Category Archives: Curiosity

Attention, Curiosity, Listening, Respect

How To Get Along With Others Part 2

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“Recently, I mentioned a young woman, I’d overheard having a  discussion with an older gentleman. She mentioned she liked a group meeting she had attended the day before. His immediate reply was, ‘I don’t like that group.’  What could he have done instead?

He could ask questions. He COULD have asked questions without wanting or needing or bothering to give an opinion. If he wished to acknowledge and respect her he could have asked, ‘that’s great, what do  you like about it?’ He could encourage her to speak more.

He could have said, ‘fascinating! Will you go back? What did you discover? How did you find out about it?’ Were there many people?’  He could’ve been curious! He could have listened. Instead, he rendered an opinion that was not asked for. She was sharing.

Energy Flows Where Attention Goes – Create A Good Connection

She was telling him something she discovered and enjoyed. He immediately dissed it and her. I don’t think he intended to. He was just unaware of what he was doing. So many of us are AND much of the time. We are too eager to give our point of view.  Get it?

We say what we like or don’t when someone voices theirs. We don’t need to. They didn’t ask us for our opinon. If they do, we can give it without being offensive. We could say something like, ‘I am glad you really like it. It’s just not for me.’ We validate and add information.

We could say, ‘marvelous, it didn’t resonate with me’, or ‘I have been going to a different group I like. I fit in better in my group.’ Why do you suppose when you say ‘I like pizza’ someone feels compelled to  say, ‘not me!’ Perhaps you have do this. I certainly have. Silly human.

People Tend To Like People Who Like The Same Things They Do

Instead of saying, ‘wow. really what do you like about it?  Why do you like? I haven’t really enjoyed it that much but I’d be curious. Maybe I’m missing something? How do you like it? What toppings?’ Get it? We can listen and request more information. Let them share!

It is about how we treat others. Do we listen to listen, or do we listen just so we can give our opinion? Do we listen just to speak? If you want to be respectful, be curious. Say, ‘fascinating, why do you think that?’ They are entitled to have an opinion. Let them have it freely.

We don’t have to argue over every like and dislike. If you both looked at a painting you don’t have to go to battle over it. You can simply say, ‘what do you like about it? Oh, that is interesting. I hadn’t thought about it that way. I hadn’t noticed that.’ Encourage them.

Like Attracts Like – Birds Of A Feather Flock Together

If they ask you if you liked it, you can be honest without being disrespectful or hurting them. You can say, ‘I don’t feel about it as you do. It doesn’t speak to me in that way.’ You are entitled to your opinion to. Just know when to, and when not to, give it. GET IT?

Treat people with respect. How respectful are you? We don’t need to give our opinion to everyone all the time. I know, we want to. So do I.  We just need to listen more. Give our attention and respect to the people we associate with. Let them know we value them.

Then we help them feel valued and help them feel understood. Then they feel listened to. Be interested in the other person. When their interests are in your heart  they will feel it. They will feel comfortable and like being around you if you make them feel good.

Attention – Respect – Kindness – Caring – Love – Acceptance Last

Go first. The responsibility is always on us. It is on them too if they know these principles and practices. Not everyone does. Be an example. Be a role model. Be the change you want to see in the world. Be kind, understanding, patient and accepting. You can be.

When you give your full undivided attention to another and really listen without simply wanting to speak they will feel it. Your nonverbal behaviors will demonstrate you are a respectful, good person. They really will feel it. WHY? Because so few people do this.

People want to shout out their opinions on social media and in public more and more, it seems. We don’t have to oppose each other. We can embrace each other and even our differences. It is a choice. Ask questions. Further the conversation rather than end it. Be curious.

You Win More Bears With Honey Than With Vinegar

You don’t have to, of course, but if you want a deeper rapport with people who are important to you AND those you’d like to be more important , then you will really listen more and speak less. Discover how you can share your point of view in meaningful ways. Connect with others first and they will want to hear from you, too. It is reciprocal. Make you moments magical with many more people. Celebrate everything!”

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Beliefs, Creating The Future, Curiosity, Paradigms

Drop The Old Behold The New

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“What stops us from leaping ahead and getting everything we want? Many people think it is what they do not know. That is incorrect. It isn’t what you don’t know that holds you back. It is what you do know that prevents you. Your mindset can be the limitation.

Science makes great strides and progresses by making a thesis and then trying to disprove it. If it can’t be disproved they accept it as a theory, until a better theory comes along to replace it. That is the nature of science, from theory to better theory. Progress is made.

Still, often times, the very people who explore the unknown, get wedded to what they already know, and forget their own scientific method. They state that something is impossible and can never be the case because of what they already know. Mindset traps us.

Going Into The Unknown Is How You Expand The Known

Even the best of us get caught in that mental trap. Scientists, on the forefront of progress can maintain something is impossible because they are relying on the science and studies of yesterday. Instead, of resisting they’d be better served by proposing a new theory.

The experts at doing things are often the very ones who tell us something can’t be done. It isn’t because of what we don’t know, because what we don’t know, we do not know. It is because of what we think we do know and we don’t. We can’t know everything.

Limitations exist mostly in our thinking. Those who make great breakthroughs aren’t limited by the known or the unknown. They remain open and positive. They can find or create a way. Often they are ridiculed and ostracized. Those who persist find the way.

Trust And Embrace The Unknown – Expect A Miracle

The same is true with each of us. We look to our history, our past, our prior results or lack of them, our outdated mental conditioning we adopted from others while growing up, and based on these less than useful assumptions decide we can’t do something.

We feel we don’t have what t takes or aren’t good enough. We blame ourselves or the world. We lose out. We miss opportunity because our focus isn’t on opportunity and what can be done, but on what isn’t working, why it isn’t working and what is wrong with us.

In order to do better we must go beyond what we know. We must forget and let go of limitations in our thinking. We must drop the conditioning that holds us back. Create new, positive, powerful thought habits and take inspired action to move ahead.

There Is No Failure There Is Only Feedback To Learn From

The past doesn’t equal the future. Learn from mistakes. Learn that you have abilities and resources within you that you have never, ever even begun to tap into, because your limited attention was on what was wrong and didn’t work. That is because of old conditioning!

Time to stop and decide a new unseen, unknowable way is possible. Time to put faith in you and jump light years ahead of where you are because you let go of everything that has held you back. Time to explore the unknown and discover how incredible you truly are.

If you don’t yet believe it RIGHTE THERE is an example of the limited thinking and conditioning you need to change. Stop believing the lies that say you can’t. Start believing you can. Then right now start doing something in a big, flamboyant, wonderful way.

You Can Always Find Or Create A Way – Become Invincible

Get jazzed. Feel thrilled. Get excited, enthused and joyful. Put a smile on your face. Sing, skip, dance! Move and shake things up. Put your energy into positive motion. Create what you want by discovering joy and passion and happiness that is right now.

Be grateful. Be thankful. Be positive. Be inspiring and motivating. Be alive for goodness sake. Raise the bar on your personal energy. You are more attractive and attract more when you do. Let go and let god as they say. Trust good things will happen. Make good things happen.

From your joy and passion create what you want. Stop focusing on the crap and the lack and the I can’t, the whining and complaining and blaming and excusing and take 100% responsibility for making good things happen. Make one good thing happen today.

Find Your Love Joy And Acceptance Of Yourself – And All Else 

Big or small. Do it. Do something positive that puts a smile on your face, someone else’s face and makes you both feel uplifted, Compliment someone, praise, give them a tiny gift. Enjoy everything around you. Find the good and the new. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

What can you find to be thrilled about today?

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Acceptance, Communicating, Curiosity, Trust

How To Know What Is Really Important!

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“To get people to do what you want you have to appeal to who they are. People have beliefs and values that are important to them. They have rules and procedures for how to eliminate woes, and  how to best go about living in the world, succeeding and being happy.

They function by principles, rules, evidence and procedures. We may explore each of these in coming blogs but today I want to broach the subject of values. We all have values.  Some we share with others and some unique to the individuals.

Where values are shared there can be rapport. What is important to you and to me may be our bridge that brings us closer together. Unless we are both competing to fulfill those. It really isn’t much different than you like latte’s and I like latte’s. It is similar.

You’ll Find A Way If It Is Important To You If Not You’ll Find Excuse

We share something in agreement. We both agree it is important to be honest, or loyal or tolerant. Yet how we define these and apply them could vary wildly. Many couples vacation together. It is important for them to get away and spend together time.

What is important about that vacation may wildly differ between them. They could be in for a wonderful or rough time depending on what is most important to each. Whether or not they help each other fulfill what is important to them will determine their success.

For example one partner can’t wait to get away and have loads of fun. This person wants to wine and dine and dance. They want to go out and party, see the sights, meet the people and experience a grand and wild time. They can’t wait until they can let loose!

Ask What Is Really Important Then Find A Way To Deliver On That

The other partner can’t wait to get away from the rat race and relax. They want to leave the madness of the city behind. No phones, no pressures, no deadlines, no people to bother with. They just want to sitt by the water and chill out. They want to savor their time away.

Can you imagine these two may have some difficulty? Perhaps, they’d be better taking separate vacations. Many people get there and then argue that it isn’t going well as they had expected. Why? Because their expectations were never really voiced. Imagined, yes.

Had they talked it out upfront it could be much better. All they need to do is ask, what is important to you about this vacation? What do you hope it to be? What do you want to do? Then they will find out they both have separate and different desires and expectations.

Agreement In Likes And Dislikes Is The Beginning Of Rapport

They can then decided whether or not to vacation together OR how to insure that both of their needs and wants are met during the time they are together. They negotiate quiet relaxing times and wild out there party times. Then both can feel fulfilled and get along.

They help each other out by helping each other get what is important and necessary for each. They work together to make sure both are well cared for and not abused or ignored. Get it? Because they know what is important to each they can work together.

To get along easily with another person appeal to what is important to them. Look them in the eye and say, ‘what is important to you?’ What is important to you about this? What does that, or having that do for you or allow you to do? So few people ever ask. We need to.

Friendship Comes From Trust Uplifting And Valuing Each Other 

‘What is important to you about being a parent?’  ‘What is important to you about racing cars?’ ‘What is important to you about going to that school?’ ‘What is important to you about your boyfriend?’ What is important to you? Then listen and accept their answer.

For practice, whatever their answer, repeat it back to them respectfully. Don’t look at them bewildered and exclaim,  ‘WHAAAAT?  FUN?!?!? is important???’ Be respectful. Accept whatever they say. It is what IS important to them. Treat it so!

‘So fun is important? Very cool. What does having fun do for you? Their answer may reveal another value. Let’s say they said confidence. ‘Cool, so when you have fun you feel confident, or you have a sense of confidence.’ It doesn’t have to make sense to you.

Trust Comes From Understanding And Taking Positive Actions

It makes sense to them. Respect and accept that. Listen and let them know you care. You hold them in high regard. You will do whatever you can to help them fulfill their positive values. When you accept, without judging or ridiculing, you create more harmony and rapport.

You help create understanding and trust. You connect more deeply and you are getting to know each other more deeply because you are learning about what they are trying to fulfill in their life. If not their whole life at least in this topic area. It is important to them.

We have some values which permeate all areas of our life. Some might call these Core Values and we have others that are more situational. Our beliefs and rules and procedures and processes similarly can be situational or core. We will explore more later.

It’s Not Just What’s Important To Them It’s How They Fulfill That

For now, remember to ask people what is important to them. Genuinely be interested. Listen and respect their answers. Utilize what they tell you to help them fulfill their wants and needs and you will may benefit them greatly. Use it to build trust and rapport.

Your understanding of what motivates them and what challenges them will grow immensely. It will help you understand your partner in life, your parents or children, friends, co-workers, employers and employees. You will learn a lot about the people in your world.

Enjoy them. Enjoy learning. Delight in all things. Appreciate these tools you have to build bridges. Understanding what makes another person ‘tick’  bring us closer together. It helps eliminate hinderances and misunderstanding.  It allows us create win /win outcomes so we can get along and each feel fulfilled. Celebrate. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Smile more today!

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Creativity, Curiosity, Imagination, Paradigms

Don’t Stop Yourself With Limited Thinking

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“You know, when one person asks a question, it can mean many others had the same, similar or other questions but didn’t ask. Others may have have thought the very same thing. People may have made similar comments too if they were so inclined.

With that in mind I decided to re-post an answer I made to someone who commented, because the same principle applies to comments. In this case, a person, commented they would prefer their heart surgeon had knowledge over imagination.

He further stated he was tired of people using Einstein and his words, quotes, as if he were the barometer of infallibility. My reply follows.

Imagination Creates Reality –  Live Out Your Imagination

‘LOL! I do! I want my heart surgeon to have knowledge, be skilled and creative or imaginative to think outside the box to trouble shoot or problem solve on his or her feet. I want the person top of their game. I don’t want a mere mechanic; technical skill only.

I want the best of the best and that includes more than just knowledge. A point to consider. This is a blog post. Not a book or far longer discussion. Hence, there isn’t room for all the examples and counter-examples possible.

I focus on the point or the couple points I am making. There is always room for alternatives, other options and disagreement. Hey, Einstein was proven wrong, about many things, long ago. That doesn’t make his contributions any less poignant.

What Is Now Proved Was Once Only Imagined

He is not a final authority in anything but a decent contributor to the human race. His efforts and benefits way outshine mine, to say the least. I have no problem using a quote, Einstein or otherwise, if it makes a good point.

Who said it may, sometimes, be far less important than what is posited. Other times, the opposite may be the case. The point of the post is don’t stop yourself with limited thinking. Don’t stop at the known but go beyond and into new territory.

Adventure, explore and discover. Adventure, explore and discover.

There is always enough to stop us, but the courageous, the curious, the creative, the fun seekers may go further then others who quit at the obvious, or at the first sign of hardship, physical or mental. Quitting or stopping thinking doesn’t bring much about.

Stop Letting Your Thoughts Control You – You Control Them

An idea to pursue, a purpose, a passion can change the world. People who easily quit do exactly that. They quit. I don’t want my heart surgeon to give up because the problem exceeds his/her expertise. I want the person to seek other possible legitimate solutions.

I don’t want ordinary thinkers. I want open minds. BTW I love that you engage and comment. Thanks for sharing!’ Well, there you have it. My reply. You may or may not agree with me. That’s fine. I am not seeking agreement. I am hoping to provoke thought.

I am hoping we take charge of our thoughts, our minds, our emotions and behaviors and begin getting the results we want to get. There are always enough excuses and distractions to stop us. Let’s find the reasons to see it all the way through to the end and beyond.

Nothing Really Stops You – Only You Can Stop You – Stop That

Make your dreams come true. Have fun, enjoy life. Become financially free. Live with passion. Connect deeply and meaningfully with others. Find blessings in all moments. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Delight in this day!

*** We are planning some new things! Soon  A Teleseminar with Rex  What are your questions, what do you want to know, what would you like help with? Use the comment section to let me know. I’ll let you know when, meanwhile, please let me know what you’d like. ***

Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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Acceptance, Choice, Curiosity, Responsibility

How To Stop Fighting With Others And Yourself

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“I was in 7th or 8th grade and called to fight by another classmate. That meant waiting until after school and meeting up and ‘duking it out’. He was my size but tougher. I thought I was pretty tough but basically was a wimp and afraid. I never really wanted to fight.

After school he and his ‘gang’ gathered. I walked out with my friends. Soon two opposing camps faced each other hurling insults. His supporters razzing me and cheering him on, mind doing likewise. We were about to fight. He called me names and taunted.

In a moment, that seemed very long, I had a lucid awareness. I look at this other kid. We had been friends once. We liked each other. Now, I don’t remember what the fight about, but it was likely over a girl. I looked at him angry at me, calling me names. I saw his friends.

There Are Only Two Options – Make Progress Or Make Excuses

They were calling me names. I looked around. My friends were calling he and them names. We were squared off and I went somewhere else momentarily. I thought, he thinks, I am an ass. I think he is an ass. His friends think I am an ass. My friends think he is.

We all think the same thing about each other. We are two opposing sides. We are angry and yelling at each other. Each side, each potential fighter thinks he is correct. What if they are right? What if I am right? What difference does any of this make? Why are we mad?

He is correct. I am an ass at times. I can be, I know that. I don’t want to admit that. I’m not very proud of it. Typically, if you call me on my crap I’ll get angry and defend myself, at least verbally. I will attack you back BUT not this time. Something happened! An awareness!

You Don’t Stop A Fight By Fighting – You Stop By Stopping To Fight

I couldn’t find a reason to fight. It was insane. We both are caught up in disliking each other. Our gangs don’t know anything about anything. They are just sheep following and supporting us. WOW, what is going on? I knew right then there was no ultimate truth.

At least not in this name calling. We were both right! We were both also wrong about each other. We were just yelling opinions and none of any of us actually in touch with anything accurate or real. We were all just acting out some insane hatred for each other.

I came back to hear the taunts and name calling. I said, ‘hey I don’t want to fight with you’. I wasn’t afraid. I just discovered I had NO reason not to like him, I had no reason to fight. He swung at me I swung back and punched right into his fist. He cried out in pain!

When You Stop Fighting The Way Things Are Magic Can Happen

He fell to the ground, crying and rolling around. Later, we learn he broke some fingers. It was over. He writhed on the ground, I stood there stunned and secretly glad it hadn’t gone any further. I was heralded as victor by my gang. Of course, his didn’t think so.

But they didn’t argue. He was on the ground and I stood over him. None of any of this mattered. I swung, I don’t know why. Instinct, I assume. I knew, however, I didn’t want to fight and was not going to. We left the scene. I thought about the event for quite some time.

I realized, so often, we choose a side and then defend it no matter what. We have a position or a stance and we maintain it or try to, regardless. We hurt loved ones, friends and strangers  by wanting to be right. We look for or hang with those who think as we do.

If You Can’t Change It – Change The Way You Think About It

We are not tolerant of other views or people, except rarely, or unless we learn to accept and embrace difference. We have to learn to be okay with differences. We can’t ignore them but we don’t have to fear or hate or exclude them either. We can learn to let go and allow.

There is too much hate and discord. Violence has never ever solved anything. Might doesn’t make right. More often it only makes more enemies. No one likes a bully whether on the schoolyard or in the pulpit. Still, people cheer their ‘team’. They follow as lemmings do.

Thinking and feeling seem in short supply. We need to accurately assess and not be so opinionated. We need to not be ruled by opinions; our own or others. We need to be able to be curious, open, accepting and tolerant of those and that which differs from us.

Letting Go Doesn’t Mean Giving Up But Rather Acceptance

We need to listen more and stop shouting. We need to listen actively and hear what others say and not just wait our turn to speak. HEARING and LISTENING are not the same thing. We need to understand. First comes awareness then comes understanding.

We need to be more peaceful not more fearful. Making others fear us does’t make us stronger or better. We only create more enemies. We need to think peace and then act it. We need to feel more compassion and less intolerance. Seek to elevate not to bring down.

We need to stop creating problems and enemies. We need to create more friends. We need to become responsible and realize it is up to each of us. It is up to you and me to live peacefully. We must overcome our conditioning and habits and prejudices. We can!

Time Doesn’t Heal Everything But Acceptance Can – Use Time Well

Together we can accomplish more than we are capable of as individuals. Yes, there is power in numbers. Mobs rule. Let’s create and be part of friendly, loving mobs. Instead of sinking to the lowest common denominator lets seek to rise to the highest.

Let’s not lower our standards but raise them; not to exclude but to include more. Lets expect the best of ourselves, then actually do it, Let’s not just  talk and wish it happens. Let’s be determined to be the change we want to see in the world. Determine to be the change!

It starts within each of us. Live well and help others do the same. Be grateful, find the good in each person and all circumstances. Live, love, laugh! Be filled with compassion. Spread it and share it all around. Delight in differences and diversity! Celebrate everything.”

Delight in today!

*** We are planning some new things! Soon  A Teleseminar with Rex  What are your questions, what do you want to know, what would you like help with? Use the comment section to let me know. I’ll let you know when, meanwhile, please let me know what you’d like. ***

Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

If you think these posts would help others please share them. Help Spread the word. Comment and provide feedback and requests.

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Conditioning, Curiosity, Focus, Healthy Choices

What And Why You Must Read To Be Happy And Successful!

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“I write long posts often. There is a reason for that. Leaders are readers. People who read tend to get further in their lives than others who don’t. Most famous leaders and innovators spend large portions of their daily time in reading and most importantly in study.

Reading to  gain knowledge is important, but it is also important for brain development and health. When you read you make mental images and mental connections. When you watch movies most of the images and sounds are supplied for you. You don’t do much.

When you read and when you implement what you read you grow new neural pathways. You grow your brain, the structure is actually enhanced. When you write and take notes, BY HAND, in script, you enhance brain structure and grow new neural connections.

Reading Reduces Stress And Mentally Stimulates Your Thinking

When you review and re-write your notes you are helping to wire in your learning, to make it more memorable and available for use. Learning is active and passive. The more you put into your learning the more you get back the benefits from it. It is very brain healthy.

You should read daily, as much as you can, but a least a page. Fill your mind with that which you want more of. Inspiration, motivation, creativity, positivity; use your imagination. Your brain is like a muscle that grows the more you use it. Review, re-write and re-word often.

Put what you read into your own words. Share it with others. Talk about what the author wrote. Every week or two review your notes. Re-write them. Re-word your own notes. The more you frequently review the more insight and understanding you derive.

Reading Increases Your Knowledge Your Vocabulary And Memory

Today, people don’t want to read. There are too many electronic distractions. Today, people flit from thing to thing without keeping their energy or attention on one subject. Focus and concentration is lost. We need to re-develop that. Learn to concentrate again.

When you spend time reading positive and inspiration material you fill your mind and being with possibilities, as well as, know how. You open up your horizons and expand your world. There really is no replacement for reading. Spend time reading each day.

I know some people won’t read my blogs because they are long. I also know those who take the time to read my long posts will benefit in many ways those others won’t. Read, study, engage your mind. Fill your mind positively. Pick up a book and dive into it.

It Improves You Analytical Skills Your Focus And Concentration

Find out what books those who live ultra happy and successful lives like to read and read those. Read what thought leaders and millionaires are reading. Discover which books and authors influenced them onto greatness in their lives. Study success!

Spend more time reading and reviewing and re-writing and re-wording and you will change your life for the better. Make the material you read your own. Embrace and embody what you learn rather than just adding facts and figures to your knowledge base. Read, learn, delight, APPLY and celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Use today to delight yourself and loved ones even more!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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Attitude, Beliefs, Creating The Future, Curiosity, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Habit Formation, Intentional Thinking, Paradigms, Personal Development, Trust

Neuroplasticity Defined In 1912 Verified Recently With PET Technology

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“This is so cool! A book written in 1912 describes what we now know today.  Because of technology we presently have the means to verify what was claimed back over 100 years ago. Even further back.

They knew without having the ability to prove it.  Since the advent of PET, CAT and MRI technologies we now know what happens in the brain as people think. We can see it. What is cool is they knew it long ago without any of this supporting technology.

The brain actually evolves. It develops new neural pathways and alters its structure. It can do so for the better or for the not so good. Either it grows healthier or unhealthier. Scientists can determine, post mortem, a happy brain from an unhappy one.

Today, we can image these results how the brain changes and grows neural networks. 100 years ago and more we could not. Frequently, science only confirms what we already know to be the case, and that is okay.

I leave you with this fascinating quote by Charles Haanel, a pioneer in the New Thought movement. Haanel and others, at the turn of the 20th century, made remarks about brain and body that ancient teachers proclaimed centuries before.

Current research into brain confirms neuroplasticity; and the notion that we have more than one brain, receptors in the gut; that heart coherence plays an important role. It inform us, how we learn and develop habits and evolve ourselves.

This quote describes neuroplasticity and the matching function of the Reticular Activating System (RAS) I discussed a lot in this blog. I think it is pretty darn cool. Perhaps, you will as well.

‘Every thought brings into action certain physical tissue, parts of the brain, nerve or muscle. This produces an actual physical change in the construction of the tissue. Therefore it is only necessary to have a certain number of thoughts on a given subject in order to bring about a complete change in the physical organization of a man.  This is the process by which failure is changed to success.

Thoughts of courage, power, inspiration, harmony, are substituted for thoughts of failure, despair, lack, limitation and discord, and as these thoughts take root, the physical tissue is changed and the individual sees life in a new light,  old things have actually passed away, all things have become new, he is born again, this time born of the spirit, life has a new meaning for him, he is reconstructed and is filled with joy, confidence, hope, energy.

He sees opportunities for success to which he was heretofore blind. He recognizes possibilities which before had no meaning for him. The thoughts of success with which he has been impregnated are radiated to those around him, and they in turn help him onward and upward; he attract to him new and successful associates, and this in turn changes his environment; so that by this simple exercise of thought, a man changes not only himself, but his environment, circumstances and conditions.’ Charles Haanel, The Master Key.

We can learn a lot from those who have gone before us. There is much wisdom in some older writings. I love to study them. This quote provides us another example of how all knowledge is always available. We just don’t know how to discover it, until we do. Then in looking back it becomes obvious. Life IS a marvelous mystery to celebrate and enjoy!” Rex Sikes

During the day delight often!

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Sometimes It Is Better To Inch Your Way Along

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“Everyone needs to rest. It can’t be all work and no play. You want to make sure you have fun too while you pursue your goals. You want to enjoy what you are doing or you won’t do it for very long. You need rest too. You need to replenish. Chill and relax. Nurture yourself! Take good care of yourself.

Sometime, people effort too much. You see it every new year. People make all sorts of resolutions. They rush to the gyms. They buy equipment. Then they over do until they eventually quit. Better to do less and continue than try to do too much and quit early.

Have Fun – Get Rest- Nourish Yourself – Enjoy Everything

Still, every year lots of people will abandon their goals because making changes takes too much time or effort. These people often don’t figure out the easy way to make new changes fit into their already busy lives. Don’t fall into this trap.

Ease your way along. Instead of going for the overhaul go for the upgrade. To inch your way to you destination is better than to go fast right away and run out of gas. You eat an elephant bite by bite. Drop by drop fills the tub. Be consistent and persistent and you will get there. Allow yourself to enjoy it all as you journey along.

Small Steps Consistently Taken Will Get You There

The same principle applies whenever you discover yourself feeling down and out or thinking less than glorious thoughts. Learn to switch from the less than glorious to the glorious whenever you notice you aren’t feeling so good. This is when you become aware that something is off.

Realize and remember the less than glorious feelings ARE the signal that something is off. The way you correct it IS to switch from thinking negative to thinking more positive thoughts. The less than glorious feelings are the alert signal to get YOUR OWN attention.

Use Your Body’s Alert Signal System To Make Positive Changes

When your thinking isn’t productive your body responds with less than good feelings. Once you notice this  it is THE time to begin the change. It is up to you to do whatever positive things you need to to feel better.

Work your way up the ladder of good feelings and thinking. Inch yourself into feeling better bit by bit. You may not be able to leap from feeling down to feeling bliss. So do little things that make you feel better bit by bit. Walk, read, rest, get a massage, talk with a friend. These will help you change your thoughts and feelings!

Better To Do A Little Something Than A Lot Of Nothing

Spend time with family, kids, help someone else, enjoy a pet. Smile more. Affirm. Ask yourself positive questions. Pay attention to what is good, what feels good, what is new that you haven’t noticed before. Look for things to be grateful about. Meditate and let go.

Eventually, you will begin feel better. Steer your thinking to more positive thoughts and you will feel more positive. Continue these practices until you are once again able to hold your positive dreams in your mind and  feel wonderful.

Take Control – Captain Your Ship – Steer Yourself There

Inch your way up. Step by step until you feel wonderful. If you do this every time you feel down or negative you will create a new habit for feeling better. You will be create new neural pathways or mental routes. It is incredibly valuable for you you take charge and initiate the change when you notice something is off!

Ultimately, you learn that you are able to direct your thoughts and feelings productively. You discover that you are in charge more of the time. As you become aware of this, more and more life improves all along the way. You will have created some really useful positive habits and changes. So celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

There is plenty to enjoy today! Can you find it?

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How To Go Beyond The Limits Of Your Own Thinking?

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“How does this all this positivity work? Well you can, stay open to new possibilities; focus on what you can do and that which is productive and positive.  When you feel less than glorious, take it as a signal to, check your thinking and then change it. The goal is to feel good and be positive most of your time.

Most of your time is spent not being positive. While it may not be totally negative a huge portion of our time is spent in wasted thoughts and feelings. Petty annoyances and grievances, daily duties that drag us down instead of uplift us. The percentage of time we spend thinking of what we want, our purpose or dominant chief aim pales by comparison.

We need to tip the scales in favor of positive thinking. We need to feel good more of the time than simply okay or bad. When we feel good most of the time, when we are delighted and enjoying our energy is up, our creative abilities are up, we are resonating and vibrating high. We are attractive and attracting. All is well!

I repeat these much needed messages again and again.  We have to hear these messages multiple time, in different ways, before they begin to seep in. Each of us, including me, needs to be reminded of what we can do and what we are capable of, from time to time. We want to spend most of our day and each day wonderfully.

Right Awareness Is Awareness Without Tension

Sometime we feel down and out. I have. There are times I am not uber positive. I have thought, ‘yeah right, if only’. Then I felt uneasy. Soon I began to feel bad too. Then it hit me. I was getting a signal. There were no alarm bells, no flashing lights, no big signals,  just a nagging, ‘yes, but’. The negative was seeping in not storming in.

When I recognized that I was thinking and feeling less than glorious I realized I needed to change my thinking. Awareness is the moment we have when everything can change in an instant. In that second we make a decision. We either decide to continue as is or change something.

I began to think about things I am grateful for. What right now in this moment can I appreciate. I can even celebrate the nagging feeling that is the signal because eventually I figured out what was going on. Not everything is flashing lights and blowing horns. Some things are more subtle.

I began to question the negativity too. I thought, ‘even if this were true why would I choose to be unhappy?’  ‘If I can choose any feeling why not choose to feel happy right now in spite of what is going on?” I realized I don’t have to be happy about the circumstances to be happy. I don’t have to be happy about bad news to be happy. I can be happy in spite of these things.

Our Quality Of Life Depends On The Quality Of Our Questions

I began to think ‘sure why not’, and ‘ what if this were possible’ and as I  began to question my thinking I began to free myself from limitations. I freed up my thinking, changed the assumptions I was making, AND my feelings. It works. As I transformed some things all things began to loosen and transform.

If a person could think and feel positive and happy most of the time, or even all of the time, why would a person ever chose not to? Your beliefs will come up as you answer this one. Keep in mind your reasons are you past habits of thinking. They are not necessarily true or not true they are only reasons.

Why choose to think something would be too hard to ever do? Sure, you may want to be realistic, but anything is actually possible. Why would you ever choose to make something more difficult for yourself? I don’t know but I have done it. Once I began to realize this I stopped doing it as much and began to let it go.

Why ever choose to limit oneself? I mean, really, why? Your answers will be very revealing. Again, none of them are gospel which just act as they are because we have thought them for so long. This is the tough part realizing our beliefs aren’t all that important. The serve us in many different ways. How do they serve you?

If Your Want Your Life To Change You Must Change Some Things

If they aren’t serving you very well, if your life isn’t better, if you don’t think and feel better and are able to be, do and have more as a result of your beliefs then perhaps it is time to get some new ones. It is time to develop some new positive, powerful, productive beliefs that serve you well.

It occurred to me that sometimes my ongoing assessments I had been making, while moving through life, at first were skewed towards the negative, thereby contributing to my less than glorious feelings. Once I noticed this I was then free to choose what to do about it.

I began to examine these, and ask myself whether I really wanted to think that way. As I questioned my own thinking I began to get free. I experienced a major shift in how I felt and what I thought. I went from feeling as if something was not possible and unlikely to absolutely positive and within my control.

Sometimes our feelings are subtle. The signals aren’t like a nine point fire alarm going off. They are simple, perhaps nagging or annoying but they still contribute to a less than glorious stance overall. Once I asked myself, why I would ever choose to believe that, I began to lighten up and free up.

At Each Moment You Can Choose Misery Or Bliss

At any given moment we are either thinking positive or negative. We are either thinking I can or I can’t. Whenever you discover yourself thinking negative or I can’t is an opportunity to explore why not. Then explore, investigate and challenge the reasons you get back as replies to your questions.

Keep in mind we are conditioned to answer a why question with a because answer. We provide reasons and excuses. These ‘reasons’ are precisely what you want to challenge and counter. There are precisely what you want to change from less than glorious to positive and glorious thinking.

WHY would you ever choose to think that, feel that or be that? You get an answer ask the same question. Chase your thinking down the rabbit hole. What you will ultimately discover is very rarely, VERY RARELY, will you ever have a good reason to limit yourself in any way.

Ford said, ‘if you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right’. You will truly discover this as you explore going beyond anything that is a limitation for you. Keep this important point in mind.

It Is Always Up To You 

Whatever stops you, limits you, prevents you from being your true positive self, is only a thought. A mental packet of energy… thought over and over and over again. A thought habit otherwise known as a belief. An illusion. Never let a thought stop you from ultimate good.

Yes, let a thought stop you from harm of self or others. Examine your thoughts, go beyond them. Go beyond limitations and into freedom. Discover how incredible you are. Bask in that for awhile. Enjoy the richness of others and the world and recognize it as a marvelous, wonderful place to delight! Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Have a great day!

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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

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Successful People Know Why You Need To Read And Write. Do You?

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“What is one of the best practices you can engage in? Reading. You would think everyone does it but the numbers of people who actually read to improve themselves is unbelievably low by comparison. The estimate is fewer than 10% read past the first chapter of a book. Some never even pick one up.

Would it be better to read a short 300 word paragraph than nothing at all? It might be. To read anything positive and motivational even if it is only a sentence a day is better than nothing. If you can do more than that it is better. Time spent in reading positive material is important. Time spent. Not just the reading.

Just as writing by hand is far superior to typing on a keyboard. When you write you make numerous neural connections, thousands. When you type you make 8 repetitive movements. Handwriting is called brain writing for a reason. It makes you smarter and helps you retain more when you write.

So read and take notes on what you read. Then re-read what you read. Re-read what you wrote. Re-write what you wrote and re-read. Study makes a difference. Repeated reading and study is of great value. When you read and then go back later you will notice things you hadn’t previously.

You may make new connections with the material for years by re-reading. Learning each time something new. When you re-visit your notes and re-write or re-word them later on you learn so much more. These are good, worthwhile, health practices to help you develop, grow and evolve.

I write long posts instead of 300 words because if you can’t take 5 minutes to sit and read and get your best mind on in the morning you are already screwed. I do it to detain you and get you to think. I do it for you to start your day with some inspirational material.

I write so you can take some time to think about things that are important and can make a difference in your life. I write so you can sit and reflect, perhaps reflect on it all through the day. I write to give you something to eat, food for thought, and to digest.

If you need and get all your inspiration in an infographic or a sound byte you may be beyond hope. Not really, but heck, slow down. Stop perusing FB for bad news and disturbing pictures. Instead read my blog or something else that inspires you and points you in a positive and useful direction.

Fill your mind with good ideas, good news, to begin your day right. That is why my posts are longer. To hold you for a bit. To keep your attention on one topic for a few minutes. To end the fast edits, and quick bits that hammer us on TV, radio and the internet. To give you a pause and a rest from pop ups and flashing ads.

This is why I make them longer. SO you have to rest a moment before moving on. If you can’t read at least a page of positive material in the morning, wow, you need to re-evaluate your life. You should read for a few pages, five or more minutes. Heck choose positive material to read with your coffee instead of newspaper.

The more time you read positive material for yourself the better. Some people make a practice of reading the same chapter of Napoleon Hill everyday for a month, whether they feel like it or not. That is an excellent practice.

Repetition is the mother of skill. Repeat reading, in that fashion, is bound to help you to discover things and make deeper connections than reading only once or twice. It will also become much more memorable and immediate. The understanding you gain from such practice is valuable, perhaps priceless.

Read, fill your mind with positive, inspiring thoughts when you wake up. Start and end your day right. Celebrate what you are grateful for at the very same time. Let your first and last daily thoughts be glad ones. Your life will become so much more magical and delightful as you do. Read and enjoy! Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes

Make marvelous the day!

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