Tag Archives: Forgiveness

Loving Means Recognizing What You Are Doing When You Are Doing It

you are a living magnet

In my recent post I mentioned that ‘loving’ behaviors are quantifiable while the generalization ‘love’ is not. You can tell when someone is behaving in a loving way towards you or towards someone else. It is readily apparent. You can encourage the loving behaviors by telling the other person what you enjoy and by responding back in loving ways. You can discourage or extinguish less than loving behaviors by word and deed as well. You can begin to get more of what you want and enjoy how you like to be treated when you communicate in loving ways.

You can be more loving across the board.  Certainly, you can be so  in a romantic way with your partner but you can also treat family members in more loving ways. You can act more loving towards friends and co-workers. Caregivers can provide loving care to the recipients, all of is can be more loving towards people who are hungry, homeless and have special needs. It is not only in the context of intimate relationships. We are not discussing  ‘LOVE’ but describing loving behaviors.

It is very important to recognize when you are and aren’t behaving in loving ways toward others. You can tell immediately whether what you are thinking, saying and doing is having a positive affect and getting a positive response or not. You have a metaphorical yardstick to determine whether your behaviors are moving you closer or further away from helping the other person feel more loved and accepted. At any moment you are either moving toward being loving or away from being loving. It is simple to notice.

Once you notice whether or not you are doing what you intend to you can adjust accordingly. IF you are open to feedback and your intention is to be more loving you can easily change what you are thinking, saying and doing  to love, nurture, accept and support the other person.

Instead of attempting to justify any behavior by saying or thinking ‘its because I love you’ you can question yourself and decide if you words and actions are actual displays of loving, accepting, nurturing and supportive behavior. You have a real means of deciding.  You can tell if what you are doing is ACTUALLY loving or not. This is practical. Then there is no deceiving oneself.

what u put out u attract

Either you are or you aren’t. If you are honest with yourself you know when you are being loving or if what you are doing is agitating or hurting the other person? You can look, see, hear and even feel whether the other person is receptive or not. There is evidence.

Pay attention and you will discover when you are off base and when you are genuinely behaving kindly and in loving ways.  Since you have a way to notice, (its in the other person’s response to you) you have a way to change when you need to or continue to do more of the same.

You can ask the other person what loving behaviors they enjoy and how they prefer to be treated. You can share your preferences with them as well. It is desirable to communicate your wants and needs in relationships with others. Parent to child, lover to lover, friend to friend etc. Loving is something one does and they way one does it. ‘LOVE’ is a philosophical construct.

For example, ‘I want more love’ tells us precisely what? On the other hand, ‘I want to be treated in loving ways more often. Here is how and when’, communicates what one can do to help this person feel more ‘love’. If you are willing you can respond to this person by treating them as they ask to be treated. It is a two way street, of course.

I return to the Golden Rule. If you enjoy being treated nicely you can use that to assume the other person does too. Then treat them nicely. The Golden Rules states ‘treat others as you prefer to be treated’. This sets a guideline for us. It makes us aware of treating others as well or better than you yourself want to be treated. If we don’t like something we can assume others may not either so don’t treat them that way.

HERE is where the Platinum Rule comes into play. The Platinum Rules states, ‘treat people as they prefer to be treated’. This means some of the specifics may differ. They may not enjoy the same things you do.

For example, if one of the ways your partner could demonstrate being more loving towards you means ‘taking you out to a movie of your choice’ your partner’s way of feeling being loved might be ‘to have you spend time sharing hopes and dreams, to sit and talk more often’. Not everyone likes the same things. You both can provide each other with what is wanted to feel more loved. You can give the other person what the person wants if you are willing.

To adhere to the Platinum Rule you find out what is important to the other person. You discover what the other person likes, what the other prefers and hopes and wants to include. Then you deliver that as best you are able. You can and should do this unselfishly with no expectation of return. That is the Golden Rule in operation.

think happy thoughts good things will happen

If they feel ‘more loved spending a quiet evening at home with you’ and ‘you feel more loved going out together and having wild experiences’ then you negotiate times when you can each do for the other what the other enjoys doing. This is ideal. To have great communication and mutually desire to meet each others needs.

You will be behaving in more loving ways when you make a ‘special quiet at home evening for your partner’ and your partner will be nurturing you and more loving towards you in scheduling a ‘wild time of going out together’. You both help each other feel more important and validate the ways in which you both feel loved when you take into account how the other person feels loved by you. You increase your ‘love’ when you act in loving ways towards and with each other.

When you do for another, help another, give to another, make another feel special you are helping yourself too. When you make others feel loved, accepted, important and supported without expecting any return you are loving unconditionally. When you simple add more loving into your life you are benefiting yourself while you benefit others.

Consider all the people in your life, surrounding you, whom you can behave more lovingly towards. Your parents, children, partner, boss, employees, co-workers, associates, friends, strangers you meet day to day in a variety of places, people with needs, and all others. How can you add to their enjoyment of each day? When you become more loving toward yourself and extend it toward others all of your life becomes much more remarkable and positive.

When you uplift others you uplift yourself. You can more intimately connect with those near and dear to you AND you can also find ways nurture and support friends, associates and strangers.

When your goal is to UPLIFT everyone and think the highest of all people, everyone benefits. You will benefit in countless untold ways and the others will too. You help make your living circumstances and those of the people around you so much nicer. Be the catalyst for positive change!

I really don’t want to point this out because the focus is not in what is returned but in what is given freely, but Giver’s get. They really do! So give and give freely and enjoy the blessings you receive while making others feel better and more loved. Enjoy” Rex Sikes

Today, find many reasons to enjoy yourself and others! Be thankful!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

How To Eliminate Unwanted Negative Habits That Hold You Back

we create what we believe

“It doesn’t matter what we face in our everyday lives. Whether our lives are okay or downright terrible we will gain great benefit and overall well-being when we begin to embrace a lifestyle filled with positive thinking and with positive habits. Since everything begins with thought we begin there. We make the decision to deliberately manage our thinking. We train our mind to see the good in everything. We make this a habit by repetition. I have shared many ways to do this in previous posts. The point is to begin. When you begin everything that can follow becomes possible. When you don’t start anew everything remains the same. It is up to you which kind of life you want to have.

The key to changing negative habits into positive ones is to replace them. If you have not been thinking positively much of your lifetime you begin easily. Choose an affirmation you can repeat throughout the day. Repeat it silently to yourself when around others but energetically and with enthusiasm shout it out repeatedly when alone. Positive added energy brings faster results. Keep doing this daily. You can add other positive affirmations that make you feel good too.

Look for the good and new in each moment, person, event and circumstances. Learn the art of reframing by focusing on the positive aspects and benefits that may reside in each (even hidden in each). What else could be possible besides the obvious less than glorious circumstance? What positive benefit may be hidden? What else could this mean that may be positive?

Train your mind to look for and find the silver lining in each dark cloud. Repeat this frequently and you will begin to develop the habit of seeing situations and people more positively. When you can do this you life does begin to qualitatively change for the better. When YOU train your mind you are deliberately taking control of your thoughts, your feelings and responses to outer circumstances. This is a powerful way to live and it may seem a bit foreign at first, it may even seem difficult. IT isn’t once you get the hang of it but you have to stay with it deliberately in order to discover the awesome benefits.

There are many different ways you can live more positively and powerfully.  You can practice affirmations, express gratitude for everything in your life, both the good and not so good (look for the silver lining). Read this blog, keep inspirational materials around you. These include inspiring quotes, photos, music, religious or otherwise. Read at least a page daily from motivational uplifting books. Listen to positive audios, watch positive videos. Help someone who has a need. Give. Walk more, sing, hum, exercise, get a massage, meditate, take time to relax and reflect positively on your day. Gift yourself from time to time. Get out in nature where you may feel inspired. Let go, unwind, enjoy life!

what you are will show - start now

The most important aspect to changing your life is to fill your time with more positive moments than negative. This begins with your thoughts and feelings. What are positive moments but moments when you think and feel wonderful. When you are feeling good! You may be amused, happy, blissful the point is you are feeling great! Whether it is true or not classify emotions into two categories Good and Not Good or bad. You know you don’t want to feel bad and you know all the different emotional labels for not feeling good. SO make it a point to manage your feelings. Think the thoughts and do those things that help you feel the best without harming or affecting others in negative way. This is all about you.

Rule of thumb you are either feeling good or not good. THE GOAL is to feel good. So whenever you are not feeling good do something, think better thoughts, walk, exercise, sing, hum, read, listen, do something healthy and positive to help yourself feel even just a little bit better. Every time you catch yourself not feeling good and you make yourself feel better you are training yourself, your neurology to move from feeling less than glorious to glorious.You don’t have to make a giant leap from depressed to bliss you just have to make yourself feel a little bit better. Once you feel a little bit better do something to feel a bit better again.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Once you being it is each step thereafter that gets you closer to your goal. Incrementally you will work yourself toward feeling good. When you keep doing this, anytime you become aware of not feeling good, you are building an incredible ability to move into good feelings and you are building a powerful reliable habit. Good or bad it is your choice. If it isn’t what you want YOU change it.

In order to make it a lifestyle filled with positive habits you must keep doing these. Correct repetition brings about reliable results. So stick with it. Have fun and enjoy the process. Take it lightly and little bit by little bit you will notice things begin to shift. Be patient and enjoy the process. It will one day seem remarkable that you did not always already do these things and doing each will bring you so much pleasure and joy. SO hang in there and make your life incredible. You can be because you are able to.” Rex Sikes

Decide to enjoy today to the utmost!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

My Life & Job Suck! So What Are You Doing To Change It?

Victim-or-Victorlulu-Compatibility-Mode-Microsoft-Word-1172012-103811-AM

“Okay, so how is it going?  Perhaps, your life isn’t going as well as you hoped it would by this time. Maybe you have relationship issues, money troubles, or your career isn’t where you want it to be. Maybe, you don’t like your job or  you don’t have the home or things you want yet.

Life is supposed to be great, right, yet it just isn’t as much fun as it should be. You feel stressed and there is never enough time in the day OR the year to make it better. You feel disappointed and you’d rather enjoy family, friends and life much more than you presently do.

So what are you doing to change it?

That it the question? WHAT are YOU doing to CHANGE IT?

I could stop right here because this is an important question for you to entertain if you presently aren’t pleased with your circumstances. I simply want to point out  that if you aren’t doing anything you are perpetuating the very thing you don’t want.

If you are fighting it, thinking about it, worrying about it, depressed about it, resisting it you are perpetuating it as much, maybe even more, as if you did nothing at all.

What you resist persists! IF you want your life to change you have to change some things in your life. Remember, the definition of insanity is to do the same thing again and again hoping for different results. You can’t hope yourself into something different while continuing to do the same things repeatedly.

You have to change some things that you are doing but you can take it easy, go step by step gently, and by doing some simple things you can begin to make some incredible headway into creating what you do want.

beautiful thoughts positive emotions miracles

I recommend, whether this is your first visit to my blog, or one of many, to please go back through and re-read, re-visit what I have shared here. This is important. Expose and re-expose yourself to the concepts, principles and practices on different days. Do this repeatedly and you will discover great value and have remarkable insights.

Find other inspirational books and materials, and listen to positive audios daily. Fill your mind with positive, inspirational and motivational thoughts and ideas. This IS important.

Everything begins with thought. Our thinking is what matters most. It is where everything begins. Whether you feel your problems are within you, meaning you don’t think and feel right or whether you think they stem from others or are outside you – it is your thoughts about these where the issue really is. Your thinking determines whether you perpetuate the problem or discover the solution.

You want to begin by changing your thinking and feelings about yourself and your circumstances. YOU can absolutely do this! It is simple, it is easy, but it does require some discipline and you will want to absolutely stick with it. When you do you can make great strides quite quickly.

If you doubt what I am saying I suggest you try it for no less than 30 days. You can find some pretty amazing things happen within that time or shortly thereafter, if you will only do some simple things daily.

Make it a point to get up and read a page or more of inspirational material. You can use this blog or other books I have recommended. You can find great audios and put them on your phone or computer and listen in your car or while walking or sitting at home. ANYWHERE you can listen, LISTEN!

If you want to be happier, healthier and wealthier you need to change your thinking to make this happen. You can! You absolutely can get out of a rut and make your life the life you want.  It all begins with you and your thinking.

The simple principle to keep in mind is you become what you think about most of the time during the day. When you think positive powerful inspiring thoughts most of the time your life will begin to change for the better!

Look around you for everything you already do appreciate and feel grateful to have in your life. Place your attention of these. Celebrate and feel thankful more frequently. Then keep looking for those people, circumstances and things you have forgotten to feel grateful and good about and celebrate those too. Fill yourself with appreciation and you will make room for more to appreciate!

im a product of my decisions

SMILE MORE! JUST smile! Put a smile on your lips and wear it thorough your day as much as possible. Research indicates when you lift your facial muscles into a smile it stimulates the very chemicals and neurons of well-being and you begin to feel better.

Consider this, when you ARE feeling good you smile – science tells us the reverse is true too. SMILE and you will begin to feel good. SO SMILE MORE for no reason at all JUST to practice smiling. PLUS, you look far more attractive when you are smiling. Laughter is great too!

Take the time for yourself. After all, it doesn’t take much time at all to read one page. It only takes a second or two to remember to think positive thoughts during the day and for you to look at things you appreciate often. The more positive moments throughout each day the more positive minutes you will have. The more minutes you have that you enjoy the more hours you get of good things and so on.

Go ahead and take at least one minute, anytime of the day or night and just close your eyes and imagine feeling wonderful. Think positive thoughts! Imagine your life as if it were already everything you wanted. See yourself and your life as if all your dreams had already come true. Look at it, feel it, listen to what you say and think about it when everything is as you want. Just enjoy it. Savor these moments!

Spend a minute concentrating, paying attention to how it good it feels. Say to yourself, ‘this or something better’. You can spare a minute to imagine, can’t you? AND YES, you can do it for a longer time too. Just do it!

Do these things upon arising in the morning, throughout the day and before going to bed. If you do these simple things often everyday you will find you begin to think and feel better and it will open up the doorways to new opportunities.

You absolutely can transform your experience and your life BUT nothing will change unless you change some things you are doing. SO if life isn’t as enjoyable as you had hoped or expected return to my original question:  what are YOU doing to change it?” Rex Sikes

Discover, delight and celebrate. Today is made up of magical moments!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

Create – Don’t Wait! How To Make Your Dreams Come True

what u feel now is what u attract

“Time for a thought experiment. Try this on in your imagination. What is something you really want? It could be anything. For example, if you got a brand new car right now as a gift how would you feel? If that makes you feel a certain wonderful way to get your dream car then use that. If it is oodles of cash or a new home, use that.  Whatever works easily and best for you that is what you use. It doesn’t matter what you choose as long as it is very significant and would make you feel really, REALLY good.

So take a moment. Sit back somewhere comfortably. Relax… Take a moment and really do this slowly, take your time, no need to rush:

Now imagine you just got it. You were gifted. It is yours. What would you be thinking and feeling? What are you seeing, hearing or saying to yourself? What are you feeling and where in your body does it feel the most wonderful?

Imagine this scenario fully and feel all the feelings you would be feeling. Notice these. Take your time. Savor the feelings, enjoy these. How do you feel? Are you feeling incredible?

I hope so. Because this is a key here to making your dreams come true. There is a principle operating here. I am going to point something out you may or may not already be aware of.

This is already ongoing with us. It occurs all the time in our daily lives. Good things happen and then we feel good and think about them and enjoy them. Then bad things happen we feel bad, and we think about them, worry about them and fear the future. Right?  Good or bad, usually something comes along, an event, circumstance, some news, a person does or doesn’t do something and we end up feeling a certain way. Things happen and then we react. We feel and think about these.

When we let the outer world dictate how we think and feel, whether good or bad, we are ‘at effect’ or we are a victim of our circumstances. We are not the master of our fate or the captain of our soul as long as events, circumstances and others determine how we think, feel and act. Do you understand this. We do not act as if we are in charge. We are not ‘at cause’ BUT at the effect of others or outside influences. The goal is to be ‘at cause’ because the results we get ARE the effects of what WE cause.

stop waiting and go out and make them happen

There is good news. We can learn to use, what we already do, to get better results. We can learn to use this deliberately to make what we want in life to come true. This is great news. We only have to tweak what we are doing we don’t have to overhaul everything. We use the same process but we aim it differently. It is so much easier than having to learn everything over.

How much we enjoy our life is determined how much time we spend either feeling good or bad. It is what we think and feel most of the time that determines what we get. If you feel marvelous 90 percent of the time things are going pretty well. If you are feeling poorly 90 percept of the time I bet it sucks and you want to change it. 50/50 seems tolerable but not desirable and certainly it does not reflect what we are capable of. We can enjoy so much more!

So IF in real life something happens to make you feel a certain way YOU can use these very same feeling to make what YOU want happen. Think about this! Consider this! Instead of feeling things AFTER we get them, we feel the way we would feel IF we already had them IN ADVANCE of having them. We get the feelings first and these open the doorway.

Like attracts like. When we feel bad usually we think bad thoughts and more bad things seem to happen. It is a vicious cycle. We live as a victim of that cycle hoping something comes along to break it and make things better. That is not living as someone in charge and in control. That is not being ‘at cause’.

When we feel good easily we feel marvelous and more good things happen. It too is a cycle. Yes, something less than glorious can come along, and if we let it, it can upset the apple cart for awhile. If we choose to think otherwise about it and not let it affect us we can do that. We can also right the apple cart as soon as we are ready and then get back on track. Either way we then move back into feeling good.

Like thoughts attracts Like thoughts. Like feelings attract like feelings. Like actions attract like actions. It doesn’t matter whether the thoughts or feelings or actions are positive or negative we get back more of whatever we do the most of. If you are getting negative results in your life that is a signal that you need to shift your focus, you need to change the energy. This is great news you can look at your life and determine what kind of thoughts you need to be thinking more of.

So I will repeat because this is important to understand. The key is this. If a very specific event can make you think and feel a certain way, then thinking and feeling that same way, in advance, will open the door to make that specific event happen in your life. You put your thoughts and feelings and creative energy into bringing it about. You attract the thoughts, and feelings and actions to make it happen. You inspire yourself by feeling it fully FIRST! No waiting,

our thoughts are like magnets

The problem is most people wait to feel good. They wait for the outer circumstances to change before they feel better. The key is feel better FIRST and then the outer circumstances will change.

YES it is true MOST of ALL of US were NEVER EVER raised thinking this way. BUT just because we didn’t grow up doing it doesn’t mean we can’t start doing it right away. Now, this very moment, IS THE MOMENT of new opportunity!

Feel good right now and the doors open up. Thought precedes action. Everything begins with the thoughts you think. What you think and what you feel determines the actions you take. The quality of your overall life experience is determined by the preponderance of your thoughts and feelings.

Do you spend most of your time thinking and feeling good strong positive wonderful thoughts or not. YOU determine your experience. If you want a wonderful life you have to spend the bulk of your time thinking wonderful thoughts. THIS is just the way it works.

When you take 100% responsibility for everything good and bad in your life the moment you do, THE MOMENT YOU ACCEPT COMPLETE AND UTTER RESPONSIBILITY FOR EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE – YOUR LIFE WILL CHANGE!

You become ‘at cause’, you take the driver’s seat, you take control and you create the effects and make happen whatever want to happen. You want to get better effects, better results you have to start with better causes.

There is good news again! The fact of the matter is YOU ALREADY are doing this. You just aren’t getting the results you want because you think SOMEONE ELSE or SOMETHING ELSE is responsible. NO ONE ELSE IS RESPONSIBLE BUT YOU!!!

your only limits

When you get this, really get this, your life will improve. It doesn’t matter whatever you have good or bad, up until now, it truly doesn’t matter! It doesn’t matter what your life has been like.

If you decide NOW to live in charge, to be responsible then you will begin to shape your life the way you want it to be regardless of what may come your way or what has been. You will go after what you want and navigate the waters smooth or tough. You will make it happen because it relies on no one and nothing else but you.

When you take ALL responsibility for everything that happens or that you have or don’t it gives you the starting place to make things different. It allows you to claim power and act with authority. Instead of blaming others or making excuses for why things are the way they are you make things the way you want them to be. DO you get this? When everything answers to you (whether this is actually the case of not) you become the difference that makes the difference.

Consider a judge in a courtroom. The judge (empowered by law) determines and declares how things will be and how they will go because the judge is the ultimate authority in the courtroom. Everyone in the courtroom answers to the judge. No one else can do what the judge is able to do. When you become the empowered authority for your own life you can determine the course your life will take. You can stop drifting and living haphazardly. You can get better results.

Realize that this thought experiment becomes so much more significant for you to understand and embrace.

Think of what it is you desire. How you want your self to be, what you want to be able to do or what you wish to have. It could be health, wealth, possessions, it could be greater confidence, better relationships anything. Clearly define what you want. Imagine it, picture it vividly in your mind’s eye.

IF you had that RIGHT now, in this instant, if you already had your desire, it is completely yours, how do you feel?

What would you be feeling? Imagine this and then FEEL these feelings right now, fully, while thinking of your desire. Hold the images and feelings for a couple minutes. Really enjoy this! Imagine you have what you want in this present moment! Savor it.

when you change the way you look at things

I repeat!!! The key is this. If a very specific event can make you think and feel a certain way, then thinking and feeling that same way in advance will open the door to make that specific event happen in your life. You attract more of the feeling, the wonderful feelings, you feel how good it is, you open your own neural pathways, your neurology, your being up to including all of this in your life. You aren’t waiting you are CREATING!!!

This is the secret to manifesting your desires. Before going to sleep is a great time to do this. You can drift off to sleep FEELING the WONDERFUL FEELINGS you WOULD have IF you HAD your desire RIGHT NOW. Morning is a great time, when you get up. Repeat it throughout the day. Make it a habit it. DO it often. Feel wonderful FIRST!!! The more you do it the more your life will transform and quickly!

It will seem like magic when you GO FIRST, but it isn’t magical at all. You will be making what you want happen. You will be organizing and orchestrating your thoughts, feelings and actions for the positive. You will be stronger, happier, and enjoy more. You are better equipped to handle challenges and better able to recognize opportunities. Instead of chasing after dreams you are inviting them to come to you. You open the door to making things happen by feeling good first.

Just as when you plant a seed it takes time to grow in the darkness underground. You let it grow. You don’t dig it up to check on it. You leave it alone and in time it appears. This is the very same process you use to create, manifest, make happen, attract what you want. You feel it first and open the door. You keep enjoying and allowing the wonderful feelings, you stay focus on these great feelings, no matter what else is going on or not going on in your life circumstances.

You keep your attention and energy on the good feelings. You have planted a seed it is growing. In time you will have organized your being in such a way as to bring it about. You will have it in reality as long as you stay the course and do not quit. The key is good thoughts and feelings FIRST. ENJOY them. Enjoy everything! Be responsible for everything you create and you will start creating wonderful things for yourself.” Rex Sikes

Take time today to celebrate each moment. Discover and delight!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

How can I start believing in myself? It seems virtually impossible.

you can become anyone you want to be

“I was asked a great question, ‘How can I start believing in myself? It seems virtually impossible.’ I answered it and felt I would publish it as well. Here is my reply:

That is a great question and part of what this blog site is about. You start small, like eating a meal, take it bite by bite or bit by bit. You fill your mind with positive and inspirational material daily through reading, through listening to audios. You do it just as you would an exercise program, a little exercise everyday builds endurance and stamina and strength. You stick with it.

You focus on what you can are are already grateful for and celebrate these. Look into what things you can do, you have done that bring you feelings of well being, confidence or joy and remember these often too. You get together with positive people and focus together on what you can accomplish that makes you feel better and you work on it and make things happen. You find affirmations and repeat them a lot through out the day with energy and enthusiasm.

You direct your mind using questions to pay attention to those things that help you think and feel better about yourself. You decide to believe in yourself no matter what. You begin with any of these methods and you add to them. You stick with it and you never give up and you never ever quit. The more we do the more we are able to do.

When you decide you will take charge of your mind, your thoughts, your feelings and your actions then be in charge, take control and stay with it until you get where you want to go. If you stumble and fall get up and keep going. We all stumble. The only person to fail is the one who does not get back up.

thoughts cycle to thoughts

Mistakes are part of learning. Falling is part of moving. Getting tackled is part of football game but players don’t quit they keep on moving the ball forward. Do things that are easy enough but challenging enough. Little by little your thoughts take hold, your feeling change your new attitude can take hold.

Fill yourself up with the inspiring material, go to events that are designed to help you feel good and more motivated. If you feel less than glorious, and we all do, once you become aware of it, don’t wallow, but take small steps to alter it toward feeling better. Keep on keeping on.

There is no substitute for action and effort. You will get far more from the effort than you put into it and you have to keep going for the pay off. Results won’t necessarily happen when you think they should but they will happen as you keep with making yourself feel better. Whenever you feel wonderful, enjoy it and be grateful. Whenever you accomplish something that makes you feel proud acknowledge it and pat yourself on the back.

Whenever you do something less than glorious or you feel bad, when you notice it, don’t criticize yourself, instead, pat yourself for noticing what you did and nudge yourself forward. Praise yourself for recognizing what wasn’t working and encourage yourself to move in the direction you want to. Treat yourself as a toddle, encourage yourself in doing the things you want to think, feel and do.

Relax, give yourself time, encouragement and have fun. Play with feeling good and thinking good. Kids learn more in play frankly, than they do forced to sit in their desks. Move, exercise, walk, enjoy! You do any number of these routinely you will notice changes eventually along the way. As you do keep it up. Enjoy it, celebrate and nurture.

Accept that you are human and have all sorts of facets. Remember there are cycles, contrasts, night and day, hot and cold, long and short and as humans we have moments of wonder, enjoyment and delight and moments when we feel less than wonderful. That is part of life. Become fascinated and curious about you might want to do and enjoy and learn. Children chase butterflies and giggle and are thrilled to discover new things.

you can master anything w self control

Train your mind to find the good in any situation by continually asking ‘what is good and new?’ Repetition builds habit so keep do and doing often. You don’t build a muscle do a bicep curl every now and then. You do sets and reps daily. You repeat and repeat and repeat. Through repetition and over time you will get what you set out to get. Whatever you decided to do, to accomplish you will accomplish so be sure to celebrate your accomplishments.

Let go, have fun and enjoy the process. Begin today doing things that help you think and feel better and repeat these. Add to them as you go along. So pick a great book like, ‘The Magic Of Believing’, ‘Think and Grow Rich’, ‘The Magic Of Thinking Big’, ‘Man’s Search For Meaning’, ‘Ask and It Shall Be Given’. Any one of these books, all of them is worth reading and then reading again and again. Re-read this blog over and over again.

Go back through it numerous times because you discover things you miss each time you re-visit the materiaL. Start small, add to what you are able to do and don’t rush or push it. Inch by inch, step by step you get closer and closer to what it is you want. As long as you are inching forward you are making progress toward your goal. Even if you get off track you can adjust back on course and keep moving along. If you stop, you’ve stopped.’

I add here – DO THESE THINGS – Remember you become what you think about. Energy flows where attention goes. Attention goes where energy flow because it is a two way street. What you focus on expands. You are today where your thoughts brought you. You will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you. Skill comes of doing. If you really want to do something you will find a way; if you don’t you will find an excuse.” Rex Sikes

Days are made up of moments. Focus on the moments you can find to delight in!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

Convince Yourself – The Power Of Faith

act as if you already have it

“It is ALL about faith. Either you believe or you don’t. Believe in yourself.With faith you may move mountains. So let’s start moving some.

Whatever you believe you end up repeating and re-living in your mind again and again. You either are  thinking predominantly thoughts of success and well-being or thoughts of defeat. Whichever you do most of the time determines the results you end up getting in life.

‘If you think you are beaten, you are. If you think you dare not, you don’t. If you like to win, but you think you can’t, it is almost certain you won’t. If you think you’ll lose, you’re lost. For out of the world we find, success begins with a fellow’s will-it’s all in the state of mind. If you think you are outclassed, you are. You’ve got to think high to rise, you’ve got to be sure of yourself before you can ever win a prize. Life’s battles don’t always go to the stronger or faster man, but soon or late the man who wins Is the man WHO THINKS HE CAN!” Walter B Wintle

Your thoughts and attitude do.

‘I bargained with Life for a penny, and Life would pay no more, however I begged at evening when I counted my scanty store. For Life is a just employer, he gives you what you ask, but once you have set the wages, why, you must bear the task. I worked for a menial’s hire, only to learn, dismayed, that any wage I had asked of Life, Life would have willingly paid.” Jessie B Rittenhouse

The Bible and many religious texts say, in one form or another, ‘Ask and you shall receive.’ I think we make the mistake when we think  that means we should ask others or ask outside of ourself. I feel it is best when we ask great things of ourselves and expect to have them then we can accomplish great things.

“The greatest danger for us is not that our aim is too high and we will miss it, but that it is too low and we will reach it.” Michelangelo

Perhaps, you will take these thoughts to heart. Believe in yourself, expect great things, fill your mind with ‘can do’ thoughts and wonderful feelings. Then your outer life will be the reflection of your inner one. Only you can make it happen! You will when you decide you will.” Rex Sikes

Enjoy this day whatever it brings.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

 

You Can Torture Me… But You Will Never Imprison My Mind!

determined to help yourself

The other day I quoted Victor Frankl. Today I share some quotes of Mahatma Gandhi, perhaps one of the most influential individuals of the 20th century. Gandhi and Frankl seemed to know, to understand and to really ‘get it’ when it came to our human capacity ability and for self-determination and fulfillment.

Gandhi said, ‘You can chain me, you can torture me, you can even destroy this body, but you will never imprison my mind.’ He, like Frankl, understood that it is not circumstances or what is outside of us that matters, it is not what happens to us , but that which is inside us that makes all the difference.

He stated that, ‘Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.’ Commitment, consistency and persistence is our strength. We can be successful, we can make anything we want to happen when we keep going if we never give up. It is not prowess of the body but prowess of then mind. It is our ability to stand fast and not quit. We may adjust our plans but we don’t stop pursuing our dream.

Winning, or attaining is based on will power and back bone not hoping and wishbone. ‘Indomitable will’ is not a phrase we hear much in our ultra processed, instant on, have to have it fast, cheap and easy world today. Yet, individuals like Frankl and Gandhi, who withstood tremendous pressures from the outside, stated that it was the inner characteristics that give us the edge and make the difference. Gandhi added, ‘Nobody can hurt me without my permission.’ Think about that statement for a while. NOBODY can hurt me without MY permission. Frankl, stated essentially the very same thing.

‘Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.’ When our thoughts, words and deeds are all aligned, targeted and congruent is when we are happy. It is up to us not the circumstances or the people around us that determines our happiness. We do! No one else. We must think, speak and act in harmony.

expereince is how u react

He adds that, ‘A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.’ What he thinks he becomes. The greatest influence in our lives is our own thoughts. We become what we think about! What are you thinking about?

Napoleon Hill stated that “what the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve.’ A definite purpose accompanied with a burning desire, active faith and persistence to see it through is what is needed to accomplish anything one sets one’s heart and mind on. Gandhi agrees. He further points out that, ‘Faith is not something to grasp, it is a state to grow into’.

Hill and others have pointed out, that even a lie repeated enough can become substituted for the truth. If you don’t believe yet that you have the ability to learn how to achieve your goals and dreams, if you don’t believe you have a right to be happy and deserve everything you want in life and that you can actually have it then you need to take charge of how you think.

Hill and the others have revealed that any thought implanted in the subconscious mind by correct repetition will eventually take hold and be acted on.This very same process is how we have developed our limiting beliefs already, anyway.

The difference is that we  can become aware of, and take control of the process deliberately to utilize it for correcing our limiting beliefs and to get great results. We can think, plan, speak, act and create the future we want instead of ending up with something haphazardly or not at all.

whatever we plant in our subconscious

Faith in yourself  is developed by repeated exposure to the notion that you can do anything you set your mind to do. In other words, we develop and grow into faith by repeated application. We accept ourselves as a ‘can do’ person when we continuously think ‘can do’ thoughts.

Hold these ideas of Gandhi and Frankl  in your heart and mind. When you think about them and say them with enthusiasm and energy over and over again, day and night, these thoughts can take hold and become accepted by your unconscious mind as true and can stimulate you on to achieve great things . You will act from them with faith. Right repetition builds positive habit.

Live with purpose, passion and power! Take charge of your life and believe that you can learn to do whatever is necessary to make your dreams come true. Believe that you can and you can! Think about it often. Henry Ford stated, ‘whether you think you can or you think you can’t you are right’.

Align your thoughts with your words and your actions and you will make your life more wonderful than you can presently even imagine.” Rex Sikes

Look for the little miracles that make today marvelous! Celebrate this day!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

Nothing Else Matters!

u r responsible

“Today is reminder day: Everyday only you  can make the decision for yourself to be happy and have a great day no matter what the circumstances are. Be thankful and celebrate everything. Life is wonderful and truly exciting. It is even more so when you live filled with appreciation for everything no matter what. As you celebrate what you have you make room for more in your heart, your mind and in your life. When you celebrate the less than glorious you take the sting out, are more able to find the good hidden in the situation and learn from the experience. You transform the less than glorious into something useful and beneficial.

Pour more good feelings into each moment and you will experience more good feelings than you can imagine. Simply begin by enjoying every simple pleasure. Stop and savor each second. Feel great in this moment and you’ll feel great in the next moment. Come what may find cause to celebrate, to be thankful and feel wonderful. Make this your daily routine, your habit. The more you do this deliberately the more you will find yourself doing it spontaneously. You will have developed a reliable positive habit.

Life is what you make of it! You will feel as good as you choose to feel! Live each day of your life 100% on purpose. Once you realize that create your own happiness and that you are responsible for your own joys and bliss you make it possible to have much, much more. Don’t depend on others and outer circumstances learn to rely on yourself. Recognize that it is your choices that make the difference. Choose to live happily and confidently each day. Choose to expect great things.

It is never what is “out there” or outside of you that  will make you happy. It only seems as though happiness comes from things and other people or circumstances but that is not lasting happiness. That is drifting and allowing external people , events and things to control you.  You don’t have to let those determine how you feel. Happiness comes from within. It is a choice you make in each moment. Once you absolutely understand this your life will positively transform.

To keep you inspired and motivated read inspiring books and listen to audio programs. Put a guard before you mind and tongue and only think and speak good things all day everyday. IT IS A GREAT WAY to begin and end your day with a positive frame of mind. Choose to focus on well-being and delightful feelings. Make your goal to feel wonderful each moment. You can!

YOU can be in charge and determine how you respond to life’s offerings. You can be in charge of your own happiness and you will be happy much more often when you are. You can be the creator and create more happy wonderful feelings for yourself to enjoy. Happiness comes 100% from within.

Remember, you become what you think about! Remember, only YOU determine what YOU think about and focus on. SO live like it. Live as a person with the power to choose. Live as a victor! Live as one who is in charge and who is in control.

How do you do that? You recognize that it is all up to you and only you. Take 100% responsibility for everything good or bad. Make decisions moment to moment, bit by bit as to how you will respond. Claim you power, exercise your power and you WILL live more powerfully. Fill yourself full with so many good feelings there is no room for anything else.” Rex Sikes

Be thankful and celebrate this day!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

Don’t Settle For Less! Begin Now To Transform Your Life Into Something Grand!

your frustrated waiting for flowers u haven't planted

“How is your life going? Are you ecstatically pleased and happy? Are you enjoying your life to the utmost OR is your life not so good? What is life anyway? It is your feelings and thoughts about yourself, your relationships, family, significant others, friends, associates, it is you career or job, your play time, your health, your wealth, you relaxation time. It is comprised of your home, transportation, what you can do, when, where and with whom?

How do you define yourself and your life? Are you pleased or displeased? What are your thoughts about these? What are your thoughts about the world and others around you?

These are great questions! A really great question is what are your predominant thoughts? What do you think about most of the time? What do you think about in each of these areas? How do you think and feel as you consider them? Are you mostly positive or negative? Do you feel mostly joyful or not so good as you entertain these notions?

Do you realize that whatever is going on in your present life IS a reflection of you previous and current thinking? Are you aware that your experience is completely up to you?

What are you feeling most of the time? Do you feel wonderful, just okay or less than glorious?

It is true you determine what your life is. You decide what your experience will be. Each of us does. You may not believe it but stop and look around. Take stock. Examine your life without blaming anyone else for your good or bad circumstances. Recognize, perhaps for the very first time, that your life is entirely comprised of the decisions you have or haven’t made. (Not making a decision is actually a decision). Everything has always been up to you.

If life is wonderful fantastic! Either you know precisely how and why and what you are doing or you stumbled onto something that works and, yet, you haven’t a clue. If life is merely okay and you are getting by or if it is worse, then you are ripe to make some changes. If you want things in your life to change, yup, you gotta change some things.

your habits will change your future

You have to change what you are thinking and feeling and doing. There is no point in blaming yourself OR anyone else that doesn’t make anything better. Just accept the consequences of your thoughts and actions, and realize you made the best choices you knew how to at that time. Realize too, that was then. This is now. Right now, you have the opportunity to begin making better choices. Become accountable and responsible.

The single most powerful thought that changed my life most significantly I first learned when I was eleven years old. It didn’t sink in and make sense or a difference until decades later. Sometimes, we just aren’t ready or prepared to take advantage of great things. I missed plenty of opportunities because I just could not see them.

This one thought that transformed me and my life more than anything else. It was Earl Nightengale’s ‘You become what you think about’. He referenced it in his recording of ‘The Strangest Secret’. He said it was the strangest secret because it was so simple that most people missed it. I certainly missed it for quite some time!

Since that time I have heard and used variations. ‘You get what you think about’, “You become what you think about most of the time’. ‘What you focus on expands’. ‘Attention goes where energy flows’.

All of these are profound ways of pointing out that who you are, what you feel and what you have and do is UP TO YOU and within your control. The point is ‘YOU become WHAT YOU think about most of the time.’

Once I took this simple but powerful phrase to heart I began to change my life and my being. I kept that thought in the forefront of my brain, ‘you become what you think about’ as I took control of my other thoughts. If I can do any part of this you can as well.

what you think about yourself is more important than what others do

As an actor, a young actor I knew that ‘thought precedes doing’. It is the thought that compels you. What the audience sees are the actions you take based on what you as the character are thinking. The same is true in actual life. Thought precedes action. Everything begins first with thought.

We know this is true because all human made things first originate in the mind of the human creator prior to being translated into a physical reality. We see it in our minds eye, perhaps we translate it to paper (plans and blueprints) and share it with others. We manufacture and market and we sell ideas to others.  All the results we get we get because we envision them, good or bad, and we act in some fashion to bring them about. We really are creators!

There is another thought I adhered to which added to the incredible difference self control was making in my life.

That thought is, ‘As long as you say what you have You will have what you say’.

As long as you assert and declare how things are, as long as you think, act and speak from a particular mindset, that is what you will manifest, attract and have for yourself. This particular thought made me aware of what my life story is. Is it positive and filled with what I want to have and include or is it negative and about what I don’t have and why?

Whatever you say you have is what you will have! We are the creators and authors of our experience. Are our conversations and thoughts filled mostly with praise, can do thoughts and building up, or limiting can’t do thinking, tearing down and complaining? It actually matters! What we do most of most often is what we get back. These are the seeds we plant!

Both of these simple ideas led to great change in my life and they can in yours too. These are simple, easy to remember and be aware of throughout the day.

youa are creators

What do you think about most and what do you talk about most? Is it what you want or don’t want? If you don’t have, and aren’t getting and becoming, what you want then you need to take charge, gain control and think ‘more better’.

You and I are already thinking effectively all the time. If we will only accept 100% responsibility for everything we are and aren’t, have and don’t have, then we have an excellent starting place to make things happen. ‘If it is to be it is up to me’, is certainly another idea that matters. All of these thoughts say the same thing in different ways.

Whatever you want it is up to you and it all begins with thought! It matters where your attention is most of the time each day. So take an inventory and determine whether or not your thinking is serving you or hindering you. Once you find out then decide what to do about it. Only you can make the difference for yourself, no one else can.

Take charge, and begin to live the life you deserve to have, the life you truly desire, and the life you can have. Enjoy each moment because you become what you think about most of the time each day!” Rex Sikes

Take advantage of the tremendous opportunities for transformative moments during this day and enjoy!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

You Always Have The Power To Control Your Life

we cant direct the wind

A good book to read is ‘Man’s Search For Meaning’ by Victor Frankl. Mr Frankl survived the horrible conditions of a Nazi concentration camp and yet, he said, no one can ever take away a person’s ability to choose how to feel. He points out what a few already know. YOU always have the power to control your feelings.

You have the power to be in charge and live life victoriously and not to live as a victim. All of us do. Some live this way some others may not.

He states, and he should know, that, ‘Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.’

He also stated, ‘I do not forget any good deed done to me and I do not carry a grudge for a bad one.’ For this man to say this is an incredible testament to the ability to forgive and let go. I previously posted about the power of forgiveness citing someone else as an example. I think this is wonderful. He includes remembering kindnesses.

He says it again a little differently, but he states these from his life experience. ‘Forces beyond your control can take away everything you possess except one thing, your freedom to choose how you will respond to the situation.’

It may be that because of all that he went through he was able to discover his ability to control his thoughts and emotions as he did. The horrible challenge provided him the opportunity to recognize who actually was in charge. Even though circumstances were beyond his control he discovered what he did control and it saved him.

I think for us to do any less with our daily challenges is to not live as we can and as we should. We have such incredible power within! We only need to tap into our own strengths and live with purpose and in charge. We can do this. Difficulty or not we can find our ability to choose.

The final quote I’ll include is, ‘Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.’

we are our choices

I include share these quotes because this was a man who had everything taken away and he survived. He went on to not be a ‘survivor’ but one who thrived. He went on to share his findings with others and to attempt to help others come into their own power.

The reason he could thrive and forgive and love and move forward was because he took 100% responsibility for his response, his reactions, his thoughts, feelings, and actions, not only during the most trying of circumstances but, for his entire life. He understood holding a grudge only hurt him not the object of the grudge. He became aware of a life changing way to live.

He didn’t shift the blame to those outside himself, he placed responsibility squarely on his own shoulders. He spent the rest of his life pointing out that it was this which could made an incredible difference for all humans.

Certainly, it would have been easy to blame his captors, the circumstances, God anyone and everything, but he chose not to. He chose to focus on what he could control. He understood where the true power resides.

Many of us would not blame him or anyone else who is incarcerated and tortured if they complained and hated or threw in the towel. Most of us would accept that is allowed. I don’t post any of this to make any judgements against people going through any difficulty at all. Everyone should still be held in the highest esteem and allowed to be whomever they are without criticism. We should accept all possibilities for how people respond.

u r responsible

Still, Frankl became aware of something greater in him and that was that he was ‘the chooser’. He was the one who decided. He was the one in control and the one with the power and though anything and everything else could be stripped from him no one could take that power from him. That realization alone IS POWER!

Most of us never know the circumstances of a Frankl. Yet, some do suffer immensely. If Victor Frankl and others can come to this conclusion and alter their lives toward the positive we can too.

If we begin to accept our own powers of choice and responsibility then we are able to, as Victor Frankl and others are able to, live our lives more as victors and less as victims, complainers and haters.

There is incredible power and freedom in learning to take 100% responsibility for everything that happens in our experience. I cannot say that I know what this means fully because I have never been tried as he and others have been.

I do know when I take responsibility for EVERYTHING good and not so good in my life, when I face it and not attempt to pass it off onto anyone or anything else something wonderful happens. Some positive changes occur and I find the power and the opportunities to accept it or make it different. Once I accept that it is ALL only in my hands it then is up to me what I do from that moment on. There is immense power and opportunity knowing that you can always choose.

Some people may  feel the need to disagree we me on this. They may think that some things just happen. ‘Bad things happen to good people’, they might say. They may not agree that anyone person is 100% responsible. That is okay.

u have within u whatever u need

What I say in response, is, it doesn’t matter who causes what,  if you ACT AS IF are in charge of your own response to it then you come from the place of a victor. When you assume you are 100% responsible for what and when and how and why and where you respond (even if that isn’t actually true) you are the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. You are in charge.

Even if, in actuality, it ultimately is not accurate that we are in charge of everything, we still would live with so much more incredible power and forcefulness if we acted AS IF we did. It is a mental framework to adopt.

I think Mr. Frankl was onto something and that perception is everything. We see what we believe and what we want to see. We accept our situation either as hopeless and unable to do anything about it or we accept that there is ONE single thing we can control even if we can’t control all else.

We can control our thoughts, our response, our attitude. That right there is incredible power.

happiness depends on quality of your thoughts

What else is the alternative to taking responsibility? That we live as a victim, drifting, without any power or control. That certainly is not how I choose to want to live.

Every single day you and only you can make the decision to be happy. You can decide to have a great day no matter what. Regardless of whatever circumstances arise YOU can CHOOSE how to respond.

You have the power to control your thoughts and determine how things will be. Even when the outer circumstances may remain difficult you can choose how you will go through them. IT is always your choice what you attend to and focus on. WHAT you attend to and focus on determines what your experience is. Life is truly exciting and wonderful!

Enjoy this brief Ted Video of the historic Frankl delivering a talk. It runs about 4 minutes.

Victor Frankl talks on Man’s Search For Meaning

LIve fully today!

 

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.