Category Archives: Forgiveness

How To Transform Troubles Into Amazing Opportunities

horizons the-never-ending-story-phil-koch

“What do you do when you are trying your best to be positive and someone or something comes along and seems to rain on your parade? There are times like that. You decided I will be positive and shortly thereafter find yourself in a funk or a fight. What do you do?

Realize that all great spirits encounter opposition. Obstacles are opportunities to learn and grow. Accept what is IS what is. You can’t push a rope. Understand it takes two to tango. Recognize you part in making it happen or continuing it.

Try to imagine the other person you may be in conflict in as a mirror, or holding up a mirror for you to see what YOU need to change. Learn from circumstances in the same way. Take it as ‘the universe’ is trying to get your attention to help make you a better person. It is trying to help you fulfill your dreams.

Everyone Everything Is A Mirror Held Up So You Can See You

Stop. Let go. Reflect instead of react. Realize what the message is and when ready respond instead. There may always be tough times. Living successfully and happily doesn’t necessitate the absence of obstacles it means learning and growing from them and with them.

Stop blaming others and circumstances. Stop whining and complaining. That is only more fuel for the fire. Accept the blame. Accept the responsibility for your part in all of it. EVEN if you don’t think you have any, look to see how you may be culpable. If honest, you will notice you are a part of it. Accept it. Go beyond it.

‘The kite rises against the wind’. People, events, circumstances are that wind. Your own inner conflicts can be that wind. Remember, when pushed there is push back. When you push back YOU are responsible for your reaction. Be willing to face your part in it.

What You Resist Persists

It takes two opposing sides to fight. The world and you, the other and you. You against you. You against the world or the other. It is normal but you don’t have to fight. You aren’t weak if you don’t push back you are far stronger. You are far superior.

You are far smarter and wiser if you know which battles to fight and which to not. You are far stronger turning the other cheek. Do you realize how much ‘let go’ there is in being able to actually turn the other cheek?  Do you understand how evolved you must truly be to forgive honestly? Seek to be able to do this and you will truly benefit.

Most people don’t actually forgive, truly let go, or are capable of turning the other cheek without resentment. Imagine a world when you could be free enough, secure enough, loving enough, of yourself and others you could do that. You would actually be free!

The Kite Rises Against The Wind

The strong person isn’t concerned with their ego being bruised; does not play one up one down power games; does not try to assert their power in order to triumph over family, friends, colleagues or strangers. That strong person knows there is no need. What is IS.

The strong, wise person seeks to accept, love and understand; to rise above the ‘disagreement’ and realize the stakes each has in it and simply not participate in further aggravating the situation. Yes, it is a road less traveled. That is certain.

How does one disengage when all our hot buttons are pushed and inflamed. When we are hot and emotional. THAT is the ability we need to learn and the only way we learn it is by stepping out of it. We need to become aware when we are a partner to it.

When You Drop Something You Drop It You Don’t Try To Drop It

When we, in that moment, recognize we are part of perpetuating it, we can STOP. I use the analogy of being stuck in traffic. When stuck, you can sit and stew, fighting it won’t change it. It won’t and you know that is true. But what do you do?  You can use the time productively to relax and enjoy. To chill while waiting.

It doesn’t matter if you need to be somewhere. If traffic isn’t moving it isn’t moving. That is what is. Accept it, get over it, get on with living life. There are other things to pay attention to. There are other things far more important and enjoyable than time spent blaming the world because you are stuck in traffic. IF you can’t do anything about it LET IT GO!

The same is true when you are in a hurry. The slow asshole in front of you isn’t that slow, you are that sped up. You are pushing traffic trying to make your way through. Stop. Going faster won’t get you there that much quicker. You are all riled up. YOU are the issue not the traffic. YOU are late because of YOU no other reason.

You Can’t Push A Rope

We can interrupt the pattern. We can stop the cycle. We can take a break, a deep breath, we can stop. We can slow down, walk away. It may take time to cool down completely it usually does. The other may insist on continuing, circumstances may persist but we have stopped. Allow yourself to cool down. Endeavor to keep peace.

We learn ‘let it go’. In doing this whenever we get ‘hooked’, if we can become aware and wriggle free we are learning and evolving. The time between the trigger, getting hooked , and getting free will lessen.

We will learn to let go sooner rather than later. Eventually, we come to our senses because our senses are freed up and not engaged in anger and hostility. Learning to get free and let go and not continue to create drama by participating in it IS A process. We evolve.

Stop Take A Deep Breath And Let Go – Breath – Get Free

More clearly are we able to see. When we are free of anger and stress our brain works better. Our eyes work better. Literally. Stress, fight or flight, constricts our abilities to only focus on survival. It narrows our senses to focus on immediate need.

When dealing with most people, most all of the time, survival is not an actual issue. Though we perceive it as one physically. The brain doesn’t know the difference between a real and imagined image or a real or imagined threat. The brain and body respond the same to a perceived or real image or threat. That is a blessing and a limitation.

So when troubles come your way in the form of a family member, friend or stranger there is something to be learned. When events and circumstances are not to our liking a message is being delivered. Even if that is not actually true, if you act as if it is, you will be better off in the long run because you will become more self aware.

Let Go And Let God

Seek the road less traveled. Find the higher ground. Let go of troubles and woes and do not participate in trauma drama. Seek instead to feel better and help everyone else feel better too. Seek to think and feel positive and happy most of the time.

You can’t if you are upset and cursing the world and others. So ‘let go and let god’, as the saying goes. Trust it will all work out without you trying to manage and fix it. Trust and enjoy that all will be okay if you don’t get hot, bothered and angry. Enjoy, feel good and have fun.

Then you and life transforms. Problems, while there will lessen. You will spend more time able to focus on what you want and not get caught in what you don’t want or want to avoid. You can focus more on what you intend to create. So celebrate whenever you notice.

Deliberate Creation Is To Create Only What You Intend To Create

Use the fact that the brain can’t tell the difference between a real and imagined image to visualize the future you want! See it. Imagine it as if you already have the good you desire. This is how you use how the brain works to get what you want.

Create the future in your mind as a present reality. See it, affirm it, feel it fully! That is how you get it! What you see is what you get. What you say is what you get. What you feel is what you get. Feel how good it feels to live that life in your mind’s eye. Enjoy it!

Celebrate!  Celebrate whenever you become aware and get unhooked and walk away from a fight you need not participate in. Let go and live free. Spend your time in gratitude and loving life. When others and circumstance challenge you realize it is an opportunity to go beyond what you already know and into an entirely new way of being.” Rex Sikes

Make your day magnificent!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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What To Do When Unexpected Challenges Arise And You Feel Fear

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“My blog today is in response to comment left yesterday. It is a piece of a puzzle. It is a first step in a journey. It is a morsel of food in the meal you eat. Without knowing specifics (this is not a request to know) the suggestions I have are general. Absolutely valuable and applicable anytime, but still general.

It may not be what the individual needs to read or hear at this time, and the person may be better served seeking answers elsewhere from someone in person.

Still, the principles are applicable to all of us in our quest for a more wonderful life so I wrote in reply, actually to all of us. Each of us face challenges, hopefully, this will encourage.

The reader commented, and I am always happy when readers comment. When someone reaches out, or shares insight, loves or hates something it is good to know. That is WHY there IS a comment section so you can LEAVE comments!

Here is the comment:

‘I’m facing an unexpected and very challenging situation. And I do feel fear. I agree with what you have written, but my path seems unclear to me. I want peace and a stable situation. (And I have re-written this 9 different ways)……Changing my thoughts will change my actions and change the situation.’

First,  I wish you the best. I am glad you commented. You are doing for yourself and working to make it work for you. That is excellent.

It is not uncommon to feel fear from an unexpected and challenging situation. That is quite normal. It is what we do as humans.

Getting clear about your path is what you do want to do.  When confronted with obstacles we may not know what to do or where to go. Still, in order to journey onward we first need to clarify where we want to end up. Otherwise, we may or may not make any progress.

How would we know if we were progressing if we don’t know where our destination is? Plus, it is important that we make certain we are focused on where we want to go to or end up.

Circumstances can be challenging and difficult, for certain. The learning we all need to acquire is to notice the circumstances but not focus on them. Stop giving the circumstances your attention and energy. Decide what you want instead, not what you do not want.

When you repeat,  ‘Changing my thoughts will change my actions and change the situation.’ while accurate notice what your attention is on. Change the situation. You want to change your thoughts and actions in order to change the situation.

How might you phrase your affirmation to put the emphasis on what you want instead of focusing on the situation? That is where you need to put you emphasis or focus. Think about what you want. Also affirm what you want to feel.

For example, ‘I am calm’; ‘I am confident’; ‘I am able to learn to do anything I put my mind to’; ‘I have peace of mind’; ‘I feel joy’. Whatever you want to think, feel and be. Simply put whatever you want to be after ‘I am’ or ‘I have’ or ‘I feel’. Present tense.

You might also ask Directed Questions™: ‘I wonder how soon I can discover myself easily find more peace and joy throughout today?’ In how many ways will I be delighted and amazed to feel my confidence growing in leaps and bounds?”

You can use what it is you don’t want to help you clarify what it is you do want. Make sure you know what you want and then imagine what you want fully. Whatever it is use your imagination and imagine all the positive good you want to have. Imagine it as though you already have it. It has happened. It is yours.

You want your energy to go where you want. That is why you place you attention on what you want. The work is to keep the attention on the good you want to create and positively have. It takes practice. It does take discipline but anyone can learn to do it in time.

The secret is keeping it there. Going back and forth from feeling positive and confident to doubtful and fearful is what keeps us stuck. We need to overwhelmingly feel positive and confident. We need our focus to be on the good most of the time. Of course, everyone has a negative thought.

As soon as you notice the negative thought or feeling steer it back to positive. Two things happen. One is this is the training we all need. The ability to control and steer our mind and get it to serve us instead of being out master is the skill we need to develop. Two it will make the difference. You will be more positive more of the time!

Make sure what you want is a win/win for you and everyone; wonderful and positive! Place your focus on this. You may not know how to bring it about yet but stay focused on what you want to create. The good you want to create is the good you focus on and imagine throughout the day. This is what you can create!

Feel the good feelings that come with the good you desire. If the world were perfect and your situation resolved and you were your ideal self, being, doing and having what you want how would you feel?

Those are the feelings you want to have more of. Those are the feeling you want to savor and bask in when you think about your destination.

Those are the feelings you want to spend time with. Day and night, and as often as you can, think of the good, see it in your mind’s eye and feel the marvelous feelings. As long as you win and others with there is no disharmony.

What we think about we bring about! If we concentrate on avoiding what we don’t want we just get more of the same. If we focus on what we DO want to create for ourselves we get more of that.

Even though you may not know how it will come about this is what you concentrate on. You think, have faith and affirm that everything will work out for good even though you don’t have any idea how. It is okay not to know how. It really is.

We all need to learn to do this. It is similar to planting a seed. It grows where we can’t see it grow at first, underground. The results of our decision, to focus on the good we want to create, is at first invisible.

We must keep the faith that ultimately everything will work out and that we will be able to behave resourcefully. It isn’t magic or wishing. It is the application of principles that changes the course of our future.

If you decide you want to take boat across the sea to a distant land you have to know where you are going. You determine where you want to end up and you go there. If storms come up along the way you have to navigate through, or around them and get back on course, to get to your destination.

When you focus and believe in yourself you marshall your inner resources. When challenged it is the opportunity to learn lessons and discover the very best within you. The key is to not give up or lose faith. Believe in yourself. Affirm you can do this!

In your present circumstances you may need to find someone who has already navigated the troubled waters, someone who can positively mentor you because they have been there and gone through that and come out the other side successfully. Someone in your area whom you can rely on, confide in and trust. If you need help or assistance reach out.

Inside you is an internal GPS. It knows all the routes and has all the answers you need to get where you want to go. You have the resources to make positive changes, even though you may not be aware that you do, and yet, that can being to easily clear up.

As you keep positive and keep faith in your own inner abilities you may find yourself discovering more of what you need to know in order to move ahead confidently and safely. Trust in yourself to make the wisest choices even though you don’t know what these are yet. Believe in you!

Attitude makes a big difference. This may be just what you look back on some day and are thankful for. If you can cultivate that attitude while going through it you are ahead of the game.

The opportunity to grow and develop comes from adversity. The statement, ‘the kite rises against the wind’ is applicable. Challenge will help you grow in the long run and you will learn a lot from the situation about yourself and your resourcefulness.

I hope, my words help. Understand I have little to go on and I can’t, no one can, solve anything for you. That is up to each individual to do for oneself. I hope, though, in some small way, I can encourage you to stay strong and take everything lightly.

Put into practice the principles you have been learning. Fill your mind each day with positive, inspirational material. Read and listen to positive books and audios. Fill your mind with ‘can do’ messages. Find positive people to encourage and support you.

Manage your self talk and speak only to bless, heal and prosper. Visualize what you want, as already discussed, and grow your faith in your ability to have a positive present and future. Find things to celebrate and appreciate in areas of life, even in the challenges.

Be the victor of the circumstances. Decide to prevail against troubles and to create more love, joy and happiness for all. Determine to live as a champion and stay positive and confident. You will as you keep your focus on what you want to create! It works. It does work. It is YOU who makes it work!” Rex Sikes

PS I wrote this response, then just as I went to publish, it occurs to me that, perhaps, you weren’t looking for a reply. If I made an incorrect assumption I apologize. I say this because I realize that not everyone wants someone to reply, sometimes we just wish to be heard or listened to. Sometimes we just want a hug.

Have a wonderful day!


Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

GETTING CLOSER TO THE NEW SITE LAUNCH  – Inching our way up on getting it up and running. The site will have a new look and feel. If you get this blog emailed to you,  You will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter.

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Do This – Live Well And Enjoy More!

horizons fence and plains

“What must we do to have the life we want and deserve? How do I get unstuck? How do we manifest what we desire? Does what we do make a difference? What should I do to make everything better?Does the Law Of Attraction actually work?

How do I eliminate bad habits? How do we change our lives? How do I live the good life? So many people ask me questions like this. I know they are on the minds of many more. How do we have a great life? That is what these blog pages are all about.

I hope you are going back through them and reading and re-reading them. Make them a study because thoughts and ideas you missed the first time or second time through will present themselves to you each time. You will learn and discover new things you missed.

Everyday is a gift! We never know how much time we have on this planet. It could all be gone tomorrow. Later today it could be over. We should cherish the time we have.

Cherish the people we love and like. We are here briefly and then gone. Some religions have conditioned people that our reward isn’t here but elsewhere at another time.

Live And Enjoy Now

That is really sad. Much of Christendom and many religions preach this.  That is not what I find when I study the Bible or other ancient texts. I see a garden paradise intended for us. I see that abundance of all good things our birthright. It is right there on the pages.

I don’t care what religion you adhere to there is no reason to suffer here. Our rewards are now! Right now while on earth! Maybe there are elsewhere too but the God of the Bible puts our rewards on earth first. Since you are here and reading this – claim your fabulous earthly life. Claim the promise of prosperity and happiness.

Declare it! Believe you deserve it. Unfortunately, too many people have learned the opposite while growing up. They have been sadly misinformed and mistaken. You need to change your mind! Every day is an opportunity to love and to live fully and abundantly now!

Every moment! Each day is an opportunity to learn more and improve yourself and your circumstances.  We only have so much time here so use it wisely, use it well. Use your time to smile and delight more!  Love more, celebrate more and live more fully.

Let go of the past and anything that holds you back. Give it up.  Drop anything that was yesterday and less than glorious. Learn from it and let go of it. Become free! BE free now. Time is short. Let it go!

Embrace the future and put your back against the past. Don’t let anything hold you back or hold you down. You deserve better!Be grateful now! Be thankful for everything no matter what it was. Let it go and be grateful.

Let Go Of The Old

Celebrate this moment and everything in it. You and I are blessed in more ways than we can ever realize. Begin looking for those ways. Open your eyes. Find and celebrate all the good things around you right now!

Forgive yourself.  Forgive those who may have hurt or harmed you past and present. Let it go. Forgiveness is not an act for them it is an act for you. You are not giving anyone else a free pass you are giving yourself a free pass to move on.

Never be held back by less than glorious circumstances. That is the big lie. You can move beyond it and be free. Heal yourself through forgiveness and gratitude!

Wait patiently and expectantly. Seeds plant grow under cover of darkness. Most of what sees do we never see. We never see how growth occurs we only notice benchmarks in progress. Be patient and know good things come to those who wait.

Don’t give up keep moving forward. There IS a time to harvest. You will discover so many wonderful things if you let go, forgive, celebrate now with gratitude and be patient.

While waiting stay in the present. Stay focused on your blessings right now. Parts of your brain will attempt to get you to think about the past and regret it to protect you from doing that again.

Write A New Story

There is a noble intent to regret and that is to not ever engage in that same behavior or activity again. The brain will also project into the future to protect us by anticipating what might be coming. Worry is noble too in that it is an attempt to prepare.

There is nothing, absolutely nothing, wrong with the brain attempting to prevent the past mistakes or avoid future ones but some people get caught up and miss right now.

Now is where all the blessings are. Right now is where the celebration is. Right now is actually all you have. The past is gone only memories we relive and the future is only a projection, it is not here yet.

The gift is our present. Staying in this moment helps keep us calm and peaceful. Enjoy and delight in this moment. In each moment.Life is meant for you to enjoy! You have a short shot when all is considered. Live it well.

It doesn’t matter so much what you have as it matters who you are. Be the kind of person who savors and enjoys life. Dream big and live large. Have fun, smile and laugh. If you fill each present moment with so much positive enjoyable living you will have lived well! Don’t you think?” Rex Sikes

How wonderfully can you spend today?

If you like this post and it helps you – help others by sharing and re-blogging.


Horizon photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

NEW SITE TO LAUNCH SOON – Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new URL is coming soon. The site will have a new look and feel.

If you get this blog emailed to you, I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter.

Stick with me. I’d hate for you to miss anything when it switches.

PS A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

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You Need A Power Team And Here Is Why!

horizons roadway double yellows

“The world goes on no matter what. It doesn’t slow down for us one bit. Sometimes it may seem as if we just don’t have enough good juice to handle it all. There are ways, of course, practices and principles you can apply. Would you like to know an important one?

If you can only sit peacefully in meditation atop a mountain somewhere, removed from the noise and the hustle and bustle, then you haven’t really learned how to quiet the mind. One should be able to live meditatively anywhere. Meditation is perfect for living where conditions are less than desirable. Try it. You may like it!

There are circumstances we enjoy and those we dread. There are people who are good for us and those who are toxic. I am a firm believer that we should be able to rise above anything or anyone who is a problem. Just as with meditation we should not allow ourselves to be brought down because of outside influences.

There are those people who are good for you to be around. These are the people who love and appreciate you. They encourage and support you in positive ways. They help you nurture your goals and dreams. They enjoy who you are and allow you to become who you want to be.

These people respect and value you. You respect and value them. Together you feel more alive. These are people to spend more time around. It is good to surround yourself with positive energy and good feelings. Decide who these people are in your life and treat them like gold. They are resources to you and you can be the same for them. Together you form a positive power team. Embrace it.

Relationships like this are wonderful to develop and grow strong. Your team may be people you already know or people you meet soon. When it comes to new ones choose friends you are proud to know and have in your life. Choose people you admire and respect; people who walk their talk, because actions speak louder than words. This is critical. Do they live it?

You want people in your life who are nice to you and you are nice to them. It is important to reciprocate love and kindness. Notice what you appreciate in others and let them know. Tell them. Be their cheerleader too. Support them in their pursuits. Cheer them on to greater heights. Be genuinely thankful and happy when they succeed and move forward. Be thrilled for them!

Help them in their endeavors. Small or large it doesn’t matter. The more you help others the more they will help you. Go first when it comes to giving. Be a gracious and available receiver. What goes around comes around. Be honest and reliable. Keep your word. Be the kind of person you want others to be.  Care about them. Let them know how much they mean to you.

If an issue or misunderstanding arises be slow to blame and quick to forgive. Forgiving means don’t let resentments get the better of you. Put things back into perspective. Let go. If you have some incredible relationships with quality people seek to preserve these. It is desirable to have a great core of quality people who inspire, motivate and support each other.

There is a synergy that occurs when like minded people come together. There is an exponential effect when two or more are gathered. Together you create more than each person can individually. Together you may accomplish great things. Together you can live, love and laugh more. Together you form an oasis in the world. Celebrate your positive team of friends and family.” Rex Sikes

Make today make yesterday pale by comparison.

If you like this post and it helps you – help others by sharing and re-blogging.


Horizon photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

NEW SITE TO LAUNCH SOON – Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new URL is coming soon. The site will have a new look and feel.

If you get this blog emailed to you, I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter.

Stick with me. I’d hate for you to miss anything when it switches.

PS A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude! Leave comments.

This Is Why You Are Here!

horizon pink flowers and barn

“Life is precious. Life is short. Make someone smile. Say a kind word. Give someone a hug. Help make meaningful moments and positive memories. Today they are here. Tomorrow they might not be.

Make it a point to only speak to bless, to heal and to prosper. Uplift and encourage. Leave a person better off than you found them. It is easy to do. Remember to do it. Maybe, that’s why we are here.

Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath. Don’t go to sleep angry. Make peace. Grudges are silly and toxic. Forgiveness is free. Love because we only get to for a little while.  A very little while!

If you remember anything remember these. The people around you are your resources, strangers, friends and family, and you are theirs. There is only one people in all the world. All lives matter.

Help make our world a garden paradise. Let’s aim high. We are here to experience joy. Let’s help each other do that. It is easy to be kind. Pay it forward. Bless, heal and prosper all. Include yourself!” Rex Sikes

Have a fabulous day!


Horizon photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

NEW SITE TO LAUNCH SOON – Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new URL is coming soon. The site will have a new look and feel.

If you get this blog emailed to you, I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter.

Stick with me. I’d hate for you to miss anything when it switches.

PS You may know someone who could benefit from reading these message. Please share DI&G with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

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What Should I Do When I Screw Up?

horizon footsteps in snow

“Have you ever let yourself down? You wanted to do one thing but did another? You made some progress in a given area only to fall back into old behaviors? Have you disappointed yourself? Has this ever happened to you?

A coaching client of mine came to me frustrated stating, ‘I struggle to stay positive. Sometimes I am able. Sometimes I succumb to less than glorious thoughts and feelings. I let myself down in my program. I am frustrated and feel bad. Sometimes things are great and sometimes all hell breaks loose. It shouldn’t. I disappoint myself. What to do?’

The following constituted my answer. Happily, by applying these insights this person got over many hurdles and has gone on to accomplish some really fantastic things in career and life.  You can do anything with the right mind set. Remember, all things work together for good!

Forgive yourself

Be gentle, be kind and be accepting. It is okay. All things are possible. You are on a journey. There is no expectation of perfection. Forgive yourself and continue on. When you fall get up.

The only thing that happened was that you fell. Don’t judge it. Don’t be critical because you fell. Be thankful you didn’t get very hurt. If you did nurture yourself and take care to heal.

If when you fell you hurt others. Get up. Own up. Apologize and make amends. Make good. Take responsibility. Look them in the eye and assure them it won’t happen again. Do your best to keep your promise. AND keep your promise!

None of what I am saying is about letting yourself off the hook if you did wrong. It is all about responsibility and taking care not to repeat. There are ways to do this that move you along further more swiftly and there are ways that keep you stuck and repeating mistakes.

I want to help you discover how you can more easily and readily change in the positive ways you desire.

Nothing Is Wrong In Falling Down

Nothing is wrong about failing to do what you hoped to as long as you stay with it. If you quit, if you throw in the towel and give up, then, yes, you failed. You stopped by your own choice.

If you are going to do that then forgive yourself. You made a decision. Accept it, own it, be responsible for your choices. It is entirely okay. That is what you decided. Give yourself some credit.

Do not blame or criticize yourself or others. If later, you decide to try again so be it. If not, so be it. Just accept that you have the power to decide. Decide to live without blame and criticism. Decide to live with love and light and life. Decide to celebrate everything.

Everyone Falls Down Sometime

So what? Get up and go on if that is what you chose to do. As long as you continue to assert yourself, as long as you attempt to continue you are learning and growing. You are a work in progress. Make many mistakes. That is fine. Attempt not to make the same mistakes more than once.

If you make the same one again and again keep working to change it. Realize you have some efforting to do and accept it. Focus on what you want instead of the mistake and gradually you will make it less and less. You need to develop some new habits and new ways.

Aim at what you want. Stop trying to avoid at what you don’t want. When you slip up for self and others do what has already been suggested. Make good. Don’t criticize yourself and move forward.

You are growing and evolving. Accept that wherever you are IS where you are. It is right where you should be given the choices you have made. All systems require correction. Your thermostat changes and corrects for temperature fluctuations. It gets feedback from environment and makes adjustments.

Use Changes As Feedback And Course Correct

So if you make a mistake, or you get off your chosen course you correct it. Don’t judge, correct and move forward. Don’t add insult to injury by criticizing yourself for being human. Being human means getting up and falling down and getting up again. Any negative commentary is unnecessary.

If you find yourself commenting in negative ways stop it when you become aware of it. Don’t go into a recursive loop of criticizing yourself for criticizing yourself. Many people do this and it is unfortunate. Stop blaming it does absolutely nothing of value.

Free yourself of this and go on. Love and accept everything about yourself and stop judging your progress. Don’t try to be further ahead. You will get there when you get there. Accept and continue to move forward. Comparisons can cause pain. There is no need to compare.

Step By Step You Get Closer To Your Destination

Bite by bite you get nearer to completing the meal. Drop by drop the tub is filled. You will get there. Don’t let mistakes, obstacles, challenges or influences bring you down. If they do, accept it and move on when ready. Ease up on yourself.

The sooner you keep going the easier it is. ‘Get back up on that horse!’ and keep on riding. Soon enough you will get the hang of it. We may always make mistakes, so what? We may always have difficulty, so what? Expect the best of yourself. Remain optimistic. Be positive and have faith. You can do it.

Accept That You Are Wonderful

Through it all we can learn to and have an incredible life. We can be filled with light and life and love. We can celebrate all and our joy can know no bounds. As you positively progress, as you become more aware, congratulate yourself for the positive changes.

Acknowledge, validate, celebrate and be thankful. Encouragement in the positive direction will help you move forward faster. Delight and live with more joy. Make this part of your purpose. Have fun.

It is all within each of us, the capacity to discover your true nature, your true power and your true gifts. You will find that you are absolutely worthy and deserving. No need to think otherwise. You are wonderful, accept it and enjoy it!” Rex Sikes

Discover what is good and new about today and have some fun!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS  A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  COMING VERY SOON –  Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this and new content will be at new site. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. You will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. Please stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

What To Do When Things Go Terribly Wrong!!

horizon sky and water

“What do you do when things are going right and then whoops everything seems to be going wrong? What does a positive thinker do when they screw up and make a mistake? Do they feel bad? Can they, should they? I have been asked this question a lot over the years.

Recently, a situation presented itself, that allowed me to address these questions again. I hope you discover the answer within as you read what I share next.

I received a call from a couple who are coaching clients of mind. They hit the Wall of Woe and were on their way to a Pity Party when they dialed the phone and reached out.

Problems Have Seeds Of Opportunity Within

They had an argument with their son. They felt they had pushed him into it and were afraid they had lost him. Their concern was that he might move out and they did not want it to come to that.

Their anguish stemmed from feeling he was taking advantage of them. They were willing to do almost anything for him and it seemed he did little in return. After much asking and begging him to take some responsibility around the house they had it. They got mad.

Friends were more important to him. He would do anything for his friends but provided almost no help around the house. He overslept a lot and broke agreements regularly. They know he is a teenager but after a while of this they had had it.

They let him know they were very upset. Now they were afraid they had pushed him too hard and far. I was glad they called. They were at the end of their rope with guilt and shame. Dad felt awful for yelling loudly and Mom did too.

It Is Okay To Be Human

We all have opinions about parenting style and responsibility. We all have rules and ‘shoulds’ for ourself and for others. They felt they had done wrong but weren’t completely wrong in doing so. They felt conflicted.

They felt they should have and could have handled it differently. They knew they were pushing hard at the time and now they feared. I am not sharing what we did regarding that. Every situation is handled uniquely and appropriately for the client.

Many of my coaching clients are business leaders, filmmakers and actors and individual men and women (married or otherwise) but I do consult with a some couples. I am not discussing their parenting here but I will tell you some of what I shared with them regarding their feelings.

We all hit that wall from time to time. It is natural. Life has ups and downs. There are rhythms to everything. We all have the ability to disappoint ourselves and hurt others without meaning to. We are human and most of us feel the hurt deeply. We also have the ability to feel marvelous.

We Make Mistakes – Accept It – To Err Is Human

It IS okay to be a positive thinker AND have a bad day. It IS okay to be working on improving yourself AND slip up from time to time. It IS okay to be human! A positive thinker is one who seeks to find the positive in a situation. Sometimes that is difficult or takes time to recognize.

Attempting to be perfect is not be natural. All emotions are part of the human condition. It is okay to feel hurt, disappointed, angry, and guilt. It is normal to feel any and all of them. So accept what you did. Take responsibility for it and when ready move on.

Make good when you can, if you can. Apologize if an apology is needed or will help the other person. Process what happened and how you are feeling and move forward when you are ready to move on. Forgive. It may not do anything for the other person but it will help you.

Allow all the feelings, allow what is going on. If you cry, cry that is fine. Whatever occurs allow it. When ready move on. You feel it and when it is over let it go. The waves come in but they also go out. Guilt is good if it keeps up from repeating a behavior that may be harmful to self or others.

Allow  Let Go  Move On

Feel enough quilt to get the message. Resolve to be different and let go of the guilt. It did its job. Do not hang onto emotions needlessly.It is no longer required. Some people have great difficulty in living normal, well-adjusted lives. Just be you! Feel it and let it go.

The more I learned to manage my thinking and my emotional states the less time I needed before I moved on. What used to take days, or weeks or longer now takes a much shorter time. Sometimes days, hours, minutes or seconds. Sometimes it takes longer too. It is whatever it is. Whatever it is – it is the right thing, the right amount.

There is no right or wrong amount of time to spend processing hurt or loss. Allow what feels natural and right. Don’t blame yourself or others. Don’t be harsh and critical of yourself. You made a mistake. It is part of being human. We all make them.

Treat Yourself Gently

Be gentle, respectful, kind and loving of yourself and the other party. When ready aim your thoughts and feelings back toward the positive. Steer yourself again into a powerful position. Look for the smiles and feel the gratitude. Focus on what you want.

Celebrate the learning from the recent situation. I’ve discovered that truly all things work together for good. Blessings and delights are always around the corner. Sometimes we just can’t see them. Turn back to gratitude and celebration. Dwell on good things.

Some times our darkest moments become our finest hour but we don’t know that while going through it. UNLESS – unless you condition yourself to begin to always think this way.

Learn Patience

Your awareness increases through your daily commitment and experiences. The longer you practice positive thinking the better equipped you are when things go wrong. You more easily recognize that all challenges also present opportunity.

Then you may be more prepared for difficulty. We become what we think about most during the day.Then when upset occurs you know  it will pass. There will be reason to celebrate and be thankful through all of it.

Perhaps, this couple and their son needed this exact exchange. For whatever reason. Perhaps not. Who can say?  As long as they love each other and are willing to forgive each other they will do fine. It may take some time or it could resolve quickly.

Make New Mistakes

Great good can come from these circumstances if they are willing to look for and become aware of it. It is obvious this family does deeply love and care for each other. As long as they seek to accept and understand each other they will be fine.

We all would be better if we put these principles into practice with our loved ones and friends. Be patient with yourself, others and circumstances. Remember, this problem will pass. Cultivate Patience!

Yes, positive thinkers can stumble and fall. Everyone falls! Not everyone gets up. It is in the getting up that victory is born. Get up, shake the dust off and move on. Everyone makes mistakes. Accept it, correct it as best you can and move forward.

Learn from it so you don’t make the same mistake again but make new ones each time. Never try to be perfect. Just be who you are. Who you are is already someone wonderful. Celebrate and be thankful for everything in your life. Be glad to be human!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy this beautiful day!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so. If you benefit from these words please help someone else benefit too.

PSS  A great thing to do is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

What To Do When You Lose Your Temper

no excuses - when you really matter

“Have you ever lost it? Have you ever behaved opposite of how you wished or hoped you would behave? Have you ever been totally fine, even cool, when, for whatever the reason, you lost your cool, you were no longer fine and you exploded?

The next thing you know you are ranting or wailing and that is not ever what you wanted to happen.

Stop! Take some deep breaths. Just stop and breathe. Walk it off. Give your body a pause and move it to utilize the adrenaline that has flooded your system. Allow yourself to settle.

Shift your focus to things you enjoy. That is why they tell you to count to ten to distract yourself. So you create a pause. Shift to things that you enjoy and want to make happen. Relax your focus on what wasn’t working.

Let it go. Later, return and look for solutions. Learn from the moment. Think (manage your self-talk). I use affirmations such as “everything works out for me’, ‘no weapon formed against me shall prosper’, ‘all things work together for good’, ‘great things are coming to me even though I can’t yet see what they are’. Fill your mind with positivity!

Have you ever lost it? I SURE HAVE. I have lost it many times. Sometimes everything is going well and bam, something happened and I lost it. I lost control of my temper, or emotions. Sometimes it seems everything sucked and finally, bam! I lost it.

Take Responsibility

I have I admit it. I take responsibility for it. When it happens I am not necessarily happy about it but I accept it. I have learned not to regret it or shame myself for it. However, if it involves another person, I do the responsible thing and apologize and attempt to make good on it.

If no one else is involved I apologize to myself and make good on it.

I accept that it happened. I move on. I steer back to center and intend for a better day. I go inside my mental movie theater and make adjustments. I watch the situation unfold, i rearrange it, change it, free myself from it and program myself for future positiver behavior instead.

I have learned that when I lose it I am focused on the wrong thing. I am focused on what I don’t want. If I have lost it I have gotten caught up or hooked by what I don’t want in that moment.

When I become aware that I was caught up I acknowledge that I got hooked and celebrate that I noticed. I extract whatever learning I can from the situation and move on. Less and less I get caught up as a result. I lose it less frequently altogether. Life is much more what I want and intend it to be.

Shift Your Focus To What You Want

Still, every now and then are moments. These moments teach me a few things. We are all human, we all make mistakes.  Don’t linger in the crap but return swiftly to the golden moments and opportunity. Be responsible and do the right thing. Accept the consequences of your actions.

I learn I am more in control than I think and yet, I should never consider myself a hotshot or two big for my britches. I also know that it doesn’t ever help to make excuses, whine or blame others even if they actually were the cause.

It does nothing to assign blame. You’d think it would bring satisfaction or some sort of better feelings, or relief or resolve but it doesn’t. Blame is its own form of punishment. I prefer not to get hooked twice.

I realize that if I lost it there is a lesson I haven’t learned yet. I look for what that lesson might be. I think I find it and maybe I do. On the other hand, perhaps, the lesson I found isn’t the one and there is still more to learn.

There are few people who can get me but they still are there. I used to think it was about them. I know it is an opportunity for me to transcend being  ‘gotten to’. They are there to test me and provoke me so I can be better.

What You Resist Persists. Let Go

Do I think this is accidental or by divine design, nope. It just is. Anyone is free too conclude or believe what they wish as far as I am concerned.

Would it be easier if these ‘trying’ people went away. Perhaps, but if I am not free others might just take their place. So I might as well learn to get over these people, or these events, situations, and circumstances! Whatever it is, persists until I stop resisting.

It is like my blog about traffic and surrender. Whatever is is. You can resist, fight and cause yourself and others pain (sometimes I do) other times I surrender, relax and accept. I think more and more it is all about surrender. Letting go and going with the flow.

I think ultimately you learn to create your future the way you want so you can relax about the past and forgive and let go, so you can enjoy whatever the present presents. If you can live and celebrate everything, really celebrate and appreciate. no matter what, then life is absolutely amazing!

The more I find this moment perfect, whatever it is, the more I enjoy each moment. I can still intend to create beautiful things for tomorrow. I can intend health, wealth, well-being and a happy future without losing sight of the glorious now.

Being human means ups and downs. That seems to be the way it is. It seems everything is in flux. Happily there is change and we can change too. I’d hate to think we were predestined.

Be Flexible, Be Forgiving  Be Kind

I look at Bible stories sometimes and find messages and comfort. I look at all sorts of philosophical text. One story comes to mind. The story of Lot and his wife. Many people think it about sin and punishment.

I think of it this way. The ‘sin’ was the old way. I’m not calling it good or bad.  It was the old way of doing things. Lot and his family turned from what they didn’t want, the old way, and toward what they did want.

They left, traveled, moved toward the new. They left the city representing the old way of being and doing (what they did not want) to head to a new destination (what they do want).

Lot’s wife looked back and was frozen in a moment as a pillar of sand. She froze while focused on the old way. She got caught by what she did not want.

Okay, maybe this is not what the story is about at all. But it could be.

When we take our eyes off where we are headed we freeze. We can not move forward looking backwards. We have to keep moving in the positive and worthwhile direction.

Create What You Want Don’t Get Caught In What You Don’t Want

We need to focus on what it is we want and not get trapped by what we don’t want or negative circumstances. Keep our sight on what we want to create that is good and new.

If we fall we get up. If we make a mistake we correct it. Abusing ourself or others with harsh words and bad feelings does not help. Nor does it benefit to treat ourselves with harsh words. Be gentle and kind.

We all make mistakes. We all get hooked noe and then. It is okay. We are human. If we had no possibility to fail we would be robots. We would have no choice. We could not create. We would never learn and our enjoyment would be limited.

Because we can fail we can also triumph. We can celebrate all. We can be victorious and fill our life with greater meaning. We can delight in all things. We can live fully no matter what. I’m glad we have choice. I’m happy we can make mistakes and correct them. It means we can do anything!” Rex Sikes

How often can you smile today?

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Stop Living In Pain! Connect The Dots To Feeling Better

suffer more in imagination than reality

“Have you ever played connect the dots? You know, you start at one dot and follow each until an image emerges. Will you do it with your life? Can you look back and see how each event that stands out in your mind and each decision you made has lead to where you are right now?

At each historic event in your life there may have been many pathways to alternate results. Can you see how your decisions at each point have lead you to where you are today? Can you see that? While it may appear there were any number of possible choices and outcomes can you see that given your decision you are right where you are supposed to be?

I do not mean you were predestined nor do I mean someone other than you is dictating the outcomes. What I mean is given the choices you have had in your life can you, or are you willing to see, looking back, how the decisions you made were stepping stones to the present?

I’ll give you an example. I had someone I deeply loved who broke up with me as a young man. I was horribly crushed. I didn’t want a future without her. Had she not broken up with me I would not have the incredible children I have today.

While it may be true I may have had other children and been happy had we stayed together we did not. What I do have are two children I love and adore and could not be happier as a result. Do I mourn the breakup now? Absolutely not.

I had a car accident that kept me laid up for a long time in a part of the country that wasn’t my home. As a result I eventually met the woman who became the mother of my children. Had I not had the terrible car accident I would never have had these children.

Do you see what I mean? Now, in these examples it appears I am only pointing to events outside my control. Things that happened to me. That is part of it. It is what the universe offered. Events happen. Inside of each I made countless decisions that affected my present at that time and the future outcomes.

For example, I stayed after recovery to have the relationship that lead to my children. Had I chosen to return home and not continue the relationship I would not have my kids. I had to give up certain things in one part of the country to have other things in another part of the country.

One of the points I am trying to make is that each dot leads to another and the entire picture emerges but we don’t see it all at one time. We don’t know the eventual outcome. How we view each dot is important. I could abhor my present and look back and see how each dot has lead to now, and how I might have decided otherwise.

No point crying over spilt milk. Yes, you or I may have decided otherwise at anytime but did not. Get over it is the only thing to do. We can not, nor should we, regret the past. If we can’t change it we should find a better use of our thoughts and our time.

We can use those feelings though to decide to change our present and have a better one. We can determine to have a better future too. This is when past exploration is useful if it leads to a set of wiser choices in the now that we can make.

Otherwise, sifting through the crap in our lives, living hurt and disappointment over and over again is a pointless, devastating use of time. A key to having a happy life is knowing how to use your mind to look for and find what you want. Another key is knowing how to spend your time doing what brings you those results.

Look into the past and recognize choice points. Notice how upheaval events, big boulders, are the stepping stone to now, and without them you would not be who you are today. Whether or not you successfully negotiated those, whether or not you appreciate the outcome they are part of your history.

Therefore, they have helped determine who you are today. For goodness sakes be grateful!!!

Without them, perhaps, everything would be different. However, there is NO without them. They are historically in you past. Examine how those events, no matter how horrible, have contributed to you. You have lived on. Days, weeks, maybe years have passed since that time, those times. Appreciate this!

If you are dragging the boulders with you everywhere you go that is a difficult way to travel. You need to put them down and let them go. You need to examine how, no matter how terrible they may have been and how life crushing they were at the time, those very events are disguised blessings. Appreciate this too!

Inside each were, as there always IS, choice points we face. There are always decisions we have to make. In each decision we made, whether the result was better or worse, is the seed of opportunity for betterment. Find the seeds! They are within the dots!

Whatever we did, however we chose, brought us to right now. If you don’t like where you are right now, maybe you can imagine, whether true or not, a greater force trying to get your attention to make better decisions. My guess, it is not coming from outside you but from within you. YOU are trying to get YOUR attention.

Negative feelings are your way of signaling YOU that you need to make a change. They are telling you you are focused on the wrong things. You are focused on what you do not want. The signal value will get as loud as necessary for you to hear it and change things.

Some people, instead of recognizing the signal and changing what they are doing, live with the negative feelings. Imagine, a messenger shows up at your home and instead of taking the message and acting on it you invite the messenger to live with you. Some people tolerate negative feelings and pain instead of making change that benefits them.

They are simply mistaken. The don’t realize the feelings are there to get their attention The feelings are yelling “HELLO! IS this bad enough yet? HELLO, HELLO? okay well then we’ll ramp them up and see if this get’s you to pay attention. HELLO HELLO!”

On and on it goes as a vicious cycle because the human isn’t aware of why those less than glorious feeling are there. They are there so you DECIDE to change your focus. That is all they truly are! Use them don’t continue to be abused by them. Stop and change what you are paying attention to. Stop paying attention to the negative thoughts and feelings!!! Use the feelings only as a guide, as a messenger!

You can’t change the past but you can use the past to change what you are presently doing so that you get better results. Part of this evolutionary self change means reframing the past as necessary. Look at it and assign different meaning to it.

Assign a more useful and productive meaning to it. Notice how each dot follows the other in some way as a road map to now. Find the good in each disappointment and you are doing something incredibly valuable for yourself! You will transform the past when you find the good. The result will be a better present and future!

You don’t have to live in regret and personal woe. At this moment there is a choice what to do with the past. You can keep hurting or you can decide to live happily and victoriously. Even considering these notions is a choice point for you. What will you do?

I hope you will look at each moment meaningfully and positively and find the good that has come from each disappointment. Sadly, many people miss all the positive, incredible, stepping stones in their life because they only see the boulders.

That is narrow, limited vision and no way to live. One only lives that way because they made looking for what is wrong a habit. You can change that! There is plenty of wonderful events and good too that should not be missed. Habits should serve you you should not serve habits.

Silver lining surround every dark cloud but we have to look for it. We need to find the good. Train your mind to find the good, especially if you have never trained it to do so. If you have not deliberately trained your mind to find the good, to see the positive, to celebrate everything, then you won’t. Make it a habit!

Your mind will run on and on doing whatever it learned to do haphazardly and carrying out the programming given it by others. That is not how you want to live and use your mind. Claim it back and train it to find the strength, the confidence, the happiness and joy that are there that you are missing because you don’t know where or how to look. You can do it!

This moment is an opportunity for you to take control, resolve the past, forgive and let go. It is an opportunity to make the present marvelous and move into the future with confidence, power and joy. It is the opportunity for you to create what you want instead of living as you don’t want.

You always have choices whether you know it or not.  Only, you have to decide. NO decision, to not make one, is actually a decision to do nothing. Waiting is only waiting. Someday never comes, today is all we have. You and I can live it positively, happily with an attitude of gratitude for everything that came before and what we have now.

When we are grateful for everything, truly grateful, there is immense power within you to create and attract anything and everything you want. You become a magnet for blessings, opportunities and advantages. Celebrate everything!

You live with purpose, deliberately using your thoughts and feelings to have fabulous day no matter what crap the world hurls your way. When you are grateful for everything. When you are grateful for every decision you made, regardless of the outcome, you are beginning to take responsibility for you. When you can take 100% responsibility for you is when the miracles begin happening!

Then nothing is left up to chance, nor to anyone else. You are the captain of your life and the master of your fate and the creator of your circumstances. You become more fully alive and dynamically charged. There are no blames, no excuses only celebration and gratitude and this is an incredible way to live.

You can have it all when you decide to take charge. When take responsibility for all your decisions, your thoughts, feelings and actions you are the master of these and your life becomes magical! It is absolutely wonderful. Yes, crap may happen, but life is wonderful.

Won’t you do this now for yourself? “Rex Sikes

Be good and kind to yourself today!

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You Screwed Up! How To Get Over It!

your best teacher your last mistake

“You screwed up! Big or small? It doesn’t matter. We all make mistakes. The big question is what to do when you do make a mistake? How do you keep going?

Okay, this won’t be the first time you heard this. You are human. Humans make mistakes. That is what we do. That is how we learn. From our earliest moment we are screwing up and it is informing us and teaching us.

BUT since we went to school we hate messing up. We hated those red marks on our tests. We were told everything we did wrong. SO we developed an aversion to it. We developed a fear for making mistakes.

We responded out of sorts. We don’t like it. We are afraid of it and feel bad when we screw up.

Stop Focusing On Mistakes

If we focus on what we don’t want we get more of what we don’t want. If we spend time worrying about making mistakes it is more likely we will make them.

If we think ‘don’t screw up’ it is not any different than telling a child ‘don’t spill your mill’. You know what happens when we do that.

Focus On What You Do Well

You have to live fearlessly and expect the best. You need to plan for success and not let mistakes bother you so much. You are so much more than your occasional screw up.

You do more things right than you do wrong. Celebrate that! Embrace this! Accept it! You do plenty of things well and quite well.

How We Learn

As a child you learned to roll over, sit up, crawl and eventually walk by making more movements than were necessary. These movements were way off base. They weren’t at all close to what you need to balance or move forward easily.

When you learned to feed yourself you repeatedly missed your mouth with the spoon getting food all over the place and yourself. You made movements way off base.

You never thought to call them mistakes. They were! They were necessary for you to eventually hone your skills and get the food in your mouth. They were necessary for balance, movement, navigation.

These are called Unwanted Parasitic Movements. Name sounds horrible but you needed to learn how to stop doing them in order to get the spoon to your mouth, for you to sit up, crawl and walk.

They were absolutely required. They were larger than necessary, not even closed to the refined movements you learned to make because of them. It is like coloring outside the lines. You went outside the lines while learning to color inside the lines.

You learned to eliminate all that was unnecessary in order to refine and perform these skills. You got rid of these unwanted parasitic movements to smoothly navigate the spoon to your mouth.

It was all done through repetition. It was all learning. It was all ‘not that way but this way’ when it came to aiming your arm and hand to your mouth.

When you watch an infant sit notice how much it moves as it is learning to sit comfortably still. The infant is learning to balance from all these extraneous movements.

Good thing you couldn’t talk or think about it as you do now, you’d have quit after the first or second try, starved to death and would not be reading this blog.

Accept Mistakes As Part Of Being Human

Mistakes are part of evolving, growing, developing. If you deny making them or get caught up in thinking about them, over thinking about them or worrying about them you will only be miserable.

You will stagnate and prevent yourself from learning valuable lessons. You will make it tougher on yourself. Pat yourself on the back when you make a mistake and say to yourself, ‘You did the best you could. Better luck next time’.

Realize we all make them and they are a part of life. Embrace yourself, forgive yourself. Embrace your mistakes, forgive yourself for making them. It is absolutely ok.

Yes, there may be consequences and you may need to make restitution for your mistakes that should be understood. That is part of the process.

Don’t shirk your responsibility when a mistake affects others. Ask forgiveness do what you can to rectify it. Be positive and proactive. Do not let it ruin you. Make good on it and get over it.

Mistakes Make You More Attractive

People like people more who are able to forgive themselves and admit their mistakes. It actually makes them more attractive. There is the story of a popular television entertainer who was supposed to run up a flight of stairs during his TV special.

He stumbled and fell. The producers said, ‘don’t worry we can edit it out’. He said ‘leave it in’. He understood that it would make him more human and that the audience would feel for and pull for him seeing him falter but continue to go on. And he was right!

Happy people know this inside. They know that making a mistake is actually a learning experience and an opportunity. Since we all make them and it is probable we will continue to make them the best approach seems to be relaxed acceptance.

Don’t get bent out of shape. Keep moving forward. The more you can celebrate mistakes the less the sting. When you are able to embrace and accept, acknowledge, learn and move on your life takes on a much more wonderful quality.

When you give yourself permission to screw up or fail it takes the sting out of it. You will find yourself hurting less and feeling better more frequently. Attitude is important. It makes all the difference in the world. Keep on making mistakes and keep on learning and growing!” Rex Sikes

Have a wonderful day!

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