Tag Archives: Beliefs

Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Creating The Future, Energy, Focus, Intentional Thinking, Mental Movie Theater, Positive Affirmations, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Talk, Visualization

Stop Spinning Your Wheels! Do This & Powerfully Change Your Life!

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“Why do we believe as we do? Why do we believe what others have told us? Why don’t we become aware of being great? Why not consider yourself a powerful creator? Why not realize fully your potential for health, wealth and well-being?

Why not become all the attributes you admire? Why not have everything you want? It is just as easy to have all these qualities as it is to have their opposites.

Realize it is just as easy to be rich as it is poor. It is just as easy to be positive as it is to be negative. So how come you aren’t already? The answer most likely is you don’t believe it to be the case. You simply don’t believe these things, yet.

You have been told it is difficult, that it is hard work and that few succeed. You may have been told you don’t deserve it or that only a few do. Whatever you have been told shapes your perceptions of the world.

Beliefs Are Thoughts We Repeatedly Think

Beliefs are thoughts we repeatedly think. Much of what we believe came from other people growing up. It came from our parents, educators and peers. Most of our beliefs aren’t actually our own because they came from elsewhere.

What you believe is what you will see. What you hold in your mind is what you hold in your hand. What you focus on you become and you get. SO – WHY continue to believe things others told you? Why live the way they think you should?

Don’t you think it is time YOU decide which beliefs you want to have? Choose those that serve you positively and powerfully and drop the limiting ones like dead wait.  Let go of the limiting beliefs and chose new powerful ones that get you what you want and where you want to go.

Get free of limitations and move into a wonderful new way of being and experiencing life whereby you make happen what you want to have happen.

It Is Just As Easy To Be Positive As Negative

It is just as easy to be positive as negative. It is just as easy to be rich as it is to be poor. If ever you are going to make a positive change for yourself it would seem this is one you should absolutely make. So what stops you? Careful now, your answer is from that set of beliefs you already adopted.

If you give an excuse or a reason as to why you can’t you have already decided that you won’t. You have to turn from the old limiting beliefs and choose new ones. You need to drop the old ones and chose new ones!

Then repeat the new ones over and over with enthusiasm. Use great feeling and emotion until these become your new beliefs. As you do this you will get the results your want. Once you believe the new beliefs you will begin to make your desires and dreams come true. You will transform your life.

If you don’t do it your not likely to get any of the results you claim to want. Make it a point to do it until you succeed. This is the attitude you need to have!

Stop Focusing On What Is Wrong

You don’t need to go into your mind and analyze what is wrong. You don’t need to sift through your history of crap to try to feel better. You may have been told that you need to but you don’t. You will find plenty to feel poorly about because like attracts like.

Once you go looking for what is wrong it is just like digging a hole. You always find more dirt. It is only a another belief anyway that mucking around would be useful.

Stop focusing on what is wrong and why it is that way. Let it all go. You never change your beliefs by examining the old or by fighting them. ‘You don’t put new wine into old wineskins’. You just drop the old and walk away. You resolve to head in a new direction.

Shed the old limiting beliefs. Allow them to drop. Let them go. Turn your attention to something nicer, better, more powerful and more positive. Stop focusing on what you don’t want and don’t like and begin focus on what you do want and do like.

Ignore any call from the old beliefs. Simply do not answer. They are like cat calls as you walk by. Ignore them. Look to those things that are so wonderful that they capture your attention completely. Become captivated with being the new you.

You don’t need to fight anything, because what you fight and resist persists. You cause it to become stronger and bigger by trying to eliminate it. What you put energy into grows.

Start Focusing On What Is Right

What is ABSOLUTELY needed is to go looking around for all that is right with you. Everything about you that works perfectly. Find everything that is positive and powerful. Whatever it is, however small it may be, look for it. Remember, like will find like.

Look for all the good stuff. Your, talents, abilities, qualities, times you helped another person or an animal. ANYTHING. Keep looking. Value all that is wonderful about you. Find these, appreciate these, value these, focus on these. Do this again and again over and over. What you focus on is what you get and become.

Imagine yourself as the powerful creator you truly are. The fact is you have been creating everything, already, all along. It is time to own up and face that you are already 100% responsible for what you have or don’t have in life. No excuses, no blaming.  That is the old way.

Perhaps, up until this moment you have been creating what you didn’t want. STOP IT! Turn away from the old way. Use good taste and create what you DO want instead. Now is the time.

Imagine Everything As You Want It To Be

In the mental movie theater of your mind see yourself and the life as you want it. Imagine it fully, vividly as though you are already living it. Make it so wonderful nothing could distract you. See, hear and really feel what it is like to be living in this way. Feel what it is like to already be and have that. It is now already yours.

This is a process. It takes some time.  Be patient.  You will bring it about if you stay with it. Be positive create what you want. Use your mental movies, your self talk and your feelings to guide you.

You have been using affirmations all along too. You have been asserting how things are in your world. Yes, things may have been less than glorious and by your statements and attention you have been affirming this. You have been creating what you did not want too! Okay, that was how you did things in the past.

Decide NOW to turn around and create only what you do want. Only speak what you DO want. Only notice what you do want. Evidence will follow in time. It does not precede. People use excuses such as ‘I’ll believe it when I see it’. They want the evidence first.

IT does not work this way. Believe it and you will eventually see it. What we hold in our head we will someday hold in our hand.

As you change your limiting borrowed beliefs into powerful, positive, personal ones you will begin to see the changes take place. It starts inside, it starts with a thought, it begins with what we believe. What we think about we bring about! Create all the goodness and all the wonderful things you desire. Begin today!” Rex Sikes

Live more fully today!

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so.

PSS  A great practice is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  COMING VERY SOON –  Daily Inspiration And Gratitude’s new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this and new content will be at new site. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. You will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. Please stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

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Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Focus, Intentional Thinking, Law Of Attraction, Personal Development, Positive Affirmations, Positive Thinking, Self Improvement

11 Powerful Principles To Transform Your Life

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“I promised you more on beliefs how we have been conditioned in limiting ways. More will come. But I thought I would provide you a brief, to the point interlude. I think together these thoughts say it all.

Take them to heart. They are easy to remember. I put lots of them together for that very reason. Enjoy them, remember them, keep them in mind.  Use these to transform your thinking and your life.

Direct and run your mind.  Don’t let your mind run you.

The mind is your slave. You are not the mind’s slave. Unless you allow yourself to be.

Focus on doubt you will  fail. Focus on success you will succeed.

Think negative and you will get negative results. Think positive and you will get positive results.

Like attracts like.  Birds of a feather flock together. Whatever you focus on you will get more of the same.

You get what you think about. You get what you focus on good or bad.

If you can hold it in your head you will some day hold it in your hand

You become what you think about. Earl Nightengale

If you can conceive it and believe it you can achieve it. Napoleon Hill

If you think you can or you think you can’t you are right. Henry Ford

Everything can be taken from a person but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances., to chose one’s way. Victor Frankl

What you fill your mind with determines what you can and cannot do. Fill it always with the best. Think like a champion and you will live like a champion. Live like a champion and you will be unstoppable!” Rex Sikes

Live passionately and enjoy!

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Beliefs, Focus, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Intentional Thinking, Law Of Attraction, Living In The Moment, Patience, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Self Improvement

Do You Know What The Greatest Deception Is?

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“Have you ever considered the impact on you messages from outside of you have? How you have been shaped and molded by those around you from birth until today? We are bombarded every second with messages from others.

Parents, friends and advertisers put out messages in all shapes and sizes in all forms and media. Countless times each day, from when we get up until we go to sleep there is an endless stream. It never ceases. These messages are part of our lifestyle as much as air and water.

We were raised to plan for a rainy day. To be careful, to save and to not put all our eggs in one basket. Some of us were taught to have fall back plans in case our original goals met with failure. We were told our dreams were unrealistic. We were told to try it for a while and if it doesn’t’t work out do something else.

You Have Believed What You Have Been Told

Many were told to get ‘a real job’, ‘a decent job’ and to settle for that. Stop being fanciful. Stop being a dreamer. No one can make money that way. You must work to get ahead. Be happy with what you have. You are too young or too old to do what you want. You don’t have what it takes mentally, physically or emotionally.

Be careful. Take it easy. Watch out for strange men. . It is a hard, cruel world. You name it we received endless messages, repeated again and again, from loving, caring, well meaning people who tried to keep us safe and sound. They loved us and didn’t want to see us hurt. Other messages came from teachers, adults, authority figures, governments, peers and the media and still do.

These messages were (and are) that we aren’t enough; we look funny with funny hair;  we need deodorant because we smell; our teeth aren’t right; we are out of step, fashion and style. We don’t drive the right car; we love or hate the right or wrong people.

Limiting Messages Come From Everywhere

There ought to be a law about;  you need to be a good patriot. Follow the rules; don’t make waves. You will never amount to anything. If you don’t have what celebrities have (or your neighbors) you are nothing. We have been told again and again that we need something more to complete us because we just ain’t enough.

At some point you encountered Positive Thinking or  the Law Of Attraction and you are told that many of the messages you have been getting for all of your life may not be accurate. You are told to ignore, drop or change those prior messages because that is not the real you. You are told things now that you may not even accept.

You are wonderful, deserving, abundant, talented, healthy, and you have access to all good things. You can do it if you think you can. Anything is possible! If you can conceive it and believe it you can achieve it. You are told you are worthy and wonderful, and to have faith in yourself. You can be, do and have anything you want!

Anything Worth Doing Is Worth Doing Poorly At First

These messages encourage you to find your abilities, strengths, resources and talents; to look within yourself to get over past hardship and disappointment and to enjoy an incredible present while creating a marvelous future. These messages say you can do it!

Your mind, already conditioned with habitual fears, stories, doubts, reasons, excuses, blames and all those prior messages from others, responds the way it was conditioned to. It doubts it, fears it, it is skeptical, it denies and all the rest.

You attempt positive thinking and up comes that old conditioning. You encounter resistance. You think it is harder than you anticipated. Perhaps, you fall back into the old way of thinking and abandon the new thoughts altogether. Many do. You wouldn’t be the first. If you stick with it you will join the elite club of those few who are able to transform their lives.

Anything Worth Doing Requires Effort And Patience

Replacing an old habit with a new habit does require effort. If you learned something one way and now you need to learn a new way it can seem difficult but it is very do-able. It is absolutely possible. You train your mind the same way you train a dog. You use patience, kindness, firmness and reward. You must keep at it if you want to succeed.

Consider that anything worth doing requires effort. Anything truly worth doing and getting good at is worth doing poorly at first. Think of anything you have ever gotten really good at; a hobby, a sport, some talent you now have that you didn’t at one time. You weren’t as good when you started as you are today, are you?

It took time and effort and patience to develop your skills and abilities. You may have even considered quitting at one time. Today, you are able to do something you weren’t at first and you are glad you have this talent in your life. It enriches you.

The same is true about changing your thoughts from those that limit you to those that encourage, enable and move you forward. It can be tough. You may feel like you want to quit. If you persist you will get much better. Ultimately, you will be glad you spent the energy because thinking positively enriches you.

If You Think You Can Or You Think You Can’t You Are Right

Keep at it. Don’t quit. Fill your mind with positivity. Do what it takes to get better. Make it a habit and it will serve you faithfully. Be patient and kind and gentle. Celebrate and be glad because what is the alternative?

The alternative is to do what you did previously. Do you really want to continue to live that way? If it is great, by all means continue. If it not as great as you want it to be, then there is an alternative that helps you get what you want to get. Focus on being more positive and you will be more positive as you put energy into it.

The greatest deception is that YOU can’t. The greatest deception is that you are limited! It is a lie. Stop believing it. You absolutely can be and do and have anything you want in life when you learn how! The greatest deception is that YOU aren’t enough. Stop believing the lie and discover what is possible for you!

The greatest deception is that YOU have accepted limiting things about yourself that you unwittingly adopted from others. The deceit is you are living from their beliefs not your own. You are traveling the world using someone else’s road map. Isn’t it time you start thinking for yourself? You are not limited unless YOU accept you are!

Stop Believing The Lies Start Believing The Truth

Your life can completely and most wonderfully continue to change for the better. As wise people have pointed out, happiness is not a destination but a journey. Now is the only time we have. The past is gone the future is yet to arrive. Live well now and enjoy the present and tomorrow will be taken care of too!

I’ll share more about these limiting messages and beliefs and what we can do to live powerfully in the next blog post. Meanwhile, do it! Think positive. Be optimistic. Live with gratitude and in celebration. Have fun, delight, put a smile on your face and on others. Enjoy the present moment and the world around you. Love yourself and believe in you. You will be surprised what you find!!” Rex Sikes

PS YOU may know someone who could really benefit from hearing this message. Feel free to share this with them via social media or email. Buttons below make it easy for you to do so. If you benefit from these words please help someone else benefit too.

PSS I have discussed how to make changes more easily using questions throughout these blog posts. You can search by topic and find some. A great thing to do is read the posts daily and then go back and re-read from time to time. You will discover things you missed the first few readings. Try it, you will be surprised.

Today is a new beginning!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others.

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Confidence, Creating The Future, Definite Chief Purpose, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Goals, Intentional Thinking, Overcoming Difficulty, Patience, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Success

What You Do While Waiting To Succeed Is Critical!

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“Have you ever planted a garden? Have you ever tended to living, growing plants? As a child in school or as an adult did you help grow anything? Did you germinate seeds? Do you remember the process? Do you recall the time it took? You had to wait, didn’t you? Whether you liked it or not you had to wait.

People are in a hurry. They want everything fast and they want it yesterday. Well, some things just take time.  For everything there is as season. You just have to endure winter when it is upon you. It still takes the same amount of time whether you like it or not.

Patience Is How You Wait When You Have To Wait

How you go through it though makes the difference. Summer is shorter typically because we enjoy it more. Most of us. If we enjoy something time seems to go by quickly. Too quick. The key to being patient, when you have to, is HOW you spend your time.

If you are having fun and enjoying it will go by quickly. If you are counting the days and comparing the distance between now and then it will seem to take forever. Waiting is completely dependent on you and how you wait. If you are desperate it sucks. If you are fulfilled while you wait it is a breeze.

Growing up as an actor in Hollywood I discovered everyone wants to ‘break through’ to ‘hit it’ to become an ‘overnight sensation’ this moment. Especially teens and twenty somethings. At that age we want it all!  In the film business, most everyone comes to realize, an overnight success takes between 10 and 15 years.

You Cannot Rush It You Cannot Push A Rope

It is not just a saying. It is a reality. Few pop. Most take years and years. Exceptions are child stars. Look at anyone’s credits on imdb and you will see most started with uncredited roles or one liners and worked hard at it, for years, before you or I ever heard of them. They put in years worth of work before anyone noticed. During that time countless thousands of others gave up.

Those who keep at it usually have success of some kind. Those who quit, well, they quit. If you stop and give up, then you stopped. If you keep going you can prevail. Being patient doesn’t mean you don’t do anything while waiting it means you keep moving forward and keep the faith. What you think and do while you wait is critical!

You have to believe in yourself and what you want. You have to keep faith in your ability to accomplish what you set out to do.  You have to know in your heart that you will make it happen in spite of the odds and the time it takes. You have to know that you can do it and will do it!

Don’t Give Up If You Want To Succeed Keep At It

There will be obstacles, set backs and temporary defeat but if you keep at it you can accomplish it. You can and you will!

Did you know that most successful people nearly gave up just prior to gaining their success? Did you know that prior to ‘popping’ most experienced their biggest ‘failures’?  They were nearly crushed and threw in the towel. Those who did not went on to success.

Did you know the first million seems the toughest to make? Do you know Researchers like Napoleon Hill, going back over 100 years ago discovered this and it remains true today. It always seems darkest right before the dawn. Out of chaos and calamity stars are born!

Stay Focused Stay Purposed Stay Passionate And Have Fun

Any worthy purpose takes time to come into being. Be absolutely clear on what you want and you absolutely want it no matter what. If you believe in yourself that you can make it happen then you can find legitimate means to bring it to pass. Stay focused! Stay purposed! Stay Passionate!

When you plant seeds they germinate. The seed must crack open and send out shoots into prepared soil where it can grow in the cover of darkness for however long it takes. It takes time and we can’t see it. We have to believe all is well and make sure it gets nourished. Then one day it breaks forth from the ground a tiny plant.

With continued nourishment it can continue to grow. Depending on what you planted it could be a flower, a food, or a giant tree. It all takes times. It takes whatever time it takes. Ultimately, it produces more seeds and the cycle continues. All the while we wait patiently there is activity. Their is growth and development.

Keep The Faith You Will Succeed 

Patience is a quality you have. It is HOW you wait. It means expect to win while you wait. It means do whatever is necessary knowing your efforts will pay off even if you can’t see the results today. Stay steady and stay consistent. Step by step you get there. Persist!

It means you can’t hurry or rush it. Take steps each day and nourish your success. Stick with it and you will make progress. What you planted you will one day reap. Don’t abandon your positive garden! How you wait is important! Affirm, acknowledge, stay positive.

Focus on the end result. You can glance at present circumstances or difficulty as you do your dash board indicators, while driving, but keep you eyes on the road ahead and keep faith in your heart. You may need to adjust your plans or take detours occasionally but keep on going. Know your destination and keep traveling to get there. You will. Be patient” Rex Sikes

Have a triumphant day!

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*Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.

HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Attitude, Blessings, Celebration, Creating The Future, Directed Questions™, Emotions, Faith, Focus, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Intentional Thinking, Laughter, Persistence, Positive Affirmations, Positive Thinking, Relaxation, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Self Talk, Smiling

Are You Ready To Transform Your Ho Hum Life Into A More Worthwhile, Successful, Positive One?

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Want To Change Your Life-

“Today, let’s keep it very simple and very brief. Let’s nutshell it all. Do you want your life to improve for the better? Do you want more happiness, success, love, fun, wealth, better health and well-being?

Do you want to live without worry, fear, and doubt? Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be filled with joy and be at peace too? All these and more can be yours. It is simple.

Feel Wonderful

Focus on the best feelings you have and make it a point to have more of them. It is not that you can’t have great feelings readily available it’s that you don’t think it is possible for you. It is!

That is the thinking you must overcome. It is possible! You can do it! You deserve to do it. You won’t, though, if you don’t believe you can or if you won’t do what it takes. Believe in yourself. Have faith!

Fill your mind and your time with the best thoughts and the most wonderful feelings you are able. If you are down low it isn’t necessary that you become over joyed. It is alright if you move from down to okay. You climb a ladder one rung at a time. Move along!

Think in terms of moving in a direction. You may start off slow and small but you speed up and make improvements along the way.

Think Positive Thoughts Speak Positive Words

Celebrate, be grateful. Live with appreciation for anything and everything. Nothing is too small nor too large to feel gratitude for. Nothing is too negative to not find some aspect to be thankful for.

Learn to look for the silver linings hidden in the dark clouds. The more you are filled with genuine thanks for everything the quicker your life transforms. Count your blessings! Feel the feelings!

Only you can do this for yourself. No one can do it for you. The more you focus on feeling wonderful the more wonderful you will eventually feel. What you think about you bring about!

Do not seek happiness and complain you don’t have it. Focus on and notice the distance decreasing not how far you must travel. Learn to manage your mindset and expectations.

Stay focused on feeling better bit bit, however small that bit may be. Step by step you will make your way. Be gentle and encouraging of yourself as you journey. Keep your talk and self-talk positive.

Live Love Laugh Celebrate

Love yourself. Accept yourself even if you don’t feel like it. Respect yourself and speak well of yourself. Think the best. Speak to yourself nicely.

Love yourself as if you are a small child learning the way for the very first time. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt. Be gentle, nudge yourself along. No one is perfect when first learning to do new things.

Smile more. Laugh! Skip, sing, dance and move. Go for walks. Spend some time out doors sitting quietly enjoying nature. Walk barefoot, ground yourself. Relax, meditate take time for yourself. Have a bath and make yourself comfortable.  Enjoy pleasant simple activities.

You eat an elephant bite by bite. No reason to bite off more than you can chew. Take it easy. Have faith. Know that if you do even just a little bit each day, that is more than you might have done and be happy. A little bit each day adds up. You will surprise yourself soon.

Keep Doing It Don’t Stop

Listen to motivational and inspirational audio. Read positive material each day. Seek out positive and productive people to spend time with. Attend positive events and seminars if you are able.

Look for the positive in all circumstances, events and people. Keep focused on what you can do. Celebrate and feel the very best. You can do this bit by bit. Just keep at it. Keep doing these things.

Soon you will be more positive than negative. Soon you will feel better and better. You will become what you think about most often and the results you get will reflect that. You will live with more joy and delight than you can presently imagine! Don’t wait. Transform your life into something amazing. Begin today!” Rex Sikes

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HEADS UP!!!  Soon Daily Inspiration And Gratitude will have a new home.  A new URL, a new look and feel. All this content and new content will be delivered there. Some of you get this blog emailed to you,

I don’t know whether that will continue or not. I do know you will be able to subscribe to the blog and my new newsletter. I hope you will stay with us. I’d hate to lose you or have you miss any blog you want to receive. So will you stay with me?  I sure want you to. I’ll let you know when the change is taking place.

Make today count!

Enjoy what is glorious about you today!

Subscribe and Follow Daily Inspiration and Gratitude!  Visit often. Feel free to comment. If you think others would benefit please share this blog with others

Acceptance, Attitude, Blessings, Creating The Future, Focus, Intentional Thinking, Responsibility, Trust, Unlimited Power

He Turned His Back On The Lions. Could You?

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“Can you imagine turning your back on the lions if you were stuck in a cage with them? That is what he did. Before we get to that I want to remind you of an ancient piece of wisdom you might like to consider and embrace.

There’s an ancient story to illustrate the way you can remain centered and not get hooked.  In order to get unhooked and not buy into drama you have to develop another attitude, a different mindset. Once this mindset is in place all aspects of your world become different. Everything is enhanced.

There was a man whose horse ran away. The villagers exclaimed what a misfortune this was. The man replied, ‘maybe’.  A day or two later the horse returned bringing with it three more horses. The town people exclaimed, ‘you are lucky how fortunate to have more’. The man replied again only with ‘maybe’.

A day or two later his son was riding one of the new horses  and was thrown breaking his leg. The town people exclaimed what a tragedy this was and again offered him sympathy. The man replied, ‘maybe’.

The next day war broke out and all able bodied men were conscripted. The military officials seeing the condition of the man’s son passed him by. The towns people all exclaimed how lucky he was because now his son would face battle. He and his son had been spared.  The man still replied, ‘maybe’.

We only see part of the picture at any time. The man knew anything is possible. The town’s people only saw a portion and reacted. We can let go of the outcome and respond as the man did if we condition ourselves to understand this. We only see a partial bit of any picture.

Anything is possible. It could be a blessing or a curse.  It could be true, as they say, or perhaps it could be otherwise. Time would tell. We don’t have to react we can respond.

It was stated this way in the Bible, ‘we see through a glass dimly’. We can’t see everything. We can’t possibly know everything. Yet, we act as if we do and that gets us in trouble. We have to let go, suspend our judgement. This present situation could be horrible or it could be the best thing that ever happened. We don’t know yet.

Often people look back years after hardship and they can trace the path from then to now. From this vantage point, years later, frequently they point to a cataclysmic event and say ,’that was the turning point for me. Had that not happened I wouldn’t be here now’, or ‘I wouldn’t be as successful as I am. It was the best thing that ever happened to me.’

Years later we see what we didn’t see it going through it. At the time of the event It doesn’t occur to us that this may be an incredible opportunity disguised as a disaster. Nor do we see it could be a legitimate disaster within which there is the seed of an opportunity.

We don’t know. Maybe we should suspend judgement. The verdict is not in yet and we should wait and see.

The old man knew you can label any situation however you want to label it and that does not make it so. He didn’t judge it so he didn’t get caught up by it.

He didn’t get hooked into it as the others did.They lived one moment happy and the next upset. Then happy then upset. They were like corks adrift on a sea.

The old man was steady whatever came his way he took it in stride. He was the one in charge. The world still occurred around him and influenced he and his son but he chose how he would respond to his circumstance. The old man was wise. You and I can be too.

If you make a mistake on your journey and you do something that disappoints you, or you are not proud of, acknowledge it. Recognize it. Determine not to do it in the future and choose what and how you want to respond instead.

Focus on what you want. Do not what you don’t want. Praise yourself, be grateful for the awareness and the opportunity to change it. Make restitution with yourself and whomever else may be party to it.

Do the best you have with what you have at the time.  If you make a mistake, if you fall, correct it, get up and move forward. Let go of the past. Extract the important lesson to learn. Don’t blame yourself or others or make excuses. Accept it and move forward.

You can evolve when you learn from mistakes and failures. You have the opportunity to clarify what you want when smacked in the face with what you don’t want. All can benefit you in profound ways. So fill yourself with gratitude and celebration.

Condition your mind. What you focus on you become. Develop the belief that you are the type of person who can handle anything in positive ways. If you believe it you can become that person. If you believe you can respond instead of react then you will develop the ability.

Your attitude determines your altitude! Your mindset, what you believe and expect of yourself, determines what results you are able to create or get back.

Focus on living a positive life. Focus on learning to respond. Think ‘this or something better is coming to me’.

There is the biblical story of Daniel and the lions. Daniel was thrown into a den of lions. Once inside he turned his back on the lions and trusted the lord.

What a poignant teaching example.Trust! Have faith! He turned his back on and ignored his troubles. He didn’t look at them. He looked elsewhere. He trusted.

He didn’t focus on his worry, fear, or doubt, he looked away. He turned away from what he didn’t want and towards what he wanted. He let go of the problem and had faith that he would be okay.

Of course, he didn’t know he would be okay. It took faith. It took courage. It took trust that there was something better. It took the conviction that these circumstances would not defeat him.

Whether you take the story literally or as a metaphor there is great value in it. He faced his problems and then turned from his problems to the solution. He had faith that the outcome would be positive. What a great example!

At this time, you could be enduring your own personal “den of lions”. The key is not to put your focus on your current situation but trust that it will all work out. Put your focus on what you want, the solution, and not on the problem. Create and make happen what you want to make happen. Don’t succumb to the circumstances.

A couple of my favorite Bible verse are: ‘all things work together for good.’ There are many others in all ancient texts I like. I keep them in mind during trying times. Another one, I remind myself of, again and again, is ‘no weapon formed against me shall prosper’.

Expect the best!

I like those two verses because they reminds me I can move through this world, and any situation, with confidence things will always turn out right no matter what. I will always land on my feet. Everything will work out in the end.

There may be an incredible hardship you face right now but ultimately, things will turn out for the best in the long run. They always seem to. Keep it in mind. Learn to respond as the old man. Trust, as Daniel did.

When I remember this I can let things go. I move forward and surprise myself with my ‘enlightened’ responses. When I forget it I get hooked hard. Usually because a big part of me knows I don’t have to be hooked but I go ahead and get hooked anyway. Silly, right?

We are not perfect and shouldn’t hope to be. We are perfectly imperfect. We are living beings we aren’t carved from stone. We live, we change, we grow, we adapt and we don’t.

Sometimes we remain stuck for awhile. Sometimes we walk backwards, but usually for not very far. At times we walk in the light other times we search in darkness. We will make mistakes.

We will disappoint ourselves and others. Make good when we do. Never ignore that. Do what is right by you and by them. Always have faith in a better day. The sun rises tomorrow. It becomes a new day.

Take 100% responsibility for creating all circumstances. Trust that things will work out. Expect them to. Focus on what you want. Make your dreams come true because only you can. Believe it. What you think about the most you become.

Affirm it. Live It! These blog pages give you the keys how to do this. You can develop the champion mindset. Use these principles and methods to evolve your life into something beyond wonderful! You can live, laugh, love! Celebrate!” Rex Sikes

Delight in this day!

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The Secret To Making The Changes You Need To

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there is nothing impossible

“Are you aware that making personal change is quite simple and easy? It really is.  It just doesn’t seem that way and that is because you don’t think or believe it is. It really is! It is true!

Most people don’t have to be unhappy, lonely, unsuccessful, broke, in poorer health, they just think they do. They don’t. You don’t! There is a way that you can be, do and have everything you want

Change can be quite easy. People can change.You can be whatever you want to be, do and have whatever you want in life. You can make it happen more easily than you may have ever imagined. You can end bad unwanted habits and create new better ones..

The caveat is this:

It Isn’t Seeing Is Believing It’s Believing Is Seeing

HOW we think about something makes it true for us. Our beliefs actually make it so. The results we get or don’t get are directly related to what we think and believe inside our head first.

I know plenty of people will object to this concept. It will get some people hot as they argue for objective reality imposing on us. These arguments or discussions have been around for a long time.

From, ‘I think therefore I am’, to ‘If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound?’ People will find excuses to defend what they already believe rather than trying on new beliefs that serve them better.

There is enough research that anyone can find. I am not going to debate it here.That is not a fruitful use of mine or your time. I ask you to consider this. What if everything you knew were wrong? What would life be life? It surely would be different, how?

I ask this because it isn’t about making assertions it is about becoming open. It is about becoming curious and being able to entertain concepts rather than dismiss them because we disagree with them. There is the Zen story about the master who sent the seeker away because his tea cup was already full.

You Cannot Pour More Tea Into A Full Cup

You must first empty the cup, the master pointed out, then new tea can be poured in. We all have full, completely filled, heads. We have all the assumptions, reasons, excuses, why we are who we are and do and have what we do and have.

We need to let these go. We need to suspend our beliefs, at least momentarily, to even be able to entertain new ideas or new beliefs. We need to be open, empty and available to a new way of thinking and being in order to even attempt it. When the student is ready the teacher appears. Then new tea can be given. Then, life can change!

It is asking better questions that lead us to more useful outcomes. It is not declaring something wrong before trying it out. Curiosity and the willingness to explore opens us up to the possibility of adventure. Dismissal out of hand, too quick, simply shuts everything down. Either we expand, contract or remain the same.

The Flower Is Either Growing Or It Is Dying

Can you be open? It is easy to be open. It just doesn’t seem that way.

Whatever you declare makes it so. You are doing it right now as you read. You either agree or you don’t. You may be one of those who suspend judgement until more data becomes available but more probably you are either agreeing or disagreeing with each statement How open and available are you to entertain new ideas?

We can be, do and have anything in life if we want it. Would you agree? If yes, why? If not, why not? Your answers reveal your beliefs. Either you believe you can or you believe you can’t. You will have reasons why you believe either way. These beliefs and reasons determine the results you get or don’t get.

You Can Be, Do And Have Anything You Want

We can be, do and have anything in life if we want it. Yet, most people don’t come close. A few do. It seems they have unlocked the secret while the rest have not. Others believe god (or the universe) selects certain people to bless and others to fail. OR they believe some are just incredibly lucky while most are not.

People have been taught the secret for eons.  Some people figure it out by accident, which is certainly possible. However, they come to it they come to it. Once exposed to it they either apply it or not. Those who do know what happens as a result. Those who don’t never know.

Either You Believe It Is Possible For You Or You Don’t

Let me provide an example. Let’s take a plank the width of a door, in fact lets take a solid wood plank 2x the width of a door. That is probably about the width of a normal sidewalk. It’s length is 100 feet long. It is as solid as anything can be solid. 100 feet long and about 5 or 6 feet wide and strong.

I put this plank down on the ground and ask you to walk. Do you think you could? Probably, it is the same as walking on the sidewalk. Most people could do so without any thought or effort.You could walk, might even run, skip or hop your way along the board for the 100 feet. No big deal, right?

Ok so I raise it 20 feet in the air. Would you walk it?  Some would some would not. Raise this same plank 100 feet in the air would you walk it?  Fewer would walk it. If we could raise it a half a mile would you walk it? Few ever say yes. I’ve had a difficult time finding anyone to say yes, ‘I’ll gladly walk it’.  Would you?

Why, do most people opt out when it gets raised from the ground? The plank has not changed. It is the same plank people traversed easily while on the ground.  What changed is people’s thoughts about it.

They are fearful of the height. They imagine themselves falling. The higher up the fewer people willing to walk it because they get frightened. They imagine bad things in their mind. BUT Nothing has actually changed.

Our Beliefs Determine What We Will And Won’t Do

Our beliefs determine what we will and won’t even consider. You realize this right? Absolutely, nothing changed. The plank high in the air is exactly the same one easily walked on the ground. What changed was inside one’s head.

Their beliefs changed. What they imagined happening changed. How they felt as a result changed. They couldn’t imagine walking it because of what they were thinking. This meant they wouldn’t even try. If you don’t attempt it you don’t get any results at all.

It isn’t much different than being afraid of a spider. The spider is millions of times smaller than the human but some humans freeze with fear. It is what the human thinks, sees, tells oneself inside one’s head that makes the tiny spider scary.

Our Beliefs Determine What Is Easy And What Is Not

Our beliefs determine what we do AND do not do. Our beliefs determine what is and isn’t possible for us; what is difficult or easy; what takes time or no time. Whether we move forward and change easily or not has to do with our beliefs.

Does that mean if I believe I can jump over the moon I will be able to? No, it doesn’t. I honestly, don’t know if you could or not but I suspect the answer is no. I am not suggesting ‘impossible’ things. But some people think they can no more succeed than they could jump over the moon. That is sad. That is not comparing apples to apples.

Can you make a million dollars by tomorrow? Well, you could. You might. It may be rarer to do that but it could happen. Some people play the lottery and get lucky and become rich with the drop of 6 balls. So it is possible but not likely.

It isn’t about magic. It is not that you wave a wand and things happen because you believe.  It is the practical application of your positive mindset and expectations that determine how successfully you move in the world.

Could you make a million dollars?  Yes.  You certainly can if you believe you can and go after it?  Can you be happy after living a lifetime of sadness. Yes. Can change can be easier than you think it is? Yes!  Sadly, most people think it is tough and never both to change what they believe.

Your Beliefs Work For You – You Shouldn’t Be Their Servant

Why have you come to have these beliefs? Who cares? We could discuss that forever. The question is will you begin to expand your beliefs and abilities so you can live happily and be who you want to be, feel what you want to feel, do what you want to do and get what you want to have.

Don’t let your thoughts prevent you. Have the courage to challenge your thoughts. Make your mental constructs, your images and self talk your servant.  Make these work for you instead of being their servant. You can triumph and be a champion or you can be a victim or remain stuck.

Getting to where you want to get in life is just like getting anywhere in life. You have to know where you want to go, believe you can get there and then get moving. If anything comes along to interrupt or make the travel difficult, adjust your map, but keep going. Obstacles may arise. Keep going! In real life obstacles represent opportunity.

The Poor And The Powerless Fear Failure And Hardship.

Some people won’t even try because they don’t want to fail. That may be safe and assures you that nothing changes. If you don’t try you won’t fail but you also are not likely to ever succeed.

The successful and rich people don’t fear failure. They don’t even consider it an option. They know they will succeed. They know that they will learn more from attempts that don’t work out than from immediate success. They know they will succeed even when they don’t know how.

The successful understand that knowing how isn’t what you need to begin. How will become clear along the journey. They understand that they only need to determine to win and go after it and they will figure it out along the way AND make their dreams come true. They don’t let anything stop them.

They know that challenges equip them with more of what they need to triumph. Their attitude, their beliefs are different. Their mindset supports them. They are in charge. They don’t let the thought of defeat or actual defeat prevent them from making good in the end.

The Successful Know In Advance They Will Succeed

Failure nearly always precedes success. If you interview most of the self made millionaires and influential people you’ll discovered nearly all of them overcame incredible odds. For most, it was anything but easy. Yet, they prevailed. They did because of their mindset.

The people who succeed know they must continue. They are driven. They are passionate about making a difference. They believe they ultimately succeed no matter what. So they do! Attitude separates the wheat from the chaff.

Mindset determines how far you will be willing to go. ‘If you think you can or you think you can’t you are right.’ said Henry Ford. He was right.

Are you willing to suspend your doubt, your suspicion, your fear, your worries, your know it all attitude, or your ‘I don’t know enough’ attitude to allow yourself to try on some new beliefs. Can you begin to believe you can make it happen and that you can change easily?

I know there will be those who can change their beliefs as they would a spring jacket. They will move forward changing and surprising themselves and delighting along the way. They will encounter difficulty but they won’t let it stop them.

I also know there are those who will cling to what they have always believed and always known. Those will dismiss this proposal out of hand as silly or too hard or  impossible. These people will remain the same.

Decide To Be The Victor, The Champion, The Winner

Change is easier than you think it is OR it is as tough as you think it is. (I’ll continue to address this in other upcoming blogs.)

It is whatever you believe it to be. Your thoughts either move you forward toward what you want OR they stop you and hold you back. You are either the controller, the victor of your thoughts or you are the victim of your thoughts.

At any moment you can chose to be a champion if you will let yourself. Take responsibility and recognize you have a choice. You have a decision to make. Which type of person are you? Which type of person do you want to be? Which type of person will you be? It is completely up to you! Decide today!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy today. Make it exciting!

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The Number 1 Reason Therapy Sucks!

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talking about problems greatest addiction

“I might upset a lot of people with this but hang in there. Stay open as your read. You may feel a tendency to shut down and dismiss but keep an open mind. I know it can be difficult to listen (read) all the way through, especially in this day and age but give it a shot. Try it. Hear me out.

Some therapy will keep you in therapy forever because they want you to sift though all your pain, hurt, defeat, heartbreak, anger, sadness, every grievance you may have had because they believe buried deep within you are unresolved hurts and issues. You must bring them to light of day, work on them and over come them. This is very well meaning but not most effective.

This approach will keep you in therapy for a longer time. It is a ruse, a dirty trick played on you. The goal of therapy should be healing and to get out of therapy. This business model works against you since you are charged by the session the doctor makes more the less success you have. Your problems line their pockets with cash. This happens when the focus is on managing issues (in any field) instead of the resolution of issues. There may be legitimate reasons too. Not everything is cut from the same cloth.

The same applies to self help products and seminars when, after you purchase their product they continue to upsell you on why the original product didn’t work in the first place. While it can be true in therapy or with products and seminars some troubleshooting may be required none of it should make you feel inadequate about your abilities to change. You should be focused on what you can positively and proactively do to be able to live the life you want to live.

Therapy Should Search To Find Your Strong Points 

The goal should be to find solutions, resources, talents, abilities,all your strong points and to get you out of therapy. The focus in much therapy, as practiced, IS IN EXACTLY THE WRONG PLACE.  It keeps you locked into seeing a therapist.

Let me say there are scores of well intending, compassionate understanding people who value this therapeutic approach and I realize I am stepping down hard on their toes. There are many who practice and receive therapy who believe in it. Benefit can be found anywhere if you look for it.

I have the utmost respect for all these people and do not intend to cause any discomfort – other than the mental kind that comes with entertaining an opposing idea. This is a call to examine and to be open and to improve the work that good people want to accomplish. It is meant to build in a particular direction not to tear down.

I hope you understand. That said, let’s move on!

Therapy Is Supposed To Be A Healing

It is supposed to be about Healing! Einstein said, ‘We can not solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them.’

You don’t heal the wound by continuing to pick at it. You treat it and let nature heal while you move on with your life. Digging into the wound, other than to immediately clean it out and identify what needs to be done, does not help it.

Understanding one’s problems and listing reasons for being stuck may placate for awhile but it does not necessarily resolve them. This approach causes us to continue to live with issues. We explore and find the reasons we are as we are.

We determine who or what we blame for our problems. We make excuses as to why we haven’t yet moved. Instead we should take responsibility for the problem, get over it and move ahead.

Energy Flows Where Your Attention  Goes

This concept has roots in most of the major religions. Napoleon Hill and the early thought leaders of the 20th century addressed this issue well. It is popularized in Law Of Attraction (LOA) literature.

Simply put: What you focus on expands. Whatever it is, good or bad, wanted or unwanted enlarges when you pay attention to it.  It expands when we put our attention on it. This is about where and how we place our attention!  Whatever you resist, persists! What you fight fights back.

Earl Nightengale stated it. So had Buddha, and Gandhi when they said,  ‘You become what you think about.’ This is another way of saying energy flows where your attention goes. What you think about you bring about. What you hold in your head you will hold in your hand.

It is the principle of Karma. It is cyclical. You get back what you put out there. Whatever you plant you will later reap. What you attempt to fix you focus on so you get more of the problem.

The problem for people attempting to resolve their problem this way is that focusing on the problem IS THE PROBLEM!

Birds Of A Feather Flock Together

The Law Of Attraction states like attracts like. Whatever it is! Good or bad! Positive attracts positive and negative attracts negative. SO if you are stuck and you focus on why you are stuck you get more stuck. It is simple really. What you think about you bring about.

No one tells you this because we have become so entrenched in thinking this is the way it is. We have been lead by an industry into thinking that digging a hole will get us closer to the other side. It won’t! We just end up with more and more dirt.

If you focus on what you do not want you put energy into what you do not want. How do you suppose you will get what you want while you are totally focused on what you don’t want? YOU WON’T!

No one tells you this because you are their paycheck. Even if they are well intending and it isn’t about the money this philosophy will keep you stuck for a long time. This form of therapy is not the answer. Caring people can nurture and promote a problem unintentionally. They don’t mean to but they don’t know any other way.

Withdraw The Energy From The Problem

The way of change is to withdraw the energy from the problem source. Let it go. Drop it. Then direct the mind to what you want instead. Focus on what you want and it expands. If you stop feeding plants or weeds they will wither and die. STOP FEEDING YOUR PROBLEMS!!!

The reason why a lot of change work doesn’t work and why people stay stuck IS because the solution to the problem does not exist at the same level the problem was created. We have to shift, step aside, go around, move over to the positive instead of focusing on the negative.

Stop It, Drop It, Let Go And Re-Direct Your Attention To Solutions

If you want your life to change you have to change things in your life. You can’t continue to do the same things over and over again and hope for a different positive result. It won’t happen. We are our habits and if we are habitually focused on what is wrong we are not ever going to get to what is right until we change those habits.

Focus On Your Strengths; Focus On What Is Right

You don’t get stronger focusing on your weaknesses. You don’t get better developing your weaknesses. You might get to mediocre by working on what you are least good at. You become the best by focusing on and developing what you are good at.

When you focus on your strengths, what you are best at, you have an opportunity to take them to a championship level. You maximize your strengths. You accentuate your abilities. Remember, whatever you focus on expands!

Instead of looking for why and where you are broken search for why and where you are good. Look for why and where you are healthy! Look for why and where you work perfectly well. Look for your resources. Look for you positive characteristics and attributes and emphasize those.

Develop Your Skills And Abilities

Get better at these. Develop you positive thoughts and feelings and you get more of them. What you focus on expands. You become what you think about! You will feel more positive about yourself. Your confidence and your competence will grow. You’ll begin to feel better and enjoy more well-being.

Stop focusing on how you aren’t enough and begin focusing on how you are more than enough. Focus on the light and life radiating within you. Stop getting in your own way by looking for dirt and begin to look for gold. It is there within, perhaps hidden, but you will find it as you look for it.

Develop your positive thoughts and feelings, attributes and characteristics. Develop the skills and abilities you are already good at. Your confidence and well being and wonderful thoughts about yourself will grow too and soon you will discover other positive truths about you. You’ll discover glorious feelings! You will rock your world.

Praise Yourself, Celebrate and Become Filled With Gratitude

Stop blaming and criticizing yourself. Be grateful for everything you have and don’t have. Be thankful for all of your experiences good and bad, for all the wonderful and all the horrible people in your life. Celebrate, be grateful, be free.

Take responsibility for it all! Don’t be a wimp don’t make excuses just accept responsibility for it all. 100% This puts you in charge. When you take control everything changes for the positive. You begin to determine the outcomes. You decide to live as a victor, a champion, and not a victim.

If you want your life to change you must change things in your life. Change your thoughts. Stop blaming yourself, others and the world! Accept total responsibility for everything. Even if you disagree with this premise it allows you to be in charge and at cause rather that at the effect of others and circumstances.

Choose! Would you rather live from a place of compassionate, benevolent power or would you prefer to be a slave and a victim to problems? Would you rather live strong or weak? It is completely up to you and ONLY you.

Stop looking for what is wrong and for what doesn’t work and begin to look for what is right. Develop these things! As you do you will stop being weak and you will start being strong. That happens when you come into your own power. You will celebrate yourself! You will also find reasons to celebrate others.

You will be nicer, friendlier, more loving and develop better relationships when you embrace your strengths. It is a natural part of your development when you focus on the positive rather than the negative. You become kinder. You become more accepting. You learn change is easier than you originally thought!

Transform Yourself And Your Entire Life Transforms

You develop a strong sense of helpfulness and co-operation while at the same time you learn to establish boundaries. You say yes to more of what you want and no to what you don’t want. You stop wasting your time and enjoy life more.  You end victimhood and you stop being a doormat when you take charge of your life.

It is amazingly powerful! This is life transforming! You learn to shift awareness from problems to solutions. You’ll move away from the unwanted toward the wanted; away from the negative to the positive. You will develop new positive habits for staying focused in positive ways on what works, what is helpful, what you want and enjoy!

Stop! Don’t be one of these people who spend years trying to figure out what is wrong. They would be better served if they focused on developing strengths instead of discovering their weaknesses

Keep in mind the American Psychiatric (and Psychological) Associations philosophies of practices focus on the diagnosis and treatment of problems. Keep in mind psychology, just like medicine, is a practice. It is about diagnosis and repair. These practitioners are not gods, they are only expressing opinions based on their training biases and really nothing more. Actually, that is true about anyone.

If all you have is a hammer you treat everything as a nail. If the focus is on problems you’ll find problems everywhere. This mindset applies to you and me first and foremost. We must look for solutions if we want to find them.

It is accurate to say that in USA we do not promote health and prevention as much as we practice diagnosis, repair and management when necessary. We have little in the way of preventative medicine in our country but this movement has been growing slowly for decades now. Still, one can see the obvious battle between the corporate powers that be and those helping to bring about change.

Concetrate On Health And Well-Being For Yourself

Even though we don’t promote wellness as much people can find benefit anywhere and everywhere. Nothing is written in stone. We can all change regardless of what approach we take. Be positive! Be optimistic. Expect to find solutions and you can.

Perception is everything as are our expectations. People tend to rise to what is expected of them! Look to what is healthy and positive! Look into what is healthy and is positive.

Your goal is to have an incredible, loving, fun-filled, joyous successful life. Perception is everything. Orientation is everything. Framing is everything. Don’t submit to the limitations of philosophies. You deserve better.

See solutions, talents, abilities, resources. See positive potential wanting to be released. There are victors who chose to live as victims because they drank ‘the sugary drink’.  Stop it! Believe in yourself. Believe in the ease at which you can change.

Let me make this point very clear. This blog is not about criticizing the system although there is plenty that could be said. This is not meant to criticize countless numbers of helpful, beneficial practitioners of change. If you are in therapy and it is working for you celebrate and be grateful. That is what it should be doing regardless of the approach. I am all for doing what works!

My emphasis is that people put attention in the wrong place. This should be very clear. Therapy, as practiced by many, sucks because of what people focus on. The emphasis is on the problem. The same is the case for people not in therapy. They put their attention in the wrong place. This post is about where you put your attention and where to put it to get the most benefit! Please don’t miss this point.

Change work should be about healing and solutions. It could be about resources and strengths. WHETHER OR NOT someone is in therapy the point remains the same because this is really NOT about therapy! If you focus on the negative that is what you get more of. Stop focusing so much on problems. If you are going to find a therapist find one who focuses on solutions! They are out there!

I must keep reminding the reader: this point of this post is where WE place OUR attention! You must place your attention where it does the most good! Focus on the positive, your talents, your abilities, your strengths. You will find more of them when you put your attention on these! If you want your life to change you must change things you are thinking, paying attention to, and doing. You have to change some things to change your life. When you focus on developing your strengths your confidence increases as a result.

Expect Change To Be Easy And It Will Be. Perception is Everything

You can live an amazing, wonderful, joy-filled life NO MATTER WHAT. Your past doesn’t equal your future. Whatever you did or however you lived before that was then. Now is the time to make the change. Now is the time to start developing the positive habits that you will use to have the best life ever!

Live victoriously. Claim it! Live as a victor. Live and think and act and feel like a winner. You deserve to. Have a glorious life! Focus on what you want and can do. Focus on enjoying it all. Celebrate and becoming grateful for everything.

Make the changes you want to make. You can be, do and have anything you want. So do it! Be responsible for your life from this moment forward. There are more incredible and delightful moments ahead for you than you can even begin to imagine right now!” Rex Sikes

What a wonderful new day to delight in!

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Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Confidence, Decision, Focus, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Rehearsal And Practice, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Success

Forget Your Weaknesses: Develop Your Strengths!

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opportunity is missed by most - edison

“If you learned you need to get better at what you are poor at you learned wrong. If your parents or teachers or anyone told you to develop and work on your weaknesses they were incorrect. You could spend a lot of time devoted to what you aren’t good at and be wasting a lot of your time!

Stop! Make a change that will bring you better results and greater satisfaction. Work on and develop your strengths! Take what you are good at and get great at it! This makes the most sense. This will get you the best result for your efforts.

Your Strengths Give You The Edge

Take your talents to the next level and the level after that. Your strengths are what you should be furthering. Who knows how far you could go if you focused on making your best even better? 

Developing your weaknesses sounds good but if you suck at something how long will it take until you are mediocre at it? Meanwhile, the best you got is languishing. It is silly to let your best go to waste while you focus on what you are the least good at.

Remember, what you focus on expands. What you think about most you become. What you put out there comes back to you. SO why spend all your time putting energy into what you aren’t very good at?

Put Your Energy Into Where You Are Good And Excel!

Emphasize and spend time with all that is the best of you. Think about what you are good at rather than what you aren’t good at. Focus on your strengths and develop those. Your strong points give you the edge your weaknesses won’t.

If you are bad at something and you keep trying to get better at it its more apt to break your confidence and crush your spirit. Build up your wins, feel the best, and live from where you are strong.

It makes sense if you are socially inept, if you aren’t able to communicate well; if you can not look another person in the eye and talk to them than yes, you should develop your skills to be able to do so. One of the best ways you do that is to develop your confidence.

Focusing On Your Best Develops Your Confidence

How do you develop confidence? You develop your confidence by making your best better. You feel confident when you take stock of and keep in mind what you are good at; you remember your talents and abilities. Confidence comes from winning and excelling.

It is wiser to start at the top and go higher than to begin at the bottom and work your way up to the middle. Skyrocket don’t struggle.

Be confident while staying humble. Bragging isn’t real confidence it is based in fear. When you really are good you know it you don’t have to prove it.

In your career, your occupation, your job, even your school you can bet you will be rewarded with a promotion or a raise or an honorable notice for what you are best at not what you suck at. Put your best foot forward not your worst. Develop your skills and abilities. You will be glad you did!” Rex Sikes

It is your day to make what you will of it!

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Acceptance, Attitude, Beliefs, Creating The Future, Emotions, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Gratitude, Living In The Moment, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Relaxation, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Visualization

Do This: Whenever You Are Frustrated. When It Just Isn’t Happening!

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unworry more - most never happens

“Why are you frustrated? You don’t seem to be making headway fast enough? You probably hate it when someone says, ‘relax. Be patient.’ You don’t want patience right, you want your efforts to pay off now! Don’t you?

That, wanting, that desire, that insisting, THAT IS your suffering.

You are trying to push a rope. You are trying to force the process. You are trying to make water boil faster and you just can’t. Instead of relaxing and letting go you are getting hot. You do need to be patient and that makes it all the more difficult, doesn’t it?

You are split. You want it, it isn’t working. You know you shouldn’t feel this way but you do. You go back and forth, you can’t make it hurry and you are in a hurry. You are divided. Bouncing back and forth as if off walls. Guess what? You really CAN’T force it.

You do have to relax and wait. SO you might as well learn how to.

If you don’t know relaxation methods you should. Learn them when you don’t need them or when you do. Just take sometime and learn to relax, let go and enjoy life in spite of everything. Learn the value and importance of taking a break, a vacation from your woes. Listen to relaxation mp3s online or CDs. Take a class.

Go somewhere nice for a few days. Enjoy something. Actually take your mind off it. Meditate, go work out, work in the garden. Walk. But take a well needed, well deserved break. Seek to develop the abilities to accept, to let go, to relax and to be patient.

Those who are truly successful know what they can and can’t control. If they can’t control time then they use their time to feel better. The unsuccessful use their time to feel worse. Which do you want to be?

Go golfing, swimming, camping. Engage in a hobby. Have some fun. Let go. Successful people take out their yacht, their Porsche. They do anything to take a break. They aren’t going to let themselves feel frustrated when there are better feelings to enjoy!

You can be, do and have anything you want in life when you first determine what it is you want. Then you passionately let it consume you and you pursue it with persistence. You don’t quit until you have it.

You can transform yourself into a relaxed, successful person with a winning attitude and winning behaviors by beginning to imagine yourself as that kind of person, if you aren’t already.

Go back through my blog site and read and review my posts on how to become who you want to become. Learn to do what you want to be able to do. Find out how to get whatever it is you what to have.

Patience is your attitude and behavior while you wait. It is what you think and do in the meantime. It defines who you are. Patience means you are waiting for an expected outcome.

Imagine how different people were a couple centuries ago. There was no instant on anything, no high speed internet, no jet travel, no microwaves. Whatever time it took, took the time it took to complete.

People had to wait for water to boil; it took time to build a fire and warm the house. Trips took however long they took by horse, ship, and eventually by rail. To cross the ocean or the country you live in took a long time.  You couldn’t be in too much of a rush if things too weeks and months. My guess is they were qualitatively different than we are today.

For everything there is a season. Farmers planted and harvested in whatever time it took. They grew up used to waiting. Waiting was a big part of life. Mail took a long time. Communication and change was slow. There was no emergency medicine as we know it. No 911 responders.

People had a much different relationship to time. My guess is that they were less in a hurry than modern people because they grew up waiting for many things. Either you got used to it as a life style or you suffered. BUT they also didn’t have any difference to compare it to.

Those who have grown up with instant access, drive-up banking, microwaves, high speed this and that, the media and advertisers’ promise of faster, quicker, overnight, you can have it yesterday magic pills and silver bullets, get frustrated when things take time.

We think everything should be quicker, easier, take no effort, take no time AND be better. Our thoughts determine what we experience. We don’t have the same quality of patience as the people who lived long ago. We need to think the thoughts that serve us better. Our thoughts are what we can control!

That farmer, back then, planted and expected to harvest a crop. Sometimes the weather or conditions changed and crops failed, Sometime they were more bountiful but either way that farmer planted, WAITED and EXPECTED to harvest. It took all the required time it took. He had to do other things in the meantime!

Wait and see meant wait and see.

Patience requires faith. In faith you wait for what you believe will happen, what you know will happen. You wait for what you expect to happen. After all you expect the sun to come up tomorrow. It is a given. You expect the Christmas holiday madness near the end of each year. These are givens!

If you chose to take a pleasure cruise across the seas you expect to get to your destination. You don’t doubt that you will get there, although anything is possible. You have faith that you will arrive when you arrive. So you can relax and enjoy the journey.

When it comes to making our dreams come true and accomplishing our goals patience is required. We plant the seeds, we think about it day and night, we visualize, we affirm, we work our plan and we wait.

How we wait is important.  Either you are patient and expect good things or you are frustrated, tense, hurried and frazzled.

If we are patient we know it is happening. It is coming there is no question about that. It’s a given! The time doesn’t matter because we have put it into motion. We are initiators. We are creators. We make things happen. It will happen, we know it, it is just a matter of when. We have faith.

Yes, that may be tougher today because of our modern conveniences and our relationship to time but patience is still required. It is an attribute or characteristic that serves us well.

We shouldn’t be making excuses and whining and complaining and blaming others or the era we are born into. We should be cultivating winning behaviors and attitudes that make our success and happiness more likely.

You don’t cultivate new thoughts and behaviors thinking and doing the old ones repeatedly. We must change our thoughts and behaviors if we want changes in our lives. We must develop those areas that help us reliably get what we want.

We need to exercise our positivity, our faith, our patience and our persistence. We must commit to excellence.

We must wait expecting the positive outcome. We can’t dig the seeds up and check. We must not let out circumstances convince us that anything but the outcome we want, or better, is on the horizon.

If we give in to worry, doubt, fear, we undo our efforts. We get mixed results. We take a step forward and then backwards. We get caught up. Then we don’t have faith, patience or positive expectations. We are frustrated. You don’t move forward quickly if you undo each forward step you take.

We are looking at the wrong things. We are looking at results we created previously that are presently manifesting while the new results are growing in darkness. Keep your faith no matter what.

In order to get what we want we must remain laser like focused. We must rest assured. We must be convinced. We must know in our heart we have done the necessary work (when we actually have) and now it is only a matter of time. AND we continue to do whatever is necessary; we continue to have faith and wait expectantly.

How do we live in the meantime? We celebrate, we enjoy, we live in the present to the fullest. We delight and are thankful and live with true gratitude. We let every moment fill us. When there are obstacles we overcome them by utilizing our personal resourcefulness.  We have a winning attitude! We know how to relax too.

We live with passion, we live in this moment knowing good things are coming in the future. We know that what we have put in motion and what we keep in motion will be ours soon enough. We know the garden we planted in time will bloom. We nurture it along and enjoy where we are now at. This is a great way to live!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy and have fun today!

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