Category Archives: Affirmations

Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Confidence, Creating The Future, Definite Chief Purpose, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Goals, Intentional Thinking, Overcoming Difficulty, Patience, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Success

What You Do While Waiting To Succeed Is Critical!

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horizons pasture pathway

“Have you ever planted a garden? Have you ever tended to living, growing plants? As a child in school or as an adult did you help grow anything? Did you germinate seeds? Do you remember the process? Do you recall the time it took? You had to wait, didn’t you? Whether you liked it or not you had to wait.

People are in a hurry. They want everything fast and they want it yesterday. Well, some things just take time.  For everything there is as season. You just have to endure winter when it is upon you. It still takes the same amount of time whether you like it or not.

Patience Is How You Wait When You Have To Wait

How you go through it though makes the difference. Summer is shorter typically because we enjoy it more. Most of us. If we enjoy something time seems to go by quickly. Too quick. The key to being patient, when you have to, is HOW you spend your time.

If you are having fun and enjoying it will go by quickly. If you are counting the days and comparing the distance between now and then it will seem to take forever. Waiting is completely dependent on you and how you wait. If you are desperate it sucks. If you are fulfilled while you wait it is a breeze.

Growing up as an actor in Hollywood I discovered everyone wants to ‘break through’ to ‘hit it’ to become an ‘overnight sensation’ this moment. Especially teens and twenty somethings. At that age we want it all!  In the film business, most everyone comes to realize, an overnight success takes between 10 and 15 years.

You Cannot Rush It You Cannot Push A Rope

It is not just a saying. It is a reality. Few pop. Most take years and years. Exceptions are child stars. Look at anyone’s credits on imdb and you will see most started with uncredited roles or one liners and worked hard at it, for years, before you or I ever heard of them. They put in years worth of work before anyone noticed. During that time countless thousands of others gave up.

Those who keep at it usually have success of some kind. Those who quit, well, they quit. If you stop and give up, then you stopped. If you keep going you can prevail. Being patient doesn’t mean you don’t do anything while waiting it means you keep moving forward and keep the faith. What you think and do while you wait is critical!

You have to believe in yourself and what you want. You have to keep faith in your ability to accomplish what you set out to do.  You have to know in your heart that you will make it happen in spite of the odds and the time it takes. You have to know that you can do it and will do it!

Don’t Give Up If You Want To Succeed Keep At It

There will be obstacles, set backs and temporary defeat but if you keep at it you can accomplish it. You can and you will!

Did you know that most successful people nearly gave up just prior to gaining their success? Did you know that prior to ‘popping’ most experienced their biggest ‘failures’?  They were nearly crushed and threw in the towel. Those who did not went on to success.

Did you know the first million seems the toughest to make? Do you know Researchers like Napoleon Hill, going back over 100 years ago discovered this and it remains true today. It always seems darkest right before the dawn. Out of chaos and calamity stars are born!

Stay Focused Stay Purposed Stay Passionate And Have Fun

Any worthy purpose takes time to come into being. Be absolutely clear on what you want and you absolutely want it no matter what. If you believe in yourself that you can make it happen then you can find legitimate means to bring it to pass. Stay focused! Stay purposed! Stay Passionate!

When you plant seeds they germinate. The seed must crack open and send out shoots into prepared soil where it can grow in the cover of darkness for however long it takes. It takes time and we can’t see it. We have to believe all is well and make sure it gets nourished. Then one day it breaks forth from the ground a tiny plant.

With continued nourishment it can continue to grow. Depending on what you planted it could be a flower, a food, or a giant tree. It all takes times. It takes whatever time it takes. Ultimately, it produces more seeds and the cycle continues. All the while we wait patiently there is activity. Their is growth and development.

Keep The Faith You Will Succeed 

Patience is a quality you have. It is HOW you wait. It means expect to win while you wait. It means do whatever is necessary knowing your efforts will pay off even if you can’t see the results today. Stay steady and stay consistent. Step by step you get there. Persist!

It means you can’t hurry or rush it. Take steps each day and nourish your success. Stick with it and you will make progress. What you planted you will one day reap. Don’t abandon your positive garden! How you wait is important! Affirm, acknowledge, stay positive.

Focus on the end result. You can glance at present circumstances or difficulty as you do your dash board indicators, while driving, but keep you eyes on the road ahead and keep faith in your heart. You may need to adjust your plans or take detours occasionally but keep on going. Know your destination and keep traveling to get there. You will. Be patient” Rex Sikes

Have a triumphant day!

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Acceptance, Affirmations, Attitude, Celebration, Curiosity, Emotions, Focus, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Learning, Personal Development, Rehearsal And Practice, Self Improvement, Success

It Is Important To Know What You Are Good At!

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Phil koch green sky grass and creek

“Is there something you are good at? Do you have a particular talent? Can you can sing, dance, act or make people laugh? Maybe you are good with people? How about numbers? Do you have a flair for interior design, engineering or mathematics? Perhaps, you are good at writing screenplays, stories, articles or letters.

Maybe you are good in science or at managing money? You could be a wonderful conversationalist or storyteller. What is your talent? What is your passion? Do you like photography, cinematography or making music? Do you paint, sculpt, draw or scribble?

Maybe you like knitting. You could be great with cars. How about kids, you are good with kids! Are you an educator, a cook or a cop? What do you like to do? What are you good at? What is your strength? All of us have at least one thing we are good at. Most of us have a few and some of us many things we are accomplished in.

Become Aware Of Your Talents And Abilities

It can be your work, a hobby or simply something you excel at. It doesn’t matter whether you use it in a job or at play. It doesn’t matter how good you are compared to anyone else. These strengths are what YOU are good at. They are what you are strong in. These are areas you are talented in. Aspects you like and enjoy about yourself.

Recognize your strengths. Celebrate these. Embrace them. Be proud of your abilities. They can be mental skills, emotional skills or physical skills. You might be really good at thinking things through, asking questions and  finding solutions.

You could be a great listener, a true friend.  You might be good at understanding, loving or being compassionate. Perhaps, you are able to see the bright side in situations and encourage others or find humor.

Know Your Strengths

Maybe you are good at a sport or games. Do you like building or making things. Whether it is making clothes, decorations  or carpentry you are good with your hands. You might be musically inclined or play an instrument.

Whatever areas you excel at enjoy and do your best at. Don’t compare others to yourself. It isn’t necessary to be the best just do your best. The key is to accept, embrace and celebrate these aspects of you. After all, they are your resources. Your skills! Your Talents!

Your strengths are things you may have naturally demonstrated a proficiency in or that you learned to acquire. Some may have come more easily or you may have exerted great effort. The point is these are yours!

Embrace Your Strengths And Skills

Take an inventory of the many different areas you do well in. Think about who you are and what you able to do. Note which things you excel at and be grateful. Appreciate yourself. Feel it! Really FEEL IT!

Become aware that you have learned to do many things.  You have learned to be mobile. You  have learned to walk, feed oneself and dress yourself. You learned ride a bike, take public transportation or drive a car. You learned to communicate, speak, sign, read and write.

You have learned countless things which require complex thinking skills and physical abilities to co-ordinate. You learned these and so many others. Most everything you do you have learned by watching, by experimenting using trial, error and feedback, and by repeating over and over until you got good at it.

Celebrate Who You Are And What You Can Do

You may have done it mostly on your own with help or coaching. The point is you have learned so many incredible things. Do not take this for granted! Stop, think, reflect. Spend time adding these to things those you appreciate and are grateful for. Count your blessings.

We all have strengths and none of us are good at everything. People are good at different things. It makes the world more wonderful this way. Enjoy your talents and strong points. Think about this a lot. Affirm your good points. Do it daily. As you search for strengths notice ones you may not have ever previously considered.

Of course you can list your abilities on a resume or discuss them during an interview. Good to know what your strengths are then. Most importantly is you recognize what you are able to do and enjoy and what you have accomplished already.

You Have Learned So Many Wonderful Useful Things

Come to know your strengths and abilities! Realize you learned these and because you learned them you can learn anything if you want to. Keep growing and finding things that you enjoy, that you are excited about and feel passion for. Live, Learn, Love, Laugh!

You’ll find many things if you will only take the time to really look. Enjoy your discoveries. Keep learning too. Keep growing. Keep stretching and keep using your talents and abilities. Delight!” Rex Sikes

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

find the fun in this day!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

 

Affirmations, Beliefs, Celebration, Creator, Directed Questions™, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Intentional Thinking, Law Of Attraction, Personal Development, Positive Affirmations, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Success, Unlimited Power

Would You Like Your Joy To Know No Bounds?

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sometimes we need adversity to become successful

“Research has demonstrated many times over that our beliefs and attitudes determine what we see and find in the world. Our mindset determines the results we get. What we perceive to be our reality is our reality.

Scientific research into the brain, neuroscience, our neurology, our neurological filters, consciousness, ‘the maps’ we live from verify that what we think creates our reality. Whether we enjoy the results we get or not is determined by what we think about.

Most people just don’t get this. I always maintain that the delusion IS the great illusion, or said differently, the illusion IS the delusion. Some people tend to believe that there is an outer world we must contend with. They think we don’t have choice. They insist there is only hard core reality.

Perception Is Everything

They are the type who don’t put stock in positive thinking because it didn’t work, or they haven’t actually tried it but dismiss it anyway, because they believe differently.

Because they don’t believe it works the way I have described it must work the way they believe it does. Do you get this? Either way we are discussing mindset and its effects.

Then there are those who believe that the outer reality is a reflection of our inner reality. How we perceive the world is how we experience it. Perception is everything and it frames our experience. We often find what we expect to find. Whether they believe, or even know about the science, they tend to align with the scientific thinking.

Quantum Physics describes the world in terms of participation. There is an observer who influences the process while being influenced by the process. It is one and the same with many facets that appear separate. Our universe may be holographic. It is described as a matrix or a a field with everything connected or part of each other. In the hologram the whole is contained in each piece perfectly.

If you make a holographic image on the film plate. Then shatter the plate. The entire image is contained in each and every piece without losing any of its original properties. Everything, all the information is there in each single piece. For example, if the hologram were made of the Mona Lisa every fragment would still contain the entire image of the Mona Lisa. Some researchers believe this helps explain our experience in our ‘field’ or matrix.

The Entire Whole Is Contained Within The Part

For some people the concepts are difficult to wrap their head around. Particularly, if they adhere to hard core outer reality. I find ancient philosophers and some scientists have much in common. The world, our experience of it, is a rich, varied mystery. Here is my bottom line.

I choose to believe the world is friendly. If I have choice and I can look for smiles or frowns I am going to look for smiles. If I have to find the good or the bad, well then, I am going to look for the good.

I know that if I look for smiles I will find them. I may also find a frown as well but I won’t let that bother me. Both exist and both are noticeable. If I have a say in the matter then I will chose what I think best for me. I chose to be happy, look for the good and enjoy it all.

Positive thinking doesn’t mean ignoring problems it means looking for solutions. It means finding the potential in each situation whether good or not so good. It means look at the possibilities and aim for the best outcome. I think it is very realistic and it accomplishes lots.

The World Conforms To What I Think And Say It Is

Some would say that is unrealistic and optimism is not always a good thing. I say, if I have choice I am going to choose. If I can be happy why would I ever choose to be unhappy? Some will have reasons for why they might choose unhappiness. That is their choice.

That is what they believe. I believe what we believe determines what we get. So it explains a lot. I have accomplished more in less time as a positive thinker taking responsibility for what I create and do than I ever have as a negative thinker. Positivity and Intentional Thinking leads to more productive actions.

I am 100% responsible for myself. I am 100% responsible for my thoughts, my behaviors and my circumstances. This is how I choose to live. Things from the outside may have an influence but it is up to me how I choose to respond.

I can control my thoughts therefore my feelings and behaviors. I determine my mindset. I shape my attitude and expectations. I fill my mind with the best so that my mind gives me the best. I focus on the best feelings.

What I Look For I Find

I choose to experience and savor feelings of gratitude, love, joy, peace , happiness. curiosity, wonder and amazement. I enjoy feeling eager anticipation and exhilaration. I like making things happen and discovering how things come together in surprising ways.

Birds of a feather flock together. Our brains work by association and when it finds one example it can find numerous. I want it to find more wonderful things and fewer less than glorious things so I focus on what is good and new.

I know we attract back and create more of what we put out there. We become what we think about. So I am very picky what I think about. I wasn’t always but I have learned to be and it has paid off big.

It isn’t always easy but it is within my control. It is the one thing I am able to control. I can’t and don’t control yours. I don’t make the world spin but I can have control of my thinking process.  I can choose to watch it or I can choose to manipulate it.

I Control My Thoughts And My Experience

It is similar to driving in my car. I choose where I want to go and I am responsible for getting there safely. Things arise that require my attention and I may have to adjust to remain safe and remain traveling to where I want but that I can do.

Some times it is very easy. Other times it requires more effort but that is just how it is. I don’t complain or whine about it. I don’t blame myself or anyone else. When I realize I am making it tougher than it need be I adjust what I am doing and move on.

It wasn’t always like this. For much of my early life, though I started researching this around age 10, I didn’t understand it really. I immersed myself deeply but still I would describe it as dabbling. I tried things but felt I wasn’t in control. I couldn’t. Maybe others could get it to work but not me.

Year after year I sought to learn, to grow, to change, to master and yet it seemed to elude me. I went on to teach this stuff by my mid 20’s and had some success. Then one year I had a banner bad year. It looked like I might lose everything. I was consumed with thoughts of why this was happening to me. I was unlucky.

Change The Bad To The Better

I couldn’t believe  how one bad thing after the other happened. At one point I woke up. I realized I have to change something because it wasn’t getting any better on its own. I had to do something! I concluded it my thinking and my attitude that was at the heart of my difficulties. My mindset was the cause of these events.

Whether that is accurate or not it gave me something to work with. I vowed to get back to my roots, to my learning, from my youth onward, and to master it. I made the decision to change my thinking and to start making good things happen instead of the bad. I was going to start getting what I wanted and put an end to getting what I didn’t want.

At the same time I didn’t want to get carried away, I wasn’t interested in ringing bells, lighting candles, hugging trees or any mystical stuff! I wanted realistic, practical, life changing power without becoming a true believer or one who mediates all day but nothing changes.

I started reading again daily. I vowed to read a chapter a day from Napoleon Hill. Wallace Wattles and other inspirational authors for at least 30 days. I would fill my mind with inspirational material. This turned out to be the wisest and the very best decision I have ever made (along with choosing to have children).

Something You Can Do That Will Make A Real Difference

I began as soon as I got up in the morning. I would read. Then during the day I would again attempt to put into practice what I learned and what these authors suggested. When I could I read some more during the day or prior to bed.

This simple commitment changed my life. One month later I was on my way to being a different person. It was uphill for certain but it made the climb easier bit by bit. My attitude was improved and I felt better. I knew I could make my life better. I knew it was up to me!

The journey became more enjoyable even as it was arduous at times. I began listening to audios too. I went back into asking myself Directed  Questions™ and using affirmations correctly full time.

Day by day, minute by minute my life improved. There were times when it seemed like a long haul. There were times when shit hit the fan. There were times when I began to lose hope but I didn’t. I found a way out. I stumbled and fell but pulled myself back up again and again.

I made it a point to go back into celebration and appreciate the tough times as well as the good. Yes, I nearly gave up sometimes but being grateful for whatever I was experiencing saw me through.

Attitude And Gratitude Create Momentum

I have mentioned in previous blog posts momentum and how it can work for you or against you. I have experienced a lot of negative momentum in my life. For years now the positive momentum increases. It is such a wild joyful rife. I can literally feel it. It is so amazing!

Years later life is grand. I am pleased. I went through a rough patch for while some years ago. I got caught up for a bit, but then returned to what made a difference for me in my life. It is all good and all part of being human. I have learned to accept what is while making changes too. Sounds like a paradox but it isn’t.

I am happy. Whether the outer improves or not and it is always improving (even when it appears as if it may not be) I am very grateful and very blessed. Each moment is a moment of enjoyment and wonder. I get hooked or caught up so less frequently and if I do I account for it.

Anyone Can Do It And Succeed

I am no smarter or any more special than any one else. I have screwed up a lot in my life. I have known joys and suffering. I am just a common man on the planet BUT if I can chose to turn my life around so can anyone else. If I can do it so can you!

Anyone can change given they have reason to. If you want to you can. You can make your life wonderful. You may do it faster or slower than I did. Who cares the time it takes? What is important is to make a decision and make a commitment to and for yourself. Decide to make your life better and stick with it. Commit to it. Persist.

I have learned a better way to live. I have experienced and continue to experience a glorious way to live. I feel so blessed. BUT I didn’t always. It wasn’t until I took 100% responsibility for my life and my attitude that things transformed.

It wasn’t until I decided that I created all of my experience! When I became responsible for what I create I became free to create good things. It is the most incredible thing!

It is as if joy comes in from every direction. Yes, there are times that are more difficult but so what. There are far more times when bliss abounds. If you want a similar or even better experience than mine you can have it. I am not special in anyway. Do it today!” Rex Sikes

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HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Savor this day!

Enjoy what is glorious about you today!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others

Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Creating The Future, Curiosity, Decision, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Intentional Thinking, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Improvement

The Secret To Making The Changes You Need To

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there is nothing impossible

“Are you aware that making personal change is quite simple and easy? It really is.  It just doesn’t seem that way and that is because you don’t think or believe it is. It really is! It is true!

Most people don’t have to be unhappy, lonely, unsuccessful, broke, in poorer health, they just think they do. They don’t. You don’t! There is a way that you can be, do and have everything you want

Change can be quite easy. People can change.You can be whatever you want to be, do and have whatever you want in life. You can make it happen more easily than you may have ever imagined. You can end bad unwanted habits and create new better ones..

The caveat is this:

It Isn’t Seeing Is Believing It’s Believing Is Seeing

HOW we think about something makes it true for us. Our beliefs actually make it so. The results we get or don’t get are directly related to what we think and believe inside our head first.

I know plenty of people will object to this concept. It will get some people hot as they argue for objective reality imposing on us. These arguments or discussions have been around for a long time.

From, ‘I think therefore I am’, to ‘If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound?’ People will find excuses to defend what they already believe rather than trying on new beliefs that serve them better.

There is enough research that anyone can find. I am not going to debate it here.That is not a fruitful use of mine or your time. I ask you to consider this. What if everything you knew were wrong? What would life be life? It surely would be different, how?

I ask this because it isn’t about making assertions it is about becoming open. It is about becoming curious and being able to entertain concepts rather than dismiss them because we disagree with them. There is the Zen story about the master who sent the seeker away because his tea cup was already full.

You Cannot Pour More Tea Into A Full Cup

You must first empty the cup, the master pointed out, then new tea can be poured in. We all have full, completely filled, heads. We have all the assumptions, reasons, excuses, why we are who we are and do and have what we do and have.

We need to let these go. We need to suspend our beliefs, at least momentarily, to even be able to entertain new ideas or new beliefs. We need to be open, empty and available to a new way of thinking and being in order to even attempt it. When the student is ready the teacher appears. Then new tea can be given. Then, life can change!

It is asking better questions that lead us to more useful outcomes. It is not declaring something wrong before trying it out. Curiosity and the willingness to explore opens us up to the possibility of adventure. Dismissal out of hand, too quick, simply shuts everything down. Either we expand, contract or remain the same.

The Flower Is Either Growing Or It Is Dying

Can you be open? It is easy to be open. It just doesn’t seem that way.

Whatever you declare makes it so. You are doing it right now as you read. You either agree or you don’t. You may be one of those who suspend judgement until more data becomes available but more probably you are either agreeing or disagreeing with each statement How open and available are you to entertain new ideas?

We can be, do and have anything in life if we want it. Would you agree? If yes, why? If not, why not? Your answers reveal your beliefs. Either you believe you can or you believe you can’t. You will have reasons why you believe either way. These beliefs and reasons determine the results you get or don’t get.

You Can Be, Do And Have Anything You Want

We can be, do and have anything in life if we want it. Yet, most people don’t come close. A few do. It seems they have unlocked the secret while the rest have not. Others believe god (or the universe) selects certain people to bless and others to fail. OR they believe some are just incredibly lucky while most are not.

People have been taught the secret for eons.  Some people figure it out by accident, which is certainly possible. However, they come to it they come to it. Once exposed to it they either apply it or not. Those who do know what happens as a result. Those who don’t never know.

Either You Believe It Is Possible For You Or You Don’t

Let me provide an example. Let’s take a plank the width of a door, in fact lets take a solid wood plank 2x the width of a door. That is probably about the width of a normal sidewalk. It’s length is 100 feet long. It is as solid as anything can be solid. 100 feet long and about 5 or 6 feet wide and strong.

I put this plank down on the ground and ask you to walk. Do you think you could? Probably, it is the same as walking on the sidewalk. Most people could do so without any thought or effort.You could walk, might even run, skip or hop your way along the board for the 100 feet. No big deal, right?

Ok so I raise it 20 feet in the air. Would you walk it?  Some would some would not. Raise this same plank 100 feet in the air would you walk it?  Fewer would walk it. If we could raise it a half a mile would you walk it? Few ever say yes. I’ve had a difficult time finding anyone to say yes, ‘I’ll gladly walk it’.  Would you?

Why, do most people opt out when it gets raised from the ground? The plank has not changed. It is the same plank people traversed easily while on the ground.  What changed is people’s thoughts about it.

They are fearful of the height. They imagine themselves falling. The higher up the fewer people willing to walk it because they get frightened. They imagine bad things in their mind. BUT Nothing has actually changed.

Our Beliefs Determine What We Will And Won’t Do

Our beliefs determine what we will and won’t even consider. You realize this right? Absolutely, nothing changed. The plank high in the air is exactly the same one easily walked on the ground. What changed was inside one’s head.

Their beliefs changed. What they imagined happening changed. How they felt as a result changed. They couldn’t imagine walking it because of what they were thinking. This meant they wouldn’t even try. If you don’t attempt it you don’t get any results at all.

It isn’t much different than being afraid of a spider. The spider is millions of times smaller than the human but some humans freeze with fear. It is what the human thinks, sees, tells oneself inside one’s head that makes the tiny spider scary.

Our Beliefs Determine What Is Easy And What Is Not

Our beliefs determine what we do AND do not do. Our beliefs determine what is and isn’t possible for us; what is difficult or easy; what takes time or no time. Whether we move forward and change easily or not has to do with our beliefs.

Does that mean if I believe I can jump over the moon I will be able to? No, it doesn’t. I honestly, don’t know if you could or not but I suspect the answer is no. I am not suggesting ‘impossible’ things. But some people think they can no more succeed than they could jump over the moon. That is sad. That is not comparing apples to apples.

Can you make a million dollars by tomorrow? Well, you could. You might. It may be rarer to do that but it could happen. Some people play the lottery and get lucky and become rich with the drop of 6 balls. So it is possible but not likely.

It isn’t about magic. It is not that you wave a wand and things happen because you believe.  It is the practical application of your positive mindset and expectations that determine how successfully you move in the world.

Could you make a million dollars?  Yes.  You certainly can if you believe you can and go after it?  Can you be happy after living a lifetime of sadness. Yes. Can change can be easier than you think it is? Yes!  Sadly, most people think it is tough and never both to change what they believe.

Your Beliefs Work For You – You Shouldn’t Be Their Servant

Why have you come to have these beliefs? Who cares? We could discuss that forever. The question is will you begin to expand your beliefs and abilities so you can live happily and be who you want to be, feel what you want to feel, do what you want to do and get what you want to have.

Don’t let your thoughts prevent you. Have the courage to challenge your thoughts. Make your mental constructs, your images and self talk your servant.  Make these work for you instead of being their servant. You can triumph and be a champion or you can be a victim or remain stuck.

Getting to where you want to get in life is just like getting anywhere in life. You have to know where you want to go, believe you can get there and then get moving. If anything comes along to interrupt or make the travel difficult, adjust your map, but keep going. Obstacles may arise. Keep going! In real life obstacles represent opportunity.

The Poor And The Powerless Fear Failure And Hardship.

Some people won’t even try because they don’t want to fail. That may be safe and assures you that nothing changes. If you don’t try you won’t fail but you also are not likely to ever succeed.

The successful and rich people don’t fear failure. They don’t even consider it an option. They know they will succeed. They know that they will learn more from attempts that don’t work out than from immediate success. They know they will succeed even when they don’t know how.

The successful understand that knowing how isn’t what you need to begin. How will become clear along the journey. They understand that they only need to determine to win and go after it and they will figure it out along the way AND make their dreams come true. They don’t let anything stop them.

They know that challenges equip them with more of what they need to triumph. Their attitude, their beliefs are different. Their mindset supports them. They are in charge. They don’t let the thought of defeat or actual defeat prevent them from making good in the end.

The Successful Know In Advance They Will Succeed

Failure nearly always precedes success. If you interview most of the self made millionaires and influential people you’ll discovered nearly all of them overcame incredible odds. For most, it was anything but easy. Yet, they prevailed. They did because of their mindset.

The people who succeed know they must continue. They are driven. They are passionate about making a difference. They believe they ultimately succeed no matter what. So they do! Attitude separates the wheat from the chaff.

Mindset determines how far you will be willing to go. ‘If you think you can or you think you can’t you are right.’ said Henry Ford. He was right.

Are you willing to suspend your doubt, your suspicion, your fear, your worries, your know it all attitude, or your ‘I don’t know enough’ attitude to allow yourself to try on some new beliefs. Can you begin to believe you can make it happen and that you can change easily?

I know there will be those who can change their beliefs as they would a spring jacket. They will move forward changing and surprising themselves and delighting along the way. They will encounter difficulty but they won’t let it stop them.

I also know there are those who will cling to what they have always believed and always known. Those will dismiss this proposal out of hand as silly or too hard or  impossible. These people will remain the same.

Decide To Be The Victor, The Champion, The Winner

Change is easier than you think it is OR it is as tough as you think it is. (I’ll continue to address this in other upcoming blogs.)

It is whatever you believe it to be. Your thoughts either move you forward toward what you want OR they stop you and hold you back. You are either the controller, the victor of your thoughts or you are the victim of your thoughts.

At any moment you can chose to be a champion if you will let yourself. Take responsibility and recognize you have a choice. You have a decision to make. Which type of person are you? Which type of person do you want to be? Which type of person will you be? It is completely up to you! Decide today!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy today. Make it exciting!

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Do You Ever Get Hooked Bad? How To Get Unhooked!

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Take-a-deep-breath copy

“What do you do when you get caught up? Something happens and it bursts your positive bubble. Your momentum is thrown off, the apple cart upset. How do you react? How should you? How could you? Is there a better way to behave when when s–t hits the fan?

First,  to ‘get caught up’ is an apt description. We get caught, hooked just like a fish. We think things are great and the next thing you know we swallowed a big hook. That sucks! What do we do?

We do whatever it is we do. Nature takes its course. We may get angry even while knowing it would be best not to. We may do things against our better judgement and against our own best interests. It happens. Sometimes we react without thinking and sometimes we react while thinking we ought to be doing something else.

We are hot and bothered but not in the good way. We are hurting, angry, scared, lashing out. We are desperate and convinced the world is ending or at least turing bad on this very point. We are absolutely hooked and we are reacting automatically. Again, we are caught up in it.

Whatever it is triggered a response from us. An unwanted, painful uncomfortable response. Maybe we yelled at ourselves. Perhaps, we shouted at a loved one or co-worker. We created pain for others too. Why not? Maybe they hurt us first? Right? Wrong!

Nothing justifies a poor, bad or negative reaction. There is no excuse for yelling at ourself or others. However, if that is what happen that is what happened. I will come back to this in a moment. The first thing is to acknowledge, whenever you become aware, is that you reacted as you did. Accept responsibility and realize you did as you did.

The truth is you went haywire. You lost control. You fought or fought back. Whatever it is accept it. There are consequences to our actions. For every cause there is an equal and opposite effect. You may have started other wheels spinning or like dominos you just knocked over the very first one.

Ok, that is what was, and what might be. First, accept responsibility without blaming yourself for your reaction. YOU reacted. YOU lost control. Sad to say so but that is what happened. Accept it without shaming yourself. That won’t help you end that issue.

Accept you behaved poorly, acknowledge it, and turn your attention to how you could have behaved or responded better or more appropriately. What could you have done differently, even though you didn’t?

Figure out what the most positive response is that could benefit everyone in a positive and productive way. How might you have behaved that could have kept things in check (possibly) instead of them rampaging out of control?

In order to behave better in the future you have to know what behavior you want instead. YOU just got slammed right in the face big time with the behavior you don’t want. Consider it a godsend. Pretend someone somewhere, the universe is sending you an incredible message and opportunity.

Your hot, negative, unwanted thoughts, feeling and behaviors are all exactly what you don’t want. Hopefully, the messenger gets through because the messenger tells you, ‘okay that happened, own up to it, make restitution, and NOW focus on what you DO want instead.’

You reacted instead of responded. You reacted to whatever the circumstances dictated and you fell victim to it. Hey, we all do it so blame is not the name of this game. Get over yourself. Determine your positive course, the positive thoughts, feelings, behaviors and results you want in your future instead.

The first key in getting unhooked is to notice that YOU got hooked. Then, once you notice it, you do what you need to to get unhooked. In the human’s case we need to focus on what we want and where we want to end up instead. We want more productive responses next time.

There are many ways to do this I will discuss in future blogs. We can use our imagination, our internal movie theater, self-talk, affirmations, Directed Questions™ and more for just this sort of thing.

My point is this: We evolve ourselves. In evolution somethings take time. Some things take repeated examples or exposures. Some lessons it seems we have to learn again and again until we eventually get it. AND THAT IS OKAY! That is just the way it is.

We may want it to be different. We may wish it were like all the promises the media makes for instant relief and magic gadgets but life is more like a flowering garden. Beautiful things just take some time to appear. We grow, adapt, and evolve.

So again no blame, no shame. The best thing you can do is acknowledge your reaction and pat yourself on the back and hope you will notice the next ones too. Praise yourself not for your reaction but for you becoming aware that you reacted and were focused on what you did not want. This provides you a choice point and the opportunity to change.

This increases the likelihood  that you will become aware and notice quicker in future episodes because you aren’t punishing yourself. No one likes that. Well, at least fewer people do. Awareness is the doorway that opens for you to find new opportunity. Validate your awareness and it willingly works to benefit you.

Determine to respond better in the future. Again, I’ll share more later but if you read my blog regularly there are lots of tips and secrets and practices and principles you can apply right now to begin doing that.

Own your reaction. Take responsibility. Make an apology genuinely and promise to never do that again. Do whatever must be done to correct any wrong doing or harm. Help provide healing. Sometimes that means walking away too and leaving the other person alone if they request that. Be respectful!

That last point is an important one for behavior in the world. Walk away.

‘When we ‘react’ it causes pain because it is a ‘knee jerk’. It means we have no choice. We actually do have choice but it happens so fast or things start snowballing out of control that it seems as if we don’t and we can’t help it.

We always have choice and the choice point is right smack in the beginning. Something happens outside of us or within us to set it off. Things start happening. There is actually a sequence. It may seem one moment we are fine and the next we flew of the handle but there is an actual sequence of events that happen in real time.

Neurons fire. Neural pathways are activated. Signals are sent Hormones and chemicals are released. Our body is preparing for FIGHT OR FLIGHT!

In jungle days with real world predators we needed this to run very fast or fight very strong to survive. We need it much more rarely in our modern world and we don’t need it when most arguments ensue.

BUT IT IS THERE anyway. To serve us. Because we think we are being threatened when in fact we are, but not in that life-threatening way. We need to learn to better respond and adapt to our circumstances than be walking around as jungle cave people in the 21st century. Don’t you think?

Because there is a sequence it takes time. YES, it happens very fast. REALLY  really fast. BUT you can still catch it. THAT is precisely why we want to encourage our awarenesses. We want to become aware as it is happening that there is something WE CAN DO instead.

We can actually divert the behavior into new more productive behaviors and new neural pathways.

We just have to catch the moment first. AT the very instant of the trigger, we are caught unawares, and then the body takes over and begins to release chemicals. As these chemicals and the neurons begin traveling their routes we feel the changes.

Maybe we get ‘hot under the collar’ or ‘red in the face’ maybe we ‘see red’ or feel tension increase. Anything, any way you describe it, is possible.

The point is to become aware as this happens. As the chemicals release its called Emotional Flooding. We get flooded with feelings and sensations. IF we notice them, again the reason awareness is important, we can change them right then. We have this choice brief choice point to give us time or room to respond differently.

Imagine for a moment you are at the top of a hill with a huge boulder. You are in front of it. It begins to roll down hill. ALL you have to do is put your arm out and you can stop it from rolling. You really can. The reason you can stop it is that it just began. You caught it right in the beginning.

It didn’t have time to build momentum. Had you been four or five feet away, or ten or more you would not be able to stop it at all. You would have to jump aside. It has too much momentum by then. It is the same with our emotions flooding us. If we catch them right at the beginning we can be different. IT can be different.

This flooding seems fast and is because the neural pathways have been traveled countless times before. They are well worn and utilized. In order to change we have to provide new pathways. It will take awhile for them to get well worn in too. Still, we do have choice.

Awareness is the first step. The second is to decide to choose what else to do instead. One of the best things to make habit is to take a very deep breath. Breath. Breath again. Breathing helps to change what is happening in the body. So does pacing or walking as long as you don’t use the walking to build momentum.

Take a deep breath. Change your body posture. Move, walk, don’t remain in the same place. Keep breathing slowly. EMT’s are known to have a person walk off the adrenaline when in an accident or a near miss.

When the flooding happens people get jittery as the chemical floods into the system. You can’t get rid of it, you can’t just dump it. but you can use it in a managed activity. Walking. You could skip or dance but on the street they also are concerned with safety. So move calmly and breath to better utilize what the body is giving you.

Take a breath. Create that pause in the flood. Use your own body to stop the momentum and you prevent the emotional boulder from shooting down the hill. You can stop the flooding. It can be done. You divert it into a more productive and less destructive path.

Choice is important. When you make a decision you can change your thoughts and feelings to respond in a more beneficial manner for yourself and others. You can choose to walk away from the fight.

It may not seem like it now but you really can. You can choose to do nothing at all. It does not, necessarily, require that anything be done just because you got hot.

When you create the pause, the gap, that room, you can begin to see that this is true. You don’t have to continue on you can respond differently!

The only way to decide differently is to create that space by making the pause happen. You create the pause, which slows the flood, you positively manage the resulting emotions converting them into other relaxed responses. You get your head clear.

You are creating new neural pathways. You are changing the old route to a new one. The result is the same as when you moved to a new residence. You have a different address. You end up in a different place.

You pause, (breath and move and continue to) you relax, let go, and continue as needed. You direct your mind to more useful places, thoughts and behaviors (Directed Questions™ were created for this).

YOU chose a new more productive, positive, useful response. It could be anything. As long as it isn’t the old one and it is positive and constructive you are doing yourself a great service.

You have just stopped the emotional flooding, got unhooked and created a new neural pathway to travel to a new address. Fantastic! Celebrate and be grateful!

Appreciate that you have taken control instead of being a victim of your own chemistry and emotions. You determined you were going to re-route them. Pat yourself on the back!

Just as when you actually move from one address to a new address you may, from time to time, discover yourself taking the old way to the old home. This can happen with behaviors too. In time, by taking the new route to the new place enough times you make it a well worn pathway.

You have lost nothing. You can still always find your way to the former residence, if you were to choose to. You haven’t lost anything, you aren’t deprived of anything. What changed is you have a new, more useful productive, constructive pathway to a beautiful new residence.

Travel there happily. You find you don’t even think about the old route but you could if you wanted to. How cool is all of this? Pretty wonderful, if you ask me. You always have choices available.

In the next blog I will share with you  a ways to wire this in. The one after that I’ll discuss developing a new mindset to give yourself new choices. Meanwhile celebrate and enjoy!” Rex Sikes

Find delight in your day and night!

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How To Stop Brain From F’ing You Up

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you can become anyone you want to be

“Who do you imagine yourself to be? What do you say about who you are? What do you think and say and imagine about what you have done, can do, and will accomplish? What you think about you bring about! What are you thinking and saying about yourself to yourself and others throughout each day of your life? Whatever it is you can bet you are fulfilling it.

If you want to make permanent, positive changes, easily, then you need to work with the system. What you have been affirming all your life may be the reason you have been stuck. Those limiting ‘I’ statements we say to ourselves and others keep us the same. What you hold in your head you will hold in your hand!

Thanks for joining me for Part 2. Continued From Previous Post: If Your Computer Is Sabotaging You; Fix It!

See Yourself As You Wish To Be ‘As If’ You Already Are

Maltz suggested we spend time each day visualizing ourselves as we wish to be. He had specific recommendations that included imaging our goals as already complete. See ourselves as we would be if we right now had those changes. We should visualize ourselves as having already made the changes we want to make. We should see the end result.

Imagine your life and actions in as much detail as possible, as it would be, if you were precisely the way you hope you will be. Imagine it ‘as if’ the change has already been made and you are living as you hope to. Inside your head, live, think and act as if that future you is right now.

I have shared with you previous blogs why this works. The brain can’t tell the difference between an imagined image and a real one on the outside. I have shared with you the research. It would be well worth it to go back through my blogs and re-read as many as you can. Study these principles and practices daily and you will make your dreams come true!

Spend time imagining what you want each day, morning and night. Imagine it as already accomplished and enjoy the feelings that accompany this. These wonderful, powerful feelings combined with the new imagery informs the unconscious, our subconscious servo mechanism (servant mind,) that THIS is what we want.

Maltz, leaders of the New Thought Movement, ancient philosophers and practitioners also prescribed this. While this may be new to you or some people today, it has been around working forever. The sad truth is that few apply it. I hope you won’t be one to pass up having everything you want in life for the reasons we are discussing here.

Earl NIghtengale referred to it as ‘the strangest secret’ because as he pointed out, it is not secret at all. These working principles are well known but few ever apply them. That secret is: you become what you think about most during your day and night. The secret is hidden in plain view.

Strong, Intense Emotions Run The Show

Visualization, combined with intense positive emotion, repeated again and again brings about the change. You must be consistent and persistent and not waiver or give up. We bring about what we think about. The more passionate, the greater the desire, the more intense the feelings the stronger the message signal.

I have shared how our less than glorious emotions run the show because of their intensity. When we are angry, raging, fearful or sad, when we worry and doubt these bring us more of the same because what we focus on we get back.

Powerful emotions drive the subconscious. Powerful emotions combined with what we focus on, whether we focus intentionally on what we want, or unintentionally on what we don’t want, cause us to get back more of the same. The signal value is high. This is the language the subconscious understand and replicates. The language IS powerful emotions combined with images in our head.

The subconscious only knows to give you more of the same. Whatever you are feeding it the subconscious gives back. Positive or negative. Wanted or unwanted.The key to getting what you want is intention. You intend to get positive results BY focusing on what you want and enhancing your positive thoughts and feelings! The more you feel good as you think about yourself now and in the future the more that is the present and future you get back.

Imagine how you want to be, feel, do and what you want to have as if it has already come true. This is important because if you imagine it in the future, out there, it will stay in the future. Someday never comes. Our subconscious works to make it happen as we imagine it. FEEL IT FULLY! Embrace the positive feelings.

Since we can’t imagine every detail, I like to include a disclaimer that I think and repeat. ‘this or something better’ because I am completely into being happily surprised. By repeating it over and over in your inner movie theater combined with strong positive ‘feel good’ feelings you deliver the message to the subconscious which ultimately receives the signal, the message and acts on it.

Change Your Self Image And You Can Change Your Habits

In this manner you develop the habits and behaviors in alignment with your new self image. The results of intentional visualization combined with strong intense positive feelings repeated over and over is the message, you want, gets through through to the subconscious and we then begin to think, feel and behave consistent with our new self imagine.

As you begin to change the inner image you speak to yourself more positively. Your self-talk becomes nicer and more inspiring. You begin to think in terms of yourself as an ‘I can learn to do anything’ type of person.

You become a ‘can do’ person. You learn you can change anything inside you AND when you change the inner you – you realize you can change anything outside yourself as well. Use your self-talk wisely. Speak only to bless, heal and prosper. Stop blaming and criticizing and making excuses for yourself.

You’ll see new advantages and opportunities you may have missed before. You become alert to them because now you see in new ways. The inside changes first. You make new connections and form new neural pathways. You are evolving your brain and yourself.

Your self image determines what you become. The outer matches the inner.  If your inner world is impoverished your outer world will be too. If your inner world sucks the results you get will suck as well. It takes a wake up call to change.

Sometimes, you just get sick and tired of being sick and tired. Sometimes, it is a large upheaval in a person’s life that causes the individual to snap into ‘I have to change’ mode. Sometimes, it is just a review of what your life has been or is like.

As Above So Below; As Within So Without

If your outer circumstances suck change your inner world! Change what you have been doing and you will begin to notice things in your life changing. Begin from within. Change your inner vision and you will change your world as you see yourself.

As you become a new person within the outer world conforms to your self image of yourself. You fix the outer world by first fixing the inner world.

Self Image and habits go together. Change your Self Image and your behaviors change to be consistent with the new you. As you repeat the new behaviors they become new positive habits. As you develop the new positive habits you become more confident and competent and this reinforces the new positive Self Image. You really do evolve yourself!

If you don’t see yourself happy, wealthy or successful you won’t ever develop those behaviors as long as you don’t see it. However, as you being to see yourself as happy, wealthy and successful and you feel it within and you believe it; and you move through the world with these thoughts and feelings you begin to behave in happier, healthier, wealthier and more successful ways.

You bring about the outer change by having changed the inner. Maltz, Hill, Wattles, and so many others before them, and since them encourage you to make yourself and your life what you want it to be. No one can do it for you. You may have adopted the image of yourself and the beliefs you grew up with from others but you don’t have to keep any you don’t want. Those have brought you to today!

Today, the decision is yours. Only you can improve your own Self Image. Only you can make your mind, your thoughts and your imagination work for you. End the limitations, learn to be free. Enjoy a new day and a new life when you decided to take charge. Update the computer and get it working for you automatically instead of against you!” Rex Sikes

Thrill yourself with all good things!

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Do This One Tiny Change And You Can Move Mountains!

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take the first step in faith MLK

“Some people think in order to make positive, permanent, pervasive, change that they must change everything at once in order to get anything at all. That is just not true. What is true is you must change something but you don’t need an entire make over.

You have heard me say, or you have read in my writings a favorite quote, ‘drop by drop fills the tub’. Or I ask, how do you eat and elephant? Answer,  ‘Bite by bite’. You know the famous quote, ‘A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step’.

Small changes can be powerful. When NASA shoots a rocket to the moon its internal guidance correction system is making micro corrections all the while to keep it on course. That’s because if the rocket blasts off and is 1/10 of 1% off course near the time of lift off within a short while it will be hundreds of thousands, even millions of miles off course.

If you were driving straight in the salt flats and you turned your wheel just a tiny bit and locked it in right there soon you would be miles and miles away from the straight line you were traveling in. That small adjustment takes you way off in another direction.

So it is true if you are aiming at a target destination and you get off course by only the tiniest little bit you will be off course by a lot very soon.

The other truth is if you want to change your life it only takes a little bit of change to make a serious amount of large change. That tiny correction you make will take you very far in improving your life.

You exclaim, ‘I don’t have the time, the energy or the money to make changes right now!’  That is okay. Make one small change you can stick with and you will be amazed with the results you can get.

Whatever it is. Perhaps, it is dedicating yourself to reading a page or more of inspirational material each and every day when you get up. That isn’t much to commit to. 1 single page. Certainly, you could do more if you want but you could do at least a page.

Maybe you decide to listen to inspirational audio while you drive. That’s a great time to listen to motivational inspiring speakers. It is also a great time to shout out with enthusiasm your daily affirmations. It’s an excellent time for either or for both.

Or, you decide to spend 5 minutes focused on your goals first thing in the morning when you get up. You visualize yourself seeing yourself as already having all the changes you want. You imagine living and behaving in that positive reality.

Perhaps, you spend 5 minutes laughing when you arise. 5 minutes non-stop laughing. Or you laugh during your drive. You could commit to smiling more though out the day. Maybe, you commit to doing things each day that put a smile on someone else’s face.

You might decide to spice up your life by trying new things. You  use your opposite hand to eat, shave, comb your hair. You drive different ways to school or work. You walk places you have never been. You sleep with your head at the foot of the bed. Anything!

You keep a journal of all you are grateful for and as you list each thing you real spend a moment feeling the wonderful feelings. You decide to be nicer to the people around you.

You pay attention and really listen to people to understand. You monitor and manage your self-talk for a certain amount of time during the day. You meditate for 5, 20, 30 minutes a day.

You make it a point to stop complaining and blaming and you only speak about those things that uplift and make you and others feel good. You accentuate the positive. You speak only to bless, heal and prosper yourself and others.

You don’t have to do all of these.You could. Certainly they are all manageable.  But don’t bite off more than you can chew.

Pick one and commit to doing for no less than 30 days and perhaps a whole lot more. You will be surprised at what a difference it can make.

A little change, like a little faith, can move mountains.

Maybe, as you go along you discover you want to and can add in other things.  DO whatever pleases you and makes you feel wonderful.

But if you do nothing nothing will change.” Rex Sikes

Fill your day with delight!

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The Number 1 Reason Therapy Sucks!

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talking about problems greatest addiction

“I might upset a lot of people with this but hang in there. Stay open as your read. You may feel a tendency to shut down and dismiss but keep an open mind. I know it can be difficult to listen (read) all the way through, especially in this day and age but give it a shot. Try it. Hear me out.

Some therapy will keep you in therapy forever because they want you to sift though all your pain, hurt, defeat, heartbreak, anger, sadness, every grievance you may have had because they believe buried deep within you are unresolved hurts and issues. You must bring them to light of day, work on them and over come them. This is very well meaning but not most effective.

This approach will keep you in therapy for a longer time. It is a ruse, a dirty trick played on you. The goal of therapy should be healing and to get out of therapy. This business model works against you since you are charged by the session the doctor makes more the less success you have. Your problems line their pockets with cash. This happens when the focus is on managing issues (in any field) instead of the resolution of issues. There may be legitimate reasons too. Not everything is cut from the same cloth.

The same applies to self help products and seminars when, after you purchase their product they continue to upsell you on why the original product didn’t work in the first place. While it can be true in therapy or with products and seminars some troubleshooting may be required none of it should make you feel inadequate about your abilities to change. You should be focused on what you can positively and proactively do to be able to live the life you want to live.

Therapy Should Search To Find Your Strong Points 

The goal should be to find solutions, resources, talents, abilities,all your strong points and to get you out of therapy. The focus in much therapy, as practiced, IS IN EXACTLY THE WRONG PLACE.  It keeps you locked into seeing a therapist.

Let me say there are scores of well intending, compassionate understanding people who value this therapeutic approach and I realize I am stepping down hard on their toes. There are many who practice and receive therapy who believe in it. Benefit can be found anywhere if you look for it.

I have the utmost respect for all these people and do not intend to cause any discomfort – other than the mental kind that comes with entertaining an opposing idea. This is a call to examine and to be open and to improve the work that good people want to accomplish. It is meant to build in a particular direction not to tear down.

I hope you understand. That said, let’s move on!

Therapy Is Supposed To Be A Healing

It is supposed to be about Healing! Einstein said, ‘We can not solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them.’

You don’t heal the wound by continuing to pick at it. You treat it and let nature heal while you move on with your life. Digging into the wound, other than to immediately clean it out and identify what needs to be done, does not help it.

Understanding one’s problems and listing reasons for being stuck may placate for awhile but it does not necessarily resolve them. This approach causes us to continue to live with issues. We explore and find the reasons we are as we are.

We determine who or what we blame for our problems. We make excuses as to why we haven’t yet moved. Instead we should take responsibility for the problem, get over it and move ahead.

Energy Flows Where Your Attention  Goes

This concept has roots in most of the major religions. Napoleon Hill and the early thought leaders of the 20th century addressed this issue well. It is popularized in Law Of Attraction (LOA) literature.

Simply put: What you focus on expands. Whatever it is, good or bad, wanted or unwanted enlarges when you pay attention to it.  It expands when we put our attention on it. This is about where and how we place our attention!  Whatever you resist, persists! What you fight fights back.

Earl Nightengale stated it. So had Buddha, and Gandhi when they said,  ‘You become what you think about.’ This is another way of saying energy flows where your attention goes. What you think about you bring about. What you hold in your head you will hold in your hand.

It is the principle of Karma. It is cyclical. You get back what you put out there. Whatever you plant you will later reap. What you attempt to fix you focus on so you get more of the problem.

The problem for people attempting to resolve their problem this way is that focusing on the problem IS THE PROBLEM!

Birds Of A Feather Flock Together

The Law Of Attraction states like attracts like. Whatever it is! Good or bad! Positive attracts positive and negative attracts negative. SO if you are stuck and you focus on why you are stuck you get more stuck. It is simple really. What you think about you bring about.

No one tells you this because we have become so entrenched in thinking this is the way it is. We have been lead by an industry into thinking that digging a hole will get us closer to the other side. It won’t! We just end up with more and more dirt.

If you focus on what you do not want you put energy into what you do not want. How do you suppose you will get what you want while you are totally focused on what you don’t want? YOU WON’T!

No one tells you this because you are their paycheck. Even if they are well intending and it isn’t about the money this philosophy will keep you stuck for a long time. This form of therapy is not the answer. Caring people can nurture and promote a problem unintentionally. They don’t mean to but they don’t know any other way.

Withdraw The Energy From The Problem

The way of change is to withdraw the energy from the problem source. Let it go. Drop it. Then direct the mind to what you want instead. Focus on what you want and it expands. If you stop feeding plants or weeds they will wither and die. STOP FEEDING YOUR PROBLEMS!!!

The reason why a lot of change work doesn’t work and why people stay stuck IS because the solution to the problem does not exist at the same level the problem was created. We have to shift, step aside, go around, move over to the positive instead of focusing on the negative.

Stop It, Drop It, Let Go And Re-Direct Your Attention To Solutions

If you want your life to change you have to change things in your life. You can’t continue to do the same things over and over again and hope for a different positive result. It won’t happen. We are our habits and if we are habitually focused on what is wrong we are not ever going to get to what is right until we change those habits.

Focus On Your Strengths; Focus On What Is Right

You don’t get stronger focusing on your weaknesses. You don’t get better developing your weaknesses. You might get to mediocre by working on what you are least good at. You become the best by focusing on and developing what you are good at.

When you focus on your strengths, what you are best at, you have an opportunity to take them to a championship level. You maximize your strengths. You accentuate your abilities. Remember, whatever you focus on expands!

Instead of looking for why and where you are broken search for why and where you are good. Look for why and where you are healthy! Look for why and where you work perfectly well. Look for your resources. Look for you positive characteristics and attributes and emphasize those.

Develop Your Skills And Abilities

Get better at these. Develop you positive thoughts and feelings and you get more of them. What you focus on expands. You become what you think about! You will feel more positive about yourself. Your confidence and your competence will grow. You’ll begin to feel better and enjoy more well-being.

Stop focusing on how you aren’t enough and begin focusing on how you are more than enough. Focus on the light and life radiating within you. Stop getting in your own way by looking for dirt and begin to look for gold. It is there within, perhaps hidden, but you will find it as you look for it.

Develop your positive thoughts and feelings, attributes and characteristics. Develop the skills and abilities you are already good at. Your confidence and well being and wonderful thoughts about yourself will grow too and soon you will discover other positive truths about you. You’ll discover glorious feelings! You will rock your world.

Praise Yourself, Celebrate and Become Filled With Gratitude

Stop blaming and criticizing yourself. Be grateful for everything you have and don’t have. Be thankful for all of your experiences good and bad, for all the wonderful and all the horrible people in your life. Celebrate, be grateful, be free.

Take responsibility for it all! Don’t be a wimp don’t make excuses just accept responsibility for it all. 100% This puts you in charge. When you take control everything changes for the positive. You begin to determine the outcomes. You decide to live as a victor, a champion, and not a victim.

If you want your life to change you must change things in your life. Change your thoughts. Stop blaming yourself, others and the world! Accept total responsibility for everything. Even if you disagree with this premise it allows you to be in charge and at cause rather that at the effect of others and circumstances.

Choose! Would you rather live from a place of compassionate, benevolent power or would you prefer to be a slave and a victim to problems? Would you rather live strong or weak? It is completely up to you and ONLY you.

Stop looking for what is wrong and for what doesn’t work and begin to look for what is right. Develop these things! As you do you will stop being weak and you will start being strong. That happens when you come into your own power. You will celebrate yourself! You will also find reasons to celebrate others.

You will be nicer, friendlier, more loving and develop better relationships when you embrace your strengths. It is a natural part of your development when you focus on the positive rather than the negative. You become kinder. You become more accepting. You learn change is easier than you originally thought!

Transform Yourself And Your Entire Life Transforms

You develop a strong sense of helpfulness and co-operation while at the same time you learn to establish boundaries. You say yes to more of what you want and no to what you don’t want. You stop wasting your time and enjoy life more.  You end victimhood and you stop being a doormat when you take charge of your life.

It is amazingly powerful! This is life transforming! You learn to shift awareness from problems to solutions. You’ll move away from the unwanted toward the wanted; away from the negative to the positive. You will develop new positive habits for staying focused in positive ways on what works, what is helpful, what you want and enjoy!

Stop! Don’t be one of these people who spend years trying to figure out what is wrong. They would be better served if they focused on developing strengths instead of discovering their weaknesses

Keep in mind the American Psychiatric (and Psychological) Associations philosophies of practices focus on the diagnosis and treatment of problems. Keep in mind psychology, just like medicine, is a practice. It is about diagnosis and repair. These practitioners are not gods, they are only expressing opinions based on their training biases and really nothing more. Actually, that is true about anyone.

If all you have is a hammer you treat everything as a nail. If the focus is on problems you’ll find problems everywhere. This mindset applies to you and me first and foremost. We must look for solutions if we want to find them.

It is accurate to say that in USA we do not promote health and prevention as much as we practice diagnosis, repair and management when necessary. We have little in the way of preventative medicine in our country but this movement has been growing slowly for decades now. Still, one can see the obvious battle between the corporate powers that be and those helping to bring about change.

Concetrate On Health And Well-Being For Yourself

Even though we don’t promote wellness as much people can find benefit anywhere and everywhere. Nothing is written in stone. We can all change regardless of what approach we take. Be positive! Be optimistic. Expect to find solutions and you can.

Perception is everything as are our expectations. People tend to rise to what is expected of them! Look to what is healthy and positive! Look into what is healthy and is positive.

Your goal is to have an incredible, loving, fun-filled, joyous successful life. Perception is everything. Orientation is everything. Framing is everything. Don’t submit to the limitations of philosophies. You deserve better.

See solutions, talents, abilities, resources. See positive potential wanting to be released. There are victors who chose to live as victims because they drank ‘the sugary drink’.  Stop it! Believe in yourself. Believe in the ease at which you can change.

Let me make this point very clear. This blog is not about criticizing the system although there is plenty that could be said. This is not meant to criticize countless numbers of helpful, beneficial practitioners of change. If you are in therapy and it is working for you celebrate and be grateful. That is what it should be doing regardless of the approach. I am all for doing what works!

My emphasis is that people put attention in the wrong place. This should be very clear. Therapy, as practiced by many, sucks because of what people focus on. The emphasis is on the problem. The same is the case for people not in therapy. They put their attention in the wrong place. This post is about where you put your attention and where to put it to get the most benefit! Please don’t miss this point.

Change work should be about healing and solutions. It could be about resources and strengths. WHETHER OR NOT someone is in therapy the point remains the same because this is really NOT about therapy! If you focus on the negative that is what you get more of. Stop focusing so much on problems. If you are going to find a therapist find one who focuses on solutions! They are out there!

I must keep reminding the reader: this point of this post is where WE place OUR attention! You must place your attention where it does the most good! Focus on the positive, your talents, your abilities, your strengths. You will find more of them when you put your attention on these! If you want your life to change you must change things you are thinking, paying attention to, and doing. You have to change some things to change your life. When you focus on developing your strengths your confidence increases as a result.

Expect Change To Be Easy And It Will Be. Perception is Everything

You can live an amazing, wonderful, joy-filled life NO MATTER WHAT. Your past doesn’t equal your future. Whatever you did or however you lived before that was then. Now is the time to make the change. Now is the time to start developing the positive habits that you will use to have the best life ever!

Live victoriously. Claim it! Live as a victor. Live and think and act and feel like a winner. You deserve to. Have a glorious life! Focus on what you want and can do. Focus on enjoying it all. Celebrate and becoming grateful for everything.

Make the changes you want to make. You can be, do and have anything you want. So do it! Be responsible for your life from this moment forward. There are more incredible and delightful moments ahead for you than you can even begin to imagine right now!” Rex Sikes

What a wonderful new day to delight in!

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Acceptance, Act As If, Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Celebration, Confidence, Creating The Future, Decision, Energy, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Getting Over The Past, Gratitude, Happiness, Intentional Thinking, Overcoming Difficulty, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Success, Unlimited Power

The Number One Reason Therapy Sucks!

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Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Confidence, Decision, Focus, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Rehearsal And Practice, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Success

Forget Your Weaknesses: Develop Your Strengths!

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opportunity is missed by most - edison

“If you learned you need to get better at what you are poor at you learned wrong. If your parents or teachers or anyone told you to develop and work on your weaknesses they were incorrect. You could spend a lot of time devoted to what you aren’t good at and be wasting a lot of your time!

Stop! Make a change that will bring you better results and greater satisfaction. Work on and develop your strengths! Take what you are good at and get great at it! This makes the most sense. This will get you the best result for your efforts.

Your Strengths Give You The Edge

Take your talents to the next level and the level after that. Your strengths are what you should be furthering. Who knows how far you could go if you focused on making your best even better? 

Developing your weaknesses sounds good but if you suck at something how long will it take until you are mediocre at it? Meanwhile, the best you got is languishing. It is silly to let your best go to waste while you focus on what you are the least good at.

Remember, what you focus on expands. What you think about most you become. What you put out there comes back to you. SO why spend all your time putting energy into what you aren’t very good at?

Put Your Energy Into Where You Are Good And Excel!

Emphasize and spend time with all that is the best of you. Think about what you are good at rather than what you aren’t good at. Focus on your strengths and develop those. Your strong points give you the edge your weaknesses won’t.

If you are bad at something and you keep trying to get better at it its more apt to break your confidence and crush your spirit. Build up your wins, feel the best, and live from where you are strong.

It makes sense if you are socially inept, if you aren’t able to communicate well; if you can not look another person in the eye and talk to them than yes, you should develop your skills to be able to do so. One of the best ways you do that is to develop your confidence.

Focusing On Your Best Develops Your Confidence

How do you develop confidence? You develop your confidence by making your best better. You feel confident when you take stock of and keep in mind what you are good at; you remember your talents and abilities. Confidence comes from winning and excelling.

It is wiser to start at the top and go higher than to begin at the bottom and work your way up to the middle. Skyrocket don’t struggle.

Be confident while staying humble. Bragging isn’t real confidence it is based in fear. When you really are good you know it you don’t have to prove it.

In your career, your occupation, your job, even your school you can bet you will be rewarded with a promotion or a raise or an honorable notice for what you are best at not what you suck at. Put your best foot forward not your worst. Develop your skills and abilities. You will be glad you did!” Rex Sikes

It is your day to make what you will of it!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.