Tag Archives: Self Improvement

Stop That! Do This Instead! It Makes All The Difference!

horizon grey swirl cloud

“Have you ever wondered why you keep getting the same ole, same ole? Have you ever been concerned with why you seem stuck and can’t advance very fast in career or in life?

If you don’t like your present circumstances and wish they would go away then you need to understand how you are contributing to getting what you do not want.

Go back and re-read that. Yup, you may be contributing to precisely what you don’t want.

If you are screaming ‘NO!’ at what you do not want you are NOT pushing it away. You are giving it energy. You are actually attracting and creating and feeding what you do not want.

Whatever you are trying to leave behind, escape from or get over, whatever you attention is on, you are magnifying and making bigger and perhaps even worse. Certainly, you are getting more of the same.

Whatever has your primary attention; whatever you focus on, think about, puzzle over, worry about most is what runs the show. What ever is most dominant in your mind, most of the time, is what you are feeding and putting energy into and growing more of.

Those are the very seeds you are planting. Whenever you whine, blame, criticize yourself or others you are planting negative seeds that will grow and blossom as sure as anything else.

Whenever you spend time feeling dour, sour, negative and yucky you are keeping everything the same and then getting more of it.

Whenever you are doing something that isn’t working to get you the results you want two powerful words come to mind: STOP IT!!!!  Then START focusing on what you do want instead!!!

In order to change and get more of what you want you have to be focused on and say ‘yes’ to what it is you DO want. You have to know what it is you DO want and focus on this. You do not focus on what you do not want or what you are trying to avoid. PUT ALL YOUR ENERGY AND ATTENTION ON what you want!!!

You have to feel good and delight in it. Feed the wonderful thoughts and feelings and those will grow and blossom. Nurture the best, the finest, the most wonderful and you will get more back in return.

Use your imagination to visualize what you want, see it and enjoy it! Speak nicely to yourself and others. Feel the most wonderful delicious feelings. Let yourself feel grand and delight in all things!

Stop paying attention to all that is wrong and troublesome in your past and your present life. Stop worrying about what is wrong in the world and start celebrating and noticing what is right.

Put your energy into positive, happy, wonderful moments. Emphasize these when you talk about your life and the world!

Appreciate what you have and who you are and what you do. Celebrate, feel blessed and keep your attention on the most wonderful thoughts and feelings and you will get what you want.

You will attract, feed, create, make happen all the good things. Don’t you think it is about time you get what you deserve to get? Enjoy life and feel blessed!” Rex Sikes

In how many different ways do you think you can amaze yourself today?

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS  A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  COMING VERY SOON –  Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this and new content will be at new site. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. You will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. Please stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Without This You Are Like A Ship Without A Rudder

blue-horizons-phil-koch

“Does it seem like you work hard and still get no where? You put in effort for a long time but it seems you are spinning your wheels? Are you going around in circles? Do you have difficulty moving forward consistently? Perhaps, you advance a couple of steps only to fall back a few more. Is this you?

Today, I would like to paraphrase a couple of Napoleon Hill’s powerful analogies. I love Hill. If you haven’t read his works yet, I heartily suggest that you do.

Hill states that a person needs to have a Definite Purpose in order to succeed. One should be absolutely clear about one wants and intends to do. It should be clarified and written down and enthusiastically read out loud at least twice a day.

You Need To Have A  Definite Purpose

Print it out and put it somewhere you will look at it a lot during the day. Keep it before you on the outside AND on the inside. In your mind’s eye see your goal as already accomplished. Feel what it is like to enjoy having what you want. Savor and bask in these feelings. Make them intense. The stronger they are the better it is. Hill says ’emotionalize’ your definite purpose!

Without a Definite Purpose, Hill states, you are like a ship in the middle of the ocean that loses it’s rudder. The ship struggles along going in circles, getting no where fast. All it’s efforts do it no good. Soon it will exhaust all of its power, all of its energy, and it will not make it to its destination.

Hard work alone will not get you where you want to go. You can work hard and get no where at all. Working hard without the correct specified mind set IS like being that ship without the rudder. You need to be able to steer your efforts appropriately based on what you absolutely want most.

Know what you want. Think success first. Get your mind set right. Feel successful. Become confident you can do it. Then all of your efforts will be aligned with your mind set and will valuable. Specify your purpose and steer your ship. Then all of your energy is aligned and utilized correctly to move you to the place you want to be.

Hill’s other analogy is marvelous! He uses it to illustrate the power of Organized Effort. Organized Effort is where all of your talents and abilities, resources and plans are aligned and congruent with your purpose and working in harmony. This is how you maximize your efforts to make your dreams come true.

Harness The Power Of Organized Effort

In an experiment, you most likely have conducted sometime in your life, or at least you’ve seen it done, you take a magnifying glass. This glass represents your Definite Purpose. Aim the glass at definite spot on a piece of paper. The glass focuses the sun’s rays and harness it’s power and soon the paper bursts into flames.

Without the magnifying glass focusing the sun’s rays on a definite spot the sun can shine on that same paper for millions of years without anything happening.

Determine your Definite Purpose. Know what you want. Feel good about it. If it doesn’t make you feel wonderful it isn’t for you. Focus your attention and direct your energies and efforts so you can move forward productively. You must have a purpose first or you will get nowhere. Notice Hill emphasizes your mind set over and above your actions. From your Definite Purpose you make Organized Effort.

Hill states these three things are necessary to succeed. The first is to know what you want. Have a Definite Purpose. Second, concentrate on it so that it becomes a Burning Desire. Your definite purpose occupies your thoughts day and night resulting in incredible, intense feelings. Third, take Appropriate Action through Organized Effort.

Have A Burning Desire

When your mind set is correct and your are passionate about achieving your goals then you be able to take the appropriate steps to making it a reality. Your thoughts and feelings will be in harmony. When these are aligned you are better able to create plans and work your plans. You will know the right steps to take. Everything begins to fall into place.

When you put these three principles into play you stop spinning your wheels and start advancing your goals and dreams. When you concentrate your energies and attention you make them available in your daily life. You become what you think about. You become clear, passionate and powerful.

You create and attract like minded people who resonate with your attitude and presence. You are better able to utilize resources and notice opportunities, events and circumstances that can help you. You transform yourself first and your life transforms with you.

Thoughts And Feelings Come First

You become the magnifying glass able to harness and focus the power to make your dreams come true. Once your mind set is correct and your definite purpose energized you are on your way to making it reality in your everyday life.

Remember, Hill said write it out and repeat it out loud enthusiastically, passionately at least twice a day. Energize your purpose. Feel great about it! Keep it in your mind. Affirm it. See it, hear it, touch it, smell it, taste it. When you hold it in your head you will someday hold it in your hand. Go for it and keep at it! Never stop!

If you have been working hard with not much to show for it realize now that transformation begins within. It is what you do on the inside that’s most important. Get that right and the rest will fall into place. Presently, you may have had the cart before the horse. It’s time to make the necessary change and create the life you want!” Rex Sikes

Have an incredible day! Enjoy!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS  A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  COMING VERY SOON –  Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this and new content will be at new site. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. You will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. Please stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Who Else Wants To Have More Fun & Overall Enjoyment!

horizon cloudy and lighting

“Would you like to have more fun and overall enjoyment? Would you like to accelerate your own personal evolution? Would you like to find ways to make changing more fun and easier than ever? If you answered yes then are you willing to do it? It is simple enough and easy enough. All you have to do is be sure to do it.

Fun and delight come from what you put your energy into; what you focus and concentrate on and what you spend time doing. You can increase the amount of enjoyment exponentially by doing these following easy things.

If you haven’t yet read my previous post about asking Directed Questions™ or any of my posts on this topic you may wish to do that now or when you finish this post.

Whether you make declarative affirmation statements or use Directed Questions™ two things are critical. Sincerity is one. You must honestly ask. Be curious. Be sincere when you make the statements.

Even if you don’t fully believe them, yet be sincere and feel good. When you take on the attitude of a child you get out of your own way. Be open, curious, available, eager and enjoy!

Questions are an immense help when you aren’t able to fully believe an affirmation. Rather than declaring something that feels off to you ask questions on how soon you might begin to fully accept it. Ask questions that eventually lead you into believing.

Trying to repeat an affirmation that makes you feel less than glorious is not the right thing to do. Feel great when you affirm!

Feel good! Feel incredible! It isn’t the words that are the most effective. The words help paint the pictures in your mind. You want to use words that enable you to easily visualize. You want to be able to imagine your goals and dreams completed, feeling wonderful. The words are an important part but not the most important part.

The feelings are most important! Emotions drive the subconscious mind. Whether happy or sad, glad or angry your feelings inform your subconscious what to pay attention to and respond to. This is why so many people get what they don’t want. They think about what they don’t want while emotionally agitated and the subconscious goes ‘okay your wish is my command!’.

Feel good when you affirm and ask questions to direct your mind. This is powerful information. Use it!

Feel your best. Feel enthused, eager, delighted, joyful, confident, relaxed or peaceful. The stronger the emotion when asking or affirming the better. The quicker they work. Emotions are the key! Your goal should be to feel the very best you can most of your day. All of your day. Make it a habit!

It’s easy and fun when you are feeling your finest! Everything works together and it is like greasing the wheel. Enjoy and delight in it!

While that isn’t always possible there are things you can do if you get off track and need to get back on track. See other posts in this blog about steering back to center when needed. Keep in mind that feeling best for as often and as long as you can IS life changing.

Find reasons to be grateful right this moment. Find reasons to give thanks and celebrate everything in your life now and you will feel better much more of the time. Make it a habit! Bring your awareness to what is good right now! Live in this moment! Feel alive. Ask yourself, what is good and new? Look for it and you WILL find it!

Learn to manage your thoughts and emotions and you will begin to live like a champion. Your inner mental images, your self-talk and your feelings will all be aligned and congruent.When congruent you are on your way to making your dreams come true.

That is when it is ‘full speed ahead!’ More and more your moments will become wonderful! You will find more to enjoy and more that is meaningful!

Doing these things will produce wonderful feelings. The wonderful feelings you have will make you want to do it more. It begins a marvelous cycle. Doing means feeling good means doing means feeling good. Keep it up and you positively enhance your daily life!

You make it a habit it when you correctly repeat it again and again over a period of time. Develop great, powerful, positive habits.

Everything works together when you are feeling your finest. Do what you can to feel wonderful. State your affirmations and ask your Directed Questions™ in the most powerful, positive emotional states you can experience.  Think the best, only speak the best to self and others and feel your best and magic will happen!” Rex Sikes

It is another incredible day to enjoy!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS  A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS  

*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  COMING VERY SOON –  Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this and new content will be at new site. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. You will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. Please stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

 

Now! You Can Overcome Difficulties & Have A Life Worth Living!

horizon and whispy clouds

“Can we live a life worth having? Can we love and enjoy being loved? If we have only one go around then why not find the way to enjoy it and others as best we are able? Can we create a wonderful life and a wonderful world for everyone?

These are questions I find important that we ask ourselves and the purpose of this blog is to help us ask questions that bring us more wonderful results and answers.

Commit to making a change for yourself, commit to your goals and commit to asking yourself new sets of questions. Doing this will help you be happy and able to succeed beyond your wildest expectations.

You might ask the following samples and you might create your own:

I wonder how exquisitely talented I can become? How quickly will I begin to learn these new skills? In how many different ways can I express my confidence appropriately? How easily can I find my self being able to make these changes now? In how many different ways will I be delighted to look back and realize I was able to readily accomplish my goals?

How come I am so lucky? Why am I so wonderful? What are my very best qualities? How soon will I begin to notice myself feeling more surprised and delighted each day?  What new wonderful things will I discover today that can and will amaze me? How soon will I notice myself smiling and laughing more? How much fun can I discover?

I wonder how quickly and easily I can achieve my ideal weight by eating right and getting the right amount of sleep and exercise? How can I become thinner while enjoying the process? How soon will I find myself naturally eating the foods that are healthy for me? In how many positive and powerful ways can I picture my ideal self?

I wonder how delighted I will be as I begin to notice the many different ways I am feeling better and better? How naturally and easily can I begin to pay attention to the most pleasant, wonderful positive feelings? Which sensation in my body feels the very best right now? What can I pay attention to that makes me feel loved?

How delighted  can I become to naturally notice myself feeling more vibrant and alive? How many great feelings can I discover? In how many different ways can I powerfully imagine myself successful? What are the many different ways I can begin to notice my life becoming more and more wonderful? What am I most grateful for?

How quickly and easily will I begin to talk nicely to myself in ways that make me feel grand?  How easily can I see myself feeling incredible having accomplished my goals? What are the best feelings I can feel today? How soon can I begin to notice and pay attention to the many different ways I am blessed and feel absolutely thankful?f How soon can I notice everything always works out well for me?

You can substitute pronouns. For example you can ask yourself or another person the any of the above questions or the following:

How soon will you begin to notice with absolute delight how happy you can become? Do you realize how exciting it is going to be when you take this vacation? In how many different ways are you going to enjoy it? What do you imagine will be the most fun for you? Isn’t it wonderful to be able to relax and let go?

Asking questions of yourself and others directs the mind to areas it is most useful, positive and beneficial to focus on. You aren’t looking for ‘an’ answer you are allowing your brain to find examples. Birds of a feather flock together so the brain comes up with more and more.

The more you ask the more you can find and delight. These are samples. Create your own. Ask repeatedly. The more you ask the more quickly you will benefit. Soon you will find it becoming a natural and automatic habit to look for the good and the new  in your experiences. Remember, we become what we think about!

Questions are useful in feeling better, learning new behaviors and skills easily, overcoming difficulties and discovering new opportunities and advantages you may have been missing. Asking the right questions repeatedly in the right way directs the mind to look for numerous ways to evolve yourself or solve your problems and resolve your difficulties gently. Take it easy and enjoy asking!

You will readily begin to direct your attention and yourself in positive and powerful ways. Right now, notice how well these work to direct your attention and the attention of others in positive ways. Ask nicely! How you ask is as important as what you ask. These types of questions are especially wonderful with children and teens!

I have shared Directed Questions™ since 1980. Countless numbers of people have benefited positively and powerfully by learning to direct their minds. You will too!

So what can you do today for yourself and for others that will put a smile on your face and on theirs? More tomorrow.” Rex Sikes

Have an incredible day!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS  A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS  

*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  COMING VERY SOON –  Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this and new content will be at new site. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. You will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. Please stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Do You Keep Doing This Without Taking The Credit?

horizons horses

“Do you know what most people seem to miss? It is right there, right under their nose and yet they miss this critical piece. Somehow they just don’t realize, or if they do, they don’t own up to it.

Most people seem to miss that they have choice. They miss that they are making countless decisions day in and day out based on choices. The are making some very deliberate conscious choices and many subconscious, unconscious choices.

Meanwhile, they think they are a victim of circumstances. I’ll tell you what you can’t change. The weather. If it is going to rain it is likely it is going to rain. If it is going to snow it most likely will snow.

You can’t change it but you can chose how you will respond to it. You have a choice. You don’t have to like it or dislike it you can chose how to feel about it. It is completely up to you.

What is needed is for each of us to see and to realize that we are the person who is doing the choosing. You are determining what you put in your latte. You pick your route to school or work or how you get there. You choose what you have to eat.

You may say the donut called out to you and you could not resist but no one held your arms down and force fed you the donut. It only seemed that way. Right there is the key. It SEEMS like you don’t have choice but you actually do.

You live as if you don’t choose but you are choosing all along. IT JUST DOESN’T SEEM LIKE IT because you have gone about it without awareness.

Take stock of how many decisions you make each day. Write them down keep a tally. How many decisions do you make from hot or cold coffee to the large ones that influence you and others? Become acutely aware of each and every time you decide something.

Be tough on yourself don’t let any sneak by you. DO your best to notice each one. Become accustomed to the many decision you make. Take a few days and track all your decisions. Record all of your choices. Notice all the choice points in each day.

Discover that you are making decisions. You are deciding between alternatives. You are choosing. Recognize this and realize this. Take responsibility for the decisions you made. Claim your power do not give it away.

Do not give it to others, events or circumstances. Take responsibility (another decision). Decide to live as someone who chooses. Live as a victor, a champion. You are at the mercy of no one and no thing. Stop giving away your power.

Some will claim it isn’t them choosing it is their brain choosing for them. That somehow they don’t have control. That is a habit, a choice you made that you keep making over and over until you lost that distinction. Now you make it automatically.

You can learn to make new habits and make new decisions. Might it be tough? Sure it might. It might be easy. You decide. What is it going to be? Stop making excuses or blaming and start living from your power. If you don’t know where that is yet, decide to look for it.

Decide to keep looking until you find it and befriend it again. Decide to keep going no matter what until you get what you want. Decide to stop living in fear and failure and live in confidence and success.

You say you don’t know how. Well, decide to learn how! C’mon stop playing around and take charge of your life. No one and no thing is running your life but you. You may not have been very great at it up until now but you can be. Tomorrow is a new day.

Decide to learn to run your life better. Decide to fill your life with fun, passion, confidence and ecstasy. No one can live your life for you. Don’t you think it is time you start living your life for yourself? It is your decision. Make it today!” Rex Sikes

Celebrate each moment!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS  A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS  

*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Want To Make Good Things Happen To You & In Your Life?

horizon snow fence post shadows

“Who doesn’t want to have more of the good things in life? Don’t you? If there were a way to get it would you take that way? What would you give up to get the life of your dreams? Some people want things without really wanting them very much. They don’t do anything to make their dreams come true other than wish. Sadly, wishing won’t make it so.

If you’d like to make good things happen to you and in your life you need to focus on good things. Your thoughts must remain positive. You must know what you want to create and include in your life and support that with your thoughts and actions.

You need to hold  these good, positive things in your mind because energy flows where your attention goes. You direct the flow of energy by what you pay attention to. That is why your attention must be riveting on the positive and the good things you want.

You can’t be wishy washy and expect stellar results.

Positive or negative? It is always your choice. Focus on the good you get good. Focus on the positive you get positive. YOU make it happen. It is always up to you.

Which side gets most of the energy?  Positive or Negative? The one with the most energy runs the show. The results you have been getting are an indicator. If you aren’t getting what you want you aren’t focused on it in a way that works.

Your feelings are an indicator. If you are feeling less than glorious most of the time you are not focused on being positive most of the time. It is simple. It is straight forward. It is clear!

The more positive you are the more you get back. The more negative you are the more you get back. You become whatever is most predominant in your life. If you are stuck you are waffling, drifting, your are 50/50.

Do you want more love? Focus on and concentrate on being more loving and giving more love. Do you want to be happier? Focus on being happy and making others smile too. Do you want more success? Focus on being successful and confident. Encourage and support others. Do you want to be debt free? Concentrate on abundance, feeling rich and be grateful for what you presently have!

You need to concentrate on what you want more of. You need to focus on what you want to include in your life. You do not get wealthy thinking poor thoughts. You do not get healthy thinking unhealthy thoughts. You need to put your attention on what you want and keep it there no matter what the present circumstances are around you.

To move forward the way you want to you need to be concentrated on the positive most of the time. That is just the way it is. You need to be positive in your thoughts. You need to remain positive in what you imagine in your mind and say to yourself.

You must be feeling good most of the time. Think 80/20. At least 80% of the time you should be thinking and feeling positive. Your attention and energy should be positive. Then you are in that wonderful creation space. You want the good life? You can absolutely create it. Take control of you thoughts!” Rex Sikes

Today is a day you can delight in!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS  A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS  

*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

What To Do When Things Go Terribly Wrong!!

horizon sky and water

“What do you do when things are going right and then whoops everything seems to be going wrong? What does a positive thinker do when they screw up and make a mistake? Do they feel bad? Can they, should they? I have been asked this question a lot over the years.

Recently, a situation presented itself, that allowed me to address these questions again. I hope you discover the answer within as you read what I share next.

I received a call from a couple who are coaching clients of mind. They hit the Wall of Woe and were on their way to a Pity Party when they dialed the phone and reached out.

Problems Have Seeds Of Opportunity Within

They had an argument with their son. They felt they had pushed him into it and were afraid they had lost him. Their concern was that he might move out and they did not want it to come to that.

Their anguish stemmed from feeling he was taking advantage of them. They were willing to do almost anything for him and it seemed he did little in return. After much asking and begging him to take some responsibility around the house they had it. They got mad.

Friends were more important to him. He would do anything for his friends but provided almost no help around the house. He overslept a lot and broke agreements regularly. They know he is a teenager but after a while of this they had had it.

They let him know they were very upset. Now they were afraid they had pushed him too hard and far. I was glad they called. They were at the end of their rope with guilt and shame. Dad felt awful for yelling loudly and Mom did too.

It Is Okay To Be Human

We all have opinions about parenting style and responsibility. We all have rules and ‘shoulds’ for ourself and for others. They felt they had done wrong but weren’t completely wrong in doing so. They felt conflicted.

They felt they should have and could have handled it differently. They knew they were pushing hard at the time and now they feared. I am not sharing what we did regarding that. Every situation is handled uniquely and appropriately for the client.

Many of my coaching clients are business leaders, filmmakers and actors and individual men and women (married or otherwise) but I do consult with a some couples. I am not discussing their parenting here but I will tell you some of what I shared with them regarding their feelings.

We all hit that wall from time to time. It is natural. Life has ups and downs. There are rhythms to everything. We all have the ability to disappoint ourselves and hurt others without meaning to. We are human and most of us feel the hurt deeply. We also have the ability to feel marvelous.

We Make Mistakes – Accept It – To Err Is Human

It IS okay to be a positive thinker AND have a bad day. It IS okay to be working on improving yourself AND slip up from time to time. It IS okay to be human! A positive thinker is one who seeks to find the positive in a situation. Sometimes that is difficult or takes time to recognize.

Attempting to be perfect is not be natural. All emotions are part of the human condition. It is okay to feel hurt, disappointed, angry, and guilt. It is normal to feel any and all of them. So accept what you did. Take responsibility for it and when ready move on.

Make good when you can, if you can. Apologize if an apology is needed or will help the other person. Process what happened and how you are feeling and move forward when you are ready to move on. Forgive. It may not do anything for the other person but it will help you.

Allow all the feelings, allow what is going on. If you cry, cry that is fine. Whatever occurs allow it. When ready move on. You feel it and when it is over let it go. The waves come in but they also go out. Guilt is good if it keeps up from repeating a behavior that may be harmful to self or others.

Allow  Let Go  Move On

Feel enough quilt to get the message. Resolve to be different and let go of the guilt. It did its job. Do not hang onto emotions needlessly.It is no longer required. Some people have great difficulty in living normal, well-adjusted lives. Just be you! Feel it and let it go.

The more I learned to manage my thinking and my emotional states the less time I needed before I moved on. What used to take days, or weeks or longer now takes a much shorter time. Sometimes days, hours, minutes or seconds. Sometimes it takes longer too. It is whatever it is. Whatever it is – it is the right thing, the right amount.

There is no right or wrong amount of time to spend processing hurt or loss. Allow what feels natural and right. Don’t blame yourself or others. Don’t be harsh and critical of yourself. You made a mistake. It is part of being human. We all make them.

Treat Yourself Gently

Be gentle, respectful, kind and loving of yourself and the other party. When ready aim your thoughts and feelings back toward the positive. Steer yourself again into a powerful position. Look for the smiles and feel the gratitude. Focus on what you want.

Celebrate the learning from the recent situation. I’ve discovered that truly all things work together for good. Blessings and delights are always around the corner. Sometimes we just can’t see them. Turn back to gratitude and celebration. Dwell on good things.

Some times our darkest moments become our finest hour but we don’t know that while going through it. UNLESS – unless you condition yourself to begin to always think this way.

Learn Patience

Your awareness increases through your daily commitment and experiences. The longer you practice positive thinking the better equipped you are when things go wrong. You more easily recognize that all challenges also present opportunity.

Then you may be more prepared for difficulty. We become what we think about most during the day.Then when upset occurs you know  it will pass. There will be reason to celebrate and be thankful through all of it.

Perhaps, this couple and their son needed this exact exchange. For whatever reason. Perhaps not. Who can say?  As long as they love each other and are willing to forgive each other they will do fine. It may take some time or it could resolve quickly.

Make New Mistakes

Great good can come from these circumstances if they are willing to look for and become aware of it. It is obvious this family does deeply love and care for each other. As long as they seek to accept and understand each other they will be fine.

We all would be better if we put these principles into practice with our loved ones and friends. Be patient with yourself, others and circumstances. Remember, this problem will pass. Cultivate Patience!

Yes, positive thinkers can stumble and fall. Everyone falls! Not everyone gets up. It is in the getting up that victory is born. Get up, shake the dust off and move on. Everyone makes mistakes. Accept it, correct it as best you can and move forward.

Learn from it so you don’t make the same mistake again but make new ones each time. Never try to be perfect. Just be who you are. Who you are is already someone wonderful. Celebrate and be thankful for everything in your life. Be glad to be human!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy this beautiful day!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so. If you benefit from these words please help someone else benefit too.

PSS  A great thing to do is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Who Else Knows What Precedes Career & Life Success!

horizon shadows and fence post

“How is your career going? How about your life? Are you as happy and successful as you would like to be? If yes, that is fabulous! If not, why do you suppose that is? If you ask people this question you discover some pretty insiteful answers that all tend to be the same.

Most people will tell you that they just can’t get a break. They are spinning their wheels. They can’t get past a glass ceiling. They state that the economy or the world has changed and hence it is impossible. They say they don’t know what to do.  They have tried many different things. Nothing seems to work.

People answer saying it isn’t their fault. Something or someone outside of them is preventing them. They are not responsible. Most people answer as if they are passengers on a bus in life rather than as the bus driver. Even then some drivers blame the road and conditions.

Attitude Determines Altitude

Too many people take a passive stance to their success by putting in other’s hands. They feel like circumstances or others dictate what their life and career will be like. In Hollywood it is, and was, always easy to blame the ‘gatekeepers’. Gatekeepers are those we perceive that keep some from making it while allowing others access. Never let the notion of a gatekeeper prevent you!

When you aren’t getting the results you want you must make an active change. Yet, most people think you must change what they are doing. They want to change an activity. You should but this is not the first thing you must change. You must first change your mindset! Thoughts precede action. When you get your thinking right right actions will follow.

You must create the successful, winning, champion mindset first.  From this mindset all else follows. Think like a winner and you can become a winner. Think like a champion and live as a champion. Take responsibility for making your career and life what you want it to be.

You Go Where Your Thoughts Take You

Stop blaming and stop looking at the less than glorious circumstances. Stop putting your energy and efforts and attention on what you don’t want and focus entirely on what you want. Get your attitude up. Make you attitude right! Persist in your right thinking in spite of any obstacles.

You have to think, ‘if it is to be it is up to me!’ Once your mind is set in right thinking your mind opens up so that you can effectively plan. Your creativity and awareness improve. Your ability to plan and know what to do improves. The information has usually been there all along but you can’t see it because your mindset wasn’t right.

You miss opportunity and knowing what to do because your attention was in the wrong place. With the correct mindset you are able to notice new opportunity and advantages too. Everything opens up and your resources become more available to you. The blinders drop off and you can see more clearly how to act more effectively. You can plan!

As you move forward your plans may change. They most likely will. Along your path to making your career and life dreams come true they may change a number of times but don’t give up! When traveling to a favorite vacation spot, if a road or bridge is out, you don’t abandon your decision to get where you want to go. You find an alternate route.

The More We Do The More We Can Do

You change your plans. Obstacles may come your way and you may go through a number of plans but you will find what works because you are open to it. You are adaptable and flexible. You are more resourceful as a result of having a winning persistent mindset. You are more competent and confident.

Your mindset, your thoughts, beliefs, attitudes are aligned and congruent. When this is the case you become a force to reckon with. If you know what you want in your career and in your life you take your powerful mindset and aim it at getting what you want. Then you can and will do the things that work and bring about what you. You become passionate and unstoppable! 

Most people put the cart before the horse. They try doing things hoping whatever they do next will be the right thing. They spend years spinning their wheels. Knowing what to do comes after knowing what and how to think. Actions follow right thinking. Get your thinking in order and your life and career will excel.” Rex Sikes

Make all you moments marvelous today!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so. If you benefit from these words please help someone else benefit too.

PSS  A great thing to do is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS  

*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Do Things Have To Get Bad For You Before They Get Good?

horizon orange flowers orange sky

“Are you one of these people? Do circumstances in life just go from bad to worse? There are some people who have to wait and let things get bad enough before they act. Is this you? They don’t move toward their goals. Instead they move away from discomfort. Things must get really bad before they get better. Many are like this.

This is known as the Pleasure/Pain Principle or The Carrot/Stick. Instead of moving toward the carrot, or the reward or pleasure they move away to avoid pain and punishment. When things are bad enough then they act. BUT not until they are BAD enough!

This is similar to the Last Straw Principle. They keep allowing pain and discomfort or bad events to pile up or circumstances and feelings to get so bad that they say, ‘Enough! That’s it! Never again!’ Finally, they act. You know the story. The camel’s owner kept piling straws on the camel’s back until it broke.

Many People Are Motivated By Pain And What They Don’t Want

In order for this person to be motivated it has to get really, really bad or bad enough. Some modern day guru’s have said, if this is you and you want to change, find a way to deliberately add on the pain until it gets so bad you do act in some way in your own best interests. I was never good at doing this deliberately.

If you are motivated by moving away from painful thoughts, events and circumstances this is how you are motivated. Until you learn to be motivated by focusing on what you do want and move toward it you will have to use what you have.

For example, some people decide they want to be rich and they move toward making money and having plenty. This is what they want and what they enjoy. They want to include money and having fine things in their life. They create positive circumstances to pursue.

Others don’t want to be poor. They hate being poor so they move away from poverty or lack.  They avoid it and want to exclude it as a possibility. They leave it behind.  If you are this latter person you may have experienced the struggle this type of motivation is.

You Need To Determine And Clarify What Your Do Want

You are driven by the need to not feel pain and to avoid what you don’t want. There is some benefit to this or in getting to the point of The Last Straw . Knowing what you do not want CAN help you clarify what you actually do want. If you spend time to decide precisely you can benefit immensely. Determine what you want!

Once you know exactly what you do not want then turn your attention to what you do want instead. Focus on what it is you want. Specify it. Make it real and desirable.  Turn your back on what you don’t want and put all of your attention and energy into creating and making what you want happen.

When you know what you want you are aiming at where you want to go. You have set your course and can move in A PURPOSEFUL direction. You can think intentional thoughts about it. You are able to close in on it step by step. The problem with the negative motivation is it is similar to running from a bear in an unknown woods.

You Must Focus On What You Do Want

While attempting to flee the bear you run anywhere you can. You attention is on not getting eaten. You run wherever you can. You may know you want safety but you don’t have time to plan. So you run to avoid the dire consequences. You don’t have a specific direction to go to. Any direction away from the bear is better.

It is important to realize that what you focus on you get. Call it  the Law Of Attraction or Karma, call it anything you like, the point is, whatever you put out you get more of it back. You plant one seed you get a lot more seeds back. Like attracts like. Birds of a feather flock together.

If you have to wait and wait until it gets bad enough for you to feel motivated to change you are focusing on what you don’t want. When you get enough of what you don’t want you then try to escape it. If this is you, the key to making it work is the moment you take action you must turn your attention to what you do want instead.

You Can Learn To Do Anything Persistence Is The Key

You have to shift your focus from what you do not want to what you do want. Keep you eyes and mind and thoughts on what you want. Then you are able to get what you focus on. What you think about you bring about. So you want to be thinking about what you DO want and not what you don’t want.

If while thinking about what you do you you notice yourself feeling less than glorious, not so good, or even bad then you have inadvertently slipped back into thinking about what you don’t want. The negative feelings are the signal to let you know you have gone off course. It is so wonderful we have feelings as an internal guidance system.

Feel good means you are focused on what you want. Feel bad means you are focused on what you don’t want. To have an enjoyable life you want more pleasure and far less pain. What you think about you bring about. So if you are thinking less than glorious thoughts you will be feeling less than glorious feelings. It is quite simple actually!

Both forms of motivation are possible. I find that it is more positive and powerful and feels better, once you know what you want,  to move toward what you want to have. I prefer to be drawn toward it magnetically than to be escaping from something I abhor. It is here, where what we focus on and how becomes meaningful.

Your Feelings Are A Great Guidance System

If you are focused mostly on what you don’t like and don’t want, if that is mostly what you see and experience then how do you get out of it. If all you notice is poverty and lack, if what you experience is not having what you want, you probably aren’t feeling very well or thinking very powerfully because you are focused on what sucks.

The good news is this: You learned to do that. Perhaps, at the time you didn’t realize you were learning it but that is what you did. It is a skill and it did serve a useful purpose at the time. AND we can learn to do many things. You made that a habit you can learn to make getting what you want easier and moving toward what you want a habit.

I have already told you how.  Countless times within all these blog pages. Go through it and read. The key is deliberately shifting you focus and keeping it there. It will be odd at first, a little uncomfortable or unfamiliar while you try a new thing but just as in learning any skill, stick with it, and you will master it. You will make it a new and useful beneficial habit. You can do this and when you do more good things are in store for you!” Rex Sikes

Savor the seconds, make marvelous the minutes, delight in the day!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so. If you benefit from these words please help someone else benefit too.

PSS  A great thing to do is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS  

*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Unleash The Magic Within You Right Now!

horizon tire tracks blue sky

“People want their life to change quickly. Do you? Are you one of these people who wants to have it now? Transformation can happen instantly? Often there is a breakthrough or ‘eureka’ moment when everything changes. This is very possible!

Then it takes time for everything else to adjust to the change. If you want six pack abs it will take some time to acquire. If you want to keep the six pack you know you will have to maintain them. If you get physically fit you still have to eat right and exercise right to stay fit. Still, there are moments when powerful things happen suddenly.

Just by reading this blog you could instantly change! Did you know that? You could transform in a single moment! You could enjoy great improvements in your life. You could delight more and have incredible happiness. You could skyrocket your career success. Its true!

Time Spent Reading Is A Wise Use Of Your Time

If you read my blog regularly you will learn and come to know what to do to get what you want. You will know what to do when you have difficulty and how to overcome it. It is rich with life transforming principles. That is one of the reasons I write the blog. I want to share what others have used, kept secret, or openly revealed that people still miss out on. When you learn amazing things will begin happening!

Just by reading! When you read and fill your mind with positive, inspirational material on a daily basis you can develop the necessary winning mindset to be, do and have anything you want in life. You can learn to live as a champion does and make your life marvelous.

So am I doing something to you? No. Is it what I write? Partly. What I share is wisdom from ancient times to modern times. Most of it is not mine I am just sharing what I have learned during my life. I am a messenger.

And one powerful message I want to deliver to you NOW is this: Read the blog. Read other inspirational material. Fill your mind. Read it and go back and re-read it regularly. You can and will transform. Go back through the blog site and read it again. Here is why.

You Make New Neural Connections And Pathways

Reading these words can instantly transform you but it is not because of the words. It is because of what you do with the words. It is because of your thoughts about the words. Everything in these blogs is about what you do! (Who is this YOU I write about? It is you and me. It is all of us. We are all in this together. What is good for the goose is also good for the gander). You must do something with it!

Information doesn’t transform us unless we apply it. If you know what to do but do not do it, you actually don’t know it. You can’t or you would be doing it. If you have the secret to life change and don’t use it you haven’t the secret. I am telling you right now here is an incredible secret if you put into action will make a phenomenal difference for you.

Transformation occurs due to your rumination. Your cognitions, and reflections. When you ponder over, think about, study and consider these concepts repeatedly your mind can begin to do astonishing things. Your mind will make connections within. Your contemplating and meditating over the concepts continually is like preparing the soil so seeds can sprout and grow.

What transforms you is not the words but your repeated study of the words and principles. The insights you gain is how change occurs. Your ‘ahas’ are what transforms you. Your instant illumination, that powerful moment when the concepts and principles gel and come together. That moment IS the result of you repeated filling your mind.

Apply Your Insights And You Evolve

Your personal ‘eureka’ instants are what changes you in amazing ways. These flashes and insights that you will have is when the magic happens. It is when everything suddenly comes together for you and you wake up to a new idea or a new way of being. You ‘get it’ finally!

This is precisely why it is important to fill your mind daily with positive, inspiring material. When you read it you can have an insight that changes everything! Wham! Everything comes together and you know what you need to do! That is a beautiful moment. You will still have to put things into motion and follow through but it all came together in an instant.

Your insights will lead you in positive and powerful directions. The conclusions you draw, change and draw again will change you in more beneficial ways than you can imagine. You will notice new things in your journey that previously remained hidden. You will wake up to new opportunities and advantages  as your mind assembles the principles and concepts with your experiences.

Correct Repetition Over Time Brings Success

So it it critical to get repeated exposure over time. When you go back and re-read the material a week or two later it can even seem entirely new material. You will be surprised by what you missed previously. Go back a month later. Keep re-reading.

The reason for this is because between the repeated readings you have thought about the principles, put them into action, gained experiences and evolved yourself. Write out your thoughts and conclusions. Then a while late, week or two, month or two re-write them out again. You will gain so much as you put into practice these simple practices.

By continuing to revisit the same concepts your mind has the opportunity to tie things together. If you only read something once and move on it similar to taking one bite of your dinner. You got a morsel. It is like pumping iron once. It doesn’t get the intended results. When you pump iron over and over muscles grow.

You Can Be Do And Have Anything You Want

So when you return to the same material you notice new things in it. Your mind puts it together in new ways. It is a fantastic evolutionary process. That means it is ongoing and improving. You can’t exposure you mind to positive messages enough. Each time you return to the same positive material you will get new things from it!

Those who are truly successful already do this.Those who have fabulous lives read regularly. It is really a secret that is hidden in the open, yet few take the time to do it. If you will you will discover a remarkable new world opening up to you. So please don’t miss out.

This material comes together in a new, meaningful and powerful ways for you. I write it to get it to you and to remind me. It is your cognition, your thought processes that are being stimulated by what you read. Focus on it, immerse yourself in it and real magic can happen. All the magic is within you.” Rex Sikes

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so. If you benefit from these words please help someone else benefit too.

PSS I have discussed how to make changes more easily using questions throughout these blog posts. You can search by topic and find some. A great thing to do is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Make today fantastic!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS     NEWS  

*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.