Category Archives: Happiness

Act As If, Affirmations, Attitude, Blessings, Creating The Future, Focus, Getting Over The Past, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Happiness, Overcoming Difficulty, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Responsibility, Self Talk

You Need To Be The Author Of Your Own Life!

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focus on possibilties make it happen

“You could be limiting yourself and preventing you from living the life you truly want to live! Are you aware of that? You should find out if what you are doing is not only keeping you from your dreams and goals but keeping you from the good life right now.

What is your story? What are you telling others about who you are and what your day is like? You need to become aware of the story you want versus the story you keep telling.

You must choose carefully the story you want to tell because what you recount to others during your day is keeping you in your current reality. What you re-live in your mind and speech is who you are. If you talk about being stuck you remain stuck.

People spend much of their time regurgitating what has happened. They share all their disappointments and failures. They re-live over and over again the miseries from their past and present and wonder why they can’t get away from them.

I’ve said it before; you won’t get rich focused on being poor. You don’t get positive by thinking negative. You can’t move forward looking backward. You can’t be happy when all you do is complain. You won’t change if you blame others and circumstances for your problems.

You can’t live a rich, awesome, joyful and blessed life if you whine, complain, blame and recount disappointment and failures at the water cooler, over the cubby wall, at bars and restaurants, and dinner with your family. What you tell over and over again to others is what makes up your present reality.

In order to get away from it you need to tell the story that you want to be living.  You need to focus on the little things that you are grateful for. It is far more powerful and life changing to find and be thankful for something tiny than to be insincere in your gratitude.

You should discuss blessings, solutions, positive aspects of daily living. You can share how you did get over a problem and what did do that made a difference without spending a lot of time focused on the problem itself. Think about and talk about how your life IS the way you want to be. Discuss what you would be feeling and doing  if life were perfect.

Until you tell that story you’re stuck in the old story. You need to change the script you live from and share with others! You are the author of your life! Take charge and write the story, script it, how you want it. Take control. Don’t let it happen to you and then re-tell what happened that you didn’t want. That is being silly and foolish.

A woman came to me for coaching, not too long ago, complaining. She wanted life to be better and could not understand why she wasn’t making the progress she desired. I listen. It was easy to realize her focus was on everything that was wrong.

She felt weak and it was easy to see when she ‘shared everything she just had to get off her chest’ that it sapped her of her power.  She literally talked herself into feeling bad by what she chose to talk about. Many of us do this. Many who come for coaching have similar issues.  What we think about we bring about.

Gently, I told her she needed to re-write her speech. She had to author a new story. Instead of focusing on what she did not want and what was not right she needed to start talking about all that was right and what she did want.  I asked her to be detailed and specific so she could clarify and get it straightened out.

I told her in order for her to have the happy life she wanted she needed to live it in her imagination first and then share all the good thoughts and feelings she had when she spoke. She needed to focus on the good experiences of the day AND not the circumstances that got her down.  Living powerfully begins inside us first.

Before you know it she became happier and healthier and wealthier. Her life dramatically improved in a very short period of time. For some it happens quickly for some others it takes a little longer. She changed, because for the first time in a long time, someone told her it didn’t have to be the way she understood it.

She didn’t have to live crap over and over again. She could shift her focus away from troubles and onto blessings. I told her she could be what she wanted to be. I listened, I understood, I saw what was easy to see, and I recommended she take responsibility.

She did and she made  the changes with her new mindset. She now practices being positive! She shares positive stories and blessings without sounding like she has stepped out of a greeting card. She has made new habits of  choosing how she is feelings by what stories she is living from.

She understood she IS the author of her experience and she can write what she wants to live and be. Presently, she’s well on her way to a glorious new future. She understands that outlook and attitude, how we use words and what we think and share all day long, is what we become.

If you aren’t living the life you want? What do you think about and talk about most of your days. Instead of letting life happen to you and then talking about what you don’t like change where you put your attention. Be the victor not the victim. Don’t re-live wounds.

Focus more on what you want more of and less on what you don’t want. Realize you are the author of your life, take charge and write the life you want to live. Do it today! Don’t wait. Make it a habit.

Do it each day and you will soon be living that life. No one else can do it for you. Put a guard before your thoughts and words and only think and speak that which blesses, heals and prospers. Soon these will be your reality!” Rex SIkes

Make the most of today!

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Attitude, Beliefs, Blessings, Creating The Future, Emotions, Expectations, Faith, Flow, Friendship, Gratitude, Happiness, Law Of Attraction, Love, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Relationships, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Smiling, Success

Why It Is Important To Give And Get Recognition

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what u put out u get back

“In my recent post I pointed out that RAVE (my acronym for Recognize Appreciate Validate Excellence) is a wonderfully powerful and important gift for people and for yourself. When we get RAVEd we can feel important, confident, respected, liked, loved or any number of positive wonderful feelings.

That moment of recognition can be a life long positive memory and resource the re-ignites all those incredible feelings whenever remembered. That is good reason to be certain to provide this experience to people important to you in life and business. It becomes a gift that keeps on giving. It may become a highlight and cherished memory for them.

There is another powerful reason for giving recognition, appreciation and validation to others. Creating positive experiences for others not only benefits them but benefits you. Remember the notion of what goes around comes around. You benefit whenever you do something wonderful for another person.

What you put out there comes back to you. I do not mean that because you recognize others that others will recognize you. They might. They most probably will but that is not what is meant. It is like a smile. When you smile nicely at another person you are more apt to get one back OR you just feel good for helping to make someone else feel good.

When you give positive energy out with no expectation of getting anything in return; when you commit an act of kindness simply for being kind; when you treat someone else marvelously just because you wanted to be nice you are benefiting yourself. You get to feel good about it.

You feel good because you made others feel wonderful. Both parties feel good. If there were nothing else that alone IS enough reason. Still, there may be something else. There may be that positive energy you generate for others DOES come back to you in any variety of ways.

This is the point of the Golden Rule. Treat others exceptionally well, shower them with positive regard, love and friendship. Validate and celebrate another person’s success without envy or resentment and you benefit.

Put into motion positive thoughts and feelings. Even if they never know about it YOU transform yourself. You become a better person.It changes you!  AND even if there is no return you STILL become a better person because of it.

You become a better person because you go first. You create something wonderful. There is no waiting, no whining, no blaming there is only great thoughts and feelings being generated. You become what you think about most of the time.

You can improve yourself by helping others mentally in your thoughts and in realty by your actions. Both work and both are important. Fill your life with gratitude, validation, positivity, happiness, joy, feeling marvelous, and you are more healthy and wealthy. From this mindset you can create anything you want.

You want more love. BE MORE Loving! You want better friendships BE A BETTER FRIEND. You want more money DEVELOP A RICH MINDSET. You want to feel better THINK BETTER. Thought precede actions and actions precede results.

You want better results? Begin with how you think and feel. Put the very best positive energy to work for you and for others. Create a marvelous world to be part of! Imagine how incredible your life will be when you make this an automatic, reliable habit.” Rex Sikes

Celebrate today!

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Acceptance, Affirmations, Attitude, Blessings, Emotions, Friendship, Giving Unconditionally, Gratitude, Happiness, Joy, Love, Positive Affirmations, Positive Thinking, Success

Why RAVE Is Important To All People! Use It!

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beautiful thoughts positive emotions miracles

“What is it most people crave? They may not admit to it but they sure do respond well to it. Yes, they may downplay it when it happens, and attempt to act like it is no big deal, but it is a big deal and it is important. We all would like it much more often. Can you guess what it is?

In the olden days, not actually that long ago but it does seem a practice forgotten, companies used to send off their retirees with it. The military uses it, schools, churches and temples, charities, clubs and associations, frankly there is probably no organization of any size that doesn’t utilize it in some fashion. Can you name it now?

Okay, here it is. I call it RAVE.  Recognize Appreciate Validate Excellence! We all like to be recognized and appreciated. We need to feel validated. We respond well to others noticing our efforts and calling them out in positive ways. So when people have performed well through time or done something special they should be acknowledged. So RAVE about them!

Retirees used to get sent off with a gold watch and special thanks. The armed services, police, firefighters give medals for valor, service and sacrifice. Schools give awards for merit and diplomas, even scholarships. Businesses provide certificates, perks and dollar incentives.

Churches and temples, charities, hospitals have donor walls or plaques. The entertainment business has the Academy Awards among others. Nearly ever group of some kind has some ceremony or award they confer. There is a reason for this. Think about that for a moment.

These are long standing practices that exist for a solid reason. In some cases some of these ceremonies may have lost their special meaning but the practice has endured since early times!

People like and need to be recognized for who they are and for what they do OR for what they have accomplished. There are recognition ceremonies and banquets. People are brought up, told to stand up or in some manner spot lighted and honored or thanked. Though the recipient may down play this moment it is a very special moment.

People enjoy being recognized and typically perform better when they are. It is a special moment in their life. It can be used when people accomplish something, graduate from school or move up the ladder. Never underestimate the power of recognition and validation. People enjoy having others notice and it is important that we do.

Think about the important people in your life. Could be your parents or your children. It might be your friends and associates. It could be your employees or co-workers. Think about the people who mean a lot to you and consider how you might recognize them.

How might you provide a moment for them to shine? In what ways can you validate who they are and what they do and what they mean to you? Heck, we celebrate just another year of living with a ceremony. How much more important and meaningful is it to be recognized and validated for something other than simply growing older.

Let them know you value them! If you love them tell them and tell them some of the reasons why. Express your appreciation for them and let know how you feel. Come clean with your positive feelings of regard and gratitude and shower them with it. Help them feel truly special. Make their day with thoughts of lovingkindness.

Be specific too! Don’t just be general of vague with your praise but point out some specific behaviors you want to acknowledge. Have a ceremony if you can or a dinner. Make the occasion special, take some time and enjoy it. Make them comfortable and help them to truly feel how important they are to you and why they are.

People respond well to being awarded for merit so give them plenty of reasons to feel great about getting the special attention. Be genuine and they will get that you mean it. Imagine how good you might help someone else feel when you do this. Then remember there is someone else you absolutely must recognize, appreciate and validate. Yourself.

Pat yourself on the back! Recognize the progress you have made. When you have done something you intended to, when you have followed through and kept your commitments to yourself honor and respect that. Acknowledge and recognize it. Appreciate it and reward yourself. Love and thank yourself for being you. Feel the love! Genuinely gift yourself for your performance! RAVE about you to you!” Rex Sikes

Delight in this day!

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Act As If, Affirmations, Attitude, Beliefs, Creating The Future, Definite Chief Purpose, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Happiness, Learning, Overcoming Difficulty, Persistence, Personal Development, Positive Affirmations, Positive Thinking, Positive Thoughts, Rehearsal And Practice, Responsibility, Self Improvement, Self Talk, Success, Unlimited Power

What Kind Of Abundance Do You Experience? PT 2

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imagination-quotes-for-imagination-sets-the-goal-quotes

“Sometimes it seemed like I’d take one step forward and a couple steps back. Occasionally, I’d get disenchanted as I looked at circumstances and thought, ‘It just isn’t happening quick enough!’ Then I’d remember where I needed to return my focus to. I realized I was off course and need to get back on and focus on my destination and where I was headed. Course correction saved the day!

It was always a little up and down. When deep downs came along I was so much better able to handle them than ever before. What would have thrown me off for a long time now, while challenging, allowed me to look into areas I needed to in order to become more flexible, or be more persistent. I was and am learning!

I learned never to quit but to bend instead of break. Good times were plentiful and minor moments become more delightful. All in all life became so much more worth living! It always has been but sometimes we forget. I know I did. I was taking 100% responsibility for all the bad and the good and everything was getting better as a result. Thought, mindset, attitude always precedes action and results.

So slowly at times, more quickly at others, I evolved myself and my life into more of what I wanted it to be. My first steps seemed to be to stop getting so much of what I didn’t want. I had always been great at doing that. I created lots of troubles in my past.

Now, I was learning and accepting that I could be great at getting what I wanted too. I stopped focusing on what I didn’t want and began focusing on what I did want. What an amazing change that brought about!

It is awesome and fun to realize one’s potential and role as a creator in one’s own life. The power, the creative ability and the responsibilityIt is magnificent!  I take 100% responsibility, as I become aware of my part in it, for everything I have had, lost, get, will get and enjoy. All of it, everything! Doing this puts me in the driver’s seat!

Everything good and bad has always been up to me. Since I have adopted this position I am capable of so much more because it all boils down to me and my attitude instead of relying on others or blaming them. It is not about changing others or circumstances to get my way when less than glorious things happen.

I change my attitude, my thoughts, my responses and move forward with what I might do instead of blaming or criticizing. Instead of feeling stuck or dependent on ‘things’ to change I change! That makes all the difference in the world. I am not a victim but a victor in this mental stance.

I don’t care if it is actually accurate that we are 100% responsible I know this mental stance has helped me immensely.

Oh, believe me, I am a work in progress. I have much to work on,  but I have learned to accept that and be ‘cool’ with that. I am growing as a plant does. Whatever growing I have left to do I will do for as long as I have time left. I don’t expect to be complete I expect to discover more and delight more.

I know challenges may always come. Not so long ago something came up that just about took the wind out of my sails. After about a day I realized I had my attention in the opposite place from where I could have placed it. SO I changed my attention, had numerous discoveries and made things better. What took a day may have taken months or years previously.

Am I happy with my journey. You can bet your ass I am. I am thrilled! It began in bad times.  It got so bad I knew I had to make instant changes. I decided to fill my mind each day with thoughts that inspired me, helped me to feel grateful, and move forward. Step by step, day by day. All these years later, I could never be more pleased with a decision I made. Best one I have ever made in my life.” Rex Sikes

Have a wonderful day!

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What Kind Of Abundance Do You Experience PT 1

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you decide every second

“You can have anything you want in abundance. Health, love, success, money, things. Or you can have anything you don’t want in abundance. Illness, broken relationships, failure, poverty, no home or possessions. The critical question is what kind of abundance are you creating and attracting?

You will get whatever your predominate thoughts are about. You will make happen and attract whatever you think about and focus on most of the day all the days of the week. What we concentrate on occupies our mind, our attention and our energy. Our energy goes into whatever we are preoccupied with.

So if troubles; lack of money or mounting debt and bills, discord in relationships, difficult home life, career disappointment or being out of work, are what you think about most day and night you are keeping your troubles alive. Worry is negative goal setting. What you think about you bring about.

Some time ago I was doing okay. Then some bad things happened. One after the other more bad things occurred. I wondered, ‘Why all this bad luck? Everything is going wrong!’ I used a lot stronger language I can assure you. It seemed everywhere I turned it only got worse. I complained, I whined, I tried to fix it desperately but it only continued. At the height of it all, I gave up. I realized at some point I couldn’t change it as I was. I had to change me.

I made it a point to read positive inspiring material every morning first thing. I’d read a page, a chapter whatever I could make work for the day. I would do it no less than thirty days. So I began. I read and listened to inspiring audios whenever I could. Slowly during the month my mindset relaxed and my attitude began to change bit by bit. I cautiously began to apply some of the things I was reading about and learning. I felt grateful I was taking the initiative.

I vowed to stay sane and not get carried away or become one of these ‘pink’ energy bubble people I had spent so much time around and even dated in years past. I wanted solid, practical, applicable skills, thoughts, and behaviors that would transform me without me becoming doe-eyed and hugging trees.

I didn’t want to become a cosmic cosmonaut with my feet six inches off the ground. I wanted to live in the everyday world and get some relief from nagging issues I carried with me, even though I have been a life long student and proponent of personal change and development.

If I had to become a weirdo to be happy then I really wasn’t all that interested. I read things from ancient texts, I read Napoleon Hill again, some more, throughout the years. I read others, anyone and everyone, who seemed to suggest that there was and is a realistic way to make wonderful things happen without relying on mysticism and other ‘beings’ to do it for me.

What can I say. Those thirty days transformed my life. At the conclusion of the thirty I continued the practice. I do to this day. I have learned and grown and have seen and understood so much. I have much to learn and yet to understand. Life though, is so much more incredible than I could have ever imagined. I filled myself with gratitude and joy. I felt confident and successful! I felt happy!

It has nothing to do with things or accumulations it is the depth of the change within me that I value most. I can enjoy possessions in ways I never did before. I am excited and eager and enthused in ways I never was before. I live and love living. Really, about all I can say is ‘WOW’! I feel so blessed and so thankful!

I can trace back to precisely what the first incident was and then the second that made me begin to realize I needed to approach things differently. It was a very difficult time for me as things went from bad to worse. I point this out because it seems this is often the way we come to changing ourselves. Something gets so bad, or we bottom out and we say, ‘stop, no more, never again’ and we move on into new ways of thinking and being.

Every moment of life is amazing EVEN when it appears not to be. I have done some incredible things in my life and I got settled and was coasting. I began to take things for granted. It was easy to complain when things started getting tougher. I even enjoyed complaining. Except when I did complain more and more of the joy and goodness and delight drained from me. I learned to put a guard on my thought and speech.

I AM SO GLAD IT DID!!! Had I kept going as I was going I can only bet it would have sucked even more. Fortunately, some glimmer inside me, told me I had to take the driver’s seat of my own life again. I am so thrilled and happy and pleased with the journey ever since. Did the skies open up and riches rain down on me. Nope, all things take some time. Gradually, bit by bit things got better.” Rex Sikes   More In Next Post!

Have a delightful day!

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Are You Ready? When The Student Is Ready The Teacher Appears!

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old ways won't open new doors

“What makes a student ready? What makes a student? A student is one who takes interest in a particular subject, studies and learns. Then applies what one learns.

When I was a teenager, more than anything, I wanted someone who would show me the ropes in show business. A mentor. One day, by chance, I met a man. He was successful in the movie business, he had many successful proteges, and he saw something in me. He was willing to guide me for free.

He didn’t want anything in return. Truly, nothing, other than the satisfaction of seeing me make something of myself in the business I wanted to succeed in. That alone, terrified me. I was always second guessing his motives but I told him I was willing to do anything, professionally, it took to make it. I said that again and again.

So he told me what to do. He gave me the first step. ‘Oh, you don’t understand’, I’d exclaim, ‘I can’t do that.’ I would proceed to tell him why. He’d nod understandingly and explain that I could do that or do this other thing. ‘Oh no,’ I’d say, ‘I am willing to do anything but not that’. I didn’t want those lessons or could not see the value of pursuing a particular area.

Time and time again he would make suggestions. Most I would negate. Some I would try usually abandoning whatever it was he had me doing. He never complained. He completely accepted me resisting him and never threw up his hands or told me he would not continue. Our relationship lasted a number of years.

I left him eventually to find someone who could help me make it in showbiz. So what is a student? When is the student ready? A student becomes ready when the student is teachable. I was not teachable. I knew what I needed and was willing to do and not do. To say,’Yes, but’ and ‘no, you don’t understand’ and then provide reasons are really nothing but excuses. AND, pay attention here – Excuses ARE excuses and nothing else!!

The questions one has to ask oneself is ‘how teachable am I?’ Many people answer, ‘I am willing to learn anything’, but when the rubber hits the road they actually aren’t. I wasn’t. How teachable are you? How willing are you to change? How willing are you to change what you think and what you are doing to think and do something new?

Instead of being open and flexible of mind to take in NEW information and practices many people merely defend the old. That is what I did. I had all the reasons and defenses ready for why I could not or would not do or try something. If I didn’t think it would work or see the value in it I wouldn’t allow it in. I discarded it before understanding it by experiencing it. Excuses prevent new opportunities from occurring.

You cannot describe the taste of an orange to someone who has never tasted an orange. Nor can you describe the color red to the person who has never seen color. It is the experience of using the information that can be life changing. If one is not willing to apply the knowledge in order to change and get different and better results then one will remain stuck getting the same results they hope to improve. Instead of taking responsibility and becoming aware of their resistance most will simply blame others or circumstances thus insuring they remain the same.

It is the experience of tasting the orange that makes the difference. Information does not transform us. Knowing what to do and not doing it won’t make us a success. Applying what we know IS the difference that makes the difference. In order to learn, understand and apply it we first must be open to taking it in. We must not defend ourselves. We must let go of excuses and stop resisting.

People argue that what they previously learned, understood and know to be true is different from the new information they are being asked to accept. Instead of accepting the information they defend the old. They are not very teachable in that moment. In order to be ready you need to be an open vessel. I claimed to be open but was anything but. It is easy to self-deceive.

There is the story of a Master pouring a potential disciple a cup of tea. The master pours and continues to pour until the tea overflows and continues to overflow. ‘Stop!’ cries the potential student. ‘The cup is full.’ The Master replies, ‘When your cup is full you cannot add anything to it. Your cup must be empty. Go and empty your cup.’

The point should be obvious. The master deems that the student’s mind is too filled with what they already know. It is filled with too many potential objections, beliefs and resistance to be ready to learn. The student is not ready and open so is sent away. When ready the teacher appears. I was not ready. Many times I have not been ready. Just as with gardening the soil needs to be prepared and receptive to the seeds.

We need to recognize when we are listening only to speak and present our view instead of listening to gain understanding about things we don’t know about. We need to recognize when we are closed to new ideas and unable to accept information. We need to see when we resist and stop.

The way to being a good student is to recognize when we are not ready to learn and when we are ready to learn. Awareness is the key. For most of us this is a matter of ongoing management. The door is not always open. It is open and closed and open again. Then closed, and closed, then open. We need to discover when we close the door and open it to be available to new life changing information.

If we only understand the new opportunity, the new knowledge and experience, as an addition to what we already ‘think we know’ then it is just more information. Information alone won’t change us! We have to be willing to apply it. If we don’t use it we don’t know it. I ‘knew’ what to do! I was told what to do but I didn’t apply it so I didn’t get any benefit from ‘knowing’ the right things.

It is life changing when we are open and embrace it and use it. Then information, the lessons, lead us to new ways of thinking and being. Information doesn’t change us. Knowledge doesn’t change us. Only by using the knowledge can we begin to change. It is in the application of the knowledge where we learn the lessons. It’s the experience, the attempts, the defeats, the challenges that we learn from. Experience!

Seek to be open and available without judgement or analysis. You may analyze at another time but while learning it is not the time to evaluate the merit of what you are learning. You cannot fit a square peg into a round hole. The new material won’t fit into an old, already filled, container. You don’t put new wine in old wine sacks.

You can’t defend what you already know and remain open. That is not being open. That is refusing to accept! The mind is full, it is occupied it is busy and the Master cannot add any more to it BECAUSE it IS full. Some things take a very short time to learn; minutes at most but they require an entire lifetime to master. Quick to learn and a lifetime to master is the principle. Mastery comes by successfully applying the information in multiple circumstances over a duration of time. Correct repetition breeds good habits.

Learning to be open and being willing to change can take a long time to master. It is so simple it can be difficult to grasp. Stay open, be willing. We may claim we are open many times when we are not. I certainly have! Awareness is the key to change. Many times we will fall but we need to get back up and try again. Frequently, we will close the door to change while thinking we have left it open. We need to be able to notice when we shut down and resist.

A student is humble not defiant. A student is receptive. When the student is ready the teacher appears. Who is the teacher? It could be anyone and anything. It could be a life experience. It could be a formal teacher, a book or a seminar. The teacher IS whoever presents the lessons when the learner’s mind is open to receive. You can even be your own teacher at times.

No one can provide you life changing information that will make any difference whatsoever in your life until you are open and ready to receive it. They can preach it, teach it and shout it as loud and long as forever but until you are ready to hear it and embrace it the wisdom it falls on deaf ears. You have to be open and willing. You must also be willing to take the time to master the lessons. There is no substitute.

One might as well be yelling at a bunch of insects who are marching into certain destruction. They don’t know what is ahead. They can’t see it. – AND – The insects simply don’t understand the message! They don’t get the necessity of understanding it NOW! They aren’t able yet to understand you OR that you are attempting to help them! Unless you are open and teachable no teacher can teach you. It is more accurate to state a teacher presents IT IS THE LEARNER who learns. YOU either learn or you do not!

It is totally up to each of us. It is totally up to the individual student. The responsibility is 100% the student’s to be a good student. When you are a great responsible student you can learn from any source. The source may be wonderful or hardly adequate but as an incredible learner you can learn anything from anyone!

The questions one should continually ask oneself is, ‘How teachable am I?” and ‘What can I do to remain open and easily learn?’

If you are willing to learn you must be willing to change. You can’t remain the same if you want your life to be transformed. For your life to change you must change things in your life. You must change your thoughts, feelings and behaviors to get different results. If you are not willing to learn and are unwilling to change you won’t! You must also consider, ‘What is my willingness to change?’

Mindset, attitude and beliefs, your thoughts, always precede what you do and determine the results you get. If you are not pleased with the current results you are getting you must be willing to change things for you to get the results you’d prefer to get. Doing the same thing over and over again won’t get you different better results!

It is totally, and completely up to you and no one or anything else. This is the truth each of us must face. The responsibility is 100% ours alone. So, how teachable are you? How willing to change are you? Be honest with yourself. When you are ready the teacher does appear.” Rex Sikes

Have a blessed day!

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Why You Should Never Fear Negative Emotions

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that i do today imporves ur tomorrows

“You should never be afraid of negative emotions weak or strong. In fact, the more intense the negative emotions the better.  ‘What?’ you say, ‘Are you crazy Rex? The more intense the negative emotion the better. WHY is that?’

Strong or intense negative emotions are useful. They are valuable indicators that you can use to make positive changes in your life. Never fear them! Welcomed them when they occur. Understand them.  They are an alarm system, a signal alerting you. They arise to get  get your attention whenever whatever you were doing isn’t working.

The negative feeling IS intense to get your attention that what you’re thinking or doing or feeling is not working. Negative feelings alert you so that you can do something about it. Embrace them. Welcome them for what they are. Signals alerting you to opportunity!

All of our emotions are useful indicators. They inform us when we are on target and moving towards our goals and when we are off. They alert us to when it might be prudent to slow down and use caution so that we remain safe. It is a wise person who pays attention to and understands these emotional messages.

The goal is to feel good most of the time. When you are feeling marvelous your feelings let you know everything is going well. Your thoughts are aligned with your desires, there is no resistance and you are moving ahead towards accomplishing your goals. You are focused on what you want and you feel great! This is how it should be!

When life gives you something you don’t like or you discover yourself feeling bad the accompanying negative feelings alert you that your focus has shifted. It has shifted from what you want to what you don’t like. You are now focused on what you do not want.

You have taken your eyes off your goad may be focused on the circumstances around you or the distance between now and the accomplishment of your goal. You might be impatient or focus on the lack of completion. Instead of focusing on how wonderful everything is and will be you might be thinking how everything sucks.

When the feelings are intense; when you’re feeling bad; when you get to that frustrating, negative,  angry, place when that last straw breaks the camel’s back and you say NEVER AGAIN! This is a great place to be! These intense emotions cause you to decide,  ‘Never again! I will not be broke! I will not be afraid!  I will not be weak! I will not be fat! I will not be a victim’ This IS the moment when change can occur!

At this moment you have to stop focusing on what it is that you do not want and shift your focus.  Turn your attention to what you absolutely do want. The negative feelings alerted you that you were focusing on what you don’t want NOW you have the  opportunity to clarify exactly what it is that you DO what.

‘I want to be rich! I am brave! I am strong! I am learning to maintain my ideal weight or I can weigh X’, I am in charge. I accept responsibility for my life! I am in control! I make things happen! I am happy! I love life!’

You turn your back on what you don’t want and aim your thoughts, like a laser beam, at what you want to create. You return your focus to the positive, the optimistic, that happy thoughts and feelings.

You have an internal guidance system. An internal GPS that loudly lets you know when you have gone off course and when you need to turn back the other way. The negative feelings are useful to help you clarify. To specify precisely what you do want to include in your life. They help you get detailed about who you want to be, what you want to do and what exactly you want to have.

Never fear them, instead welcome them and embrace them. They alert you so you don’t travel too far in the wrong direction. Most people misunderstand negative emotions and when they arise they fight them. They resist them which causes them to persist. The go further down the dark tunnel by thinking and feeling more of the same.

You don’t have to when you recognize them for what they are. Then you can allow them and use them. Then you can turn your back and focus on what you want and the negative emotion is no longer an issue. UNTIL the next time you go astray.

Isn’t it wonderful that you have an internal means that allows you to get back on track? The more intense the feelings  whether positive or negative the quicker and easier you’re going to be able to make positive change.

The more you feel wonderful, the longer you feel blessed and joyful the quicker you bring about the changes you seek. As soon as you are alerted that you are off track and no longer thinking or feeling wonderful IS when you deliberately change your thoughts and feelings back to the best you have.

This practice of correcting course when you go off is precisely what you want to make a habit of. You want to keep returning to the positive, powerful, joyful feelings. You are training your mind so this is a great habit to develop!!!

Be thankful you have emotions that signal you. They let you know whether you are getting closer or further away from you goal. Use them as the indicators they are. Be thankful and grateful you have these. Celebrate you have an internal signaling system. When you appreciate how well you work you will work even more smoothly! Enjoy the process!” Rex Sikes

Have a great day!

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Act As If, Attitude, Beliefs, Blessings, Creating The Future, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Goals, Gratitude, Habit Formation, Happiness, Positive Thinking, Success, Unlimited Power

How To Get Whatever You Want! How To Manifest It!

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you atract what you focus on

“What is the secret? Is there a key to making what we want happen? What should we do to make our dreams come true? Can we speed up the process of getting our heart’s desires?

The secret is: Have fun! Delight! Celebrate and enjoy. Feel good! Feel blissful. Smile, laugh, appreciate. Be light and be lite! You will get your goal faster when you feel really, really, really good most of the time. When you are feeling good everything is working for you.

It does not happen quicker by screwing up your face. Sweat, hard work and effort won’t make it occur any quicker. Thinking about it and then thinking about not having it will only make it take longer. You make it happen quicker when you feel blessed most of the time!

The process is simple. You conceive it, believe it and achieve it. You decide what you want. See it as already accomplished. Keep your attention on what you want and how good you feel. Feel the wonderful feelings of having accomplished your dreams.

Energy flows where your attention goes. Keep focused on feeling good, feeling blessed and enjoying life! Maintain your attention there. Keep your attention riveted there come what may. No matter what current circumstances are maintain the attitude and feelings that you are blessed, blissful and filled with gratitude.

Have fun making it happen. Live life fully! Live fully this moment. Be thankful and happy and positive. Feeling wonderful will make everything seem like magic. It will get you through tough times faster and easier than pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps.

You can’t force your dreams to happen you allow them. Even though you are creating them you allow them to come into being.  You stop resisting, you celebrate, laugh, delight, enjoy and allow whatever IS to be. Accept and appreciate everything. This is the habit you want to create.

The attitude you maintain throughout everything life offers is: ‘Life is grand! This is marvelous! I am so blessed! Good things always come my way! Even though I can’t yet see it something good is happening! I always land on my feet! This is exciting something good is coming!!’ This mindset that gives you power.

The simple secret is to feel the best you can as often as you can. Feel good most of the time, each moment! Feel good about everything going on and not going on. Even though you can’t see into your future know there are good things coming your way.

No matter what circumstances are like, even if horrible, remain blissful and feeling blessed. Be excited now and anticipate your future as wonderful! This is the attitude to develop and maintain.

Feel great and be positive! Savor life! Enjoy everything! Believe that something better is coming to you. Don’t be impatient. Don’t pressure yourself, let go of stress, fear and doubt.  Those will only prevent you from making your dreams come true.

No matter what is occurring stay focused on wonderful feelings. It may seem difficult at first. That is okay it will get easier and easier. The more you learn to stay feeling good the easier it becomes. You think more positive thoughts and feel better which leads to more positive thoughts and good feelings. A momentum develops

When this attitude becomes a habit you become unstoppable. You become powerful as a creator and a person who can make happen whatever it is you want. Life becomes incredible because you automatically think and create more good things. You feel marvelous! Life becomes a true adventure! You delight in it all!

How do you make this a habit?

Every time you notice you are thinking or feeling less than gloriously deliberately steer your thinking back to the most positive. Find away to  feel the best you can feel. Focus on whatever you need to focus on to feel even just a little bit better. The goal is to feel the best you can each and every moment.

Keep doing this long enough and you will make returning to the positive a habit. Keep celebrating long enough and you will make celebrating, even in the face of adversity, a habit. Habits are formed by consistent repetition over a period of time. Habits are formed by practice. You deliberately take control and make this a habit.

When it becomes a habit and automatic you won’t even have to think about it because you will automatically respond to whatever life offers with  ‘Great, I am so blessed! Something wonderful is coming my way. I may not be able to see it, explain it or justify it but something wonderful is about to happen. I feel it! I just know it’

At this point everything gets easier and moves faster. You think more positively. Because you have more positive thoughts and feelings you get more positive thoughts and feelings! The momentum increases. Birds of a feather flock together! Like attracts like. More good feeling s produce more good feelings. Enjoy!

By feeling good and thinking positive you can easily be, do or have anything you desire. You are in the optimum creative place. From your own personal abundance you create more. You live large and live well feeling good every moment. Life becomes magical Things begin going your way.

Attitude is everything! When your attitude is right there is no stopping you. When you attitude is right you make happen what you want to happen. You are intentional and deliberate. You create and attract everything you need to bring manifest your dreams and desires. Yes, it becomes magical’ Rex Sikes

Have a wonderful day!

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Attitude, Beliefs, Creating The Future, Definite Chief Purpose, Expectations, Faith, Focus, Get Rich, Gratitude, Happiness, Persistence, Positive Thoughts, Responsibility, Success

What Kind Of Person Are You? Are You A Wisher Or A Wanter?

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the man on top of the mountain didn't fall there

“Do you hope things will happen or do you make things happen? Do you wish or do you want? Are you only a dreamer or someone who achieves what they put their mind too? Are you a ‘someday’ person or do you feel the moment is now? What kind of person are you?

Attitude is what separates those who hope and dream from those who want and get. Attitude is what makes someone a Can-Do person and a person who achieves their dreams. Achievers are people who have clarified specifically what they want, set their mind to getting it and keep going no matter what may present itself as obstacles.

An achiever is willing to pay the price. An achiever takes 100% responsibility for his attitude. The achiever maintains a positive mindset and maintains it daily. She looks for solutions and the lessons in every situation. The achiever always continues to learn and is flexible while others don’t and are not.

The achiever knows it is 99% mind set and 1% effort that makes the difference and are willing to put in the effort to be successful. They know that obstacles contain within them seeds of advantage and opportunity and search for these while others wallow and give up when times get tough.

The are courageous and tackle problems even when fearful. They do not let their thoughts or problems stop them. They wrestle it down to manageable size and move forward in spite of fears. They are able to do this because they work on keeping thinking right. They believe they can do it even when they don’t yet know how they are going to.

They don’t sit back and wait for some day. They initiate and act. The don’t think someone or anything outside of them will do anything for or to them. The take charge! They don’t whine or complain. The take charge of themselves and the situations. The decide they will dictate how things will be instead of letting events or circumstances rule the day.

They may fall and fail many times but they don’t stop. They persist. They learn and look for solutions, adjust and adapt as necessary along the way to their ultimate success. They understand that defeat is only temporary and that troubles are just a part of life. It may be darkest before the dawn but that never stops them. They bring their own light.

Yes, attitude is everything! They do not hope to make it happen they know they will make it happen. They accept that when there is will there is a way. The can laugh, delight, feel joy and bliss. They are able to celebrate life and live with passion. It is not all work but lots of play. They can have fun and have a great time on their way to accomplishing what they want. They feel good most of the time!

You can hope or you can have. You can dream AND make the dreams come true. You can develop a Can-Do mind set and learn to become unstoppable. You can be, do and have anything you want. It is simple. Because it is simple most people never bother to do but you can. Earl Nightengale called it the strangest secret because it is so simple most people missed it.

You become what you think about! That is truly the secret. You get what you keep thinking about day and night. It doesn’t matter what it is. Positive or negative whatever you most think about you create for yourself. This is why it is YOUR responsibility. Whatever you hold in you mind you have in your life. If you want it different you have to change what you are thinking about. It is 100% up to you!” Rex Sikes

This is your day. Make it whatever you want it to be!

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Are Your Habits Creating Success Or Failure?

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the choice to have a great attitude

“Success and happiness is a matter of habit. So is failure and defeat. Either your habits support you and uplift you or they don’t. You get whatever you think about most. You get back whatever you do most.

You need to ensure that you have the right habits to get what you want.  You can’t succeed easily if you have the habit of defeated thinking and feeling. If your habits don’t support you YOU MUST develop new habits to replace the ones that work to keep you down.

You rarely get what you want if you are not the person in charge of your own thinking. You might be lucky once in a while but most often you are like a cork bobbing in the water. You are drifting. Sometimes things work out sometimes they don’t.

The only way to insure more consistent results is to put yourself in charge and take 100% responsibility for everything that happens good or bad. You may not like this idea but once you completely accept this notion you come into your true power.

You stop blaming. You stop putting the causes for your success or failure outside of yourself. It is accurate that there are outside influences on you but you are the one who decides how you will respond. Circumstances are neutral until you decide whether they are positive or negative.

A true person of power can celebrate during the greatest disasters and in the face of calamity. When you can be delighted and celebrate regardless of what is going on around you or to you YOU are not a fool. You are a victor because you do not let things bring you down

You determine how you will feel. You are in charge. You are powerful and positive. You created successful thought habits.

From this seat of power you are a creator. Because you feel good in spite of circumstances you are able to more readily recognize opportunity and take advantage in ANY situation. Consider this example, successful people know how to make money in any economic climate. Making money for them is habit.

Many make their most money when times are bad. It isn’t the situation that should dictate you, rather you should dictate how you take advantage of any situation. When things don’t work out they way you may have hoped learn what you can from the experience.

When you have the mental attitude that you are in charge no matter what you make things happen. When you have the attitude that no matter what you are blessed and lucky all the time then you open yourself to have a most incredible life. When you can be happy and celebrate regardless of circumstances life is delicious.

To be the victor you must tell your mind what you want over and over again. There is no end to it. Repetition creates habit. Correct repetition creates the correct habit. Persistence is necessary in order to get what you want. It is simple YOU become what you think about day and night.

The subconscious mind will accept any statement that you keep repeating to it through words and by any other means. You affirm what you want in an emotional state of highly charged positive feelings. Intense feeling accompanying your thoughts, (internal images) and your self-talk (affirmations) IS what makes it work.

Repeat your affirmations and visualizations (as suggested in previous posts) in a state of enthusiasm backed up by faith and the subconscious mind acts more quickly. Faith is a state of mind wherein whatever it is you are going to do, whatever it is you want, you can see it already in a finished act even before you begin.

You can do whatever you make up your mind to do unless you give away your power along the way. Feel blessed, celebrate, be enthusiastic and joyful no matter what. Have faith that you will make happen what you want to happen regardless of whatever life throws at you. Make these a habit and nothing can hold you back!

Know you will find a way even if you don’t know what that way is at this moment. It will become obvious to you as you move forward. Have faith! Believe in yourself. Then what you want is taken over by the subconscious an acted upon immediately.  Stay with it, never give up and you will get what you want. Act from your power.

Define your chief purpose. Write it out so that you clarify it, understand it an memorize it. Start repeating it day in and day out. See it in your mind’s eye as already accomplished. Celebrate and enjoy! Say thank you all through out your day! Delight in all moments and you will discover so much more!

The more you think positive and the more you feel good the quicker and easier the process becomes. The faster you make it a reliable habit. The faster and easier you make things happen because you create momentum. Keep repeating this process until your subconscious mind picks it up and automatically works on it. This is how you make success a habit!” Rex Sikes

Have a fantastic  day!

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