enter the human enter judgements. Days became good or bad, weather became good or bad. Situations became good or bad large and small. We assigned meaning to these for the first time.

There is no intrinsic meaning without human perception. That is all there is, our perceptions. Our perceptions are formed by our previous past conditioning, our experiences, the beliefs, values and opinions we have formed.  We use these and assign meaning.

Nothing Has Any Meaning Except The Meaning We Assign It

Perceptions are limited by our neurological processes and filters, our five senses. We don’t see the world, situations and events as is, we perceive these only in part. We can’t perceive the entire picture, through our processes and filters. We have limited info to begin with. However limited it doesn’t stop us from making judgements.

The purpose of this blog is to inspire, motivate and show you how else things can be. If we’re going to believe a fiction why not believe one that serves us better and supports us to make positive things happen. Believe the best version you can and make it happen.

Since we have been conditioned and respond from that conditioning automatically whether we want to or not, perhaps, it is time to change our conditioning  to respond automatically in a way we would like to. Then we could begin to get the results we want to get.

If You Think You Can Or You Think You Can’t You Are Right

I have shared with you the importance of developing a positive CAN DO mindset instead of a negative can’t do one. We become what we think about most often. So become a powerful person of action.

Our thoughts determine our feelings, our feelings our actions or lack of them, our actions or lack of them determine the results we get. Thoughts precede actions.

Can Do helps make more things happen than can’t do. A Can Do person is a person focused on solutions. If you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right. Remember?

You Get What You Focus On

What you focus on is what you get. Are you predominantly focused on what you want or don’t want,? Do you celebrate what you have or focus on what you don’t have?

Do you love life or is it just okay? Are your problems big or small? Think about this for a moment? If your problems are big it means you are a small person. It should be the other way around.

I have discussed living as a winner, a victor, a champion an emperor. Why? Because the mindset of these are dedicated to success and accomplishment. You should be bigger than your problems.

You Attitude Determines Your Altitude

I write of an unstoppable attitude, one of commitment and persistence and often discuss Olympic Athletes as examples. These athletes know the commitment conditioning takes.

They commit, train for 4 years or longer, whether they feel like it or not, for seconds worth of competition. Those who get to compete are world class whether they medal or not.

The attitude, the dedication is wonderful. It is admirable. It is the kind of dedication we should have. Train your brain and your thoughts as an olympic athlete trains their mind and body.

If You Have A Big Problem It Means You Are A Small Person

So here is my question? What size are you? Are you bigger or larger than your problems? Are you in charge or do they dictate how you and life will be?

When you think about them do they loom over you or do you understand that all obstacles are there to learn from, resolve and move on. We grow through our struggles. We evolve.

The kite rises against the wind. Steel is hardened in the fire. Are you a champion or not? Are your problems larger than you or are you larger than the problems?

It Is All A Matter Of Perspective

Stop focusing on the size of your problems. Begin focusing on the size of you! The bigger you are inside you own mind the more easily you can handle things. The more we do the more we can do.

It is time for you to decide, don’t you think? Dedicate yourself to becoming solution focused instead of problem focused. Focus on what you want not lack or problems or what you wish to avoid.

Stop focusing on the problem and begin to focus on your goals and dreams. Take charge and determine you will pay attention to what you decide to pay attention to. You can aim your attention.

Decide Right Now To Be Bigger Than Your Problems

Steel your mind. Adopt the winner, the victor mindset and put your problems into perspective. There is no meaning except the meaning you assign. So assign meaning that works for you and supports you!

It is time to become larger than life and live like an emperor. Live as one who can and does successfully resolve difficulties no matter how difficult. Be the champion, the victor, the emperor.

Most negative people think of problems as overwhelming. Most successful people understand that all problems are simply things we handle on a daily basis. They are no big deal. They can be handled.

Be The Champion Be Unstoppable

They master their problems instead of letting problems master them. You can too. Devote yourself to learning to master your problems, handle them, and you become unstoppable

In an earlier blog I wrote about David and how he rushed and slew Goliath. David didn’t see Goliath as a giant and a massive threat, instead he trusted and declared that this day god would prevail.

Cut your problems down to size. Stop whining about problems and start seeking solutions. Speak only to bless, heal and prosper. What you say is what you get. Focus on solutions. Focus on your goals.

Your Future Depends On Your Decisions Now

The outer results are only a reflection of what is going on in your inner world. What you experience today comes from prior thoughts and conditioning. If you want tomorrow to be different you start your change today. Think differently and your life changes!

Decide you will be bigger than any problem Decide to be the victor, the champion, the emperor. Dictate your results don’t let them dictate you. BE bigger.

Someone once said, ‘the size of the problem doesn’t matter but the size of you does.’ Put your problems into perspective. This is what you can do. You can decide to never let a problem rob you of any success of happiness.

Our Struggles Make Us Stronger Celebrate Them

You are competent and able to handle anything that comes your way. If you don’t know how you can learn how.Your struggles are making you stronger as a result. You are tried and tested by fire. The kite rises against the wind.

Inside every challenge is a learning and an opportunity if you look for them. Live as the victor. Live large. Be the emperor of your life. Know you can handle anything.  AND celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Decide to delight in this day!

Find moments to enjoy and celebrate today! If you like these posts please subscribe. If you think these posts would help others please share them. Help Spread the word. 

Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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Isn’t It Time To Be The Person You Always Wanted To Be?

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“Isn’t it time to be the person you always wanted to be? Don’t you want the career, the relationship, the life you always hoped you could have? If you want more success and happiness you have to make new decisions.

You must decide, to choose, how you want to think, feel, act and live your life. I shared some ways you can begin to do that in my recent blogs. Here is something else you can do.

Give Yourself Permission To Change For The Better

If you don’t decide now you are living from a past decision. If that is fine with you then carry on. If, however, you wish things were different, you want to get better results, you don’t like your present circumstances, if this is how you think and fee, then you must make a new decision.

You must take the bull by the horns and choose to change things in your life that will enable you to make a difference for yourself. If you don’t decide, someone else chose for you, perhaps recently, perhaps a long time ago when you were very young. Still, someone chose for you. You need to make your own decisions. Don’t live from the past.

If you don’t act in your own best interest now, today, in the present, some other decision, made by some other person, that you adopted is controlling you and your outcomes. If you are okay with that carry on. If not change it now. You are the only one who should be in charge of yourself and your destiny. You need to be in control.

Your Future Does Not Depend On Your Past

Decide to be different. You may say, ‘wait you don’t understand, it is not that easy’. I understand it is not easy and that it COULD be easy. Whatever you think it is what it will be. If you think it is hard, you will be correct. If you think it easy, you will be right then too. Your thoughts make it so. Whatever you focus on expands.

Your thoughts determine what you get. Your thoughts create your feelings. Your feelings  lead to your actions (what you do or what you don’t do) which lead to the results you get. The starting point for all the results is your thoughts. If you don’t like the results you have been getting then you need to change your thoughts. Start now.

Give yourself permission. Make it okay for yourself to think and feel differently. Give yourself permission to see and feel and act differently, to get different, better, positive, powerful results. Give yourself permission to change your life for the better. Give yourself permission to make a new decision. Allow it. Permit it. Accept it.

Your Future Depends On The Decisions You Make Today

Once you do many things change for the better. They will remain the same as long as you remain the same. As long as you act from the past you will continue to get what you have always got. Move into the present, decide now.  Give yourself permission to use and enjoy your present to create a more wonderful future.

Some people never change because they don’t feel it is okay that they do. They remain stuck. You may need to give yourself permission and that is fine. Go ahead. Acknowledge that is is okay for you to move forward. It’s okay to change positively. Allow yourself to be okay with the unknown.  The future is wide open.

You can accomplish many things in the future once you get beyond being stuck. What keeps someone stuck is mostly old chronic conditioning. That’s okay it served you for a time and now it is time to change, let go and move forward in a positive direction of YOUR choosing. Permit yourself to be free of the past and take charge now. When you do it can begin to feel incredible. Enjoy it.

Enjoy feeling positive! Feel good about moving forward. Enjoy realizing this is the beginning. Many new ways of being can open up to you. Isn’t it time to be the person you always wanted to be? Do those things you always wanted to do. Have those things you have always wanted. Isn’t it time for you to begin today? Being right now! Delight and celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Another incredible day to delight in.

Find moments to enjoy and celebrate today! If you like these posts please subscribe. If you think these posts would help others please share them. Help Spread the word. 

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If You Don’t Start Moving You Will Always Be Right There Where You Are!

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“Some people never begin. The wish and want and hope for change but they do nothing at all to bring it about. Is this you? You can make positive changes easily. Would you like to learn how? If you do these simple things you can get a tremendous amount of transformation.

Obviously, in order to begin you must choose to begin. it Starts with your decision, your commitment to make your life more wonderful and grand. If you truly want this then beginning is easier. You just start doing some things you haven’t been doing.

If you want your life to change you must change things in your life. You can’t continue along the same old pathway expecting to get somewhere new. You have to start the new path. So you begin right from where you are. Right now, right here, is where it starts.

Want Your Life To Change? Change Things In Your Life

‘As a single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives.’ Henry David Thoreau

The reason we want to gain control of our thinking is so those negative thoughts that prevent us no longer take hold. Begin small, find a positive thought, one you agree with and want more of, and make it a mantra. Someone posted, they use, ‘this is easy’.

I like, ‘I can learn to do anything’. or ‘I am far more powerful than I presently realize’. And repeat those day and night whenever you can. Repetition is how the brain learns. Repetition with powerful emotions. So enjoy chanting this out loud.

Drop By Drop The Tub Fills

Shout them, feel great when you say them. DO one every morning and night and inbetween for at least thirty day. Find some supportive inspiring reading material or listening material and partake daily. Drop by drop the tub gets filled.

You can be surprised but how incredible a difference even a little bit of positive control makes. It is all about learning to create new positive habits to replace the old ones we no longer want. Does it take some effort.

Yup, and it is worth it. Affirm, declare, chant your mantra with wild enthusiasm. Make yourself feel good. Jump up and down, skip, sing, yell out loud. Learn that you control how you feel too. Relax, repeat them first thing in morning and last thing at night.

Nothing Great Was Ever Achieved Without Enthusiasm

Create a gratitude journal and list between 10 and 25 things you are grateful for right now, each day. Add a success journal and list those things you do each day that you consider a success. Those things you accomplish that move you forward and make you feel good.

If you do these things and do them regularly, in time the new pathway will become a well worn reliable path. You will have automatic positive new habits that serve you. You will find more delight and enjoyment in you and your life. So begin today!

Appreciate that you are deciding in your favor. That is a reason to celebrate, feel grateful and count as a success. Chose to be a winner and a victor. Chose to be a ‘CAN Do’ person, commit to it and persist in doing your daily diligence. Above all Celebrate everything! Rex Sikes

This day was made just for you!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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The Secret: You Must Push Through Limitations To Success

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“There are many things that separate those who are successful from those who are not. That separate those who can do from those who can’t. AND those who do from those who don’t. There is something you can learn to do that will give you the edge and help bring you the successes you want. It isn’t easy at first but it is worth doing!

Today, do something you have been putting off. Do something you don’t want to do that would be good for you. Perhaps, it means cleaning your office or your home. Writing a paper of report that you have been dreading. Going to the gym. Eating right. Whatever it might be make it a point of not putting it off any longer.

It never helps to procrastinate. Typically, it just only adds pressure until we no longer feel we can go without getting it done, so we  give in and do it. If, instead, you take care of it, in  addition to decreasing stress, you do something valuable. You took charge. You dictated the circumstances instead of letting circumstances dictate you.

What We Want To Do With Ease We Must First Do With Diligence

This point should not be lost on you! When you dictate the circumstances you come from a place of your own power and authority. You put yourself in the driver’s seat. This is what successful entrepreneurs do. They are in charge and they make things happen. Isn’t that preferable to things controlling you?

When you do something you don’t want to do, when you push past your own limits and excuses and reasons for not getting it done you become a leader of yourself. You do it anyway. You are larger than the task. When you behave this way routinely, with this mindset you develop habits that help make you unstoppable and successful.

It means you make a commitment to yourself and follow through. It is important to keep your word to others and yourself. You learn to push through resistance and you learn to persist. Olympic  athletes train when they don’t feel like.  Can you imagine wanting to get up and train really hard, really early, day in and day out?

The More We Do The More We Can Do

Go beyond what stops you. Troops in basic training may not feel like getting up for roll call but they have external pressures to insure they do. Athletes going for the gold need to rely on their own internal means for training when they don’t feel like it. Motivation comes from action not by waiting for it.

Those who are successful do things those who aren’t will never do. They don’t fear work. The go the extra mile when others quit. They don’t let their emotions stop them from getting closer to their goals. They are driven. You can learn how to push through your limitations only by pushing through your limitations.

The more you do the more you can do. It gets easier once you start. Perhaps, you are one of those people who have to learn that starting is 80% of getting it completed. In the past, you looked at that task and talked or felt your way out of not doing it. Learn how to talk and feel your way into doing it. That would be immensely beneficial!

Develop Habits That Breed Success

You and I need to use our our own internal motivation and rewards to act. We need to learn to do it in spite of our best reasons for not. We need to learn to not listen to our excuses and start listening to all the reasons we should complete our tasks. Then we will have learned to keep going in spite of the odds and challenges.

We will keep going when we otherwise might have felt like throwing in the towel. We will have learned how to dedicate ourselves, commit to our goals and tasks and persist, until we achieve what we want to achieve. When you complete the task notice how you feel. I bet you feel pretty good and maybe even proud of yourself.

That makes it worth it too. You want to spend more time feeling good. When it comes to positive thinking there may be times you don’t feel like it but you persist anyway because you know it is best for you. As you develop the habits to take care of things ‘anyway’, in spite of inner resistance you are truly becoming a victor.

When you complete the task notice what you feel. Notice how you feel. If you feel good about it that is part of the reward you get for acting in your own behalf. Savor the feeling and appreciate yourself. Notice what you learned about accomplishing your task. You did it. Acknowledge and validate! Then take time to feel glad and celebrate everything.” Rex Sikes

Celebrate the day and that you are in it!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

NEW BLOG SITE LAUNCHES SOON – Do you get this blog emailed to you? You will have  to again subscribe to this blog, newsletter. I’d hate for you to miss anything when it switches. Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!

Don’t Make Your Life About Solving Problems

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“Life is just to short, don’t you think? Why spend it locked fighting obstacles and problems? Did you know there is a better way and a better life for you? You can begin to have it right away if you make some simple changes. Would you like that? Read on!

Did you know that what you focus on is what you find? What you focus on is what you get. SO focus on the good in life. Focus on opportunities. Focus on what you can do. Focus on who and what you love. Focus on delight and abundance. What you think about you bring about. What you focus on literally expands.

Your Reticular Activating System (RAS) looks for matches within you and your experience and outside of you in your circumstances based on what you are concentrating on, or holding in your mind. Energy flows where your attention goes. Focus on creating the best life you can have so you can begin to start having that.

Actually It Is Believing Is Seeing And Not The Other Way Around

Focus on love not hate. Focus on happiness not sadness. Focus on health not disease. Focus on wealth not on lack. Focus on peace not on war. Focus on gratitude and celebration and you will get more of the same. Whatever you focus on you will get more back. You become what you think about.

If you focus on problems and obstacles that is what you will find. Don’t ignore them, handle them swiftly. Do whatever needs to be done and then shift your thinking back over to your goal and what you want. Handle them and re-aim your mind. Do not make you life about handling or solving problems.

The trouble for most people is they are always ‘dealing’ with things. One thing after the other. Their focus is on what is going wrong not what is going right. Their focus is on what they don’t have not what they do have. If you want things to go right you must thinking about things going right.

What You Focus On Expands

If you want to be wealthy think about, focus on making, investing and growing your money. Focus on keeping your money. Stop focusing on spending it, the bills and on not having enough. Remember, your RAS looks for matches. It is a faithful servant! Stop looking for what is wrong. Look for opportunities.

The difference between happy, successful, rich people and those who aren’t is most often, simply this. The happy, successful, rich people focus on what they want. Those who are unhappy, not successful and broke focus on what they do not want.

The unsuccessful miss opportunities because their minds aren’t tuned in for them. If you are focused on problems and troubles you are missing many opportunities because the matches your brain finds are more of the same troubles. If you want opportunities you have to be focused on the good things the brain would look for.

Stop Wasting Time With Small And Large Distractions

Henry Ford, the man who said, ‘whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right,’ also said. ‘i think about what I can do. I put my attention on what I can do in any situation and what I can’t do falls away.’ He doesn’t wast time with what he can not do! Think and speak only to bless, heal and prosper. Think what you Can Do!

Stop wasting time with petty distractions. Social media, gossips, arguments, bad news, it is filled with plenty of things to let go of. Start filling your mind, heart and being with good things, inspiring messages. Surround yourself with positive, inspiring, motivating people and you will have more of the same.

A negative attitude never makes for a positive life. Life is too short to be caught up in what is wrong. You can make it right. You can change things. You can change your mindset and alter your circumstances. You can be, do and have whatever you want when you start believing you can and that you deserve it.

Live Your Purpose You Deserve To

After all, aren’t you worth all the joy and happiness in life? Aren’t you worth all the love, family and friendship? You been born into an abundant universe. You can have all you want without depriving anyone else of theirs too. Focus on creating what you want to include more of. Exclude the rest. You can do this!

Make it a point to shift your thinking. Begin living the life you deserve. You can! You absolutely can! Don’t put it off, begin today. Start putting your mind on what you want. Use it to bring you more of the good things. It is your faithful servant. Whatever you focus on it will bring you more of. Take the energy away from what you do not want. Enjoy more of life.  Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Delight in this day!

If you like these posts please subscribe. If you think these posts would help others please share them. Help Spread the word. 

Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

NEW BLOG SITE LAUNCHES SOON – Do you get this blog emailed to you? You will have  to again subscribe to this blog, newsletter. I’d hate for you to miss anything when it switches. Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!

Why You Must To Keep A Success Journal

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“Do you want to be more successful? There are many ways to succeed. There are the BIG, grandiose successes, the ‘top of the world’ ones. Then there are all the rest. All the way down to the barely noticeable ones. Success comes in all sizes and flavors.

There are even ones you don ‘t count.

Why don’t you count them? Because you take them for granted. They are too small. You consider them insignificant. They don’t make it onto your radar but they are there. You should count them. Awareness is the first major step in changing.

To Succeed You Must First Believe You Can

I’ve encouraged people to keep a gratitude journal for decades. Others have encouraged us to count our blessings since ancient times. Why? Recording what we are grateful for helps us to become aware of all the good things in our life.

We can change our thoughts and our feelings as we become aware of the countless things we take for granted daily we could appreciate. When we fill our mind and heart with appreciation we transform. Celebrate and delight in all and you will feel great!

The same is true of our successes. Want to be more successful? Start acknowledging how successful you already are in so many ways. What is a success? Frankly, it is anything you consider as one. ‘I got up at 6am’ for one person that might be a small success.

You Create Your Own Opportunities

For another person, a huge one! ‘I made pancakes’. ‘I took a bath’. It doesn’t matter how large or small, the only thing that matters is that you are in control of doing it. It relates to you and not other people. You could say, ‘I worked well with others at the office today’.

‘I got along with Susan.’ The point is, in order for it to occur it doesn’t rely on others it relies on you. Understand? If not ask, I’ll clarify in comments. Notice these, no matter how small. In fact, look for all the tiny ways you succeed daily that you never considered.

Not only have you never considered, you have not named them as successes, acknowledged them, given them the recognition deserved or validated yourself for doing them. Become aware of all the ways you succeed and appreciate yourself for these.

Decide Commit Succeed

Write them down. List them. No less than 5 per day. More is fine. More is desirable. I recommend people start a daily gratitude journal listing 25 things. Some people recommend fewer, some may recommend more. The point is to draw your attention to these areas.

If you are already doing a gratitude journal EXCELLENT! That is a success right there. If not, you can begin one now, too. THEN, that would be a success. Since you are doing the gratitude journal, take a moment or two more and list your successes.

You can use the same journal or have two separate ones. Some people really respond better if they personalize their journal and make it really special. Others just use a legal pad. I think having something nice adds value to the process and it is up to you.

Some People Only Dream Of Success

If you want to further the exercise: Write down your daily successes.Write what you did and how it feels. Enjoy validating and feeling positive and congratulating yourself. Enjoy celebrating and appreciating these. Always room for  more gratitude!

Note if you did something you didn’t want to do, but you did it anyway. Write out what you learned in ‘doing anyway’. Congratulate yourself on all the little things and the big things. Remember, everything counts. Keep it simple for yourself. So you do it daily!

You did the laundry; you made you bed; you made breakfast; you had some fruit instead of cereal; you got to work on time; you walked to work; you exercised; you sent a thank you note; you made cookies for kids; you mowed the lawn; you fed the cat; anything!

Others Wake Up And Achieve Success

Of course, they can be larger. Just don’t miss all the grains of sand looking for the boulders. Everyday, write in your journal. Feeling grateful and feeling successful are a sure way to bring about more of the same. Remember, you become what you think about! Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

If today isn’t your day, then whose day is it?

If you like these posts please subscribe. If you think these posts would help others please share them. Help Spread the word. 

Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

NEW BLOG SITE LAUNCHES SOON – Do you get this blog emailed to you? You will have  to again subscribe to this blog, newsletter. I’d hate for you to miss anything when it switches. Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!