Category Archives: Forgiveness

Do This Since You Can’t Change The Past

“Have you harmed someone in your present? What can you do to make things better? Have you harmed anyone in the past; physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually? Has someone harmed you? To take care of yourself and move forward you must make some changes.

You cannot go back and change the past. You can however make amends to yourself and others for past wrongs. You can forgive yourself and forgive the others. If they are no longer alive you can release them in your heart and mind. You can change yourself.

Having learned from past mistakes you can change your present behavior for the better. By genuinely doing this you can move forward with a clean conscience. You do whatever you can to correct the situation. You take the actions you can to make things better.

If You Want Your Life To Change You Must Make Some Changes

You release and let go. You forgive yourself for hurting others and yourself. You forgive and let go of others for hurting you. Then having released the persons, the memories and feelings, you can learn the lessons you need to learn from having gone through this.

Ask yourself what you needed to learn from this experience? What is the positive good you get from the lesson of that situation? Discover it and  you can begin to appreciate everything.  Instead of suffering, you let go and begin to move forward positively.

You can begin to create an whole new future. You re-create yourself in light of the positive lessons you glean from the undesirable circumstances back then. Leave the past in the past. Free your mind from any uneasiness. Free your heart. Resolve to do better.

Always Do What You Always Did You’ll Always Get What You Got

Apply the positive lesson and you will do better. Be positive. Learn to feel good. Be grateful. Consider your learning an opportunity and blessing.  You can change how you feel about any circumstance and person by changing what you choose to focus on. It is always up to you. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

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How You Can Get Free From The Past

“Do you live with regret? Are you bothered by ‘if only’ thinking? If only it had been different or if only I had did something differently? Many people are victims of the past. They keep past wounds and disappointments alive in their present. They don’t get past the pain.

Do you do this? If you do, you can be helped. It is time to get present. In the present you can be free from the pain of past and free from the worry about the future. You don’t have to remain the same. You can change, you can release and you can transcend.  So how to do it?

Forgive! Forgive yourself and let it go. You did the best. You can learn from it. You can get the lesson and let the pains go away. Release it. Forgive yourself and forgive others too. You can do this. What lesson did you need to know? What have you learned since?

Can’t Change Past Circumstances But You Can Change Yourself

Forgiveness isn’t about letting anyone off the hook, it is about relieving yourself of past negative experiences. It allows you to let go of the burden you have carried. It means you realize you are not at fault. Nor is anyone else. You release all obligation to the past.

Instead of carrying the hurt from back then, you live free in the now. You turn your attention from what was to what is. It is a new day. It is a new moment. You can live totally free. Pay attention to the good things right now. You can enjoy life in all its goodness, today.

Become willing to forgive. Practice forgiving. Caste your burden on the divine, god, the universe, your higher self or power, so that you can go free. Think, ‘I am willing to forgive.’ As you become aware of this you will find yourself thinking, ‘I can forgive’. Then, ‘I forgive.’

If You Think You Can Or You Think You Can’t You Are Correct

Let go of ‘then’. Experience today, free from guilt, shame, anger, negative or traumatic memories. Live for today. Find the peace you deserve. Find the love and joy you deserve. Realize that bad things help us grow stronger. Learn the lessons. Apply the learning! Let go. Help others. Discover the blessings. Release and celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

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How To Share Transformation With Loved Ones

Have you ever noticed that some of the people closest to you rain the most on your parade? They just don’t get where you are at. They may be very negative and think you are weird. They don’t get your new attitude or practices. They think you have lost it! Right?

Have you anyone like that in your life? You have transformed and experienced tremendous growth and feel on top of the world, moving forward, but some around you want to hold you back. Well, guess what. Most people don’t like change. They want to keep you!

They like or love you and if you change then what?  They want the same ole person they’ve always known. Can’t blame them really, our brains work to keep us the same too. Remember, your inner thermostat always works to keep it at the setting. People do too.

To Be Loved Be Willing To Love And Accept Others As They Are

Sad, but true. That is just the way it is.  We have changed and probably want to share with them and have them celebrate with us. What to do? When we try they get weird and tell us we are not the same person. They may say it nicely or not. What to do? Right?

First forgive them. Let it go. No matter how difficult it seems, let it go. Accept them as they are. You have changed they may or may not have. Allow them to be them and let it go. As for sharing your new found delights keep some things in mind. No one likes pushy.

We have an opportunity to help people who may be in need of what we know that can transform their lives. Isn’t that awesome? You want to share it. Just remember, not everyone wants to hear it or is ready to hear it. You heard it when you were ready, and not before.

You can’t Correct Your Mistakes By Pointing Out Other’s Mistakes

When the disciple is ready the master appears. You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink. Our only responsibility is to lead. Be an example. Walk the talk.  When they are ready then maybe they will seek out what you have. Otherwise, let them be.

When they are ready they will find their path. Meanwhile love them. Bless them. Encourage them. Inspire them. Motivate them, but do not be evangelical. Don’t try to convert or convince. Don’t insist, don’t beg or complain. Let them be who they are.

Prepare a banquet and those who are hungry enough will come. Those who don’t, don’t. Those who come to the banquet may sample and enjoy certain things but not enjoy everything. Some won’t try much, but will eat the foods they already like.

Accept People As They Are Not How You Want Them To Be

Some will explore. Some will skimp. Some will feast. Some will eat and run. Others may stick around for awhile. IT is all good. Whatever it is, it is. Don’t make people conform to you. Allow them to be who they are each moment. Learn to accept. Learn to not be bothered.

Let your light shine. Don’t talk a lot about it to people who aren’t ready to listen. Let your light do your talking, instead. That is more than enough. Be known by your fruits and actions rather than your convincing words. Lead by example. Let your love be an example.

Don’t try to sell or persuade people into being different, but invite them. Then it is up to them whether or not they accept the invitation. Sometimes, if you don’t say anything about your changes they get curious and pester you. They really get curious.

Some Things Are A Mystery Not To Be Solved But To Be Enjoyed

They want you to reveal what you are doing that works and why what they’re doing doesn’t. Wait for the invitation, the request to explain. Then keep it simple and be brief. Don’t overload them with information and procedures. Let them extract it from you bit by bit.

When they are ready to explore more fully they will and you will have been a supportive person standing by with encouragement not someone nagging them to be different from who they presently are. Accept them.  Love them. Allow them to be as they are.

Forgive them. Forgive yourself, and accept what is as it is. It is all a blessing. Live fully and then like moths to the flame, people will want to know what you have that makes the difference. Yes, you can help them. Share it. Don’t push it. Celebrate Everything!” Rex Sikes

Allow and let go today!

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If You Accept It Can You Still Change It?

“So, if I accept what is, does that mean I am stuck with it? Am I giving up if I accept the circumstances? It seems like I am surrendering rather than moving forward? If you have these or similar thoughts you are not alone. Many people wonder what to do and how.

What is IS what is. That’s the way it is. There is no changing that. It IS! You must understand this. You may want it different but it is what it is. Can you accept that? Can you accept the notion that it is what it is and that is all there is. There is nothing else at this moment. It IS!

So, accept it. It won’t help to fight it. You will be going up against the entire universe by resisting it. So stop. Accept it. Recognize that is what is. NOW, having done that it doesn’t mean you can’t do things to change it. First, accept that it couldn’t be otherwise.

The Best Way To Be Grateful Is To Accept Everything

You got what you got! Consider this. You get back what you are not what you want. According to the Law Of Attraction, you attract what you presently are. You get more of the same. Like attracts like. I use the the mirror example. If you frown you don’t reflect smiles.

You get back frowns. If you first accept, if everything is a blessing, then blessings are what you get back in return. If instead, you feel needy, or need something else, then you attract back need. If you resist you attract or create more resistance. So go with the flow.

Get it? Go with what is and accept it. If you have preferences of how it might be otherwise that isn’t the same as having a need or fighting it. Can you understand this? If you think, ‘I’d like to have more fun now’ and you become fun. Then you will get more fun back.

Everything Is Going To Be Great It May Not Seem Like It But It Is

Get it? Become what you want to receive! Accept that your actions are part of this process.  Don’t resist, because what you resist persists. Instead you allow. Accept. Receive.  Invite. Think. ‘I am bigger than my problems. These are there as a blessing.’

Obstacles are an opportunity for you to grow and evolve and develop in ways you would not otherwise do if they weren’t here The reason most people have problems is because they fight them. Embrace problems as blessings, allow them and accept them.

Then you will transcend them. You’ll find an entirely new way of being when everything is a blessing. When every moment is a gift, when every second is a joy, that is when your life is truly magnificent and incredible. You are invincible and unstoppable.

You Manifest And Create What You Want Whenever You Want

Some people mistake surrender and think it means giving up or giving in. I am not suggesting withdrawal or lack of action. You can swat a mosquito if you must. Surrender means understanding that this is the way things are, there may be a reason, or maybe not.

BUT this is how it is right now. You can take action and do whatever you feel inspired, led or intuit to do and move forward. Simply don’t be wedded to the outcome of having to manifest a certain absolute way. Allow for whatever to happen to happen. Get it? Allow!

Not resisting means you do not push back. You don’t fight it. You can take action without fighting. If you are traveling with the current in a canoe you can use the current to steer where you want to go without stopping the current. You go with the flow while steering.

You Always Go Where Your Thoughts Take You

The analogy may not be perfect, but hopefully it helps make the point. If you consider everything a blessing and opportunity you get to work on things and act on things you otherwise wouldn’t. That is a gift! You can create and attract too at the same time. Don’t fight!

Allow. Go with the flow while steering it in positive ways. Be grateful. Fill yourself up with passion and enthusiasm. Delight in everything and you will be attracting and creating more of it for yourself. You will be transforming everything when you celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Be yourself today!

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How To Overcome Shock And Disappointment

“Letting go means dropping it. Don’t seek revenge. Seek to solve and uplift. Consider that every thing happens for a reason and this happened to serve you. It happened so you could get free. Whether ultimately, this is true doesn’t matter. It is a reframe you can use.

Consider it a blessing. An opportunity to learn from and evolve. Be thankful it happened to bring your awareness to what you might change. Accept yourself and your situation as what is. It is what it is. You either embrace it or resist it. What you resist persists.

Find the silver lining. And ask yourself are you capable of giving out some unconditional love? My guess is, an eruption or disruption stems from boundary violations, expectations, restrictions and limitations and not because we are loving unconditionally.

When You Let Go You Create Space For Something Better

When my daughter, my first, was born. I fed her. Held her. I changed her. I bathed her. She couldn’t say thanks. She couldn’t return anything. I did it because I knew it helped her feel good and met her needs. I loved being able to serve her. I remember her birth.

My first thoughts were how blessed and lucky I am. I was given this incredible gift, I thought, ‘I want to love you and accept you as much when you are 16 and telling everyone what an asshole your dad is, as I do right this moment.’ I was head over heels in love. I still am.

As an infant if she cried all night, I held her and decided I was there for the long haul. This was my opportunity. I loved being a dad. So what about when she was 16? It was much harder than I thought it would be because I now expected her to act in certain ways.

You Only Lose What You Cling To – Stop Clinging And Let Go 

I loved her even more but found I placed conditions or expectations on her all the while she was growing up. I did the same with my son. I didn’t realize this was occurring until something upset the apple cart. My goal has always been to get back to unconditional love.

So whenever crap happened I had a yard stick when I became aware of my old habits and programming. Was I behaving in loving ways or exasperating the situation? Was I judging or allowing? Was I labeling or loving? Sometimes, I wasn’t loving. I had to accept and let go.

My desire, my goal, is to remember always, my children are gifts to me. Regardless of what they do or don’t do, give or don’t give, they are incredible blessings in my life that I am thankful for. It isn’t about what they do or don’t. It is about me being blessed and aware of it.

Train Yourself To Find The Blessing In Everything 

Sometimes, my personal agenda causes other people pain. If I am aware, I do what I can to correct it. When I am not aware, I find I blame others. I really don’t want to do that, but sometimes I do. I prefer to take 100% responsibility and change myself instead.

It can be painful to encounter ourselves. We make mistakes. I still do. Whenever possible forgive. Ask for forgiveness, accept, embrace, and make amends. When not, forgive, ask for forgiveness, accept, embrace and learn from mistakes. Let go and improve yourself.

A few blog posts back I suggested showering yourself with unconditional love. I suggest you do that again and again. Also, do it for your loved ones, your friends, even strangers and enemies. It makes a big difference in how you go through the world. Find silver linings. Look at everything as a blessing and all of it can be. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Be easy on yourself today!

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Do This Now If You Want To Improve Everything More Quickly!

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“Would you like to accelerate your personal development? Would you like to be free to enjoy more of all life has to offer? Would you like to feel at ease within yourself, and more comfortable at being you? Could you stand to love and accept yourself more?

The secret to being able to do that and to unlock wonderful things is to forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for anything and everything. Cut your self some slack. You made the best choices, at the time, with the information you had available. You did the best you could then.

Forgive yourself. Drop all feelings of not being good enough. You are good enough. Believe it. Forgive yourself and become free to love yourself.  Let go. If you did something that requires you to make amends and you are able to, do it, and move on. Forgive yourself.

Know Yourself And Be Powerful Accept Yourself And Be Invincible

If you can’t make amends, for whatever reason, the person is no longer living or you don’t know where on earth they are, forgive yourself. People do the best with what they have and what they know in any given moment. You have. You did. Forgive yourself.

Love yourself. Appreciate yourself for forgiving yourself. Appreciate yourself for becoming aware. Understand you are perfect even with perfections.  Cut yourself some slack! Give yourself permission to be who you are. Allow you to be you. Accept yourself. Love yourself.

Celebrate yourself. Be grateful for mistakes because they are the opportunity to learn and evolve. Be grateful for the good times. Be grateful for your body that has sustained you through these years. Be grateful for the people around you because they reflect you.

The Moment You Accept Yourself You Become Beautiful

You are reason to celebrate. You are the reason the universe sings and dances. God needs you as much as you need god. The universe rejoiced when you showed up. Celebrate and delight. Let go and let yourself smile more, laugh more, learn more and love more. Delight!

Think of a row of flowers. Each one similar to the next except different. Each one perfect in its own right. Each one flawed in some way. All growing together bending in the wind. Sun and rain on each. And each one simply being and doing what it is. Living and growing. Forgive yourself. Accept yourself. Love yourself. Celebrate yourself. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Have a blessed day!

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What To Do When You Really Disappoint Yourself!

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“Have you ever let yourself down? Have you ever disappointed yourself? Have you ever done the exact opposite of what you intended to do? Did you ever say, ‘I won’t do that’, only to then do it. I sure have. Countless times. Sometimes, too often.

So what to do when you behave less than gloriously or even badly. You can accept it. Accept that you aren’t perfect. Accept that there are times when you don’t do as you intend. Accept, forgive and love yourself anyway. You aren’t perfect stop pretending to be. Let it go!

Far too often we are harsh on ourselves because we think we should be further along than we actually are. You can see this a lot watching people learn a new sport or activity. They get frustrated because they think it should be easier than it is. They loose patience. I have.

Accept What Is – Let Go Of What Was – Accept All – Allow All

Have you ever done this? I do it all the time. Own it. Live up to it. We take golf swings, throw basketballs, play music on an instrument and get mad when we don’t perform correctly. Knock it off. Stop thinking  you are better than you are. Accept mistakes. Laugh it off instead.

We want to be perfect. We expect perfection even if we think we are a loser. There is no end to how we can criticize and blame ourselves. We will rag on ourselves coming and going if we could. Right? It is time to learn a new way of being don’t you think? You can, you know.

So accept. Let go. Forgive, truly and love yourself even though you aren’t perfect. Love yourself. Then learn. Extract the lesson from the situation. What could you have done differently that would have been more resourceful, productive, beneficial, co-operative? Ask.

Accept The Rainy Days Accept The Storms They Are Part Of Life

Ask of yourself and listen silently for the answer. Examine and reflect. Don’t judge. Stop criticizing. Listen to what you might have thought, felt, said, or acted differently that may have made a difference. Learn from this. Decide to not do the old behavior again.

Intend to be the new way. You may and it might take many practice attempts or slip ups until you finally ‘get it’ and do it or live it. Do you understand this? Repetition is the mother of skill. You made the old way a habit, now you need to be patient while you make a new one.

New habits can take time. So be prepared to love yourself through it. Accept yourself. Keep moving forward as best you are able. You can critique your behavior but don’t criticize yourself for screwing up. You do what you do in the situation and perhaps next time do better.

You Don’t Need To Be Accepted By Others – Accept Yourself

Take the pressure off yourself. This doesn’t give you license to do the old behavior, especially if it involves others, but it gives you permission to be human. Humans make mistakes. Humans don’t always do everything perfectly. It is okay! You did what you did.

If it involves others and you need to apologize do so. Own up. Take responsibility. Learn to communicate more effectively. Build bridges instead of burning them down. I have burned some bridges and in most cases it only hurt me more. Respect others and respect you.

Some times you examine the situation and discover there was nothing you could have done that would have made any difference. You can’t change the physicality of it. Then accept it. If you can change your response to it change your response!

Mistakes Are Part Of Life If You Don’t Make Them You Don’t Learn

When you can’t change an event change your response. Instead of trying to change other people change yourself. You are in the driver’s seat of your mind and your life not in charge of world events or other people’s minds and lives. Let go of trying to control things.

Accept that the ‘crappy event’ was a blessing to learn and evolve from. It may take time to see how but allow for it. I have done things long ago and not so long ago that I may be ashamed of. I have hurt people with my words or provoked others unnecessarily.

I have given the finger to unsuspecting drivers on the road. We all have things we aren’t proud of or that we sometimes do that surprise us. Even when everything is going exceptionally well. Don’t let one act ruin the record of good days. It is like quitting smoking.

Welcome Challenges Every Situation Is An Opportunity To Learn

If you slip up and have a cigarette don’t stop quitting because you had one. Stay quitting. Okay, you slipped up. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and go on. Keep to the program. Get it. Some people abandon everything because of one mistake or slip up. Don’t.

Do stay the course. Keep growing and evolving and living and laughing. Get back on track when derailed. Forgive yourself, forgive others, allow it to be. Accept it as opportunity. You don’t have to know all the answers or the ‘whys’ and reasons.

You may want to but most of everything is a big mystery. Why, heck I don’t know, simply because. Why is what we learned to ask as a child and we keep doing it. The answers aren’t much better as we get older. It just IS! Accept what is. Learn to go with the flow. Allow.

Keep Going Don’t Quit Just Because You Made A Mistake – Persist

Give and receive. Receive grace. receive joy. Receive love. Receive forgiveness. Receive peace. Receive awareness. Give these and more in return. Learn to be grateful. It hurts when things go wrong, or the apple cart is upset, but get over it. Take your time if you need.

Learn that if you love and accept and respect yourself. If you allow and accept what is. You can do the same for others. Whether they return it or not you can still do it. In many cases they won’t return it.

What if you changed for the better yet the rest of the world remain the same? How would you enjoy it? It would be completely up to you then wouldn’t it? It would, right. Everyone else is the same but you chance. Guess what, that is how it already is. You transform.

Forgiveness Is Something You Do For Yourself To Forgive Is Divine

Don’t concern yourself with other people’s personal evolution. Live and let live. When you disappoint yourself imagine you counsel a young person you love. What loving, kind words would you say? What might the child like to hear? What might the child need?

Okay, live and lough and laugh. Feel gratitude even when things go awry. I am always reminded of Jesus, whether you believe it or not, the story is he asked forgiveness for his tormentors while he was in torment. He didn’t wait until all was good, he did it while suffering.

Whether true or a story I think it is a great example. Forgive others and forgive yourself even while in the midst of turmoil. Even when nothing changes in the circumstances. Forgiveness isn’t FOR the other person, it is for YOU. It is for your transformation.

Love Yourself For Who You Are – Friend Yourself – You Deserve To

Transform. You aren’t perfect. You may never be. Accept the good and the not so good as you do the day and the night. Judgement is what makes something acceptable and unacceptable. Yes, there are ways we treat others that may be either. Know which is which.

Live with imperfection. Enjoy being human. Don’t expect to be superhuman or perfect. Don’t live in delusion. Life CAN be great and YOU CAN make your dreams come true THAT isn’t fantasy. Utopia or utopian like perfection is deluded. You can live enlightened.

Be enlightened while the world is as it is. So give yourself room to make mistakes and to correct them. Accept yourself for not being perfect. be grateful for the opportunity to learn, change, correct and continue on. Be thankful for all and celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Make the most of each moment!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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