Forget Your Weaknesses: Develop Your Strengths!
“If you learned you need to get better at what you are poor at you learned wrong. If your parents or teachers or anyone told you to develop and work on your weaknesses they were incorrect. You could spend a lot of time devoted to what you aren’t good at and be wasting a lot of your time!
Stop! Make a change that will bring you better results and greater satisfaction. Work on and develop your strengths! Take what you are good at and get great at it! This makes the most sense. This will get you the best result for your efforts.
Your Strengths Give You The Edge
Take your talents to the next level and the level after that. Your strengths are what you should be furthering. Who knows how far you could go if you focused on making your best even better?
Developing your weaknesses sounds good but if you suck at something how long will it take until you are mediocre at it? Meanwhile, the best you got is languishing. It is silly to let your best go to waste while you focus on what you are the least good at.
Remember, what you focus on expands. What you think about most you become. What you put out there comes back to you. SO why spend all your time putting energy into what you aren’t very good at?
Put Your Energy Into Where You Are Good And Excel!
Emphasize and spend time with all that is the best of you. Think about what you are good at rather than what you aren’t good at. Focus on your strengths and develop those. Your strong points give you the edge your weaknesses won’t.
If you are bad at something and you keep trying to get better at it its more apt to break your confidence and crush your spirit. Build up your wins, feel the best, and live from where you are strong.
It makes sense if you are socially inept, if you aren’t able to communicate well; if you can not look another person in the eye and talk to them than yes, you should develop your skills to be able to do so. One of the best ways you do that is to develop your confidence.
Focusing On Your Best Develops Your Confidence
How do you develop confidence? You develop your confidence by making your best better. You feel confident when you take stock of and keep in mind what you are good at; you remember your talents and abilities. Confidence comes from winning and excelling.
It is wiser to start at the top and go higher than to begin at the bottom and work your way up to the middle. Skyrocket don’t struggle.
Be confident while staying humble. Bragging isn’t real confidence it is based in fear. When you really are good you know it you don’t have to prove it.
In your career, your occupation, your job, even your school you can bet you will be rewarded with a promotion or a raise or an honorable notice for what you are best at not what you suck at. Put your best foot forward not your worst. Develop your skills and abilities. You will be glad you did!” Rex Sikes
It is your day to make what you will of it!
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Do This: Whenever You Are Frustrated. When It Just Isn’t Happening!
“Why are you frustrated? You don’t seem to be making headway fast enough? You probably hate it when someone says, ‘relax. Be patient.’ You don’t want patience right, you want your efforts to pay off now! Don’t you?
That, wanting, that desire, that insisting, THAT IS your suffering.
You are trying to push a rope. You are trying to force the process. You are trying to make water boil faster and you just can’t. Instead of relaxing and letting go you are getting hot. You do need to be patient and that makes it all the more difficult, doesn’t it?
You are split. You want it, it isn’t working. You know you shouldn’t feel this way but you do. You go back and forth, you can’t make it hurry and you are in a hurry. You are divided. Bouncing back and forth as if off walls. Guess what? You really CAN’T force it.
You do have to relax and wait. SO you might as well learn how to.
If you don’t know relaxation methods you should. Learn them when you don’t need them or when you do. Just take sometime and learn to relax, let go and enjoy life in spite of everything. Learn the value and importance of taking a break, a vacation from your woes. Listen to relaxation mp3s online or CDs. Take a class.
Go somewhere nice for a few days. Enjoy something. Actually take your mind off it. Meditate, go work out, work in the garden. Walk. But take a well needed, well deserved break. Seek to develop the abilities to accept, to let go, to relax and to be patient.
Those who are truly successful know what they can and can’t control. If they can’t control time then they use their time to feel better. The unsuccessful use their time to feel worse. Which do you want to be?
Go golfing, swimming, camping. Engage in a hobby. Have some fun. Let go. Successful people take out their yacht, their Porsche. They do anything to take a break. They aren’t going to let themselves feel frustrated when there are better feelings to enjoy!
You can be, do and have anything you want in life when you first determine what it is you want. Then you passionately let it consume you and you pursue it with persistence. You don’t quit until you have it.
You can transform yourself into a relaxed, successful person with a winning attitude and winning behaviors by beginning to imagine yourself as that kind of person, if you aren’t already.
Go back through my blog site and read and review my posts on how to become who you want to become. Learn to do what you want to be able to do. Find out how to get whatever it is you what to have.
Patience is your attitude and behavior while you wait. It is what you think and do in the meantime. It defines who you are. Patience means you are waiting for an expected outcome.
Imagine how different people were a couple centuries ago. There was no instant on anything, no high speed internet, no jet travel, no microwaves. Whatever time it took, took the time it took to complete.
People had to wait for water to boil; it took time to build a fire and warm the house. Trips took however long they took by horse, ship, and eventually by rail. To cross the ocean or the country you live in took a long time. You couldn’t be in too much of a rush if things too weeks and months. My guess is they were qualitatively different than we are today.
For everything there is a season. Farmers planted and harvested in whatever time it took. They grew up used to waiting. Waiting was a big part of life. Mail took a long time. Communication and change was slow. There was no emergency medicine as we know it. No 911 responders.
People had a much different relationship to time. My guess is that they were less in a hurry than modern people because they grew up waiting for many things. Either you got used to it as a life style or you suffered. BUT they also didn’t have any difference to compare it to.
Those who have grown up with instant access, drive-up banking, microwaves, high speed this and that, the media and advertisers’ promise of faster, quicker, overnight, you can have it yesterday magic pills and silver bullets, get frustrated when things take time.
We think everything should be quicker, easier, take no effort, take no time AND be better. Our thoughts determine what we experience. We don’t have the same quality of patience as the people who lived long ago. We need to think the thoughts that serve us better. Our thoughts are what we can control!
That farmer, back then, planted and expected to harvest a crop. Sometimes the weather or conditions changed and crops failed, Sometime they were more bountiful but either way that farmer planted, WAITED and EXPECTED to harvest. It took all the required time it took. He had to do other things in the meantime!
Wait and see meant wait and see.
Patience requires faith. In faith you wait for what you believe will happen, what you know will happen. You wait for what you expect to happen. After all you expect the sun to come up tomorrow. It is a given. You expect the Christmas holiday madness near the end of each year. These are givens!
If you chose to take a pleasure cruise across the seas you expect to get to your destination. You don’t doubt that you will get there, although anything is possible. You have faith that you will arrive when you arrive. So you can relax and enjoy the journey.
When it comes to making our dreams come true and accomplishing our goals patience is required. We plant the seeds, we think about it day and night, we visualize, we affirm, we work our plan and we wait.
How we wait is important. Either you are patient and expect good things or you are frustrated, tense, hurried and frazzled.
If we are patient we know it is happening. It is coming there is no question about that. It’s a given! The time doesn’t matter because we have put it into motion. We are initiators. We are creators. We make things happen. It will happen, we know it, it is just a matter of when. We have faith.
Yes, that may be tougher today because of our modern conveniences and our relationship to time but patience is still required. It is an attribute or characteristic that serves us well.
We shouldn’t be making excuses and whining and complaining and blaming others or the era we are born into. We should be cultivating winning behaviors and attitudes that make our success and happiness more likely.
You don’t cultivate new thoughts and behaviors thinking and doing the old ones repeatedly. We must change our thoughts and behaviors if we want changes in our lives. We must develop those areas that help us reliably get what we want.
We need to exercise our positivity, our faith, our patience and our persistence. We must commit to excellence.
We must wait expecting the positive outcome. We can’t dig the seeds up and check. We must not let out circumstances convince us that anything but the outcome we want, or better, is on the horizon.
If we give in to worry, doubt, fear, we undo our efforts. We get mixed results. We take a step forward and then backwards. We get caught up. Then we don’t have faith, patience or positive expectations. We are frustrated. You don’t move forward quickly if you undo each forward step you take.
We are looking at the wrong things. We are looking at results we created previously that are presently manifesting while the new results are growing in darkness. Keep your faith no matter what.
In order to get what we want we must remain laser like focused. We must rest assured. We must be convinced. We must know in our heart we have done the necessary work (when we actually have) and now it is only a matter of time. AND we continue to do whatever is necessary; we continue to have faith and wait expectantly.
How do we live in the meantime? We celebrate, we enjoy, we live in the present to the fullest. We delight and are thankful and live with true gratitude. We let every moment fill us. When there are obstacles we overcome them by utilizing our personal resourcefulness. We have a winning attitude! We know how to relax too.
We live with passion, we live in this moment knowing good things are coming in the future. We know that what we have put in motion and what we keep in motion will be ours soon enough. We know the garden we planted in time will bloom. We nurture it along and enjoy where we are now at. This is a great way to live!” Rex Sikes
Enjoy and have fun today!
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Are You Ready To Transform Your HoHum Life Into A More Positive, Successful, Rewarding One?
“You would never think to put anything but the right fuel in the gas tank of your car, would you? Oddly, some people treat their cars and boats and planes better than they do themselves.
What You Feed Yourself Is Important
What you put into your system either nourishes you, builds you up, adds to your health or it does not. If you eat the right healthy food choices you can expect to be healthier than if you eat junk food and empty calories.
When you eat right you feel better, think better, behave better because you have provided your body the proper fuel it needs to go about its tasks. This principle not only applies to your physical health but your mental, emotional, spiritual and social health as well.
What You Focus On Is What You Get
Whatever you fill your mind with will be reflected in your attitude and in the life you live. If your current circumstances aren’t everything you want them to be then it is a sure bet you aren’t maintaining a healthy diet in one or more of these important areas.
If you want an incredible fulfilled life then you must provide your mind, heart and spirit with the proper nutritious fuel. You can’t become rich focusing on lack. You won’t be a success if you are concerned with defeat. You will not be happy if you are worried all the time.
Here is what you must do if you want your life to be more positive, more successful and much more rewarding.
Spend Time Each Day Consuming Positive Reading Material
It isn’t how much your read it is how much time you spend reading that is important. The longer you spend the more you benefit. Some people will complain they have no time. Then read at least a page or two from some excellent inspiring material daily.
Listen To Inspirational And Motivational Speakers
Listen to thought leaders who can help move you in positive ways. Fill your mind and your time with positive messages that lift you up and encourage you. Whenever you drive is an excellent time for listening.
Surround Yourself With Positive Friends
Keep company with positive people and influences who lift you up and move you forward. Eliminate those messages and media influences that are negative. Reduce the amount of time you spend with friends who whine, complain, gossip and bring you down.
Evaluate These
Who do you listen to? What do you read? How much time do you spend each day devoted to your mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, wealth and social well-being? Are you nurturing yourself?
Are you developing and enhancing positive relationships with family, friends, co-workers and love interests? Are you building your bank account and making your dreams come true?
How Are You Spending The Bulk Of Your Time?
Is it invested in you or in distractions and limitations? Are you watching television for hours on end, gaming, spending time on social media?
Are you filling yourself with positive inspiring news or news on how everything is falling apart and sucks? Are you predominantly positive or predominantly negative? What occupies your focus and attention most of the time? To what do you give your energy?
If you are what you eat you also are what you think and what you do. You are known by the company you keep. Your actions speak louder than words. If garbage goes into the system garbagewill come out of the system. This is known as the Principle Of GIGO.
You know how they train animals to behave, don’t you? Repetition and conditioning is the key. They use positive reinforcement as a system of rewards.
Research has determined the best way to extinguish an unwanted behavior in animals and humans is to ignore it. Do not draw attention to it. Let it go. Instead, reward the behaviors you want to flourish. Repeat the behaviors you want to make habitual and automatic. Practice makes permanent.
Successful People Are Conditioned For Success
They learn from birth on because they have the right parents, or they get training and mentoring, or they stumble into it eventually through trial and error. Howeverthey come by it they live and think differently than those who are not successful.
Successful people follow patterns for success. The repeat the patterns again and again making corrections and adjustments as necessary. In going through this process they condition themselves for success. Wash, rinse, repeat. Practice makes permanent.
Don’t Get Caught Up In The Negative
Successful people don’t get caught in the negative but encourage patterns that work. Any great athletic, business or life coach knows this too. Place the emphasis on what you want not on what you don’t want because you get back what you focus on. They know that what you think about you become. Affirm what you want!
People who are not successful and who have difficulty in life repeat patterns of defeat. The wash, rinse and repeat that which does not work and that brings them down. The have habits that do not serve to make them happy, healthy or wealthy. Their habits make them miserable and keep them poor.
Successful People Utilize Positive Intentional Thinking
You can too. Focus on what you want, what you intend to create, what you intend to be, do or have and let the other stuff go. Remember, whatever you put your attention on grows in importance. What you think about you bring about!
Keep your attention off the negative, off the worry, off the fear, the doubts and anxiety. Keep it off comparisons to others, the blaming, whining, criticizing and making excuses. Keep talk and self-talk positive!
Focus On What You Want
Focus on the positive, the healthy, the nourishing good food and fuel for your mind, heart, spirit, and body. Then you will become what you want to be, do what you want to do and have what you want to have. What you think about you bring about.
What consumes the mind and fills the heart is what you get back in return. Fill yourself with celebration. Be grateful for whatever you have and whomever is in your life. Be filled with gratitude for everything and you will live a joyous life! Smile frequently!
The more time you fill with positive, productive, successful practices and people the more you will transform your life.
Intentionally choose your positive thoughts and fully express gratitude and celebration. The more you enjoy these positive feelings the quicker and easier you will find delight and joy and transform your experience from ho-hum to absolutely incredible. Don’t wait, begin today!” Rex Sikes
Be thrilled today!
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Accidents Happen And Boy When They Do
“It turns out the universe wants me to slow down. This morning, I was exiting the house, keys in hand on my way to a meeting, focused on hitting the button on the keys to open the car when I hit an uneven spot in the walkway and was pitched headfirst into my car.
I slammed into the car, my left knee hitting the pavement, my right foot twisting and turning under me as I fell on it. I got up slowly, it was difficult, my knee scraped and bleeding, my right foot sore. My wrists and forehead worse for wear but ok. I laughed, ‘what was that?’
I hobbled around looking for my keys. Took about 10 minutes when I noticed them about 20 feet away in the driveway in front of the car. Onto my meeting I went, sore but okay. I laughed it off at the meeting and had a most wonderful, marvelous meeting of new beginnings in many ways. Many new doors opened right then.
In olden by gone days I would have sworn, complained, wondered what I had done to cause this, or wondered why I had crappy luck. I would have been miserable. I would have poisoned the pot with negative self-talk, criticisms and negative questions.
Today, I could only think, ‘This is a blessing! Wow, something good is going to come of this. I wonder what it might be. I have no clue. Surprise me.’ It was automatic.
As we were leaving the meeting I took my foot our of my shoe to see if it had swollen and stepped down onto the pavement and that was it. WOW! The pain was unbelievable. Up until then everything was fine, pretty much. I still had errands to run but now I was seriously hobbled and in a lot of pain.
I did them. I limped around doing errands the pain increasing all the while! I drove home. I barely made it into the house and into a recliner. Eventually, I called my daughter and asked if she could take me to urgent care. She came by and she did. What an angel. We got to urgent care about 4 hours after the injury.
At Urgent Care I passed out twice. I don’t recall it but so I am told. I nearly puked. I was hot and sweating. Apparently, I had spent too much time on the injury.
They x-rayed my foot eventually and gave me a diagnosis. The pain grew and grew. They wheeled me from room to room. They were very caring. Finally, they left my daughter and I alone in a room together.
I looked at my daughter and realized I was exhibiting pain in front of her all the while. She was watching Dad suffer. This isn’t a bad thing we all can hurt. Pain is a natural response.
However, recently I have been trying to tell her you can handle tough times, you can get through the pain, it too will pass and here I am passing out from it. I was not the example I hoped I would be. She, of course, already does know everything I am trying to ‘teach’ her. That’s the kind of person she is! Amazing.
I looked at her and focused on her. Inside I thought, ‘it is only pain’. I focused on my daughter, I kept that thought in mind and looked at her and my heart filled with love. Within minutes I knew I could handle the pain. We were smiling. It was wonderful.
During all of this time, from the accident onward, I kept thinking inside, ‘Wow, something good is coming my way, I have no idea what but something incredible is coming’.
I believe it too. I know it is. I began to say it out loud so she would know what I was thinking. ‘There is a blessing in all of this!, Something good will come of this.’ ‘I don’t know what yet, but it is a blessing.’
Speaking it out loud has its own power. It makes it more real too. AND I wasn’t lecturing I was just Dad talking to himself. I was affirming what I knew to be true and she was hearing me and seeing me. Even in crisis any of us can be resourceful. Everything can be a blessing if we only choose to see it that way!
If ever there is a strong, incredibly resilient person it is my daughter. She truly is my teacher as is my son. From the moment they were each born I committed to being the best guide I could be on our journey together.
I promised to love them no matter what. I also knew deep in my soul they would teach me more about parenting than I could ever teach them about growing up. I am the luckiest guy on earth with such incredible children.
Okay, so I know something about pain management and have practiced it for decades. I have taught pain control in workshops and seminars in various locations around the world. People have flow thousands of miles to spend days, weeks and months with me in seminars and live training.
Yet, in the heat of the moment I was caught up in the hurt.
I closed my eyes put my head back and began to think and ask myself, ‘what part of my body feels the very best?’ ‘In how many different ways can I discover myself feeling wonderful?’ ‘What is the best feeling I can find right now?’
‘Where does it feel wonderful? In how many different ways can I discover all the places in my body that feel good?’ I sent my brain on a search by asking questions and it delivered.
I used Directed Questions™ to direct my mind to what were the best feelings I could find. I found them and began feeling those! I began to experience relief. I was beginning to pay attention to what felt good instead of what felt bad. I was looking for what was right instead of what was wrong. I was finding it too.
My mind was attending to what felt the best. It was searching for the ways in which this incident was a blessing right now, in this moment, AND in the future with many good things coming my way. My daughter was here, we were together, she was helping me. This moment IS a perfect moment.
We were blessed in this way right in this moment! The moment was unfolding. It wasn’t just a blessing and an opportunity for the future it was a blessing right now. How lucky we were to be sharing this moment! An accident brought us this realization. How marvelous is that?
I had steered away from the pain back into the positive. You have read this or heard this from me before if you follow my blog or the materials I have shared for decades. I navigated to the more productive. I didn’t resist the pain or try to stop it. I looked for what was better. I dropped the pain and enjoyed feeling wonderful.
Yes, it really hurt but it began to subside. It became manageable. Yes, it was very painful when they manipulated my foot on the x-ray bed, or tried on various braces but as long as I realized ‘it’s only pain’ and allowed myself to be filled with wonder and enjoyed my awesome daughter I could handle it. Hours went by.
I told my daughter that looking at her helped me. I enjoyed and loved her and was feeling relief. Eventually, they found a brace that fit, gave me prescription for an MRI. Surgery may be required. Okay, so now some focus on healing swiftly may be the order of the coming days.
Right now, she is out running errands for us. Picking up food, etc. I am at home with my leg elevated and ice on it. I am fine. Does it hurt, sure but I am at ease with it. I have let go of the hurting and am focused on the miracles in life.
Everything is grand. I decided to share my thoughts while I had time during the day rather than my early morning writing schedule.
Another lesson I learned is: I should pay attention when I walk. Not be caught up in things. I used to practice ‘Zen Walking’, when walking just walk, the basis of Zen – be the activity and nothing more.
If you are going to wash the dish, wash the dish. If you are going to eat, just eat. No distractions, no TV, no phone or reading, just eat. Be one with the moment!
I had much on my mind. Slow down. One thing at a time. It may not need to be a rule but it can certainly be a lesson. I was inattentive walking to the car. Perhaps, I can use this lesson to remember to be more aware and alert when doing any number of things. A reminder to be aware! How marvelous is that?
I certainly remembered I didn’t have to be a victim to the pain. My first thoughts of pain added to what I was feeling. It made it worse. Once, I changed my thinking the pain lessened. I mean it really lessened!
I am not surprised because I teach this stuff. I know it works. I emphasize this because I was caught up in the hurting at first. Once I realized that, during everything that was going, and I utilized what I know works. It did. It worked! It worked quickly and powerfully. I could share other examples from my past but I won’t at this time.
On top of it my daughter is a marvelous nurse. She picked up delicious ‘OH SO GOOD’ authentic East Indian food from a friend who makes great dishes from her native land. We are having a feast. I am sampling while typing. Yes, very marvelous indeed!
I would never have received this delicious Indian dinner today. PLUS, as a result, I learned about a fantastic Indian Restaurant in my neighbor I didn’t know existed!!! Blessings come in all shapes and sizes.
I feel loved, cared for and grateful to have had this experience and to have such an incredible daughter. Thanks my darling! I’m a lucky Daddy!
I will have to slow down and take it easy for awhile. I have crutches and a brace and have been told to see the follow up doctors as soon as possible. Okay, I can do that. Tonight, I will relax, read some inspiring material and chill out feeling grateful.
All in all the events of the day, while not something I would have picked for myself, have been amazing. I have learned much and feel so loved and grateful. Something incredible has already come my way and I know more is on the horizon. Lucky Me!” Rex Sikes
How many blessings will you discover today? I wonder?!
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Who Is Your Boss? Who Runs The Show?
“Who is your Boss? The Boss runs the show. Are you the Boss of your own life? Many of us like to think we are? But are we? Who is running the show in your life? If you aren’t the Boss you can bet someone or something else is. They could care less about you!
Be The Boss Of Your Own Life
Whatever distracts you from creating your life as you want it; whatever distracts you from maintaining your positive attitude; whatever distracts you from moving towards accomplishing your goals each day IS your Boss.
Whatever the limitation that prevents you from pursuing your dreams and making them happens is the Boss. This Boss controls your time, your output, your results, and your rewards. This Boss controls you.
If your watching TV, going out for cocktails, hanging with the boys or the girls or gaming instead of working towards what you want you then these distractions are your Boss. These distractions are preventing you from the success and happiness you want and deserve.
Your Habits Determine Who The Boss Is
Instead of doing what you can be doing to have a better life you let whims dictate how your life will be. If you aren’t in charge of yourself then your poor habits will be in charge of you. Others run the show. You won’t benefit by their control. You will lose out.
In order to win you have to run the race. You can’t quit or get distracted by something on the sidelines. You must focus on the prize, pace yourself and do your very best. Less than that means it is likely you won’t finish first.
Don’t let comparisons stop you either. Don’t let imitation thinking prevent you from giving it your all. There are always stronger, faster, richer, smarter, better looking competitors who seem to have every advantage but you can’t let that dissuade you. They can lose too.
Slow And Steady Wins The Race
Remember, the fable of the tortoise and the hare. The hare had speed and was confident he would take the prize. So over confident, in fact, he took a nap near the finish line. Hubris did the rabbit in.
The tortoise kept a diligent steady pace, did not stop but kept on going. Slow and steady he won the race. The rabbit awoke to watch the hare cross the finish line. The tortoise was in control.
Be the Boss of your thought and of your own habits. Control your time, energy, and attention. Commit to winning the prize and to nothing else. If you go about it sloppily and half-assed you aren’t going to get there anytime soon.
Do not give away your power to others, to activities, to things or to places that do not benefit you in the long term. Stop wasting time with and limitations distractions. Decide how to best spend your time to live the life you want.
Limit Distractions And Unproductive Behaviors
Avoid negative media messages that bring your down. Avoid people who just aren’t productive for you to be around. Learn to say NO to those elements which don’t lift you up or move you forward. Value yourself, your time and your dreams.
Whining, complaining, making excuses, rationalizing, are all distractions. These do not get you any closer to making your dreams come true. Only think and speak that which blesses, heals and prospers you and others.
Stop! Don’t let your negative thoughts be your Boss. Don’t let limited, ‘I Can’t Do It’ thinking prevent you from trying and making it. BE the Boss of your thoughts and behaviors. BE an ‘I Can Do It’ person.
Keep Your Power Use Your Powers
Set your mindset and attitude to positive. When your thoughts and desires are aligned, and you congruently feel good and optimistic about getting your goals, things go easier.
You work smarter, not necessarily harder. You are more resourceful. Your time is spent on productive activity. You feel wonderful and you see opportunity more readily.
You handle challenges more easily. Everything is better when you are in charge positively! Be your own Boss and make your dreams come true!” Rex Sikes
You have another beautiful day to make the most of!
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Haven’t You Been A Loser Long Enough? Do This To Win!
“Are you dissatisfied with the results you have been getting? Are you unhappy with where you are at? Maybe things are mostly okay but you seem stuck? You want to advance but you aren’t moving ahead quick enough? There is something you can do.
I don’t like the term positive thinking because it has been misunderstood by too many. Some people just don’t get what it is about because there are those who have stated that it is wishful thinking, hoping, and unrealistic dreaming. I disagree. So I prefer to call it Intentional Thinking.
Intentional Thinking Means You Choose Your Thoughts
You are in charge. You are the decision maker. It is pretty easy to know whether or not you are doing it correctly. Either you are thinking what you intend to or you are not. Your thoughts are either positive and productive or negative and not. You either feel like a winner or like a loser. If you are losing you can change that.
It’s your choice. You are not your thoughts! You think thoughts! Thoughts come from everywhere. Much of the thoughts we think and the thought paths we go down are a result of others; people in authority, peers, the media, some we generate on our own but most of our thinking we adopt or adapt from the outside.
Rather than being victim of unwanted thoughts or thought patterns I recommend you choose what you want to think. You are bigger than the thoughts in your head and the ones you speak so you should be in charge. Sadly, many people are not. They let all these other people’s thoughts dictate how their life will be.
On top of that they have routine, habitual thoughts. They spend time thinking thoughts of sadness, worry, defeat, failure, negativity, blaming, whining, excusing. Their lives reflect their mental attitude too. They lose, they worry they will lose. They try to avoid losing. They fear they don’t have enough, won’t be enough and aren’t enough.
It is simple. Your thoughts either inspire or fatigue you. They either motivate you or scare you. They are either positive or negative. They either move you closer to your goal, keep you stuck, or move you further away. Just as in football the ball is either advancing toward the goal line or it is not.
Break The Loser Mentality Cycle
You choose! That is the one power you are assured of in this life. You can choose your thoughts. While it may seem difficult due to years of habitual defeatist thinking choosing your thoughts IS the one power you definitely have. Either you choose your thoughts or they are choosing you. So what is it going to be?
Are you thinking what serves you? Are you thinking thoughts that make your life better? Either you are or you aren’t? Are you thinking what you intend to think? Are you moving yourself down the field closer to your goal? If yes, fantastic! If no, then you must change something you are doing. You must change what you think and are focused on.
Thoughts flock together just like birds. One negative thought produces so many others. Our brains work by association and one idea leads to another. Soon we are swept up in a whirlwind of less than glorious thoughts that produce less than glorious feelings at the same time. We think poorly and feel poorly. Woe is me!
You have to break the cycle. One positive intentional thought you produce will lead to a flock of other positive thoughts. However, if your thinking has been routinely, habitually less than glorious, haphazard and unintentional, you have to stick with it and guide your thoughts. You have to be the chooser for awhile.
Choose: Become Aware Of Your Productive Thoughts
You have to be aware and deliberately choose the positive thoughts you want to keep and ignore or eliminate the negative ones that drag you down. You have to overcome the routine doubts, worry or fear that you have tolerated and accepted as your reality for so long.
The negative thoughts will persist for awhile. Why? Because that is what you have been habitually doing. You need to develop a new productive, positive habit. Don’t worry (worry is the old way) you will succeed as you persist. Set your course and determine to get there!
Commit to staying as positive as you can. Step by step. Even when the negative thoughts rear their ugly head you can overcome them by staying the course. Don’t be tricked or deceived! Don’t give in or give up. Remember, drop by drop the tub gets filled. Little by little you will make headway
If you fall off the horse get right back on. Focus your attention on being positive. Accept only the thoughts you INTEND! Be deliberate! Choose what you want to focus on. Bring your attention and energy only to what you want. Let go of the thoughts that don’t serve you. Give up the old unproductive ways and pursue the new.
While it seems difficult at first, the good news is, it gets easier and easier. Once you start choosing you discover the power in your choice. When you accept responsibility, 100% responsibility, for all your thoughts you step into your power. Ultimately, the new way becomes a habit and automated.
You are no longer a victim, you no longer drift haphazardly like a cork floating on the water but you move because of your own volition. You take charge of your thinking and your feeling and you claim your mind, body and life back. You determine how things will be. You exercise your power because you discover your power.
What You Get And What You Got Has Always Been Up To You
In case it hasn’t already occurred to you – you are already a powerful creator. You are 100% responsible for your life conditions as they currently are. Sure, you can blame it on others, or the economy, or god, or whatever but what has that gotten you so far. It certainly hasn’t and won’t change anything BUT YOU can!
Do you have what you want?
Is it mostly, somewhat or not even close to the life you would choose for yourself? If you don’t like your current lifeYOU CAN change it. You created this one, unintentionally perhaps, now create the one you intend to create. Create the life you want! You should be living the life you intend to live!
If you want to know how to take charge read through all these blog posts again. If you haven’t already start at the beginning. Go back and re-read as many times as you can, days and weeks apart because you will discover new things each time you revisit these materials.
Read Napoleon Hill, Wallace Wattles and others whose works, along with ancient texts, stand the proof of time. Do something in your own best interests. Be your own best friend and do that which will help you feel the way you want, be the way you want, and have what you want! Fill your mind with the positive thoughts you want!
Attitude Determines Your Altitude
If you are unhappy with the outside world. If you don’t like the results you have been getting then you must change your thinking. You can’t change the outside world until you first change your inside world. It begins with you!
Once YOU develop a powerful, positive, habitual attitude and mindset you can influence the outer world in amazing ways. You can begin to get the results you want in the world. It begins within you! You begin to create and shape and influence the world. Whatever the world gives you you make better!
This moment the decision is yours! What will you commit to? Either you remain a victim of unintended, haphazard, wishy washy or mostly negative thinking or you chose to become a power house who goes after and gets your dreams and goals.
Either You Transform Your Life Or You Don’t
You either transform your life or you don’t. No one will do it for you. The world isn’t going to change for you. Either you do it now or you wait some more. I can promise you this, you have already waited long enough. Some day just never comes.
Either you take control in this moment or you don’t. You are either positive or negative. You are in control or you are being controlled. Which will you live with? What will you do? Right now you are getting exactly what you you want or don’t want.
Your life is already a reflection of your thinking. How and what you have been thinking has brought you where you are in the world today. What you think from this day forward will determine where you are next.
You can’t escape your thoughts. You are either the captain of your ship or you are passenger being taken for a ride. Which do you want to be? Your choice. You can begin today a entirely new wonderful way to live. So won’t you? Do it now! ” Rex Sikes
Transform your day into something miraculous!
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Are You Headed In The Wrong Direction? How You Can Tell!
“How can you tell if you are moving in the right direction? Why is being focused on what you want such an issue? How come you can’t focus on what you don’t want or nothing at all? What about luck? Isn’t it possible to make it without all this positive mind thinking stuff?
Some people think this way. They have reasons for not thinking positive. They want to do it their way. If they are getting the results they want to get and are happy with their lives more power to them. I have no argument with that.
The Issue Is What You Focus On
The problem for most of us is this. If you think, ‘I hate it here’ that thought doesn’t tell you where else would be better. It only keeps you locked into what is uncomfortable. It focuses you on what you do not like now.
It doesn’t help you to see what might be better now or in the future. It gets you no closer to your goals nor does it provide any direction for you to get them. If you are focused on what you don’t want you are not headed in the right direction.
When you catch yourself doing this, ask yourself, ‘where else would I rather be?’ Then focus on the answer you get. Discover your destination. Choose it! Then you can ask ‘why do I want to be there? ‘or ‘why do I want this?’ and that will help get you the reasons and the motivations. (more on the power of why in a future blog post).
If you ask, ‘how can I get there’ you may get the answer or you may not know it yet. That is okay. Ultimately, you will develop a plan. Knowing where you want to be and why are actually a very good start. It gives you direction and reasons for moving ahead.
Brains Target Results – Learn To Use This
Brains move in a direction. Your mind moves in a direction. It targets and goes after what you want if you train it to go after what you want. Otherwise, it will go after whatever has the highest emotional signal value. Whatever you think about most during your day.
If what you don’t want looms up in front of you and you intensely react with fear or loathing your brain will get it for you. It doesn’t know not to. It understands powerful images and feelings. It targets them and works to get more of them.
If on the other hand what you want is powerful and you feel intensely good feelings it will go after that. It doesn’t know not to because it targets based on what you hold in your mind and what you intensely feel.
The cool part is being positive and feeling positive feels better for you. SO you get what you want while enjoying the feelings. This is reason enough to think positive, don’t you think?
However, if you go back and forth you get mixed results. If you want it but doubt it your brain starts and stops. You focus on what you want and then don’t want, then want, your brain tries to give you each and you end up stuck with poor results. You have to choose!
If You Do Nothing Nothing Will Change
You can hope you get there. You can wish. You can wait for something to change. You can rely on luck to help out. You could do nothing at all and remain where you are ‘hating it’, OR you can decide what you want is to not be stuck and do whatever it takes to travel to where you want. You must decide!
You know what you didn’t want. You knew what you hated. This provided the impetus for you to change. The bad thoughts and feelings alerted you that you were in a place you did not want to be.
If you use these feelings correctly they help you to clarify what you DO want so you can move away from what you hate and begin getting what you want. It helps you moved from stuck to action.
Clarify And Visualize What You Want
Now stay focused on what it is you want. Imagine what you want clearly in your mind’s eye, in your mental movie theater. See it as if you already have what you want. Imagine how good this feels. Stay with the feelings. Emphasize them. Allow them to grow. Really feel them!
See it as vividly as you can. Imagine looking out through your own eyes and seeing this world from your point of view. You are living your dreams. You have what you want. What are you seeing? What are you hearing? What are you feeling? What are you experiencing?
How To Target And Visualize
As an example, if you imagined yourself in a new home. What does it feel like to live there? What’s it like to walk from room to room? What do you see? How are the rooms decorated and furnished? This is your home see it in detail. Inside and outside? What kind of car is in the driveway? What’s the landscaping like? Who lives there with you?
Imagine what you say to yourself when you have what you want, what do you hear? Enjoy all these incredible feelings? Perhaps, there are smells associated with this home, enjoy them. Make it as real as possible as if you can reach out and touch it.
Use Affirmations Keep It Positive
Affirm this! Keep your self-talk positive? See this in your mind again and again. What we are consumed with we create. What we think about we bring about. What we hold in our head first we can some day hold in our hand. Ask Directed Questions™.
Visualize it day and night. There are two ways to imagine it. You can see yourself over there in the house and watch yourself walk through it. You can see how you behave in your home. This is great. Let it inspire you! Also, you can imagine it from your point of view as I previously described. BOTH are fantastic and powerful.
You can keep a vision board and get pictures of your home. You can tour homes with real estate agents and take your a picture of the home you want. AND take pictures with YOU IN the type of home you want. DO whatever you can to make the images real to you.
It Is Okay If You Don’t Have A Plan Yet
You may not yet know how you are going to make this happen and that is okay. Keep focused on what you want. Keep savoring the wonderful feelings. The more intensely you feel these as you imagine having it the more your subconscious works on it. You will develop a plan. You may want to set a realistic deadline date, or not.
In the meantime, enjoy it. Be grateful for everything. Feel passionate about the home. Know it is coming. Expect it. Think ‘I am creating this or something better!’ Allow for something even better than what you have created to be yours. Be willing to be surprised!
Be Committed And You Will Get Results
You don’t really get anywhere because YOU aren’t COMMITTED to any one direction. To get what you want you must be focused on what you want to the exclusion of all else. Keep your eye on the prize no matter what it takes or how long. Dedicate yourself!
Don’t compare, now to then. Don’t let not having it presently keep you from not having it in the future. Don’t be wishy washy, don’t go back and forth. Focus on what you want. Intend it! Create it! Make it happen! Have backbone more than wishbone. Persist in your pursuit.
Do not focus on what you don’t want. Learn the art of self control. Stay with your goal. Know what you want and imagine getting it and having it. Learn to manage your thoughts and feelings and make them work for you. Either YOU are in charge of your thoughts or your thoughts are in charge of you. Decide which it is going to be!
The key is to turn completely away from the negative and toward the positive. DO not let present circumstances dissuade you from your goal. Do not let obstacles distract you. Keep focused on creating what you want. What you think about you bring about!
You always get results! You always get results, intended or otherwise. You want to get intended results, don’t you? Then you must know what you want. You must know where you want to go. This is the necessary first step in the journey. Then you must commit to making it happen.
If you don’t know what you want or where you want to get how do you expect to ever have it or get there? Clarify your goals and dreams today!” Rex Sikes
This is YOUR day!
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Do This When Frustrated, Angry or Feeling Bad!
“How can you tell if you are focused on what you don’t want or what you do want? It is actually easy. Your have a signaling system that you can use. It alerts you when you are on or off track. You only need to learn how to recognize it to use it. It requires is becoming aware.
Your Feelings Are Your Signal System
If you are frustrated it is a signal you are focused on what you do not want. Negative emotion is the signal you are focused on what you don’t want. When you are feeling good and have positive emotions it is a signal you are focused on what you want.
Negative emotion only means you are thinking about what you do not want. Whatever you are thinking about mostly is what you get more of. You create the conditions of your life experience. You manifest more of the same. What you think about you become.
If you are frustrated, angry, depressed, anxious, worried, fearful, blaming and accusing, whining and complaining you are spending time and energy in a less than glorious place. The feelings that cause you to blame or complain are the signal.
If you catch yourself criticizing and speaking poorly about self, others, events and situations that is a signal. A clue you are focused in less than productive ways on what you do not want.
Once you become aware you are feeling negative, feeling frustrated, and you don’t like feeling that way you can do two things. First, you can get more frustrated, and more angry, you can get more intensely negative to the point where you think and say and commit to yourself, ‘never again!’ You can ramp it up and get to that ‘this is the last straw’ point. From this point you can make changes you need to.
That is one way of dealing with it. It can and does occur naturally for people. They just get to the point where they know they have to change. That intense emotion is fine as long as it serves to take them to a place where they stop focusing on the negative and begin focusing on the positive.
The negative feelings are the signal you are not focusing on what you want. However, if you don’t change your focus to what you do want you won’t have the relief or get the results you hope for. You must wake up, pay attention to the signal and change what you are doing.
You must switch your attention. THAT IS WHAT your feelings have been trying to get you to do. You feelings are trying to GET YOUR ATTENTION enough for you to notice so you can SWITCH!
Remember, if you always do what you always did you always get what you always got. It is an opportunity to be productively different.
Clarify What You Do Want
Use the powerful negative feelings to figure out what it is you do want. Stop focusing on the negative and start focusing on the positive. Commit to staying focused on the positive. Whenever you feel negative there is an adjustment you should make. That IS the signal you are off course.
You have an internal guidance system. You have an internal GPS. You have a system designed to be self correcting. The unwanted thoughts and feelings inform you that you are off course. Don’t fight them, celebrate when you recognize the signal and make the necessary changes. Less than glorious means time to change!
Some people have spent so many years ignoring or fighting and pushing down and repressing their feelings they have difficulty telling when they are feeling good or less than glorious. Still, you can learn to pay attention and benefit from this internal guidance bit by bit, Awareness is your key! It may be more subtle but you can do it.
Commit to paying attention. Do a self inventory frequently though out the day by asking ‘how am I feeling’ . Take a moment to evaluate and be honest. It is useful to color chart your feelings using crayon or markers to indicate the changes during the day.
Notice predominant colors and notice how frequently you actually fluctuate. This is a great learning tool Give it a shot and you may surprise yourself.
You can ask someone to assist you by pointing out when you are acting in certain ways. Just don’t bite their head off when they help. The goal is to become aware when you are feeling less than glorious so you can change direction.
Second, Make Incremental Change
You change from bad to a little bit better. Step by step. The goal is to feel a bit better. Actually, the goal is to feel the best you can most of the time, but if you are intensely down or angry going from that place to joyous is too big a leap.
Going from angry to frustrated is a smaller step and a worthwhile one. You are learning to lessen the anger and move away from it.
People either get frustrated and then angry or they can get angry and cool off to frustrated. It is like a gate that can move in either direction. A swinging door. So when you are really mad the goal is to cool off and begin to think of what you do want.
If you are down you want to get to a bit better place. A place more okay and begin thinking about what you do want. If you are depressed you may want to get frustrated and angry. At least, from angry you can act.
Because it is intense you create more movement. From there you can more readily change. Regardless, one needs to get to a place where ‘enough is enough’ and then make positive productive change.
What you want makes you feel good when you think about it. If when think about what you want you feel bad you aren’ t thinking about what you do want. You probably are thinking about how you don’t have what you do want.
You won’t feel good if you compare where you are to where you want to be unless you are celebrating closing the gap. If as you inch your way forward you are delighted the entire time then it is fine.
Gratitude Helps Make Everything Better
If you celebrate everything you are on the right track and you will feel better more of the time. How can you feel down and out, frustrated, angry or bored when you are thankful and happy and delighted about everything? You can’t!
Find every little thing you can to enjoy, and appreciate. The more you find the better you will feel.
Once you make gratitude and celebration a daily habit you will be thinking and feeling good most of the time. You will be much closer to making your dreams come true as you live this way. Then your head and heart is clear to find more opportunity and advantages each day. You are better equipped to handle obstacles, and disappointment. You are far more resilient and resourceful!
When you live in gratitude and celebration everything is incredible and getting better at the same time. It is one of the wisest and most powerful choices you can make. Celebrate everything, even the tough stuff! Look for the silver lining and emphasize it. Never waste an opportunity to feel grand!” Rex Sikes
Enjoy today!
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How To Use Your Negative Thoughts
“You aren’t one of those people who waste time and energy worrying about what you can’t do, are you? You know you will never get rich by focusing on being poor or on what you don’t have, right? I mean, if you don’t know where you are headed how do you ever expect to get there? Have you considered this?
You won’t know what you CAN DO by worrying about what you can’t do. You won’t get stronger by being focused on weakness. You will never discover what works by focusing on what doesn’t. You won’t get positive by thinking negative. HOWEVER, there is some use to negative thinking, did you know that?
How To Utilize Your Negative Thoughts
Whenever you catch yourself thinking about what you don’t want you can turn it to your advantage. You can use those negative thoughts, the ‘I don’t want’ thoughts to IDENTIFY what it is you do want. You can use them to make something better for yourself.
When you become aware that you are negative or focused on what you do not want THAT IS THE PRECISE MOMENT to say ‘I know I don’t want this!’ Then ASK YOURSELF, ‘What is it I do want?’ Focus strongly on what you do want and define it. Declare it! Affirm it!
‘I don’t want this. I WANT THIS INSTEAD!’
NOW you can do something powerful. You can move away from what you do not want and begin moving towards what you do want. NOW you know where you want to end up. You know your destination and can travel in that direction.
When you know what you don’t want, don’t have or don’t like it can help you get clear, precise, and targeted on what it is you actually do want. This is great because the more precise you can be, the more detail you can add into your mental images of what you DO want the more real it becomes to your subconscious mind.
It Begins With Awareness
The moment you become aware that your focus is negative or on what you don’t want STOP! THEN you stop creating what you don’t want. You stop attracting what you don’t want. Then you stop bringing about all the negative things you are thinking about.
We become what we think about. We get what we focus on. What we think about we bring about. Birds of a feather flock together.
If you are thinking negative thoughts you are creating more negativity. NOW your opportunity is to create more positivity. Now you can begin to create what you want instead. Stop thinking about what you don’t want. Let it go! Drop those thoughts completely!
Turn your attention to what you DO want. Keep your focus on it!
Take Control Steer Back To Center
Leave those not so good thoughts. Leave the less than productive thinking and complaining behind. Set your mind to focus only on what you do want. If your mind wanders off bring it back to what you want.
When you drive in a straight lane you are not going completely straight. You make micro adjustments to stay in the center of the lane all the time. You are constantly adjusting and steering your car towards the center of the lane or within the lines.
Consider the center the positive place you want to be. Whenever you notice yourself off center, thinking negatively, thinking about what you don’t want, thinking about lack, whining, complaining or blaming steer your mind back to the positive thoughts.
Do this and you will develop the habit of catching yourself and returning to the I Can Do place in your mind. Soon enough this process will become automated and you will naturally think more positive more of the time. This process is so cool! You’ll love it!
Remember, thinking and speaking are the same thing. Keep your words to yourself and to others positive and your life will truly change!” Rex Sikes
May you make it a marvelous day!
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Rex Sikes' Daily Inspiration and Gratitude 