Category Archives: Persistence

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Perhaps The Most Important Question You Ever Ask Yourself

May 30, 2015 rexsikes 1 Comment

“As a young actor, with my buddies at the time, we entertained a question. Turns out it is a very important question. At the time we only gave lip service to it but didn’t ask it in our hearts. Maybe the others did but I certainly didn’t. It was nothing more to me than a mere intellectual curiosity.

That question was and is, ‘If your success were absolutely guaranteed 25 or more years from now. Without question, you would be then a huge star. You would have everything you want. It is yours. How would you live your life between now and then?’

(Okay – housekeeping note – this is a long one. But do please read to the end. I didn’t want to divide it into installments as I could have.)

Most of us assumed we would stay in workshops and continue the pursuit. Then after discussing the question we continued to do what a lot of actors and others do. We went on complaining about our agents, managers, the casting directors who weren’t seeing us and all the producers and directors who were missing out on our great talents.

We went to classes, those who had part time jobs did them, others worked full time while trying to pursue a career. Some married and with children some without. Juggling a career in the movie business with partner, kids and job can be quite a challenge. Being single, lonely and alone is challenging too.

It is hard in show biz and you know what, it is hard in any career. Becoming an actor, film director, producer, writer, editor and all the rest it’s tough to get in and it is tough to sustain. There is no formula you can follow out of college. Everyone succeeds is an individually unique way.

While traditional businesses offer more provincial routes to success it is not easy there either. Whether you want to be a doctor, lawyer, politician, engineer, realtor, investor, banker, fireman, educator and on and on each has there own share of difficulty and sacrifices that require making.

So back to the question regardless of what career you are in or which one you want to be in. Back to the question even if it isn’t a career that concerns you but life in general. “What would you do if happiness and success were absolutely guaranteed but not for a very long time from now? How would you live between now and then?’

Here is the reason I ask. In order to succeed in anything, the easiest way is to believe you will succeed. You have to know what you want, you have to have a burning desire for its fulfillment and you have to have faith that it is yours and on the way.

You must believe you can make it happen. These were conditions and principles put forth by Andrew Carnegie (at one time the world’s richest man) and through Napoleon Hill (the author of Think & Grow Rich) commissioned by Carnegie to study success.

Hill stated that, ‘whatever the mind of can conceive and believe can be achieved’. It begins with thought and how we manage our thought. It is brought forth by our intense feelings, our passion and desire for its attainment.

It is delivered through unrelenting faith that we will succeed no matter what obstacles rise up before us. It is ours and we will persist until we can claim it.

Said another way, ‘What we hold in our head we will some day hold in our hands’, and ‘What we think about we bring about’. I would add in, ‘what we totally feel in our hearts, all the incredible feelings’ puts the fuel in our engines to get us where we want to go.

Great, we know the formula. What does that have to do with the question. The question is what do you do between now and then when success is unconditionally guaranteed? If you believe that is true, which I did not as a young actor, I thought it was a nice, fanciful idea but nothing is guaranteed, you will operate in a particular way.

You will live from this conviction and it will shape everything you think and do. If you unquestionably know it is yours you live with the confidence that you will have it. It feels good to own it even if it takes a while to claim it. It is yours. It is a given. You are successful and happy. Why would you ever let anything rain on your parade in the meantime?

You have everything you want coming to you. Celebrate and be glad. If you compare now to then and you focus on what you don’t yet have then you get pain and end up in a world of hurt. THAT is what I did. I thought, nice idea but I am suffering and I need it now. You must not think like that!

You must focus on what you want and what you know is coming your way and not on what you don’t want and don’t have.

You will never be happy or successful focused on negativity. You won’t get rich focused on lack. You get happy and rich and successful by first being those on the inside. If you knew ultimately you would triumph why would you ever chose not to live like a successful, happy victor? You wouldn’t if you were convinced you would be, do and have everything you want.

That is Carnegie’s and Hill’s third principle. In order to be successful you must expect to be successful. You must know it in your mind and heart and soul and in every fiber of your being. You must be unstoppable and never deterred.

Every cell, every atom in you knows you will win. This is the mindset we must have to have what we want.

Instead, I focused on my bills, girlfriends or no girlfriends, not having the big home or cars as others did. I focused more on how I wasn’t working enough and how unfair it was that others got breaks that I didn’t. On and on and on it went. I was consumed by all the woe in my life. Whether actual or imagined.

So the question was posed, I thought about it and dismissed it as a curiosity. Nice to entertain but unrealistic. Yet, later I learned that Hill studied over 500 of the wealthiest, most successful powerhouses of his day and that since his work others have done similar and guess what.

Carnegie and Hill were correct. You have to know what you want. You have to feel it as already belonging to you. You have to know this and want it and feel it coming to you with your entire being! You must keep that faith. In the future you are already victorious! You will have everything you want when you truly believe it.

Decades ago I would have called that magical or mystical,fairytale thinking. Nice but cheesy. NOW I know so much better how true it actually it is. It has worked in my own life and continues to and I have seen it work, and helped make it work in countless others’ lives.

When we know what we want we determine where we want to end up. We know what the end result is. We do not yet have to know how to get there but we must know what we want to be, do and have. If we don’t define it and clarify it there is nothing to aim at. The mind needs a well defined clear target.

We must feel it with a burning desire. If we don’t want if very much we won’t do very much to make it happen. We will be lazy and accept whatever. We will drift and not amount to much of anything.

Think about all those romance movies where the valiant swashbuckling hero has to overcome all sorts of tremendous odds in order to win the lady’s heart. He has to win her, overcome insurmountable odds and difficulties and make it back to claim her love.

He has to really want her to fight for her all the way! He has to know that he will fight to the death and come away winning her hand or he is not all in. You must be all in. You must be passionately and wholly committed. You can’t play half assed and expect to win the prize.

WHY? because with a clear target and positive powerful emotions your brain then totally gets it. There is no question about what it is you desire. It is completely clear. Message received!

In order to keep the mind on track you have to stay on target. That is where faith and feelings come in. You have to feel it is yours. You deserve it. It is yours no question.

There are no doubts, no worry, no fears. It is only a matter of time that this or something better will be fulfilled. You are all in and will never give up no matter what.

Now your brain goes to work for you. It makes connections, associations, organizes and utilizes all your resources and abilities to help you make it happen. You become confident in yourself, positive and powerful.

You trust yourself to make it happen. Where there is will there is a way. You are a champion, of course you will triumph! There is no other outcome that could happen. Your success is guaranteed!

Your mind is alerted to possibilities and opportunities. You become sensitized to these in the same way as when you purchase a new car and suddenly, notice all the same make and model on the streets. You look for opportunity and discover them where none seemed to previously exist.

You find yourself drawn to likeminded positive successful people. You discover events and circumstances working for you. Obstacles and challenges provide lessons which you extract, and you adapt and adopt and continue to move forward.

If you know success is yours you let nothing stand in the way. You know that ultimately nothing can or will prevent you from claiming what it is you want. You are already a success within!

So while it may sound like magic this is what we have learned from successful people during the past century and from well beyond that. This is how the kings and rulers think. This is how those born to wealth and privilege think. This is how the successful shakers and doers think. Their mindset paves the way for the results they want to achieve. ‘As above so below. As within so without.’

It is true there are some of trust fund babies who squander their good fortune and make a mess of their lives. By far the majority of successful people will, IF THEY WANT YOU TO KNOW IT, tell you they always knew they would do well and succeed at whatever they wanted. There was NEVER any question. NEVER ANY QUESTION!

For the rest of us we need to cultivate this mindset. We weren’t born into circumstances where we grew up knowing one day all this would be ours. We didn’t have a life where money was no object.

Anything and everything at anytime could be had for a price and we could afford it. We didn’t live this way. Good or bad, right or wrong, thankfully or not we have to develop the winner attitude on our own.

The greatest news for human kind may be that it is ABSOLUTELY POSSIBLE to do! WE CAN DO IT! We can change our lot in life by taking control of our thoughts and feelings and we can begin getting the results we want, and may have always wanted.

THIS is why it is true that the past does not equal the future because no matter what failure, heartbreak or disappointment you may have had in the past YOU CAN RIGHT NOW CHANGE IT FOR THE BETTER!

The decision is yours. You can blow it off as I did the question or you can decide now to turn your life around and start getting everything you deserve. You can live abundantly without having to deprive anyone else of anything too. You can make your dreams come true.

The decision is yours. The time is now. It is a journey but a worthwhile one and the true value of which you will only know once you get on the road. Become unstoppable. Become convinced that you will be, have and do everything you want.

Put these practices to work and discover what I and countless others have discovered, and are discovering. This mind stuff works!!! It absolutely, truly does! There is amazing, dynamic energy and power in a committed, firm decision. It may be unlike anything you have ever experienced up until now.

If you are like some people you may have to get close to hitting bottom before you act in your own best interests. I was like that. The painful signal value had to be really loud, strong and hurtful to get my attention.

If you are like some others, you see the value of an opportunity as it is presented to you. You can make the decision without having to suffer.

Sadly, there will be those, in both groups who do nothing because they simply don’t know any better. That was me too. I couldn’t see opportunity when presented, I was suspicious. I didn’t know enough consider something as that question worthy of my attention so blew it off.

Then I had to let life circumstances and my own negative and bad feelings get strong enough to make me exclaim, ‘I don’t want to live like this anymore! I must do something.’ I began to search.

THIS is what I found. Even then, I dabbled. I dipped my toes in. I went a way for a few years but I kept encountering myself again and again in less than glorious ways. Finally, I decided, ‘I really can’t live this way. I have to change and I will do whatever is required to change it!’ In that moment, I became freer.

I decided I was 100% responsible for anything and everything that happened to me. I would be a victor and a champion. I would fill my mind with positive thoughts and my being with positive glorious feelings.

If I fell I would commit to getting up. If I didn’t feel like it I would forge ahead anyway. There were many times I fell and countless times I didn’t feel like it.

Bottom line: If I can do this ANYONE else in the world can do this too. I am not special, I am not smarter, I am no one at all, just another person on a journey. I committed to it and change began happening.

Slowly, no evidence at all that anything was changing, but in time I felt better. No miracles, nothing. Shit still hit the fan. At first, I was confused and wondered why bad things were still happening but I soon learned it was my response to situations that made the difference. Wondering why only threw me back into negativity.

I learned I had to manage my thinking and steer it back to what I wanted and to focus on what I now have and what I am creating for the future. I have to and had to apply these principles repeatedly to make them a habit.

I was used to doing things other ways before so I had to learn the new ways and make these automatic, AS automatic, as the old ways of doing things. Once that happens it does get easier and easier.

Eventually, I began to notice, not only feeling better and better as a result of my mind, feelings and life becoming more positive, but small wins. Little things, positive things began happening more and more frequently and as they did I felt grateful and celebrated all I could. Gratitude opens a doorway to let so much more come in!

More wins, eventually, bigger wins. The seed sprouted, the tiny plant grows before becoming big and strong. Even more. The feelings and thoughts and results I were getting fed each other. As I felt better more things good seemed to happen. As more good things happened the better I felt. It is as if I can’t separate the two. It is quite glorious!

YET, still there are challenges and that is absolutely okay. I learn from them. I am resolved to being a life long learner. One can’t know everything. So I learn from opportunity and challenges alike. It is so wonderful!

I still fall and I get back up. Not each one is easy to get back up from but it is far easier than before. There is just no way to share how incredible this all is in my life. Words just don’t seem adequate. You really have to experience it for yourself as countless, COUNTLESS others have.

Countless, but the number is far smaller than those who won’t. That is truly sad. They are used to doing things the way they have been doing them. A wise old friend spoke these words, ‘I am awakened, it is true. Once I slept but I awoke and it is glorious. You are sleeping now but one day you too will awaken. That is just how it is.’

We are ready when we are ready. No blame, no excuses, nothing. We come to change in our own time. I love my life and I didn’t always feel that way. I love it and adore it. Funny, but as I typed these words I just had an agent phone me to come in for a call back in two days.

Make your dreams come true. Commit to yourself and making your world better. When you do you find you also want everyone else to have a better world too. Great things await you if you will only claim them and make them yours. If you haven’t already done so do it today!” Rex Sikes

Make today incredible!

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Act As If, Attitude, Beliefs, Confidence, Decision, Emotions, Flow, Healthy Choices, Intentional Thinking, Learning, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Success

What To Do When You Don’t Feel Like It

May 28, 2015 rexsikes Leave a comment

“What do you do when you don’t feel like it? You want to but you don’t? You wish you felt like it but… You know it would be good for you to do it. What are you supposed to do?

DO IT ANYWAY!

Somehow, some people have grown up thinking that if we don’t feel like it then we shouldn’t do it. Our feelings run the show. I am not sure this is normal or natural. For example, It seems that some people have been brave and did amazing things while filled with fear. I am sure they didn’t ‘feel like it’.

They were terrified but acted anyway. They did not let fear stop them. Some people are idiots who have no fear when they should have, but sometimes ordinary people behave in extraordinary ways.

Gandhi fasted. I am sure he felt hungry. He resisted the urge to meet violence with violence. He found another way. Victor Frankl was imprisoned, held captive, yet, felt free within his spirit. He did not let his captivity or his captors crush him.

We have been mislead. We are told feelings matter. They do, but not in the manner we think is most important. It is important to recognize and validate feelings. Feelings drive the show in messaging the subconscious.

We should feel good most of the time in order to make our lives what we want them to be. We should feel good in pursuing our goals and in getting what we want. Feelings are indicators when we are off track and focused on what we don’t want.

Consider The Concept Of Enlightenment

Whomever we are, we are not our thoughts, we are the thinker who thinks the thoughts. We are not our feelings. We are the one who produces feeling in response to our thoughts. We are beyond our thoughts and feelings, yet, most of us think we are our thoughts and feelings.

Some people think if we ‘can’t’ do it, well then, it can’t be done. If we don’t ‘feel like it’ then we won’t do it. Neither of these statements are accurate unless we accept them as accurate. If we accept these notions as true then we are limited by these notions. Still, we know others have accomplished much even when facing incredible personal or real world odds.

Let’s make it even simpler. There are those who, by discipline, exercise ever day even when they don’t feel like it. It’s true, not every day seems like a good day to go to the gym. Some maintain eating a particular way or diet even when they don’t want to.

The military conditions people to do all sorts of things when they may feel otherwise. People don’t have to feel like it in order to do it. Although most of us think we have to because if we don’t feel like it then we just don’t do it.

There may be times when this is acceptable. There are times when it isn’t. Your employer won’t tolerate it for very long if you don’t feel like coming into work often. There are things we do because we must even when we don’t want to or feel like it. So we are capable.

If it is good for you, in your best interests, and you don’t feel like it GO AHEAD and do it anyway. Don’t be a victim to your less than glorious thoughts and feelings. Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps and just do it anyway. Use some intestinal fortitude.

Become Disciplined

Perhaps, that is what discipline is. The ability to be consistent and persistent in spite of our feelings or obstacles that may attempt to prevent us. We stay on course no matter what the distractions.

We focus and aim at the target and do not waiver. Sometime you just have to stick to it. Don’t be like a cork bobbing on the water going wherever the current takes it. Be the captain of your ship. Be in charge of your own power so you can steer yourself and get yourself to wherever you want to go.

You should be the victor and not the victim of your thoughts, feelings, and circumstances. You can be a champion. In order to be a champion you have to stop with the excuses. You have to take responsibility. You have to persist and be willing to see it through even if you don’t feel like it.

You don’t feel like cleaning the house. Do it anyway. In fact, do it first before you do anything else. Don’t let it sit out there as a task looming over you. Get it out of the way. Take charge, take action.

Take a small step in the right direction and then do another one after that. Then another and before you know it you will be done. Every time you go in and out of a room make it a point to put something away. Soon your house will be cleaner.

Find ways to accomplish whatever you need to. Stop excusing yourself for not feeling like it! DO it anyway. You will feel better about yourself in the long run. It can be a good feeling when you push through it because you discover you were capable all along.

The trick is not to play the blame game or the excuses game. Just do whatever is in your best interest. Be responsible. Take responsibility for your thoughts, your feelings and your actions. Run them instead of letting them run you. You can be aware of them without letting them dictate who you are and what you are able to do.

You Have Choices

Something, has come along and upset your life. Some bad event. You got thrown off course. You feel like chucking it. At this moment you don’t want to put on a happy face and feel better. You prefer to curse it and stew in it. Okay that is a choice. How soon do you think you will feel better? Time will take care of it. It may?

What have you learned by this? Sit and let things do whatever they do. Wait and when ready resume. It is an option probably valid at times. However, you are not in charge. Something else is in charge of you. Think about that for a moment.

You could take charge. You could determine your destination and the course you want to travel. You could make it a point to do something that makes you feel a bit better. You can do anything positive to feel a bit more positive.

You begin to move in that direction even when you may not feel like it. You inch your way along until you can take bigger steps. You don’t deceive yourself with limited thinking. You don’t whine, complain, blame yourself, the circumstances or anyone else.

You push through it and surprise yourself that you can exceed your limitations. You discover you can go much further when you allow yourself, even if you have to force yourself. What have you learned by this? Think about this for a moment.

You can be victim or victor. It really is up to the decision you make. After all, it is your life. You may not be in a prisoner in a cell like Victor Frankl, you may be a free person. If you are a free person act like it. Be free. Act free.

You Are Beyond You Thoughts And Feelings. Act Like It

Use your feelings Don’t be used by your feelings. Recognize them for what they are. They are a signal system. The indicate whether or not you are on track and closing in on your goal. When you are feeling positive you are on course.

When they are less than glorious they indicate you are off track and you are paying attention to what you don’t want. You won’t make your life better thinking and pursuing what you do not want. So the negative feelings provide you the opportunity to change direction and move back towards what you do want.

Don’t be a prisoner of limited thinking. Stop thinking ‘I can’t’ and begin thinking ‘I can!’ Exceed your limits. Go beyond them in ways that delight and surprise you. Don’t let your thoughts or feelings stop you from doing something that truly benefits you or others. Find the ways to let go and make it happen. Start living your positive dreams!” Rex Sikes

I’ll share more that you can do to feel ‘like it’ when you don’t in upcoming blog.

Be good to yourself today!

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If Your Personal Computer Is Sabotaging You; Fix It!

May 27, 2015 rexsikes 1 Comment

“Have you tried to make a change and found it difficult? Perhaps, it worked for awhile but then you reverted back to the old issue? Even though you may have promised yourself ‘this time will be different’ it wasn’t very long until it was back the same? If you answered yes to these questions you may need to look at self image.

People think or verbalize statement such as ‘that is just not me’ or ‘I would never wear that’ or ‘i can’t stop eating’ or ‘I just have a lot of nervous energy’ or ‘I could never do that’ and more. Many more! These ARE affirmations of our self image. NO they aren’t Positive Affirmations.

Careful, You Are Already Using Affirmations

No, they are not the kind we talk about when we say you need to repeat affirmations for success but they work exactly the same way. We already DO think and repeat these over and over again just as we are encouraged to do with the Positive kind! We live these daily.

These self image affirmations we utter work to keep us consistent. They work to keep us consistently the person we say we are. Who we are is a result of the self image we maintain. They affirm what we are like and what we can and can’t do. These thoughts and utterances of ours affirm our boundaries. They work REALLY well!

They maintain our limits. We have an internal image of who we are and what we are capable of and what we deserve in life that we live from and fulfill. We produce or don’t produce results consistent with who we are and what this image of ourself is.

We won’t do anything inconsistent with our self image. When we do try to change behaviors we find it difficult because we are attempting to do something ‘unlike’ us. We tend to think of ourselves as a smart or dumb person, fat or thin, happy or unhappy, successful or not, rich or poor, easy going or not… The list goes on.

Become Aware Of All Your ‘I’ Statements

We can get a clue as to what our self image actually is by paying attention to our thoughts, these notions about ourself, and the utterances or exclamations we make during the day. When times are good and when times are rough ‘we show up’. If we pay attention we can begin to get a sense of who we are on the inside.

We have a composite of images, sounds and feelings of who we are and who we are not. We can even look at our own internal images on our own inner movie screen and see who we think we are. Who and what do we represent ourself to be inside our head?

From the dawn of time, ancient practitioner of these arts have attempted to get us to maintain a positive self image and move beyond our boundaries into happiness, well-being and success. Some have used their approaches with incredible results!

Maxwell Maltz was a plastic surgeon who, because of his work making people pretty and repairing damaged looks, began to explore this area. He did this because people surprised him. An unhappy patient would come to him desperately wanting to look a certain way. He’d provide it but the person remained unhappy.

At first he was confounded. He wanted to know how this was possible. Though they didn’t exist, as we know them today, it was as if an internal computer was running the show. Whatever the programmed software was dictated the results one gets. Today, we know the results you get on a computer ARE determined by what the software is programmed to do.

Self Image Runs The Show

He provides numerous examples in his books. What he discovered was his patients had an internal picture, an image of who they were. Regardless of the outer change they lived from the one inside their heads. The internal image, this self image, runs the show just as a computer does. Whatever is within is what gets output consistently.

Maltz began to explore what people were doing and what they could do differently in their imagination to get what they wanted. As a doctor and businessman he wanted satisfied and happy patients.

His works have sold steadily since 1960. He became a mojor proponent of personal change and development. His break through book was called Psycho Cybernetics. It is as relevant today as it was back then. You can find it and read it. Read it over and over!

He proffered that behaviors stem from our self image. This is the mental picture we have created of ourself. Many people attempt to change behaviors but find this nearly impossible because the behaviors they want to change are automated habits.

Maltz’s patients wanted to become happy by changing their appearance. This rarely worked because they (we) have a persistent automated self image. In order for their lives to be happy (our lives to be happy) they had to work (we have to work) on the inner person before anything else.

There Is An Order To Positive Change; A Recipe

Maltz reasoned that most people encounter difficulty because they put the cart before the horse. They tried to change the behaviors first and that should not be the first order of business. Imagine a ladder with self image at the top run and behaviors further down on the rungs.

In order to change these behaviors Maltz stated you first had to change the mental image. Once you change your internal picture of self your behaviors can change. You change your personality, your self image and your behaviors change because a self image change is a higher order change. It governs the rest.

We know that thought precedes action. To change our feelings and behaviors we must first change our thoughts. Humans have not accomplished or built anything that they first didn’t create inside their heads and then build with their hands. Our own personal changes are accomplished the same way.

If we want to succeed in the outer world we must first succeed in our inner world. Who and what we think we are determines how we feel about ourselves and what we will do to achieve our dreams (assuming we have dreams). If we want to be happy in life we must first be happy within. ‘As within. So without. As above. So Below’ is an ancient principle.

Join me in my next blog! I’ll continue to share what Maltz and other thoughts leaders insist will get you the most change in the least time in the easiest fashion. When you know how to work with your own system it is much easier. There are precise things you and I can do to be, do and have anything we want in life. Join me next time and spread the word Life is and can be glorious for you!” Rex Sikes

Have a remarkable day! See you tomorrow.

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The Easy Way To Keep Your Life & Career From Going Bad

May 26, 2015 rexsikes 2 Comments

” The goal, as I write in these pages, is to feel the best you are able to at any given moment. Even, if you only feel a little bit better, that is what matters. It matters that you move yourself in the positive direction of feeling good. The results can be amazing!

It absolutely matters that YOU choose what you want to make yourself feel because it has an incredibly powerful and profound lasting effect. Your life can absolutely change from bad to better and from better to best when you apply these principles and practices.

Steer Toward The Positive

I have mentioned numerous times that it is necessary to cultivate the ability to steer back toward the positive. This is a skill that can be developed. ‘How?’ you ask. Take 100% responsibility for your thoughts and feelings. Promise yourself you will learn to be in charge.

Train your mind to see the good in everything. Train yourself to find the best feelings you are able to at all times. Keep your focus on the positive. What seems impossible to do at first and requires discipline becomes easier and easier the more you do it.

Develop These Abilities As Habits

Make your thoughts and feelings work for you instead of you working for them. It is said about the wealthy they don’t work for their money. They have learned how to make their money work for them. It’s true! They make money while they sleep from a variety of sources.

The same is true about your thoughts, attitude and mindset. Make your mind work for you instead of you being a victim of it. Learn to control your thoughts and feelings. Be the master not the servant. They do not teach you this in school unfortunately.

Usually, we are taught we have no control over anything but if we work hard we can succeed. Consider it one of the best kept secrets ‘they’ don’t want you to know about. You can control your thoughts and feelings.

Your Mind Is The One Thing You Can Have Complete Control Of

Once you master your mind you can shut it off. You can give up control once you have it, whenever you like. Once you learn that your thoughts are subject to your will you realize YOU are bigger than your thoughts. You are bigger than your thoughts.

You will be in charge of the thoughts you think instead of you thinking that the thinking is going on outside of your control. Do you get that? It is a silly thought to think that you can’t control what you think. Why would you ever think that. You wouldn’t if you were in charge of your thoughts.

You think those kind of silly things because somewhere in your life time you co-opted the thoughts of others. You didn’t even realize that was what you were doing while it was going on but it was.

You adopted thoughts from others as your own instead of thinking for yourself. Realize you have power to seize control and seize it! Anyone can do it. Few actually will. Be one of the few that do instead of the countless that won’t. Make your live wonderful!

If you think silly, useless or stupid, destructive thoughts, or weak, wimpy, powerless thoughts that is what you get back. You will get back in results THE Results of your crappy ineffective thinking. Is that what you want? If the answer is no then now is the time to learn to take control.

Decide What You Will Think And Feel

Control means you decide what you will think and feel. It means you allow what you want to experience and ignore or eliminate that which you don’t. It means you can start thoughts that help you and stop those that don’t. When you want to meditate or relax you can choose your thoughts or turn them off.

You can’t relinquish control if you don’t have it in the first place. You have to be in control to let go of control. Control means you train your mind and make your mind YOUR servant. Make your mind work for you automatically instead of you working for it.

You only have to move yourself incrementally in the right direction bit by bit over time, repeatedly, in order to learn how to manage your thoughts and feelings. It is similar to learning to ride a bike or drive a car or anything else you have ever learned to do. It is a skill, and ability you can get better at and get good at the more you do it.

Correct Repetition Builds Skill And Brings Benefits

The more you do it and the better you get at it the more confidence and competence you develop. The more you do it the more you are able to do and the better you feel. It continues this way. Everything begins getting better because you started making small but purposeful changes.

The art is learning to promote what you want to grow and enjoy and to let go of that which causes pain or suffering. Plenty occurs in the world that we might get caught up in for any length of time. Awareness, is when we notice we are not doing what we want to, we are not working according to plan and we steer back onto track.

Instead of feeling bad about going off course we celebrate getting back on course. All of us can go off course. That is part of living. Getting back on course is what we learn to do. We are gentle and loving and accepting of ourselves through it all. We find reasons to enjoy life and celebrate.

If I Can Do It I Know You Can Probably Do It Even Better

I choose to think about my children. I focus on how lucky I am to have them in my life and how great I feel. I count my blessings in many other ways. Family, friends, opportunity, difficult life lessons, experiences, travels, talents, events, all make up my life and my world. I am grateful for all of it. My life is perfect each moment.

When I focus on these things, before you know it, I feel much better. It is easy to feel better when we devote a bit of time to it. Because birds of a feather flock together once we find the first thing, or first few things to celebrate more flock to our mind. We find other things to become thankful about and celebrate.

Remember all the reasons you usually feel delighted. Don’t just intellectually recount these but feel them. Really allow yourself to feel the gratitude and the celebration.

I write this today because sometimes we can benefit from a nudge in the right direction. Keep at it. Make it a habit. It gets easier and easier. Any bumps in the road are there for you to learn how to not be thrown of course by bumps in the road. Pretty soon you can navigate pretty much any way. Enjoy and celebrate the process!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy today!

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Forget Your Weaknesses: Develop Your Strengths!

May 22, 2015 rexsikes Leave a comment

“If you learned you need to get better at what you are poor at you learned wrong. If your parents or teachers or anyone told you to develop and work on your weaknesses they were incorrect. You could spend a lot of time devoted to what you aren’t good at and be wasting a lot of your time!

Stop! Make a change that will bring you better results and greater satisfaction. Work on and develop your strengths! Take what you are good at and get great at it! This makes the most sense. This will get you the best result for your efforts.

Your Strengths Give You The Edge

Take your talents to the next level and the level after that. Your strengths are what you should be furthering. Who knows how far you could go if you focused on making your best even better?

Developing your weaknesses sounds good but if you suck at something how long will it take until you are mediocre at it? Meanwhile, the best you got is languishing. It is silly to let your best go to waste while you focus on what you are the least good at.

Remember, what you focus on expands. What you think about most you become. What you put out there comes back to you. SO why spend all your time putting energy into what you aren’t very good at?

Put Your Energy Into Where You Are Good And Excel!

Emphasize and spend time with all that is the best of you. Think about what you are good at rather than what you aren’t good at. Focus on your strengths and develop those. Your strong points give you the edge your weaknesses won’t.

If you are bad at something and you keep trying to get better at it its more apt to break your confidence and crush your spirit. Build up your wins, feel the best, and live from where you are strong.

It makes sense if you are socially inept, if you aren’t able to communicate well; if you can not look another person in the eye and talk to them than yes, you should develop your skills to be able to do so. One of the best ways you do that is to develop your confidence.

Focusing On Your Best Develops Your Confidence

How do you develop confidence? You develop your confidence by making your best better. You feel confident when you take stock of and keep in mind what you are good at; you remember your talents and abilities. Confidence comes from winning and excelling.

It is wiser to start at the top and go higher than to begin at the bottom and work your way up to the middle. Skyrocket don’t struggle.

Be confident while staying humble. Bragging isn’t real confidence it is based in fear. When you really are good you know it you don’t have to prove it.

In your career, your occupation, your job, even your school you can bet you will be rewarded with a promotion or a raise or an honorable notice for what you are best at not what you suck at. Put your best foot forward not your worst. Develop your skills and abilities. You will be glad you did!” Rex Sikes

It is your day to make what you will of it!

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Do This: Whenever You Are Frustrated. When It Just Isn’t Happening!

May 21, 2015 rexsikes 1 Comment

“Why are you frustrated? You don’t seem to be making headway fast enough? You probably hate it when someone says, ‘relax. Be patient.’ You don’t want patience right, you want your efforts to pay off now! Don’t you?

That, wanting, that desire, that insisting, THAT IS your suffering.

You are trying to push a rope. You are trying to force the process. You are trying to make water boil faster and you just can’t. Instead of relaxing and letting go you are getting hot. You do need to be patient and that makes it all the more difficult, doesn’t it?

You are split. You want it, it isn’t working. You know you shouldn’t feel this way but you do. You go back and forth, you can’t make it hurry and you are in a hurry. You are divided. Bouncing back and forth as if off walls. Guess what? You really CAN’T force it.

You do have to relax and wait. SO you might as well learn how to.

If you don’t know relaxation methods you should. Learn them when you don’t need them or when you do. Just take sometime and learn to relax, let go and enjoy life in spite of everything. Learn the value and importance of taking a break, a vacation from your woes. Listen to relaxation mp3s online or CDs. Take a class.

Go somewhere nice for a few days. Enjoy something. Actually take your mind off it. Meditate, go work out, work in the garden. Walk. But take a well needed, well deserved break. Seek to develop the abilities to accept, to let go, to relax and to be patient.

Those who are truly successful know what they can and can’t control. If they can’t control time then they use their time to feel better. The unsuccessful use their time to feel worse. Which do you want to be?

Go golfing, swimming, camping. Engage in a hobby. Have some fun. Let go. Successful people take out their yacht, their Porsche. They do anything to take a break. They aren’t going to let themselves feel frustrated when there are better feelings to enjoy!

You can be, do and have anything you want in life when you first determine what it is you want. Then you passionately let it consume you and you pursue it with persistence. You don’t quit until you have it.

You can transform yourself into a relaxed, successful person with a winning attitude and winning behaviors by beginning to imagine yourself as that kind of person, if you aren’t already.

Go back through my blog site and read and review my posts on how to become who you want to become. Learn to do what you want to be able to do. Find out how to get whatever it is you what to have.

Patience is your attitude and behavior while you wait. It is what you think and do in the meantime. It defines who you are. Patience means you are waiting for an expected outcome.

Imagine how different people were a couple centuries ago. There was no instant on anything, no high speed internet, no jet travel, no microwaves. Whatever time it took, took the time it took to complete.

People had to wait for water to boil; it took time to build a fire and warm the house. Trips took however long they took by horse, ship, and eventually by rail. To cross the ocean or the country you live in took a long time. You couldn’t be in too much of a rush if things too weeks and months. My guess is they were qualitatively different than we are today.

For everything there is a season. Farmers planted and harvested in whatever time it took. They grew up used to waiting. Waiting was a big part of life. Mail took a long time. Communication and change was slow. There was no emergency medicine as we know it. No 911 responders.

People had a much different relationship to time. My guess is that they were less in a hurry than modern people because they grew up waiting for many things. Either you got used to it as a life style or you suffered. BUT they also didn’t have any difference to compare it to.

Those who have grown up with instant access, drive-up banking, microwaves, high speed this and that, the media and advertisers’ promise of faster, quicker, overnight, you can have it yesterday magic pills and silver bullets, get frustrated when things take time.

We think everything should be quicker, easier, take no effort, take no time AND be better. Our thoughts determine what we experience. We don’t have the same quality of patience as the people who lived long ago. We need to think the thoughts that serve us better. Our thoughts are what we can control!

That farmer, back then, planted and expected to harvest a crop. Sometimes the weather or conditions changed and crops failed, Sometime they were more bountiful but either way that farmer planted, WAITED and EXPECTED to harvest. It took all the required time it took. He had to do other things in the meantime!

Wait and see meant wait and see.

Patience requires faith. In faith you wait for what you believe will happen, what you know will happen. You wait for what you expect to happen. After all you expect the sun to come up tomorrow. It is a given. You expect the Christmas holiday madness near the end of each year. These are givens!

If you chose to take a pleasure cruise across the seas you expect to get to your destination. You don’t doubt that you will get there, although anything is possible. You have faith that you will arrive when you arrive. So you can relax and enjoy the journey.

When it comes to making our dreams come true and accomplishing our goals patience is required. We plant the seeds, we think about it day and night, we visualize, we affirm, we work our plan and we wait.

How we wait is important. Either you are patient and expect good things or you are frustrated, tense, hurried and frazzled.

If we are patient we know it is happening. It is coming there is no question about that. It’s a given! The time doesn’t matter because we have put it into motion. We are initiators. We are creators. We make things happen. It will happen, we know it, it is just a matter of when. We have faith.

Yes, that may be tougher today because of our modern conveniences and our relationship to time but patience is still required. It is an attribute or characteristic that serves us well.

We shouldn’t be making excuses and whining and complaining and blaming others or the era we are born into. We should be cultivating winning behaviors and attitudes that make our success and happiness more likely.

You don’t cultivate new thoughts and behaviors thinking and doing the old ones repeatedly. We must change our thoughts and behaviors if we want changes in our lives. We must develop those areas that help us reliably get what we want.

We need to exercise our positivity, our faith, our patience and our persistence. We must commit to excellence.

We must wait expecting the positive outcome. We can’t dig the seeds up and check. We must not let out circumstances convince us that anything but the outcome we want, or better, is on the horizon.

If we give in to worry, doubt, fear, we undo our efforts. We get mixed results. We take a step forward and then backwards. We get caught up. Then we don’t have faith, patience or positive expectations. We are frustrated. You don’t move forward quickly if you undo each forward step you take.

We are looking at the wrong things. We are looking at results we created previously that are presently manifesting while the new results are growing in darkness. Keep your faith no matter what.

In order to get what we want we must remain laser like focused. We must rest assured. We must be convinced. We must know in our heart we have done the necessary work (when we actually have) and now it is only a matter of time. AND we continue to do whatever is necessary; we continue to have faith and wait expectantly.

How do we live in the meantime? We celebrate, we enjoy, we live in the present to the fullest. We delight and are thankful and live with true gratitude. We let every moment fill us. When there are obstacles we overcome them by utilizing our personal resourcefulness. We have a winning attitude! We know how to relax too.

We live with passion, we live in this moment knowing good things are coming in the future. We know that what we have put in motion and what we keep in motion will be ours soon enough. We know the garden we planted in time will bloom. We nurture it along and enjoy where we are now at. This is a great way to live!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy and have fun today!

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Who Is Your Boss? Who Runs The Show?

May 18, 2015 rexsikes 2 Comments

“Who is your Boss? The Boss runs the show. Are you the Boss of your own life? Many of us like to think we are? But are we? Who is running the show in your life? If you aren’t the Boss you can bet someone or something else is. They could care less about you!

Be The Boss Of Your Own Life

Whatever distracts you from creating your life as you want it; whatever distracts you from maintaining your positive attitude; whatever distracts you from moving towards accomplishing your goals each day IS your Boss.

Whatever the limitation that prevents you from pursuing your dreams and making them happens is the Boss. This Boss controls your time, your output, your results, and your rewards. This Boss controls you.

If your watching TV, going out for cocktails, hanging with the boys or the girls or gaming instead of working towards what you want you then these distractions are your Boss. These distractions are preventing you from the success and happiness you want and deserve.

Your Habits Determine Who The Boss Is

Instead of doing what you can be doing to have a better life you let whims dictate how your life will be. If you aren’t in charge of yourself then your poor habits will be in charge of you. Others run the show. You won’t benefit by their control. You will lose out.

In order to win you have to run the race. You can’t quit or get distracted by something on the sidelines. You must focus on the prize, pace yourself and do your very best. Less than that means it is likely you won’t finish first.

Don’t let comparisons stop you either. Don’t let imitation thinking prevent you from giving it your all. There are always stronger, faster, richer, smarter, better looking competitors who seem to have every advantage but you can’t let that dissuade you. They can lose too.

Slow And Steady Wins The Race

Remember, the fable of the tortoise and the hare. The hare had speed and was confident he would take the prize. So over confident, in fact, he took a nap near the finish line. Hubris did the rabbit in.

The tortoise kept a diligent steady pace, did not stop but kept on going. Slow and steady he won the race. The rabbit awoke to watch the hare cross the finish line. The tortoise was in control.

Be the Boss of your thought and of your own habits. Control your time, energy, and attention. Commit to winning the prize and to nothing else. If you go about it sloppily and half-assed you aren’t going to get there anytime soon.

Do not give away your power to others, to activities, to things or to places that do not benefit you in the long term. Stop wasting time with and limitations distractions. Decide how to best spend your time to live the life you want.

Limit Distractions And Unproductive Behaviors

Avoid negative media messages that bring your down. Avoid people who just aren’t productive for you to be around. Learn to say NO to those elements which don’t lift you up or move you forward. Value yourself, your time and your dreams.

Whining, complaining, making excuses, rationalizing, are all distractions. These do not get you any closer to making your dreams come true. Only think and speak that which blesses, heals and prospers you and others.

Stop! Don’t let your negative thoughts be your Boss. Don’t let limited, ‘I Can’t Do It’ thinking prevent you from trying and making it. BE the Boss of your thoughts and behaviors. BE an ‘I Can Do It’ person.

Keep Your Power Use Your Powers

Set your mindset and attitude to positive. When your thoughts and desires are aligned, and you congruently feel good and optimistic about getting your goals, things go easier.

You work smarter, not necessarily harder. You are more resourceful. Your time is spent on productive activity. You feel wonderful and you see opportunity more readily.

You handle challenges more easily. Everything is better when you are in charge positively! Be your own Boss and make your dreams come true!” Rex Sikes

You have another beautiful day to make the most of!

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Haven’t You Been A Loser Long Enough? Do This To Win!

May 17, 2015 rexsikes Leave a comment

“Are you dissatisfied with the results you have been getting? Are you unhappy with where you are at? Maybe things are mostly okay but you seem stuck? You want to advance but you aren’t moving ahead quick enough? There is something you can do.

I don’t like the term positive thinking because it has been misunderstood by too many. Some people just don’t get what it is about because there are those who have stated that it is wishful thinking, hoping, and unrealistic dreaming. I disagree. So I prefer to call it Intentional Thinking.

Intentional Thinking Means You Choose Your Thoughts

You are in charge. You are the decision maker. It is pretty easy to know whether or not you are doing it correctly. Either you are thinking what you intend to or you are not. Your thoughts are either positive and productive or negative and not. You either feel like a winner or like a loser. If you are losing you can change that.

It’s your choice. You are not your thoughts! You think thoughts! Thoughts come from everywhere. Much of the thoughts we think and the thought paths we go down are a result of others; people in authority, peers, the media, some we generate on our own but most of our thinking we adopt or adapt from the outside.

Rather than being victim of unwanted thoughts or thought patterns I recommend you choose what you want to think. You are bigger than the thoughts in your head and the ones you speak so you should be in charge. Sadly, many people are not. They let all these other people’s thoughts dictate how their life will be.

On top of that they have routine, habitual thoughts. They spend time thinking thoughts of sadness, worry, defeat, failure, negativity, blaming, whining, excusing. Their lives reflect their mental attitude too. They lose, they worry they will lose. They try to avoid losing. They fear they don’t have enough, won’t be enough and aren’t enough.

It is simple. Your thoughts either inspire or fatigue you. They either motivate you or scare you. They are either positive or negative. They either move you closer to your goal, keep you stuck, or move you further away. Just as in football the ball is either advancing toward the goal line or it is not.

Break The Loser Mentality Cycle

You choose! That is the one power you are assured of in this life. You can choose your thoughts. While it may seem difficult due to years of habitual defeatist thinking choosing your thoughts IS the one power you definitely have. Either you choose your thoughts or they are choosing you. So what is it going to be?

Are you thinking what serves you? Are you thinking thoughts that make your life better? Either you are or you aren’t? Are you thinking what you intend to think? Are you moving yourself down the field closer to your goal? If yes, fantastic! If no, then you must change something you are doing. You must change what you think and are focused on.

Thoughts flock together just like birds. One negative thought produces so many others. Our brains work by association and one idea leads to another. Soon we are swept up in a whirlwind of less than glorious thoughts that produce less than glorious feelings at the same time. We think poorly and feel poorly. Woe is me!

You have to break the cycle. One positive intentional thought you produce will lead to a flock of other positive thoughts. However, if your thinking has been routinely, habitually less than glorious, haphazard and unintentional, you have to stick with it and guide your thoughts. You have to be the chooser for awhile.

Choose: Become Aware Of Your Productive Thoughts

You have to be aware and deliberately choose the positive thoughts you want to keep and ignore or eliminate the negative ones that drag you down. You have to overcome the routine doubts, worry or fear that you have tolerated and accepted as your reality for so long.

The negative thoughts will persist for awhile. Why? Because that is what you have been habitually doing. You need to develop a new productive, positive habit. Don’t worry (worry is the old way) you will succeed as you persist. Set your course and determine to get there!

Commit to staying as positive as you can. Step by step. Even when the negative thoughts rear their ugly head you can overcome them by staying the course. Don’t be tricked or deceived! Don’t give in or give up. Remember, drop by drop the tub gets filled. Little by little you will make headway

If you fall off the horse get right back on. Focus your attention on being positive. Accept only the thoughts you INTEND! Be deliberate! Choose what you want to focus on. Bring your attention and energy only to what you want. Let go of the thoughts that don’t serve you. Give up the old unproductive ways and pursue the new.

While it seems difficult at first, the good news is, it gets easier and easier. Once you start choosing you discover the power in your choice. When you accept responsibility, 100% responsibility, for all your thoughts you step into your power. Ultimately, the new way becomes a habit and automated.

You are no longer a victim, you no longer drift haphazardly like a cork floating on the water but you move because of your own volition. You take charge of your thinking and your feeling and you claim your mind, body and life back. You determine how things will be. You exercise your power because you discover your power.

What You Get And What You Got Has Always Been Up To You

In case it hasn’t already occurred to you – you are already a powerful creator. You are 100% responsible for your life conditions as they currently are. Sure, you can blame it on others, or the economy, or god, or whatever but what has that gotten you so far. It certainly hasn’t and won’t change anything BUT YOU can!

Do you have what you want?

Is it mostly, somewhat or not even close to the life you would choose for yourself? If you don’t like your current lifeYOU CAN change it. You created this one, unintentionally perhaps, now create the one you intend to create. Create the life you want! You should be living the life you intend to live!

If you want to know how to take charge read through all these blog posts again. If you haven’t already start at the beginning. Go back and re-read as many times as you can, days and weeks apart because you will discover new things each time you revisit these materials.

Read Napoleon Hill, Wallace Wattles and others whose works, along with ancient texts, stand the proof of time. Do something in your own best interests. Be your own best friend and do that which will help you feel the way you want, be the way you want, and have what you want! Fill your mind with the positive thoughts you want!

Attitude Determines Your Altitude

If you are unhappy with the outside world. If you don’t like the results you have been getting then you must change your thinking. You can’t change the outside world until you first change your inside world. It begins with you!

Once YOU develop a powerful, positive, habitual attitude and mindset you can influence the outer world in amazing ways. You can begin to get the results you want in the world. It begins within you! You begin to create and shape and influence the world. Whatever the world gives you you make better!

This moment the decision is yours! What will you commit to? Either you remain a victim of unintended, haphazard, wishy washy or mostly negative thinking or you chose to become a power house who goes after and gets your dreams and goals.

Either You Transform Your Life Or You Don’t

You either transform your life or you don’t. No one will do it for you. The world isn’t going to change for you. Either you do it now or you wait some more. I can promise you this, you have already waited long enough. Some day just never comes.

Either you take control in this moment or you don’t. You are either positive or negative. You are in control or you are being controlled. Which will you live with? What will you do? Right now you are getting exactly what you you want or don’t want.

Your life is already a reflection of your thinking. How and what you have been thinking has brought you where you are in the world today. What you think from this day forward will determine where you are next.

You can’t escape your thoughts. You are either the captain of your ship or you are passenger being taken for a ride. Which do you want to be? Your choice. You can begin today a entirely new wonderful way to live. So won’t you? Do it now! ” Rex Sikes

Transform your day into something miraculous!

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Are You Headed In The Wrong Direction? How You Can Tell!

May 16, 2015 rexsikes Leave a comment

“How can you tell if you are moving in the right direction? Why is being focused on what you want such an issue? How come you can’t focus on what you don’t want or nothing at all? What about luck? Isn’t it possible to make it without all this positive mind thinking stuff?

Some people think this way. They have reasons for not thinking positive. They want to do it their way. If they are getting the results they want to get and are happy with their lives more power to them. I have no argument with that.

The Issue Is What You Focus On

The problem for most of us is this. If you think, ‘I hate it here’ that thought doesn’t tell you where else would be better. It only keeps you locked into what is uncomfortable. It focuses you on what you do not like now.

It doesn’t help you to see what might be better now or in the future. It gets you no closer to your goals nor does it provide any direction for you to get them. If you are focused on what you don’t want you are not headed in the right direction.

When you catch yourself doing this, ask yourself, ‘where else would I rather be?’ Then focus on the answer you get. Discover your destination. Choose it! Then you can ask ‘why do I want to be there? ‘or ‘why do I want this?’ and that will help get you the reasons and the motivations. (more on the power of why in a future blog post).

If you ask, ‘how can I get there’ you may get the answer or you may not know it yet. That is okay. Ultimately, you will develop a plan. Knowing where you want to be and why are actually a very good start. It gives you direction and reasons for moving ahead.

Brains Target Results – Learn To Use This

Brains move in a direction. Your mind moves in a direction. It targets and goes after what you want if you train it to go after what you want. Otherwise, it will go after whatever has the highest emotional signal value. Whatever you think about most during your day.

If what you don’t want looms up in front of you and you intensely react with fear or loathing your brain will get it for you. It doesn’t know not to. It understands powerful images and feelings. It targets them and works to get more of them.

If on the other hand what you want is powerful and you feel intensely good feelings it will go after that. It doesn’t know not to because it targets based on what you hold in your mind and what you intensely feel.

The cool part is being positive and feeling positive feels better for you. SO you get what you want while enjoying the feelings. This is reason enough to think positive, don’t you think?

However, if you go back and forth you get mixed results. If you want it but doubt it your brain starts and stops. You focus on what you want and then don’t want, then want, your brain tries to give you each and you end up stuck with poor results. You have to choose!

If You Do Nothing Nothing Will Change

You can hope you get there. You can wish. You can wait for something to change. You can rely on luck to help out. You could do nothing at all and remain where you are ‘hating it’, OR you can decide what you want is to not be stuck and do whatever it takes to travel to where you want. You must decide!

You know what you didn’t want. You knew what you hated. This provided the impetus for you to change. The bad thoughts and feelings alerted you that you were in a place you did not want to be.

If you use these feelings correctly they help you to clarify what you DO want so you can move away from what you hate and begin getting what you want. It helps you moved from stuck to action.

Clarify And Visualize What You Want

Now stay focused on what it is you want. Imagine what you want clearly in your mind’s eye, in your mental movie theater. See it as if you already have what you want. Imagine how good this feels. Stay with the feelings. Emphasize them. Allow them to grow. Really feel them!

See it as vividly as you can. Imagine looking out through your own eyes and seeing this world from your point of view. You are living your dreams. You have what you want. What are you seeing? What are you hearing? What are you feeling? What are you experiencing?

How To Target And Visualize

As an example, if you imagined yourself in a new home. What does it feel like to live there? What’s it like to walk from room to room? What do you see? How are the rooms decorated and furnished? This is your home see it in detail. Inside and outside? What kind of car is in the driveway? What’s the landscaping like? Who lives there with you?

Imagine what you say to yourself when you have what you want, what do you hear? Enjoy all these incredible feelings? Perhaps, there are smells associated with this home, enjoy them. Make it as real as possible as if you can reach out and touch it.

Use Affirmations Keep It Positive

Affirm this! Keep your self-talk positive? See this in your mind again and again. What we are consumed with we create. What we think about we bring about. What we hold in our head first we can some day hold in our hand. Ask Directed Questions™.

Visualize it day and night. There are two ways to imagine it. You can see yourself over there in the house and watch yourself walk through it. You can see how you behave in your home. This is great. Let it inspire you! Also, you can imagine it from your point of view as I previously described. BOTH are fantastic and powerful.

You can keep a vision board and get pictures of your home. You can tour homes with real estate agents and take your a picture of the home you want. AND take pictures with YOU IN the type of home you want. DO whatever you can to make the images real to you.

It Is Okay If You Don’t Have A Plan Yet

You may not yet know how you are going to make this happen and that is okay. Keep focused on what you want. Keep savoring the wonderful feelings. The more intensely you feel these as you imagine having it the more your subconscious works on it. You will develop a plan. You may want to set a realistic deadline date, or not.

In the meantime, enjoy it. Be grateful for everything. Feel passionate about the home. Know it is coming. Expect it. Think ‘I am creating this or something better!’ Allow for something even better than what you have created to be yours. Be willing to be surprised!

Be Committed And You Will Get Results

You don’t really get anywhere because YOU aren’t COMMITTED to any one direction. To get what you want you must be focused on what you want to the exclusion of all else. Keep your eye on the prize no matter what it takes or how long. Dedicate yourself!

Don’t compare, now to then. Don’t let not having it presently keep you from not having it in the future. Don’t be wishy washy, don’t go back and forth. Focus on what you want. Intend it! Create it! Make it happen! Have backbone more than wishbone. Persist in your pursuit.

Do not focus on what you don’t want. Learn the art of self control. Stay with your goal. Know what you want and imagine getting it and having it. Learn to manage your thoughts and feelings and make them work for you. Either YOU are in charge of your thoughts or your thoughts are in charge of you. Decide which it is going to be!

The key is to turn completely away from the negative and toward the positive. DO not let present circumstances dissuade you from your goal. Do not let obstacles distract you. Keep focused on creating what you want. What you think about you bring about!

You always get results! You always get results, intended or otherwise. You want to get intended results, don’t you? Then you must know what you want. You must know where you want to go. This is the necessary first step in the journey. Then you must commit to making it happen.

If you don’t know what you want or where you want to get how do you expect to ever have it or get there? Clarify your goals and dreams today!” Rex Sikes

This is YOUR day!

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Acceptance, Affirmations, Attitude, Blessings, Celebration, Emotions, Focus, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Happiness, Learning, Overcoming Difficulty, Persistence, Positive Thinking, Responsibility

Do This When Frustrated, Angry or Feeling Bad!

May 15, 2015 rexsikes 1 Comment

“How can you tell if you are focused on what you don’t want or what you do want? It is actually easy. Your have a signaling system that you can use. It alerts you when you are on or off track. You only need to learn how to recognize it to use it. It requires is becoming aware.

Your Feelings Are Your Signal System

If you are frustrated it is a signal you are focused on what you do not want. Negative emotion is the signal you are focused on what you don’t want. When you are feeling good and have positive emotions it is a signal you are focused on what you want.

Negative emotion only means you are thinking about what you do not want. Whatever you are thinking about mostly is what you get more of. You create the conditions of your life experience. You manifest more of the same. What you think about you become.

If you are frustrated, angry, depressed, anxious, worried, fearful, blaming and accusing, whining and complaining you are spending time and energy in a less than glorious place. The feelings that cause you to blame or complain are the signal.

If you catch yourself criticizing and speaking poorly about self, others, events and situations that is a signal. A clue you are focused in less than productive ways on what you do not want.

Once you become aware you are feeling negative, feeling frustrated, and you don’t like feeling that way you can do two things. First, you can get more frustrated, and more angry, you can get more intensely negative to the point where you think and say and commit to yourself, ‘never again!’ You can ramp it up and get to that ‘this is the last straw’ point. From this point you can make changes you need to.

That is one way of dealing with it. It can and does occur naturally for people. They just get to the point where they know they have to change. That intense emotion is fine as long as it serves to take them to a place where they stop focusing on the negative and begin focusing on the positive.

The negative feelings are the signal you are not focusing on what you want. However, if you don’t change your focus to what you do want you won’t have the relief or get the results you hope for. You must wake up, pay attention to the signal and change what you are doing.

You must switch your attention. THAT IS WHAT your feelings have been trying to get you to do. You feelings are trying to GET YOUR ATTENTION enough for you to notice so you can SWITCH!

Remember, if you always do what you always did you always get what you always got. It is an opportunity to be productively different.

Clarify What You Do Want

Use the powerful negative feelings to figure out what it is you do want. Stop focusing on the negative and start focusing on the positive. Commit to staying focused on the positive. Whenever you feel negative there is an adjustment you should make. That IS the signal you are off course.

You have an internal guidance system. You have an internal GPS. You have a system designed to be self correcting. The unwanted thoughts and feelings inform you that you are off course. Don’t fight them, celebrate when you recognize the signal and make the necessary changes. Less than glorious means time to change!

Some people have spent so many years ignoring or fighting and pushing down and repressing their feelings they have difficulty telling when they are feeling good or less than glorious. Still, you can learn to pay attention and benefit from this internal guidance bit by bit, Awareness is your key! It may be more subtle but you can do it.

Commit to paying attention. Do a self inventory frequently though out the day by asking ‘how am I feeling’ . Take a moment to evaluate and be honest. It is useful to color chart your feelings using crayon or markers to indicate the changes during the day.

Notice predominant colors and notice how frequently you actually fluctuate. This is a great learning tool Give it a shot and you may surprise yourself.

You can ask someone to assist you by pointing out when you are acting in certain ways. Just don’t bite their head off when they help. The goal is to become aware when you are feeling less than glorious so you can change direction.

Second, Make Incremental Change

You change from bad to a little bit better. Step by step. The goal is to feel a bit better. Actually, the goal is to feel the best you can most of the time, but if you are intensely down or angry going from that place to joyous is too big a leap.

Going from angry to frustrated is a smaller step and a worthwhile one. You are learning to lessen the anger and move away from it.

People either get frustrated and then angry or they can get angry and cool off to frustrated. It is like a gate that can move in either direction. A swinging door. So when you are really mad the goal is to cool off and begin to think of what you do want.

If you are down you want to get to a bit better place. A place more okay and begin thinking about what you do want. If you are depressed you may want to get frustrated and angry. At least, from angry you can act.

Because it is intense you create more movement. From there you can more readily change. Regardless, one needs to get to a place where ‘enough is enough’ and then make positive productive change.

What you want makes you feel good when you think about it. If when think about what you want you feel bad you aren’ t thinking about what you do want. You probably are thinking about how you don’t have what you do want.

You won’t feel good if you compare where you are to where you want to be unless you are celebrating closing the gap. If as you inch your way forward you are delighted the entire time then it is fine.

Gratitude Helps Make Everything Better

If you celebrate everything you are on the right track and you will feel better more of the time. How can you feel down and out, frustrated, angry or bored when you are thankful and happy and delighted about everything? You can’t!

Find every little thing you can to enjoy, and appreciate. The more you find the better you will feel.

Once you make gratitude and celebration a daily habit you will be thinking and feeling good most of the time. You will be much closer to making your dreams come true as you live this way. Then your head and heart is clear to find more opportunity and advantages each day. You are better equipped to handle obstacles, and disappointment. You are far more resilient and resourceful!

When you live in gratitude and celebration everything is incredible and getting better at the same time. It is one of the wisest and most powerful choices you can make. Celebrate everything, even the tough stuff! Look for the silver lining and emphasize it. Never waste an opportunity to feel grand!” Rex Sikes

Enjoy today!

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